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So I'm aware that my thoughts are erratic, emotional, unbalanced and that I get dark quickly. Others recognize this as well.
I've made a doctor's appointment for a psych evaluation for medication.
Now that I'm aware, I question everything regarding my moods and thoughts. I ask myself 'Is this a normal thought or one of those fucked up ones?' or 'Is this feeling justified or based on some sort of unreal reality that I've created?'
I fucking hate it. I feel 'off' more often than not due to this awareness that I could be off. I surround myself with 'what ifs'.
I really look forward to this doctor's appointment. I want to get back to feeling like me again.
What really scared me was that a few days ago I figured I would try St. John's Wort as an alternative to meds. Fuck that shit. I have to assume that there was a correlation between taking that shit and the horrible mental anguish I found myself in. I hadn't experienced that feeling in a LONG time. Suicidal, believing fantasy (no matter how unreal I knew it to be), hopelessness and sleeplessness.
I don't want to feel like this anymore. Its not rational.
People I am close to recognize it so I start thinking that it must be worse than I believe. If I'm feeling it what are they seeing from the outside?
Monday will be here soon and then I will be on the road to some answers.
Just gotta get through until Monday without causing any damage to myself or the relationships I value.
I wish I hadn't sat in denial for so long. It appears I have delayed a bit too long.
I'll suck it up and before I know it, I'll feel better
I've made a doctor's appointment for a psych evaluation for medication.
Now that I'm aware, I question everything regarding my moods and thoughts. I ask myself 'Is this a normal thought or one of those fucked up ones?' or 'Is this feeling justified or based on some sort of unreal reality that I've created?'
I fucking hate it. I feel 'off' more often than not due to this awareness that I could be off. I surround myself with 'what ifs'.
I really look forward to this doctor's appointment. I want to get back to feeling like me again.
What really scared me was that a few days ago I figured I would try St. John's Wort as an alternative to meds. Fuck that shit. I have to assume that there was a correlation between taking that shit and the horrible mental anguish I found myself in. I hadn't experienced that feeling in a LONG time. Suicidal, believing fantasy (no matter how unreal I knew it to be), hopelessness and sleeplessness.
I don't want to feel like this anymore. Its not rational.
People I am close to recognize it so I start thinking that it must be worse than I believe. If I'm feeling it what are they seeing from the outside?
Monday will be here soon and then I will be on the road to some answers.
Just gotta get through until Monday without causing any damage to myself or the relationships I value.
I wish I hadn't sat in denial for so long. It appears I have delayed a bit too long.
I'll suck it up and before I know it, I'll feel better
Life is like a movie sometimes good sometimes bad,the only difference it has no rewind,whats done is done theres no point in looking behind,no body said its easy but we must keep our head up even in our own misery,even if we built it,its hard to ignore because when we try to we just want more
"Pathetic," she said. "That's what it is. Pathetic."
She turned and walked slowly down the stream for twenty yards, splashed across it, and walked slowly back on the other side. Then she looked at herself in the water again.
"As I thought," she said. "No better from this side. But nobody minds. Nobody cares. Pathetic, that's what it is."
She turned and walked slowly down the stream for twenty yards, splashed across it, and walked slowly back on the other side. Then she looked at herself in the water again.
"As I thought," she said. "No better from this side. But nobody minds. Nobody cares. Pathetic, that's what it is."
Not totally sure on the number of weeks it's been, so that might be a bit off.
It's amazing to really notice how much plastic is around us in our lives and how many people are so incredibly wasteful.
At one of my internships, I sit with these women who are absolutely brutal to one another. Their conversations are so shallow and they are really unpleasant to be around. The commonality between them though, aside from their workplace, is how wasteful they really are. They get food from the lunch room every day, which isn't a problem--They get it in "take out" containers. When ordering, you have the option of "here" or "to go". "Here" equates to a reusable (sometimes a paper) plate. "To go" is a typical Styrofoam container. I have watched these people for weeks now: Every day they get the "to go" containers, and every day those "to go" containers are thrown in the trash. A few weeks ago, I inquired as to why my instructor got the food "to go" and she immediately got offensive and said she "likes it better." Uh, that makes a lot of sense.
It's also amazing to witness them being so absolutely two-faced to these people they supposedly like. I can only imagine what they say about me when I am not there. It is like high school again. It is no wonder this facility is the bottom of the barrel of one of the health systems we have around here.
Anywho, back to the plastics and my second goal:
My consumption of things that will only be put in the trash can has drastically gone down. I've come to realize that I can live without the majority of the foods that are packaged in plastic. Those foods that come in plastic that I would rather not live without, I have found ways to get them without plastic (take carrots for example--they come in a bag, or they come loose). I still allow myself one item each shopping trip that can be in plastic, but even that is dwindling, as I no longer am attracted to buying products that only come in plastic. They're typically not very wholesome foods.
My second goal has made a lot of progress but once again has been put on pause--There is simply too much going on around me to focus on me for a little while. Once school is over (approximately five weeks), focusing on the house and the move will be my main priority. I do not plan on seek out a career right after graduation--That would, simply put, be asinine with all that is going on. I figure by September/October, things will hopefully have settled down and I'll have gotten all the information I need to really, truly, see where I want to go with this career field. 'Cause, honestly, I don't want to work in a hospital or nursing home--I mean, I'll do it, but not for a long-term career.
Ideally, I would like to do some sort of one-on-one, long-term work with customers/people who aren't "patients" or "residents" or anything other than "paying customers" utilizing my services. That may indeed be a very far-fetched pipe dream, but I would be much happier working 8-4:30 five days a week doing something like I do now (general office work) and working a couple hours each week with someone on their eating habits, than I would be working 8-4:30 five days a week in a hospital/nursing home.
While I have left you all in the dark about what exactly my second goal entails, you've probably figure out by now it is an on-going "self growth" type of goal. I would still rather not mention exactly what it is, but it has come a long way and is putting me on the path to where I want to be in this crazy world and time we live in.
I plan on still keeping progress on both of my goals in this blog, but it might not be weekly--Though weekly is a nice goal to aim since then I get it done every other week instead of aiming for monthly and doing it once a quarter. 8)
It's amazing to really notice how much plastic is around us in our lives and how many people are so incredibly wasteful.
At one of my internships, I sit with these women who are absolutely brutal to one another. Their conversations are so shallow and they are really unpleasant to be around. The commonality between them though, aside from their workplace, is how wasteful they really are. They get food from the lunch room every day, which isn't a problem--They get it in "take out" containers. When ordering, you have the option of "here" or "to go". "Here" equates to a reusable (sometimes a paper) plate. "To go" is a typical Styrofoam container. I have watched these people for weeks now: Every day they get the "to go" containers, and every day those "to go" containers are thrown in the trash. A few weeks ago, I inquired as to why my instructor got the food "to go" and she immediately got offensive and said she "likes it better." Uh, that makes a lot of sense.
It's also amazing to witness them being so absolutely two-faced to these people they supposedly like. I can only imagine what they say about me when I am not there. It is like high school again. It is no wonder this facility is the bottom of the barrel of one of the health systems we have around here.
Anywho, back to the plastics and my second goal:
My consumption of things that will only be put in the trash can has drastically gone down. I've come to realize that I can live without the majority of the foods that are packaged in plastic. Those foods that come in plastic that I would rather not live without, I have found ways to get them without plastic (take carrots for example--they come in a bag, or they come loose). I still allow myself one item each shopping trip that can be in plastic, but even that is dwindling, as I no longer am attracted to buying products that only come in plastic. They're typically not very wholesome foods.
