Blogs

1. First thing you wash in the shower? Not sure......I don't think I have an order.....

2. What color is your favorite hoodie? Baby Blue

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed
again? of course! My husband is sweet as pie and loves kisses.......

4.Do you plan outfits? Sometimes. But not usually.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now? A little annoyed, rubbed the wrong way and hot.
6. Whats the closest thing to you thats red? My tobacco pouch.

7. Do you say aim or a-i-m? aim.

8. Tell me about the last dream you remember having? last night i had nightmares about my brother, an ex friend who in my dream turned out to be my sister and my dad.....My brother was doing coke with my 'sister' and I tried to stop them and my dad accused me of being a liar- a fight ensued.

9. Did you meet anybody new today? Nope.

10. What are you craving right now? REAL GOOD LEMONADE.

11. Do you floss? yes, when i remember to.

12. What comes to mind when I say cabbage? Cabbage Patch Kids.....and Garbage Pail kids.

13. When was the last time you talked on aim? I don't use it.

14. Are you emotional? I can be.

15. Would you dance to the taco song? probably not since i have no idea what it is.
16. Have you ever counted to 1,000? no ...

17. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it? I don't bite it......usually I just drool on it to melt it and then slurp it.i am seeing if you are actually reading this.
18. Do you like your hair? It's ok. I have been having issues with it since i cut bangs.
19. Do you like yourself? For the most part, yes. Except when I am in a mood like I am now.....
20. Have you ever met a celebrity? Yeah I have met a few.
21. Do you like cottage cheese? On occassion.
22. What are you listening to right now? nothing.

23. How many countries have you visited? Haven't left the USA yet- but I a,m hoping that changes soon.

24. Are your parents strict? Psh! If they were I wouldn't have to parent them.

25. Would you go sky diving? Possibly.

26. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush? Poison him, maybe No. No. I wouldn't. I'm nice.

27. Would you throw potatoes at him? Hahaha maybe shoes

28. Is there anything sparkly in the room you’re in? Not that I can think of.

29. Have you ever been in a castle? I don't know? Probably when I was younger.......mansions for sure- maybe one looked like a castle

30. Do you rent movies often? No

31. Who sits in behind you in your math class? What? Im too old for school.

32. Have you made a prank phone call? Yes.

33. Do you own a gun? Nope.

34. Can you count backwards from 74? I am sure i could.

35. Who are you going to be with tonight? My husband

36. Brown or white eggs?Brown, cage free.

37. Do you own something from Hot Topic?
Nope.

38. Ever been on a train? Yes.

39. Ever been in love? Yes.

40. Do you have a cell-phone? Yes.

41. Are you too forgiving? Sometimes. I have been hardening myself though.....

42. Do you use chap stick? not often.

43. What is your best friend doing tomorrow? Turning in her two weeks notice at her shitty job!!!!

44. Can you use chop sticks? No.....I suck.

45. Ever have cream puffs? yeah..they're good

46. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect? yeah. It was alright.

47. What was the last question you asked? I dont know

48. What was the last CD you bought? Bought???? No clue.

49. Boys or girls? Boy. One boy. Husbandboy.

50. What is your bus number for school?whoa. no clue. I went to like 100 schools.

51. Is your hair curly?wavy- sometimes its spiral curls, if I don't brush them out.

52. Last time you cried? A couple nights ago.

53. Ever walked into a wall? hahaha yes i have.

54. Do looks matter? depends.

55. Have you ever bought anything from Pac Sun? What? Who? Where?

56. Have you ever slapped someone? Yes.

57. Favorite time of the year? Fall.

58. Favorite color? Green and Blue (can't choose between them.)

59. Are you sarcastic? Sometimes.

60. Do you have any tattoos? yes - 2

61. The last person you held hands with? My husband.

62. Do you sleep with the TV on? nope.

63. Where was your default picture taken at? the woods

64. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people? I used to, now i just pity them.

65. Do you like your life right now? Yeah i am happy with what I have.

66. How often do you talk on the phone?Almost every night.

67. What is your favorite animal? kittie kats

68. What was the most recent thing you bought? groceries

69. Do you have good vision? eh. most of the time.

70. Can you hula hoop? yup!

71. Could you ever forgive a cheater? hmmmmm- depends.

72. Do you have a job? nope.

73. Can you handle the truth? yes i prefer the truth. I hate bullshit.

74. What are you wearing? jeans and a t shirt

75. Have you ever crawled through a window? yes

Read the blog but hurry starts soon.