My second goal has made a lot of progress but once again has been put on pause--There is simply too much going on around me to focus on me for a little while. Once school is over (approximately five weeks), focusing on the house and the move will be my main priority. I do not plan on seek out a career right after graduation--That would, simply put, be asinine with all that is going on. I figure by September/October, things will hopefully have settled down and I'll have gotten all the information I need to really, truly, see where I want to go with this career field. 'Cause, honestly, I don't want to work in a hospital or nursing home--I mean, I'll do it, but not for a long-term career.
Ideally, I would like to do some sort of one-on-one, long-term work with customers/people who aren't "patients" or "residents" or anything other than "paying customers" utilizing my services. That may indeed be a very far-fetched pipe dream, but I would be much happier working 8-4:30 five days a week doing something like I do now (general office work) and working a couple hours each week with someone on their eating habits, than I would be working 8-4:30 five days a week in a hospital/nursing home.
While I have left you all in the dark about what exactly my second goal entails, you've probably figure out by now it is an on-going "self growth" type of goal. I would still rather not mention exactly what it is, but it has come a long way and is putting me on the path to where I want to be in this crazy world and time we live in.
I plan on still keeping progress on both of my goals in this blog, but it might not be weekly--Though weekly is a nice goal to aim since then I get it done every other week instead of aiming for monthly and doing it once a quarter. 8)
hey just wondering if anyone can help me. Im currently taking the antibiotics co-amoxiclav and metronidazole can i take extacy whislt taking these or not ??
BL is a huge community..
So why is there such a large number of people in this world wanting to get off tap, people looking for new and improved methods of getting off tap, people actually getting off tap as I type this (lucky bastards!), and finally - people seeking help because they've been out of it too often and for too long and taken too much.
Do we seek escape from reality? And why - is it so bad? Or is the escape so good?
Do we maybe have too much knowledge about how things work, knowledge we don't need and maybe tend to abuse?
The answer to all those questions is probably yes, and everyone's reasons are different.
And I realise these aren't particularly original thoughts, just wanted write it down cos, you know, blog and stuff.
What's your reason for getting out of it?
Are you trying to cope with the world around you or do you want to discover new facets of that world?
I guess for me it's a mixture of both, getting away from the world can lead to unexpected discoveries about the world and about myself.
and this is also enjoyable: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fu_dP4TwxvE
(well, I like it!)
:D
Dave suggested that I post this letter here from my original post in The Dark Side. I don't know where I got the idea to do this, maybe it was just out of anger but I finally decided to tell my depression off. Like Dave, I'm not expecting a response, but that's okay, what had to be said was said 
Dear depression,
Fuck you. For 15 long years you've controlled my life, and to be perfectly fucking honest I'm sick of it. I know how we met. Being tormented and ostracized by my peers, I needed something to turn to. I mean,what makes more sense than to make myself feel like complete shit when I'm being treated like complete shit? Why not push it into myself? At least then it would make sense why it was done to me if I can find different ways to hate myself and everybody around me. I know how our relationship has been. I wake up feeling alright, and then one stupid little thing happens and it sets me off. "Why does everybody hate me?" "Why am I so fucked up?" "Why can't I get a fucking girlfriend, oh right its because you're ugly as fuck, and you're a fucking idiot". You've made my decisions, you've made my enemies, you've made my life. Worse, you've made me attracted to the feeling of being down, of being hated. I don't really believe that, but you've made it appealing in my mind. I've been trying to let go of that feeling. I may never, but I know now that I can live without it. What about your best friend, anxiety? Yeah, fuck him too. I know how much you love to work together, give me an anxiety attack and follow it up with some depression. Fucking wonderful.
What have you ever done for me? Oh right, fucking nothing. You're a fucking parasite, you feed and feed off of any self-confidence and happiness that I have, until its all gone, along with me. You tell me what to do, you tell me where to go. All the missed opportunities in life, all the friends that I've lost, everything I've let go, it's because of you I could never reach for them again. But now I'm letting you go, and I won't try to reach out. I'll watch you fall, fall, fall, fall, until you're forever gone from my life. It would be a stretch to say that you had full dominance over my life in the first place. I've experienced joy, happiness, accomplishment. But you've sucked it all away, you've made sure that I won't ever remember it, and to make sure I'll never experience it again. And to that I say no more. You've made me feel like I've never had a chance to pull myself up, to never experience things. You've allowed me to be pushed around not only by others, but by myself. You had let them tell me what to do, you let me tell myself what to do when I knew it wasn't in reasoning.
You've invaded every aspect of my life. My long walks around this damn town trying to figure myself out, it was an escape from you. You found me there. Playing guitar. You found me there. Blazing with friends. You found me there too. Just being with people I care about. You found me there too. The hours I've spent wandering around this town trying to escape from you, trying to figure out why me, and why things are the way they are, it isn't enough to escape the hell you've created for me. Not anymore. There's no escaping you, I've learned. No matter where I go, who I'm with, you will find me as long as I hold onto you. You bring back the memories I wished to forget, and you let go of the ones I wanted to hold onto forever. The people who I hold close to my heart, you know how to destroy my care for them within a day. And then you let me gain it back, only to spit on me again. You've made me not give a fuck, you've made me hurt, you've ruined me.
No more.
You're done. I'm fucking through with you, I'm fucking done running from you. No drugs until I know I can live without you. You won't ruin them for me, you won't make me become dependent on them, you won't make me use them to escape you. I know I can, but not while you're around. I know I'm strong enough to handle you, because you're just a worthless fucking piece of shit like you've made me feel for the last 15 years. You reflect everything about yourself onto others, and you make them feel as bad as you do. You're fucking misery. You're a fucking parasite who will no longer feed on me. Know why? There are people who care about me, I'm not a worthless fucking piece of shit, I decide my how my fucking life will be, there is more to life than you've allowed me to see. I fuck up, I do stupid things, I hurt people, I make bad decisions, and I still will. But guess what? THEY'RE MY FUCKING DECISIONS. You won't make me think the only happiness doesn't exist in this life. I won't be laying in bed for hours, I won't be succumbing to the pain you've inflicted upon me for so long. I won't be looking at the happy side of life, I won't be looking at the sad side of life. Both just contradict each other. I will look at life as life is. Good is there, bad is there, and guess what, its fucking life. But you won't decide how I feel. I'm stronger than you, I'm better than you've made me feel, because I'm over you, there's a life past you and I'm gonna fucking live it. In fact, imagine you didn't read a single word of this. Just go back and read the first sentence, and take every single word into account. No two words have ever summed up a four paragraph letter better than that.
Sincerely,
Badfish.
Dear depression,
Fuck you. For 15 long years you've controlled my life, and to be perfectly fucking honest I'm sick of it. I know how we met. Being tormented and ostracized by my peers, I needed something to turn to. I mean,what makes more sense than to make myself feel like complete shit when I'm being treated like complete shit? Why not push it into myself? At least then it would make sense why it was done to me if I can find different ways to hate myself and everybody around me. I know how our relationship has been. I wake up feeling alright, and then one stupid little thing happens and it sets me off. "Why does everybody hate me?" "Why am I so fucked up?" "Why can't I get a fucking girlfriend, oh right its because you're ugly as fuck, and you're a fucking idiot". You've made my decisions, you've made my enemies, you've made my life. Worse, you've made me attracted to the feeling of being down, of being hated. I don't really believe that, but you've made it appealing in my mind. I've been trying to let go of that feeling. I may never, but I know now that I can live without it. What about your best friend, anxiety? Yeah, fuck him too. I know how much you love to work together, give me an anxiety attack and follow it up with some depression. Fucking wonderful.
What have you ever done for me? Oh right, fucking nothing. You're a fucking parasite, you feed and feed off of any self-confidence and happiness that I have, until its all gone, along with me. You tell me what to do, you tell me where to go. All the missed opportunities in life, all the friends that I've lost, everything I've let go, it's because of you I could never reach for them again. But now I'm letting you go, and I won't try to reach out. I'll watch you fall, fall, fall, fall, until you're forever gone from my life. It would be a stretch to say that you had full dominance over my life in the first place. I've experienced joy, happiness, accomplishment. But you've sucked it all away, you've made sure that I won't ever remember it, and to make sure I'll never experience it again. And to that I say no more. You've made me feel like I've never had a chance to pull myself up, to never experience things. You've allowed me to be pushed around not only by others, but by myself. You had let them tell me what to do, you let me tell myself what to do when I knew it wasn't in reasoning.
You've invaded every aspect of my life. My long walks around this damn town trying to figure myself out, it was an escape from you. You found me there. Playing guitar. You found me there. Blazing with friends. You found me there too. Just being with people I care about. You found me there too. The hours I've spent wandering around this town trying to escape from you, trying to figure out why me, and why things are the way they are, it isn't enough to escape the hell you've created for me. Not anymore. There's no escaping you, I've learned. No matter where I go, who I'm with, you will find me as long as I hold onto you. You bring back the memories I wished to forget, and you let go of the ones I wanted to hold onto forever. The people who I hold close to my heart, you know how to destroy my care for them within a day. And then you let me gain it back, only to spit on me again. You've made me not give a fuck, you've made me hurt, you've ruined me.
No more.
You're done. I'm fucking through with you, I'm fucking done running from you. No drugs until I know I can live without you. You won't ruin them for me, you won't make me become dependent on them, you won't make me use them to escape you. I know I can, but not while you're around. I know I'm strong enough to handle you, because you're just a worthless fucking piece of shit like you've made me feel for the last 15 years. You reflect everything about yourself onto others, and you make them feel as bad as you do. You're fucking misery. You're a fucking parasite who will no longer feed on me. Know why? There are people who care about me, I'm not a worthless fucking piece of shit, I decide my how my fucking life will be, there is more to life than you've allowed me to see. I fuck up, I do stupid things, I hurt people, I make bad decisions, and I still will. But guess what? THEY'RE MY FUCKING DECISIONS. You won't make me think the only happiness doesn't exist in this life. I won't be laying in bed for hours, I won't be succumbing to the pain you've inflicted upon me for so long. I won't be looking at the happy side of life, I won't be looking at the sad side of life. Both just contradict each other. I will look at life as life is. Good is there, bad is there, and guess what, its fucking life. But you won't decide how I feel. I'm stronger than you, I'm better than you've made me feel, because I'm over you, there's a life past you and I'm gonna fucking live it. In fact, imagine you didn't read a single word of this. Just go back and read the first sentence, and take every single word into account. No two words have ever summed up a four paragraph letter better than that.
Sincerely,
Badfish.
The actual electronic cigarette has been doing living for almost several years and it is a clever gadget aimed at supplying cigarette smokers which has a healthier option. Apparently additionally useful in helping to lessen as wll as stop smoking totally.
go through to gain knowledge about it electronic cigarette.
Despite the fact that electronic cigarettes are much more healthy compared to tobacco, nicotine is very enslaving. If you're not a smoker, I undoubtedly would not begin. If you're a grown-up who already smoke and you're simply searching for a way to reduce the amount, or even quit, I recommend researching e- cigarettes.
Smokers experience signs or symptoms such as chronic breathing problems, heart problems, and also breathlessness. The fear involving dying is what leads lots of people to stop smoking cigarettes. It will take Two or three significant initiatives before mission can be achieved and infrequently may take even longer. Stopping smoking is usually a studying course of action through which problems stated in the first try help improve chances of accomplishment throughout the subsequent test. This is a slow process, which needs effort. Once the man or woman lastly visits the actual quitting day, anybody puts a stop to cigarette smoking therefore it may be known as the final period.
Numerous physicians give guidance to all or any ex-smokers to stop booze temporarily after giving up, because drinking alcohol based drinks generally seems to stimulate episodes throughout cigarette cigarette smoking. Because smokers use cigarettes to alleviate frustration, anxiety, along with worries; giving up smoking typically can make it difficult to get by means of their daily routine. Those individuals may wish to check out a psychologist, whom may help these cope with their brand new problems or perhaps issues.
A lot of people always smoke realizing these types of unsafe conditions, because they believe that using tobacco offers benefits such as to reduce anxiety, nervousness, satisfaction, as well as pounds maintenance, convinced that stop smoking is tough and also won't end up being an easy task to attain. Those who quit smoking nonetheless have a very drastically reduce life expectations when compared with continuing people who smoke. Any time smokers could quit in a early age, it is a huge profit because they are exposing by themselves reasonably for you to fewer cigarettes.
For associated information http://www.ebay.com/itm/Electronic-...ltDomain_0&hash=item4602792550#ht_1301wt_1159
go through to gain knowledge about it electronic cigarette.
Despite the fact that electronic cigarettes are much more healthy compared to tobacco, nicotine is very enslaving. If you're not a smoker, I undoubtedly would not begin. If you're a grown-up who already smoke and you're simply searching for a way to reduce the amount, or even quit, I recommend researching e- cigarettes.
Smokers experience signs or symptoms such as chronic breathing problems, heart problems, and also breathlessness. The fear involving dying is what leads lots of people to stop smoking cigarettes. It will take Two or three significant initiatives before mission can be achieved and infrequently may take even longer. Stopping smoking is usually a studying course of action through which problems stated in the first try help improve chances of accomplishment throughout the subsequent test. This is a slow process, which needs effort. Once the man or woman lastly visits the actual quitting day, anybody puts a stop to cigarette smoking therefore it may be known as the final period.
Numerous physicians give guidance to all or any ex-smokers to stop booze temporarily after giving up, because drinking alcohol based drinks generally seems to stimulate episodes throughout cigarette cigarette smoking. Because smokers use cigarettes to alleviate frustration, anxiety, along with worries; giving up smoking typically can make it difficult to get by means of their daily routine. Those individuals may wish to check out a psychologist, whom may help these cope with their brand new problems or perhaps issues.
A lot of people always smoke realizing these types of unsafe conditions, because they believe that using tobacco offers benefits such as to reduce anxiety, nervousness, satisfaction, as well as pounds maintenance, convinced that stop smoking is tough and also won't end up being an easy task to attain. Those who quit smoking nonetheless have a very drastically reduce life expectations when compared with continuing people who smoke. Any time smokers could quit in a early age, it is a huge profit because they are exposing by themselves reasonably for you to fewer cigarettes.
For associated information http://www.ebay.com/itm/Electronic-...ltDomain_0&hash=item4602792550#ht_1301wt_1159
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Bear in mind that your current credit report doesn't incorporate information that is not related to your credit or even financial living. Thus, zero racial, nationality, sexual classification, marital position, and so on. will be taken into consideration any time calculating your credit score. This kind of technique previously referred to facts are strictly banned by restrictions and there are generally severe punishments for those who might use it for that purpose.