1. First thing you wash in the shower? my teeth
2. What color is your favorite hoodie? black
3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? yes
4.Do you plan outfits? no, i try to make sure all my clothes match my other clothes
5. How are you feeling RIGHT now? a wee anxious and sore
6. Whats the closest thing to you thats red? my cranberry and vodka
7. Do you say aim or a-i-m? aim
8. Tell me about the last dream you remember having? i had one where i woke up really angry at my roommate. like angry enough that i was going to wake him up and inform him of this fact.
9. Did you meet anybody new today? nope
10. What are you craving right now? some uppers of some sort
11. Do you floss? not usually
12. What comes to mind when I say cabbage? cabbage and noodles
13. When was the last time you talked on aim? i am talking to people now
14. Are you emotional? not really
15. Would you dance to the taco song? ???
16. Have you ever counted to 1,000? not that i recall
17. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it? lick it... ocean i read your response
18. Do you like your hair? i want to dye it but i am waiting till after the wedding
19. Do you like yourself? more or less
20. Have you ever met a celebrity? i guess it depends on how you define celebrity?
21. Do you like cottage cheese? only in a hungarian dish that uses dry cottage cheese and salt pork or bacon recipe
22. What are you listening to right now? the tv
23. How many countries have you visited? most of the caribbean, mexico and canada
24. Are your parents strict? i'm getting married in two weeks, i have been dating my fiancee for ten years. he is still not allowed to be alone in my room (at my parents' house) with me.
25. Would you go sky diving? hells no
26. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush? sure, if nothing else, it would make for a good story
27. Would you throw potatoes at him? if i had some on hand, it would make for a good story
28. Is there anything sparkly in the room you’re in? the tv maybe?
29. Have you ever been in a castle? yes
30. Do you rent movies often? we have netflix
31. Who sits in behind you in your math class? i am not in class...
32. Have you made a prank phone call? long ago, yes.
33. Do you own a gun?no
34. Can you count backwards from 74? yes, in multiple languages none the less
35. Who are you going to be with tonight? i went to dinner with friends and now hanging with vgoraz
36. Brown or white eggs? i do not really eat eggs
37. Do you own something from Hot Topic? a shirt or two
38. Ever been on a train? yes
39. Ever been in love? well yes
40. Do you have a cell-phone? yes
41. Are you too forgiving? no, i hold grudges
42. Do you use chap stick? i prefer softlips
43. What is your best friend doing tomorrow? working
44. Can you use chop sticks? yes, i recently acquired this skill
45. Ever have cream puffs? yucky, i do not like pastries or sweets
46. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect? not that i recall
47. What was the last question you asked? why are we watching this?
48. What was the last CD you bought? not a clue
49. Boys or girls? whoever is more sane
50. What is your bus number for school? i have not ridden a bus in like 15 years
51. Is your hair curly? rather straight
52. Last time you cried? a few days ago
53. Ever walked into a wall? amongst other things
54. Do looks matter? at times
55. Have you ever bought anything from Pac Sun? a bathing suit and some shorts
56. Have you ever slapped someone? many times
57. Favorite time of the year? autumn
58. Favorite color? don't have one
59. Are you sarcastic? very much so
60. Do you have any tattoos? nope
61. The last person you held hands with? vgoraz
62. Do you sleep with the TV on? no, just a fan
63. Where was your default picture taken at? my avatar on here has been the same for years. there used to be a post count limit for avatars and i randomly googled something, it hasn't changed since
64. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people? i suppose, tho i do not really keep track of people who annoy me
65. Do you like your life right now? eh, i want this whole wedding thing to be over. its causing way to much stress and bad feelings.
66. How often do you talk on the phone? i try to avoid it at all costs. there are like 5 people who i will call and thats it.
67. What is your favorite animal? penguin
68. What was the most recent thing you bought? bathing suit
69. Do you have good vision? i could use glasses, but i am too cheap to get some
70. Can you hula hoop? yeah
71. Could you ever forgive a cheater? i think it really depends on the two people and what happened
72. Do you have a job? sorta, i took the summer off and the job thinks i am returning. i am not so sure tho.
73. Can you handle the truth? i tend to tell to always more or less tell the truth. i do not understand making up elaborate lies to cover up something you did
74. What are you wearing? pyjamas
75. Have you ever crawled through a window? yes, a few times,