It can be worth every penny to scrub upwards credit score and enhance your credit ratings. Increased credit ratings mean you can preserve more income each month. On the web . larger interest levels for the acquisitions, have you thought to lift up your credit score? This can be achieved quickly with out an excessive amount of a price. If you use clear credit rating application, you will see your credit reports online and figure out just what can be begin on the road to greater credit ratings.The way to elevate credit scores is to get illegal copies of your credit report & scores. The Good Credit scoring Act enables consumers the opportunity obtain a duplicate of their report once every 12 months. In case you have utilised this chance up, but getting any free report a lot sooner when compared with twelve months, you'll have to invest in your credit reports. The only real some other opportunity to have a free credit report would be to happen to be denied credit history. If it is the case, speak to the credit canceling office and ask for a free copy. You must state that you happen to be denied credit, a truth that will end up in the credit report.
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Ok. Its a long long story so pls be patient to read this. I m so sorry to say it all started with just a touch. I wasnt born in the US. I have been here for only 4 years. My boyfriend came here 2 years ahead of me and got settled down before I came here as a student. Me and my boyfriend of 8 years used to hang out with his best friend of 20 years almost everyday since I got here. We had a great time together. More importantly, I was never attracted to him and I can positively say he never got attracted to me. I am so down at heel and I m just a girl of plain looks. But I can say that he does look up to me and my boyfriend's relationship. He is just a big time player in our eyes because he jumped from one girl friend to another very quickly, sometimes he wont be with a girl for more than 6 months. He is not handsome, but a good talker and usually end up with pretty chicks although not for long.
But we are all cool when he talked us about his love adventures and all this secret stuffs that is shared between only guys. So I think he also took me in as a sister/close friend. And every night after our hang outs, he would drive my bf home then he would always drive me home because he just lives at the end of my street. (He moved near my house 2 years after I got here). And my boyfriend is completely fine with this because everybody thinks me and this guy can be the last to fall for each other cuz we are that close and we are completely different types.
And for me and about my boyfriend, we have been together for this long so he is like my father, brother and a friend. I m just me when I m with him and I feel so comfortable and relaxed around him. He doesn't also notice if I put makeup on or put new shoes on and was never romantic. All he does is be there for me every time I need him and have a laugh together. He never tries to control me, trust me to certain extent and let me do whatever I want. And we rarely have things to fight about so everybody in our group look up to our relationship. But on the dark side, I think my boyfriend is a little ignorant. He rarely remember our special days, he never make me feel good with a flower or gifts and even kiss me on my lips. We kissed the first couple of years we got together then we just stopped kissing and showing passion and affections. He thinks this is cheesy stuff. So our relationship rarely have ups and downs. It was really stable.Sometimes my boyfriend mocks at his best friend who is going only after the hot girls who wont last long and go off with another guy. This guy knows exactly how to make chicks fall for him with sweet talks and occucationaly make them feel good with surprise parties or gifts that will make girls feel good. I just saw all these stuff and thought it was ok but may be at the back of my head I might be wanting those stuffs from a guy. But I just thought this is not my life. I was fine until that one day.
So, I was planning to go back to my country for 3 weeks for summer holidays. And my bf's best friend is going back home for a while. So my bf suggested us to take a flight together so we can take care of each other as there are a lot of transits. On the plane, we talked for hours and got bored and fell asleep on each other's shoulders. I didn't feel anything till then. But one hour before the last plane lands on our country, he held my hand suddenly and said he wished the plane was delayed. And I dont know what happened to me but I held back his hands tightly. When I get home, I have that weird butterfly effect feelings he gave me and felt so guilty. So I didn't call him for 5 days although I got his number. But I called him anyways on 5th day and we talked like 1 hr. From that time the vibe gets bigger and bigger and we end up texting like 18 hours a day and finally admitted we are vibing each other after 2 weeks. He just told me that all he met was just girls who wanted to have sex with him or girls after his status and wealth and he also was the same. He rarely have feelings like this to a girl and it was so unusual of him to completely fall for somebody especially me because he never noticed my existence as a girl. I replied I understood and I was pretty confident I will never fall for him until he held my hand on the plane. So we just decided to see we will date during the remaining 5 days that I was in my country and see how things will work out. I kinda talk to him we will have to go back to our normal life once we are back home. He just said we will see and ask me to trust him. It makes him really uncomfortable when he talks sweet to me because I know how he talks to girls and what he is thinking inside when he is using a particular sweet word. He said he really regrets talking everything in front of me. I just told him to relax and enjoy the moment we have.
And thats what we did. We enjoyed every single moment in those 5 best days of my life. I feel like I was living in a fairy tale. He constantly texts me all day all night and we would talk on the ph until 4 or 5 am in the morning. And I made love with him on 2 of our dates. I just couldn't resist him. He was too good to be true for me. On our dates, he would never let my hand go for even a sec. When eating, he would eat with only fork and held my hand with the other hand. He constantly kissed me on my lips like every time our eyes meet and he kissed me passionately whenever we're alone like when we are in a park or in an elevator. he said he is so so in love and he can't live without me anymore. On our last date before I went back to US, he cried in front of me. He said he never cried for losing a girl in his life. I was his first. And that he want me for his own and marry me if I accept him.
I was just shocked and said that I need to go back to my boyfriend. He said that if I leave my bf of 8 years when I get back to US, he will also break up with his current gf and take me in. He told me the plan to break up with our bf/gfs and stay single for a while then start our story. He told me how he wants his future with me and stuff. It looked so real to me.And he said stuffs he shouldnt say like bad things about my bf. Like he never actually liked him or things like how he didn't like the way my bf is taking me for granted.
Well, I trusted him so I accepted that I will break up with my boyfriend and wait for him to come back to US.
And I did. I know I broke my clueless boyfriend's heart. And I surprised the whole friend circle around us. But I decided to stay strong. And I waited for my new guy. Days turned to week and week turned to months. At first we called and talked on the ph, showered each other with emails and text me every time he gets internet. Then he started to get cold. He communicated with me less and less. Sometimes he would disappear for like 3 days. I just told myself he is busy with business. And he started to get annoyed when I called him out of the blue. He didn't have much stuff to talk to me anymore. But on the other hand, my poor ex bf of 8yrs wants me back desperately. He calls me, texts me and talk to me everyday to make sure I m ok, if I m feeling fine or what I m doing which makes me miss our old normal days back together before the summer holiday.
On the other hand, I m starting to grow problem with my new bf. He started to say stuff like he doesn't really like my very down at heel personality and he wants to try to change me into type of girls that he usually fall for. He wants me to stay pretty and sexy which is not my type at all. At first, I decided to try whatever he is telling and wanted to make him happy. But then after some time, I came to realize he is trying to change me and he can't take me as who I am. He is treating me nice but also treating me differently. He might think he is making me a better person but it kinda make me pulled away from him because I m starting to think he didn't love me for who I am. And also the fact that he has never found me beautiful or attractive just like he did to other girls made me feel small. He just told me I made him excited when I am around him. But never i look pretty or beautiful or stuff like that. We have that strong chemistry between us according to my feelings.
So to make the long story short, my ex asked me to take him back after a month of breaking up. So I made up with him without thinking and I told my new guy I just went back to my bf. He said he always knew I would finally end up with my bf. And that he had so many dreams with me but he will crush them. Ever since, he hasn't shown me any signs of interest and made any communication with me. But he came liked a couple of my statuses on facebook though. I dont know how to understand him. Right now he is still in my country and I have no idea when he is coming back. Every single memory reminded me of him and I cannot think of anything else but him. I broke up with this guy because I thought it was the right thing to do. But now as he is ignoring me, I totally wondered where is the guy who was all over me while we were dating. I m pretending like I dont care right now but I miss him all the time and I can't help remembering how he kissed me and how he showed his passion with me.