Ok, so I can speak freely on here as there is only 1 other person who knows me on here and he's to far away to say anything about this to the one it's about. I am in LOVE with a guy named Brooks. If you will notice I tied his name into my 1st in years poem entry in the "words" forum. He's cute, funny, sweet, and everything that draws me in! But I don't want to be tied down yet. I've dated some dorks and the last 2 serious ones turned out toally sucky... so I'm in no hurry to be in a relationship. But still he's so cute! LOL We can talk for hours and we both like the same things. He's more shy then I am so everybody thinks I should ask him out... but I've never really asked a guy out. I know lame! But whatever. I'm going to bed now, lots of work to do tomorrow. I bid thee all a night of sweet slumber. I pray you awake to the beams of a radiant sun and may the feeling of wonder surround you all the day throgh.

I'; not feeling super energetic today, so I wont adding a tonne.

Some of the oddball equipment includes the M1 Garand, the FN FAL the RPK and all sorts of random selections. A common one is the MG-42, for its terrific rate of fire and horrifing sound.

I myself perfer the AK74U to the Mp5.

Then there is a whole set of "sanitized weapons" things we bring back from overseas, buy on the street, or buy under the guise of civilian law enforcement or movie prop use. These are used for politically sensitive operations. Which are most, and tend to the most used weapons in operational service. The non sanitized ones being mainly used in training.

The mandate of the black teams is national counter terrorism, hostage rescue when the capabilities exceed the civilian police tactical teams skills, as well as protecting Citizens overseas and the intrests of the country overseas. That can range from a direct action operation to rescue a citizen held hostage by a terror group in a 3rd party nation, to interfearing with an enemy country's goverment, to just recce on some flair up. (such as the Russia/Georgia war...We learned Russia isnt nearly as incapable as claimed by some)

Most of this is done under the idea of "plausable denyablity" that is. The operators carry nothing to link them to the country, or the countrys armed forces.

Sometimes, a 3rd party, usually poor and un-capable country will request assistance with some sort of situation. The unit can be tasked to these, and often is. Espically during these, they tend to work with aid from other 3rd parties and the host country. (Say working with a Russian SVR Zaslon team, who also provide a ship to stage of of and the local police providing primiters, and things like food and lodging)

well thats enough for now.

i do not understand people and their need to engage in drama... i get my fill from reality tv and people on here

because of my wedding, and who was invited and who wasn't, some people aren't speaking to each other. it comes down to why some cousins were invite and others weren't. i was honest when i told everyone involved that i do not know how my mom decided who to invite. but people are all sorts of butt hurt and my mom is creating lies to "fix" things. except its making a bigger mess and people will not stop calling me to complain.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I do not die.


That is some fuckin powerful shit I want that read at my funeral. %)

Gggggg

I have been a meth user for the most part of 17 years. I have went from Casual usage to Selling an ounce and a half a day. This all happened in the course of a few months. I have went from 16 up until now which is 33. It is at this point in my life that I feel it is time to quit. I don't want people to assume I am worthless no good or any of the like. I have 2 college degrees, 3 professional certifications and until very recently had a full time job. I worked 8 to 5 for 5 days each week. I did all that while being a full blown user nothing casual about it. I would go through personally with my girlfriend at the time about 1 gram a day. I also would like to add that if I had a way to verify it I would, I am as honest and trustworthy. I dont lie, cheat, steal and have trouble with people that are like that. I have went through up to a year of sobriety at certain points of my time using.

Some might ask if you seem to function why would you quit if they are the curious type. Well even though I never let it affect my morals, just about everyone I know that does it can't say the same. My last girlfriend cheated on me and lied to me then blamed or treated me like I was the one to do it. I know that is directly related to drug use. So to answer that question more directly...I am quiting more for the people around me and because they, after a while, loose themselves to it and forget who they are and what is morally correct. As a side not my ex I have known for 18 years prior to dating. She has spent time in jail, but that is something I have been both fortunate and lucky for I have not. I have two kids one girl and one boy. From my past experience I know not having my girlfriend will make it a little worse on me but I will manage.

I mean as I type this I am smoking my last of what I had. So when I asked if anyone wanted to tag along I mean follow along with my posts as I sober up. I will post at least 1 to 2 times a day even when I can't open my eyes hardly. Readers must take into consideration that I will be bitchy at times and down right offensive but if that don't bother you then please read along. I figure it might be beneficial to both the forums and I. The readers will have a chance to read first hand how it is for someone to sober up after being a hard core user for a long time. An it will give me the illusion that I have some sort of company and might not get the really low alone feeling as bad. Post up if you guys have any questions of comments because the real adventure don't start till day after tomorrow. That is when it will get really rough because it will be out of my system for the most part.

So here's a stolen survey!

I, [who cannot be named for legal reasons] hereby declare to adhere to certain standards within my trade and promise to do what is right and fair inasmuch that is permitted by my [ i l l e g a l] profession.
I hereby swear to the following:


Hygiene

When mixing up any powder or liquids, I promise do it on a clean surface, with a clean blade/card/ in as clean wraps/bags as I can manage. If I must keep my wares hidden in socks/pants/pockets/mouth/arse, I shall be especially vigilant as to how they are wrapped and ensure they are covered at least 3-4 times and sealed properly. I shall store/hide my wares in a cool/dark and dry place to avoid contamination and moisture.


Timekeeping

I promise to not lie about the time I will take to deliver my wares to my customers, or to leave my customers standing on street corners for ridiculous lengths of time, especially in winter.

Respect
I promise to treat my customers with dignity and respect whenever possible. I will not fall prey to the traps of 'powder power' and will never lord my wares over customers less fortunate than myself. I will never take advantage of women or men for drugs.

Ethics

I will abide by the knowledge that overdoses occur more frequently for those just out of prison or rehab and will always endeavour to tell such customers the risks involved. I shall never sell a person their first 'hit' and will do what I can to dissuade the young and inexperienced.

Adulterants

I will never cut any powders or liquids with anything I believe to be harmful or unclean. I will always use the safest cuts on the market and will keep abreast of developments regarding the safest cuts available, only if cutting is necessary.

Credit

I promise not to be overly tight about giving credit to regular customers and if I know they are sick or desperate, I promise to afford regular customers at least one bag on tick.

(print out and...) Sign or stamp here

Hello everyone!

As some of you may have noticed, we've finally chosen a new moderator for Blogs. Please join me in welcoming ocean!

I'd also like to take this chance to thank everyone who applied for the position. It was a surprisingly tough decision, which is why it took a little while to get it done.

Thanks again!

Hhhhgbbnn

The wood lay in the brown cardboard bag and as I picked up a piece, intending to throw it into the fire, I got the sense that I was disturbing the wood and that perhaps it didn’t want to be burnt, and then I was overcome with the feeling that everything I was doing was wrong, and that what if I was meant to live my life a different manner? I would never know.

I decided I needed something else to think about, so I did what I have always thought I should do when I needed inspiration – I went to sit at a coffee shop to look at people and create dialogues in my head. I’m not that strange, it’s not that I don’t have any friends to sit at coffee shops with me, but don’t you think it’s far better creating a different world sometimes when you get tired of reality? Even if it is in your head?

In my reality, the weathered man with the sad eyes at the next table isn’t sitting all by his lonesome self, pondering over his life and letting the emptiness eat him up from inside out. He is doing what I’m doing, he is seeking inspiration and will eventually find a mindset that will keep him sane. Or so my reality hopes for him.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed an old woman sitting outside the café in her torn and tattered clothing, watching the world go by. Something compelled me to rise from my seat and approach her, so I did, and to my surprise instead of sadness there was a mischievous, insane sparkle in her eyes, like she had figured the world out and the people she was looking back into were mere mortal fools.

Excuse me, I said, I couldn’t help but notice the light on your face, what have you found?

Do you really want to know? She was teasing me.

My affirmative nod prodded her and she went on.

I have found that there are nice people and terrible people. I have found that sometimes there are reasons for awful things that happen and sometimes absolutely none at all. The nicest of people can get the worst of luck, and vice versa. I see all these people walking by with melancholy in their eyes, and I can tell they wish they were in someone else’s shoes. But with everybody wishing to be someone else, do you not see what we are? We are all the same. We are the same race breathing the same air. If you are sad today, there are many others sad with you – and despite this sadness there are millions of others happy. Therefore in the wider outlook of things, the balance of sadness and happiness, goodness and badness is perfect. This is life, and if you fight it or seek reasoning or otherwise, you end up in a spinning cycle of pondering and depression.