I am sure he is trying to move on and he will never start the topic over again but I dont trust myself if I will be all over him again if ever I see him when we are alone. Because everybody trust us that we are just like brother and sister. I am wondering if there is a way to cure this heart ache. And I tempted like every single night to text him to beg him that I really cant live without him and ask him to take me back but knowing that he never went back to his exes in his history, I dont wanna get embarrassed again.
But if there are chances and signs that he wants me back, I would definitely beg him and leave everything and my boyfriend behind.
I m now living with regret. Please help me and advice me how to get out of this mess.
But we are all cool when he talked us about his love adventures and all this secret stuffs that is shared between only guys. So I think he also took me in as a sister/close friend. And every night after our hang outs, he would drive my bf home then he would always drive me home because he just lives at the end of my street. (He moved near my house 2 years after I got here). And my boyfriend is completely fine with this because everybody thinks me and this guy can be the last to fall for each other cuz we are that close and we are completely different types.
And for me and about my boyfriend, we have been together for this long so he is like my father, brother and a friend. I m just me when I m with him and I feel so comfortable and relaxed around him. He doesn't also notice if I put makeup on or put new shoes on and was never romantic. All he does is be there for me every time I need him and have a laugh together. He never tries to control me, trust me to certain extent and let me do whatever I want. And we rarely have things to fight about so everybody in our group look up to our relationship. But on the dark side, I think my boyfriend is a little ignorant. He rarely remember our special days, he never make me feel good with a flower or gifts and even kiss me on my lips. We kissed the first couple of years we got together then we just stopped kissing and showing passion and affections. He thinks this is cheesy stuff. So our relationship rarely have ups and downs. It was really stable.Sometimes my boyfriend mocks at his best friend who is going only after the hot girls who wont last long and go off with another guy. This guy knows exactly how to make chicks fall for him with sweet talks and occucationaly make them feel good with surprise parties or gifts that will make girls feel good. I just saw all these stuff and thought it was ok but may be at the back of my head I might be wanting those stuffs from a guy. But I just thought this is not my life. I was fine until that one day.
So, I was planning to go back to my country for 3 weeks for summer holidays. And my bf's best friend is going back home for a while. So my bf suggested us to take a flight together so we can take care of each other as there are a lot of transits. On the plane, we talked for hours and got bored and fell asleep on each other's shoulders. I didn't feel anything till then. But one hour before the last plane lands on our country, he held my hand suddenly and said he wished the plane was delayed. And I dont know what happened to me but I held back his hands tightly. When I get home, I have that weird butterfly effect feelings he gave me and felt so guilty. So I didn't call him for 5 days although I got his number. But I called him anyways on 5th day and we talked like 1 hr. From that time the vibe gets bigger and bigger and we end up texting like 18 hours a day and finally admitted we are vibing each other after 2 weeks. He just told me that all he met was just girls who wanted to have sex with him or girls after his status and wealth and he also was the same. He rarely have feelings like this to a girl and it was so unusual of him to completely fall for somebody especially me because he never noticed my existence as a girl. I replied I understood and I was pretty confident I will never fall for him until he held my hand on the plane. So we just decided to see we will date during the remaining 5 days that I was in my country and see how things will work out. I kinda talk to him we will have to go back to our normal life once we are back home. He just said we will see and ask me to trust him. It makes him really uncomfortable when he talks sweet to me because I know how he talks to girls and what he is thinking inside when he is using a particular sweet word. He said he really regrets talking everything in front of me. I just told him to relax and enjoy the moment we have.
And thats what we did. We enjoyed every single moment in those 5 best days of my life. I feel like I was living in a fairy tale. He constantly texts me all day all night and we would talk on the ph until 4 or 5 am in the morning. And I made love with him on 2 of our dates. I just couldn't resist him. He was too good to be true for me. On our dates, he would never let my hand go for even a sec. When eating, he would eat with only fork and held my hand with the other hand. He constantly kissed me on my lips like every time our eyes meet and he kissed me passionately whenever we're alone like when we are in a park or in an elevator. he said he is so so in love and he can't live without me anymore. On our last date before I went back to US, he cried in front of me. He said he never cried for losing a girl in his life. I was his first. And that he want me for his own and marry me if I accept him.
I was just shocked and said that I need to go back to my boyfriend. He said that if I leave my bf of 8 years when I get back to US, he will also break up with his current gf and take me in. He told me the plan to break up with our bf/gfs and stay single for a while then start our story. He told me how he wants his future with me and stuff. It looked so real to me.And he said stuffs he shouldnt say like bad things about my bf. Like he never actually liked him or things like how he didn't like the way my bf is taking me for granted.
Well, I trusted him so I accepted that I will break up with my boyfriend and wait for him to come back to US.
And I did. I know I broke my clueless boyfriend's heart. And I surprised the whole friend circle around us. But I decided to stay strong. And I waited for my new guy. Days turned to week and week turned to months. At first we called and talked on the ph, showered each other with emails and text me every time he gets internet. Then he started to get cold. He communicated with me less and less. Sometimes he would disappear for like 3 days. I just told myself he is busy with business. And he started to get annoyed when I called him out of the blue. He didn't have much stuff to talk to me anymore. But on the other hand, my poor ex bf of 8yrs wants me back desperately. He calls me, texts me and talk to me everyday to make sure I m ok, if I m feeling fine or what I m doing which makes me miss our old normal days back together before the summer holiday.
On the other hand, I m starting to grow problem with my new bf. He started to say stuff like he doesn't really like my very down at heel personality and he wants to try to change me into type of girls that he usually fall for. He wants me to stay pretty and sexy which is not my type at all. At first, I decided to try whatever he is telling and wanted to make him happy. But then after some time, I came to realize he is trying to change me and he can't take me as who I am. He is treating me nice but also treating me differently. He might think he is making me a better person but it kinda make me pulled away from him because I m starting to think he didn't love me for who I am. And also the fact that he has never found me beautiful or attractive just like he did to other girls made me feel small. He just told me I made him excited when I am around him. But never i look pretty or beautiful or stuff like that. We have that strong chemistry between us according to my feelings.
So to make the long story short, my ex asked me to take him back after a month of breaking up. So I made up with him without thinking and I told my new guy I just went back to my bf. He said he always knew I would finally end up with my bf. And that he had so many dreams with me but he will crush them. Ever since, he hasn't shown me any signs of interest and made any communication with me. But he came liked a couple of my statuses on facebook though. I dont know how to understand him. Right now he is still in my country and I have no idea when he is coming back. Every single memory reminded me of him and I cannot think of anything else but him. I broke up with this guy because I thought it was the right thing to do. But now as he is ignoring me, I totally wondered where is the guy who was all over me while we were dating. I m pretending like I dont care right now but I miss him all the time and I can't help remembering how he kissed me and how he showed his passion with me.
I am sure he is trying to move on and he will never start the topic over again but I dont trust myself if I will be all over him again if ever I see him when we are alone. Because everybody trust us that we are just like brother and sister. I am wondering if there is a way to cure this heart ache. And I tempted like every single night to text him to beg him that I really cant live without him and ask him to take me back but knowing that he never went back to his exes in his history, I dont wanna get embarrassed again.
But if there are chances and signs that he wants me back, I would definitely beg him and leave everything and my boyfriend behind.
I m now living with regret. Please help me and advice me how to get out of this mess.
My best friend is moving to South Korea in a few months. He's had a horrible break-up with his fiancee and has decided it's time to move on. He's not from the area originally, but there's no jobs back home and his brother can get him a job out there.