And that, she said with a contented smile, that feeling I feel when I think about it all, is what helps me sleep at night even when it gets too cold.

For a few days.. a haze.

my own pain of personal ignorance

if ur anything like me -- whom had a rough life as a child you might have learned to over compensate.

Today I spent it stoned, naked, in bed listening to pandora radio credence clear water station.

and browsing facebook for anyone that is a friend.

ive been up for 5 hours and smoked 10 ciggs....


However, in this shitty pity I pay, I did come across an interesting shaman woman local- whom i will be seeking meditation and healing with, so even in my troubles, hahaha, i am aware consciously of needing a solution

Only to wake up to a gray cloudy day,
with my big elton john-
yves saint laurent vintage
- powder blue tinted-
sunglasses
and purple skirt
with morning cafe au laite.



#200

So here's a stolen survey!

Name - David (real original S/N huh!)

Age - 29 (in Sept)

Sex - Male

Current Location - Canadia

Hair Colour - Dark brown with around 0.5% grey

Eye Colour- Blue-green to light blue to grey, depending on my mood/physical state

Do you smoke? - Tobacco? Not really

Do you do Drugs? - Not often anymore, but on occasion, yup. I prefer downers these days, but don't have access to much. Which is probably for the best. I used to do much much more.

Do you Drink? - Regularly (2-3 days a week), but usually not to excess

Pepsi Or Coke? - Neither. Ick.

Fav Colour - Deep forest green.

Do you like thunderstorms? - Do I ever!

Number of tattoos? - None yet

Number of Piercings - None

What would you like to get pierced? - I toyed with the idea of a bridge piercing ages ago. Still might get it someday for shits and giggles

Have you ever cheated on your partner? - Can't cheat if you're single

Have you ever been cheated on? - See above

Have you ever kissed a boy? - Kissed? No. Been kissed? Once or twice.

Who was the last person that kissed you? I can't recall.

Are you in a relationship? Nope

Have you ever broken any bones? - Nope

Whats your favorite alcoholic drink? - Tough one. I've been on a beer kick lately, but I do enjoy some good vodka. Or a nice shiraz. Or Black Label.

Pets - None

Number of Siblings - One of each, both younger

What website do u go to daily? - www.bluelight.ru, a handful of webcomics, Google Reader, and a few others

Do you believe in love at first sight? ...

Own a stuffed animal? - Yup

Do you shower daily? - At least

Right or Left Handed? - right, but only weakly

Number of Past Regrets - Big ones? Less than five. But I'll have to agree with ocean-- while my life hasn't turned out how I would have liked 15 years ago, I like who I am and where I am now, and my decisions (both good and bad, positive or negative) are what have brought me here.

Hm. Seems a bit short. I should go dig up some of the old-school Journal surveys...

So hoptis was thinking, how do I create an area that only blog staff, senior mods and admins can view? I could create a new forum, but does it really need a whole forum?

Why not a blog?

All blogs mods should be PM'd the username and password to this account when they come on board, create a new blog entry when you have a topic you want to discuss.

Senior mods and admins should always be able to view and post comments to this blog, the only way to create new entries is to login as Blogger.

Blogs staff by default will of course also be able to view and post comments to this blog. W00t?

Name - Desiree

Age - 28

Sex - woman

Current Location - USA

Hair Colour - browwnish reddish

Eye Colour hazely greeny

Do you smoke? -like a chimney

Do you do Drugs? - just the occassional perc

Do you Drink? - on occassion

Pepsi Or Coke? - pepsi

Fav Colour - green or blue or an in between

Do you like thunderstorms? -love 'em! Miss 'em!

Number of tattoos? -2

Number of Piercings - no more- i let my holes close

What would you like to get pierced? - lip again

Have you ever cheated on your boyfriend? - No.

Have you ever been cheated on? - eh-

Have you ever kissed a boy? - ummmm. yes.

Who was the last person that kissed you? - my husband

Are you in a relationship? - married
Have you ever broken any bones? - nope-knock on wood.

Whats your favorite alcoholic drink? - irish cream

Pets - 2 kitties babies

Number of Siblings - 1 brother

What website do u go to daily? - www.bluelight.ru

Do you believe in love at first sight? - or something like it.