I've been a bit of a mess since he told me. I know I have to let him go because he needs to get away... but realistically... I might never see him again. I've cried about it, I've got angry at him, and now I'm just trying to find acceptance because I can't really see any other way through it.
We've been so close since we met and I honestly believe that without him I wouldn't have been able to get back to anything resembling normality after the break-up with my ex, which happened just a few weeks before we met.
I'm so worried about him. He has Menieres which affects his hearing and balance, and he gets terribly depressed, and it's been me that's been his support when it all got bad.
He's lent me money and I've lent him an ear. He defines me. I know I define him.
When he found out he had Menieres and was going deaf in one ear, we sat and drank a bottle of vodka. Then we went out and did "deaf" voices all night (I know, I know, but he felt that because he's going deaf it's ok) and he carried a card everywhere saying "can I have a free drink, I'm deaf"...
There was the time he cut himself after a horrible argument with his fiancee. I went down and cleaned him and his flat up, tidied the place, sent him off for a sleep and went to buy him irn bru and a meatball panini.
More than once I've been barricaded into my flat in a fit of depression and he's lured me out and bought me drink all night until I've cheered up.
We've talked for seven hours solid about Thomas the Tank Engine.
He openly calls me "the other woman" and I call him my hero.
What the fuck am I going to do without him? If he was going home to Belfast I could get a ferry over to see him... but how the fuck do I get to South Korea if he needs me? What if I need him?
I think about what it'll be like when he's gone and it's like this horrible, dark, gaping void. It makes me sob my eyes out. But I can't make him stay here because right now he's fucking miserable.
He's the only guy since my ex that I've been able to get close to and trust.
I feel so miserable. I'm already lonely... and now he's off to travel... and I'm stuck here on my own...
It's not like I can stop him from going. Because I love my friend, I have to let him go. He might meet a girl that heals all the hurt that his fiancee heaped on him. I want the best for him, I truly do. But he's been so reliant on me that I worry that he'll struggle. I'm not being big headed, it's just a fact.
It's me he texts at 4am when he's drunk and feeling depressed. It's me he texts when he's lost on the tube and is freaking out. It's me he texts stupid pictures of himself wearing a fat controller costume. It me he sends videos of his friends back home doing stupid shit.
The times he wanted to die he said it was me that stopped him just by being there.
I don't know how I'm going to get by without him. It's not that I see him all the time, but just knowing he's always there if I need him has always been enough for me to get by. And I'm a better person for having met him because he bitched and moaned about certain aspects of my personality until I realised what negative aspects they were... and gradually over the years I've evolved and can even say that sometimes I'm happy.
He's always felt like it's him that's needed me and that he's been weak... but I'm starting to wonder if it's the other way around...
My best friend. What am I going to do? He'd be morto if he knew I was upset. I can never let onto him how sad I feel.
I've been a bit of a mess since he told me. I know I have to let him go because he needs to get away... but realistically... I might never see him again. I've cried about it, I've got angry at him, and now I'm just trying to find acceptance because I can't really see any other way through it.
We've been so close since we met and I honestly believe that without him I wouldn't have been able to get back to anything resembling normality after the break-up with my ex, which happened just a few weeks before we met.
I'm so worried about him. He has Menieres which affects his hearing and balance, and he gets terribly depressed, and it's been me that's been his support when it all got bad.
He's lent me money and I've lent him an ear. He defines me. I know I define him.
When he found out he had Menieres and was going deaf in one ear, we sat and drank a bottle of vodka. Then we went out and did "deaf" voices all night (I know, I know, but he felt that because he's going deaf it's ok) and he carried a card everywhere saying "can I have a free drink, I'm deaf"...
There was the time he cut himself after a horrible argument with his fiancee. I went down and cleaned him and his flat up, tidied the place, sent him off for a sleep and went to buy him irn bru and a meatball panini.
More than once I've been barricaded into my flat in a fit of depression and he's lured me out and bought me drink all night until I've cheered up.
We've talked for seven hours solid about Thomas the Tank Engine.
He openly calls me "the other woman" and I call him my hero.
What the fuck am I going to do without him? If he was going home to Belfast I could get a ferry over to see him... but how the fuck do I get to South Korea if he needs me? What if I need him?
I think about what it'll be like when he's gone and it's like this horrible, dark, gaping void. It makes me sob my eyes out. But I can't make him stay here because right now he's fucking miserable.
He's the only guy since my ex that I've been able to get close to and trust.
I feel so miserable. I'm already lonely... and now he's off to travel... and I'm stuck here on my own...
It's not like I can stop him from going. Because I love my friend, I have to let him go. He might meet a girl that heals all the hurt that his fiancee heaped on him. I want the best for him, I truly do. But he's been so reliant on me that I worry that he'll struggle. I'm not being big headed, it's just a fact.
It's me he texts at 4am when he's drunk and feeling depressed. It's me he texts when he's lost on the tube and is freaking out. It's me he texts stupid pictures of himself wearing a fat controller costume. It me he sends videos of his friends back home doing stupid shit.
The times he wanted to die he said it was me that stopped him just by being there.
I don't know how I'm going to get by without him. It's not that I see him all the time, but just knowing he's always there if I need him has always been enough for me to get by. And I'm a better person for having met him because he bitched and moaned about certain aspects of my personality until I realised what negative aspects they were... and gradually over the years I've evolved and can even say that sometimes I'm happy.
He's always felt like it's him that's needed me and that he's been weak... but I'm starting to wonder if it's the other way around...
My best friend. What am I going to do? He'd be morto if he knew I was upset. I can never let onto him how sad I feel.
One cannot be expected to continually keep guard over their homes with the only objective of preventing burglaries or break-ins. With a [link='http://homesecuritysystems-wirelessalarms.com']Alarm systems[/link] you can hope to achieve just that - a 24/7 system to watch over your home! Home alarm systems of today are far superior and more sophisticated than what they used to be a decade ago. Advances in alarm systems technologies today allow clients of home security systems to talk with the company's staff even though they are away from the system keypads located in their homes. And many systems don't even need you to have a land line anymore. Advances in wireless cell phones now allow you to interface with the alarm systems using your cell phone. Technology has also contributed in enhancing the functionality of home security systems.
The primary objective of home alarm systems is no longer limited to only monitoring home alarms. Their role has transcended far beyond merely monitoring the home for any incidents. With two-way voice communication a standard characteristic in modern alarm systems, they can be utilized to generate calls for medical assistance in the event that seniors living alone require help. Medical aid can be quickly rushed to the site within minutes of the home alarm company getting a call for help. Home alarm systems are active continually, with capabilities to do more than watch for illegal entry or medical calls. Alarm systems of today are designed to closely monitor for high levels of CO2 in the air and notify residents if there is a smoke or fire threat. If a fire does break out while you are at work or on vacation, the home security systems company can automatically alert the concerned fire services to respond. And while you are sound asleep, should a flood alert be detected, today's home alarms will diligently notify you of the danger so you can immediately take preventive action.
Today's home security systems are no longer reactive systems, sounding an alarm after a break in has occurred. With the help of motion detectors and infrared sensors, alarm systems can now proactively monitor a home for any abnormal or unauthorized movement. The home alarm systems will usually notify the homeowner when such movements are observed, and can also sound an intruder alarm. The sophisticated intelligence designed into modern alarm systems automatically allows them to sense whether unwanted movements might be human or caused by pets, thus avoiding a false alarm from being triggered. Part of the proactive approach to securing your home is the use of window decals and lawn signs by company's offering home alarms. When potential burglars see that your home is protected, they are more likely to leave you alone.
The primary objective of home alarm systems is no longer limited to only monitoring home alarms. Their role has transcended far beyond merely monitoring the home for any incidents. With two-way voice communication a standard characteristic in modern alarm systems, they can be utilized to generate calls for medical assistance in the event that seniors living alone require help. Medical aid can be quickly rushed to the site within minutes of the home alarm company getting a call for help. Home alarm systems are active continually, with capabilities to do more than watch for illegal entry or medical calls. Alarm systems of today are designed to closely monitor for high levels of CO2 in the air and notify residents if there is a smoke or fire threat. If a fire does break out while you are at work or on vacation, the home security systems company can automatically alert the concerned fire services to respond. And while you are sound asleep, should a flood alert be detected, today's home alarms will diligently notify you of the danger so you can immediately take preventive action.
Today's home security systems are no longer reactive systems, sounding an alarm after a break in has occurred. With the help of motion detectors and infrared sensors, alarm systems can now proactively monitor a home for any abnormal or unauthorized movement. The home alarm systems will usually notify the homeowner when such movements are observed, and can also sound an intruder alarm. The sophisticated intelligence designed into modern alarm systems automatically allows them to sense whether unwanted movements might be human or caused by pets, thus avoiding a false alarm from being triggered. Part of the proactive approach to securing your home is the use of window decals and lawn signs by company's offering home alarms. When potential burglars see that your home is protected, they are more likely to leave you alone.
a continuation..
Marriage is sacred here in Mindanao, but the manmade religious and/or civil ceremony is much less so. The commitment outweighs any other concern, legal or otherwise. Lest one imagine that by "commitment" I am referring to a promise, it is enshrined in action. A "commitment" to a woman can take the form of a house, property, business, or financial investment benefitting the girl and her family.
The country's powers that be love to sell a line of bullshit that has the country as some sort of Moral Majority circlejerk and buttfuck fiesta. Proudly noting that there is no abortion (at least legally), the government forgets to mention the hundreds of thousands of homeless , or otherwise unsupervised street children (out of an overall population of 12 Million)...Loudly intoning about a minimum age of 18 for marriage-and how even 25 year olds need both parents' written permission to walk down the aisle...while neglecting to discuss the more than 100,000 single mothers under the age of 18. The Philippines is no different than any other Southeast Asian nation. Glaring contradictions
are the rule of the day, but navigating these huge disparities can vex most any Westerner.
After the aforementioned Group Chat between Lovely, myself, her mother, and her eldest sister- the latter being in the US (see Part VIII)- Lovely and I began discussing our plans. Unlike most girls her age on Mindanao, she had been able to travel to not only the southern coast of Mindanao, but Cebu City, and even Cavite and Metro Manila on Luzon, thanks to her eldest sister's remittances. Still, she had never been out of the Philippines. Still, when asked
where she would like to live, she offered that it truly didnt
matter where, as long as she was with me.
Some might recall that even while still with Rizza, I had wanted to live in the Cambodian capital, Pnohm Penh. I had first arrived in Cambodia back in 1994, as the Khmer Rouge were finally pushed into the rainforests bordering Thailand, their original baliwick. At the time Poi Pet was nothing but a muddy field on the Thai border, filled with canvas tents courtesy of the hypocritical baby piddling United Nations. It took nearly 24 hours over (mostly) ox tracks to arrive in the marvelously preserved city. Although Cambodia had been through nearly thirty years of incessant warfare, the inner precincts of Pnohm Penh had been left unscathed, albeit badly tarnished by a programme of deliberate neglect by the Khmer Rouge, who ideological platform viewed urban environments as the epitome of all that was wrong in the world. Therefore, facades of buildings might be literally coming apart at the seams, and all innards might have been cannibalised for desperately needed hard currency but the city's wide boulevards, reminiscent of a mid-20th Century Paris and the Art Deco architecture to match (I have a deep passion for that genre), are almost all still there.
Although the city, and Cambodia as a whole, have changed in immeasurable ways since 1994, the city- for now anyway- remains the only locale within Southeast Asia where an opiate/opioid addict such as myself can live a life of relative ease. Police do not hassle foreign users, an entire district (Beong Keok aka The Lake) is left alone to exist in decadent squalor. One can sit on wooden decks belonging to various guest houses, watching Cambodians in dugouts as they harvest water lillies, a local delicacy, while chowing down on a slice of Happy Pizza, pizza with cannabis, sold by a handful of lakeside eateries.
For $5 a day you can get a very clean and very, very quiet room with private loo, ceiling fan, and colour TV with cable. If you are really on the flint, the average price for a room with no private loo nor cable TV is just $3. Meals? All you can eat Indian for $2, or a Western salad for $4. Transportation? $2 will get you and your group anywhere in the city via a tuktuk, the quinessential form of transport in that corner of Southeast Asia.
Cost efficiency is not really a factor at this stage of my life. I just find it a great place though I reckon a large part of my love affair with the city is its storied recent history as a junkie's paradise. Until 2006 you could walk into any large pharmacy and buy morphine over the counter. Of course, at $18 per ten extended release capsules, this at a time when that same amount of money could rent you a guesthouse room for a week. While the thrill of buying morphine as easily as Skittles might be a novelty on a two week look see, morphine really only existed as a novelty for virtually all users.
The real attraction, then and now, was the relatively pure #4 heroin from Burma (Mynnamar). In 1997, the first year I saw heroin in the capital, it cost a whopping $120 a gramme, a Cambodian Senator's monthly salary. The good news was that that gramme waas as pure as it gets, which for the Golden Triangle is almost always between 92 and 98%. Today prices are down two-thirds, but then so has purity- if you buy in the street.
When measured against any other Southeast Asian locale, Pnohm Pehn offers the best place to settle down for me and mine. So I told Lovely that, all things considered, I would have us live up in Cambodia. Her response, "Sure Daddy ko (my daddy), anywhere as long as I am next to you all the time." Sounded perfect to me but then the eldest sister had a meltdown in Maryland.
I opened up Lovely's Facebook page and then I noticed that the eldest sister had made an alarming statement while updating her "Status." Basically, she came right out and admitted how unhappy she is with her now 56 year old American husband. Her words were so poignant and emotional that I was honestly worried for her safety. I called Lovely and told her my concerns. Immediately the family contacted the eldest sister and by the enf of their conversation she had vowed to take her baby and return to Mindanao. The problem? The eldeat sister had not been back for a visit since October of 2010.
After thinking about the eldest sister's homesickness, I realised that I had overlooked an incredibly important consideration; IF I moved with Lovely to any foreign country, and failed to bring her home at least once a year, she will be just as depressed and miserable as her eldest sister. It was then that I realised that Lovely and I would have to live on Mindanao.
to be continued...
Marriage is sacred here in Mindanao, but the manmade religious and/or civil ceremony is much less so. The commitment outweighs any other concern, legal or otherwise. Lest one imagine that by "commitment" I am referring to a promise, it is enshrined in action. A "commitment" to a woman can take the form of a house, property, business, or financial investment benefitting the girl and her family.
The country's powers that be love to sell a line of bullshit that has the country as some sort of Moral Majority circlejerk and buttfuck fiesta. Proudly noting that there is no abortion (at least legally), the government forgets to mention the hundreds of thousands of homeless , or otherwise unsupervised street children (out of an overall population of 12 Million)...Loudly intoning about a minimum age of 18 for marriage-and how even 25 year olds need both parents' written permission to walk down the aisle...while neglecting to discuss the more than 100,000 single mothers under the age of 18. The Philippines is no different than any other Southeast Asian nation. Glaring contradictions
are the rule of the day, but navigating these huge disparities can vex most any Westerner.