Own a stuffed animal? -i don't think so

Do you shower daily? - or a bath.

Right or Left Handed? - right

Number of Past Regrets - i try not to regret......everything brought me to where I am now.

I've really been craving healthy food lately. I've been eating lots of salads with grilled chicken on top.

I would kill for a granny smith apple right now!

I also want to make homemade granola bars when I get home. Honey, raisins, cinamon (perhaps a little oatmeal). Yum!

When I was in rehab in '93 I ate like a pig. Huge salads plus whatever the accompanying meal

I hope I get to do that again this time around

Name - Sandi

Age - 28

Sex - woman

Current Location - my study

Hair Colour - brunette

Eye Colour hazely greeny

Do you smoke? - randomly - usually more socially.

Do you do Drugs? - yes, in moderation though.

Do you Drink? - yes, in moderation

Pepsi Or Coke? - coke

Fav Colour - green

Do you like thunderstorms? - they're ok - i get a little scared that the house will blow up.

Number of tattoos? - 3 and more to come

Number of Piercings - 8 and maybe more to come

What would you like to get pierced? - my nipples

Have you ever cheated on your boyfriend? - Not my fiance no, but i did cheat when i was young and stupid years and years ago.

Have you ever been cheated on? - not that i am aware of.

Have you ever kissed a boy? - er, yeah.

Who was the last person that kissed you? - my fiance

Are you in a relationship? - yep, engaged.

Have you ever broken any bones? - nope

Whats your favorite alcohlic drink? - wine

Pets - 2 gorgeous dogs

Number of Siblings - 1 sister, i guess.

What website do u go to daily? - www.bluelight.ru

Do you believe in love at first sight? - no but i believe in lust at first site.

Own a stuffed animal? - nope.

Do you shower daily? - definitely.

Right or Left Handed? - right

Number of Past Regrets - none, i never regret anything as all mistakes are a learning curve.

Chest infections are crap!! Though i have been sent home from work to rest as tomorrow will be a super busy day no doubt, since everyone else has the day off on Saturdays and us hairdressers have to slave away. It also doesn't help that i work with one lady who is pretty much useless and can't cut hair to save her life, and the other lady is just so bloody slow i feel like screaming at her when there is about 50 people waiting and i am doing all the friggin work.

So yeah, i am sick and this is my blog so i will sook all i like thank you very much!

Anyways, at least i get to put my feet up and be on bluelight for the day. The good thing about being sick is that you have a good excuse to justify to yourself why you don't need to do any house work

Though i am sure ill get irritated and start cleaning later on. Since owning my own house i have become a bit of a clean nazi, which is a good thing.

I love my dogs, they are here beside me and wrestling away. They are smelly little shits though, so that is another job on the list of 1 million things to do. I wonder if i can manage to bath them in the shower with me? Might work with Cherri as she is so small, but Maxx might be a problem since he is a big woosy la la.

My blog is boring.

The End.

I've been really unsure of pretty much everything lately. I'm lost to things that were but unquestionably clear before.
I wish I could find some stability. I know I have to be patient. I'm everything but patient. It's really hard for me to recognize feelings even within myself. I'm not sure anything was ever stable, perhaps just sustained. A pacifier for my inconsistencies. I live in [redacted] and I'm not really sure if I even want to be here. I moved here from [redacted] a year ago and I don't think I've ever really settled.

Even now... I'm trying to get all of this out of me and I'm being vague and still feeling as if everything is convoluted.

Until next time.

I can not believe how since my vacation- (and off and on since the beginning of the year) how nutty I have been!
I have unresolved issues that I really need to work on.
If you have read my blog, you know it is mainly issues with my parents. It makes me feel like a silly teenager with annoying emo tendencies or angst
I have been saying things out of the ordinary for me- being short or even rude with people.
I am one of thosse annoying people who does not like to be depressed and feels that negative energy will darken my spirit. I like acceptance and understanding and I am struggling with accepting and understanding.
Soon, I will work through this.
I was so excited for the Blog Theme of the month being philospphy and spirituality b/c I love that subject- and I just have felt it would be wrong to even go there with so much negative energy pouring out of me.
I am determined to start thinking more positively!
Hopefully as the Sun moves into Virgo, I will feel better........(Leo opposes my Sun (earlier this month) and my Merc and Mars in the 4th house )
Ah I never thought I'd look forward to the sun in Virgo so much as now.........