After the aforementioned Group Chat between Lovely, myself, her mother, and her eldest sister- the latter being in the US (see Part VIII)- Lovely and I began discussing our plans. Unlike most girls her age on Mindanao, she had been able to travel to not only the southern coast of Mindanao, but Cebu City, and even Cavite and Metro Manila on Luzon, thanks to her eldest sister's remittances. Still, she had never been out of the Philippines. Still, when asked
where she would like to live, she offered that it truly didnt
matter where, as long as she was with me.
Some might recall that even while still with Rizza, I had wanted to live in the Cambodian capital, Pnohm Penh. I had first arrived in Cambodia back in 1994, as the Khmer Rouge were finally pushed into the rainforests bordering Thailand, their original baliwick. At the time Poi Pet was nothing but a muddy field on the Thai border, filled with canvas tents courtesy of the hypocritical baby piddling United Nations. It took nearly 24 hours over (mostly) ox tracks to arrive in the marvelously preserved city. Although Cambodia had been through nearly thirty years of incessant warfare, the inner precincts of Pnohm Penh had been left unscathed, albeit badly tarnished by a programme of deliberate neglect by the Khmer Rouge, who ideological platform viewed urban environments as the epitome of all that was wrong in the world. Therefore, facades of buildings might be literally coming apart at the seams, and all innards might have been cannibalised for desperately needed hard currency but the city's wide boulevards, reminiscent of a mid-20th Century Paris and the Art Deco architecture to match (I have a deep passion for that genre), are almost all still there.
Although the city, and Cambodia as a whole, have changed in immeasurable ways since 1994, the city- for now anyway- remains the only locale within Southeast Asia where an opiate/opioid addict such as myself can live a life of relative ease. Police do not hassle foreign users, an entire district (Beong Keok aka The Lake) is left alone to exist in decadent squalor. One can sit on wooden decks belonging to various guest houses, watching Cambodians in dugouts as they harvest water lillies, a local delicacy, while chowing down on a slice of Happy Pizza, pizza with cannabis, sold by a handful of lakeside eateries.
For $5 a day you can get a very clean and very, very quiet room with private loo, ceiling fan, and colour TV with cable. If you are really on the flint, the average price for a room with no private loo nor cable TV is just $3. Meals? All you can eat Indian for $2, or a Western salad for $4. Transportation? $2 will get you and your group anywhere in the city via a tuktuk, the quinessential form of transport in that corner of Southeast Asia.
Cost efficiency is not really a factor at this stage of my life. I just find it a great place though I reckon a large part of my love affair with the city is its storied recent history as a junkie's paradise. Until 2006 you could walk into any large pharmacy and buy morphine over the counter. Of course, at $18 per ten extended release capsules, this at a time when that same amount of money could rent you a guesthouse room for a week. While the thrill of buying morphine as easily as Skittles might be a novelty on a two week look see, morphine really only existed as a novelty for virtually all users.
The real attraction, then and now, was the relatively pure #4 heroin from Burma (Mynnamar). In 1997, the first year I saw heroin in the capital, it cost a whopping $120 a gramme, a Cambodian Senator's monthly salary. The good news was that that gramme waas as pure as it gets, which for the Golden Triangle is almost always between 92 and 98%. Today prices are down two-thirds, but then so has purity- if you buy in the street.
When measured against any other Southeast Asian locale, Pnohm Pehn offers the best place to settle down for me and mine. So I told Lovely that, all things considered, I would have us live up in Cambodia. Her response, "Sure Daddy ko (my daddy), anywhere as long as I am next to you all the time." Sounded perfect to me but then the eldest sister had a meltdown in Maryland.
I opened up Lovely's Facebook page and then I noticed that the eldest sister had made an alarming statement while updating her "Status." Basically, she came right out and admitted how unhappy she is with her now 56 year old American husband. Her words were so poignant and emotional that I was honestly worried for her safety. I called Lovely and told her my concerns. Immediately the family contacted the eldest sister and by the enf of their conversation she had vowed to take her baby and return to Mindanao. The problem? The eldeat sister had not been back for a visit since October of 2010.
After thinking about the eldest sister's homesickness, I realised that I had overlooked an incredibly important consideration; IF I moved with Lovely to any foreign country, and failed to bring her home at least once a year, she will be just as depressed and miserable as her eldest sister. It was then that I realised that Lovely and I would have to live on Mindanao.
to be continued...
a continuation...
After the sun rose the next morning Mario and his son roused themselves out of their drunken revelry and announced that we would be heading back into the interior, where our town, San Francisco- aka "San Franz"-sits. I was still sitting there talking to Lovely but of course, reluctantly, had no choice but to take my leave. Getting her cellphone number, and vowing to text each other, I climbed into the driver's seat of the Nissan-one of our SUVs- and took care of the driving since Mario could barely keep his eyes open.
Over the following two and a half weeks I found excuse after excuse to make my way back to the coast. Claiming I needed to buy morphine, despite literally.having five ounces and change...claiming I wanted to take a bigger role in dealing with our rice distributors and buyers...claiming that I wanted to check up on our ten-wheeler drivers...and yet I fooled noone, let alone myself. Still, it was well worth it as I became a regular fixture in Lovely's family home. As is almost always the case with Filipinos, after spending a few days with the family it was as if I had known them all forever.
By the end of that first week it was clear that Lovely considered me to be her boyfriend. By the middle of the second week we were chatting on Yahoo when she non-chalantly informed me that her mother and her eldest sister- the aforementioned Filipina living jn Maryland, in the US- wished to "speak" to Lovely and myself in a Group Chat. Nervously, knowing that her family was fully aware of my marriage to Rizza, I accepted the "Invite" and strapped on my helmet. Seconds after entering the fray, Lovely addressed both women and said, in English, "I would like to introduce Rachamim Ra'anan Ben Ami, the man I am going to marry." I dont know why I took her seriously with that opening gambit but serious she was. Her eldest sistet, after a pause of several seconds, expressed her shock but her happiness as well. Lovely's mother congratulated her daughter.
In the West, a 22 year old girl who has never had a boyfriend, and who less than two weeks after meeting a man definatively announces her intentions to marry him, would undoubtedky be written off as a pathetic basketcase. How much more for a girl who never even bothered to consult her paramour? Of course, all things considered, a 22 year old Western girl who had never even had a boyfriend would be perceived, at the very least, as damaged goods. Here in the Southern Philippines it is par for the course.
As I sat there dumbfounded, the three of them began planning an engagement party (first week of May) and of course, the wedding, for December of 2012 so as to facilitate the eldest sister's attendance and participation. Of course they are extremely optimistic since I am still married to Rizza and divorce is non-existent in the Philippines (unless one is a Muslim since they have a parallel legal code based entirely upon Shari'a, or, Islamic Jurisprudence, and of cpurse Islam has no qualms about permitting divorce).
The next week or so was spent hashing out that issue. A little known loophole exists in Philippine Law that allows foreign spouses to seek divorce in their country of origin
If the foreign spouse obtains the divorce, either they or their Filipino spouse can then petition the Philippine Courts to enter a Judgement of Recognition. If granted, the marriage is negated (nullified), if not actually granted a Judgement of Divorce. Issues such as Child Custody and Division of Property however, must then be remedied through civil actions in the Philippines, a torturously long and arduous process that could easily take several yeats (making Child Custody a moot issue).
We also considered simply doing a Legal Name Change (for me) in New York City. My American passport would then reflect this new name, thereby allowing me to commit.bigamy without fear of prosecution. Actually, the Name Change would be a redundant safety valve since the Philippines is full of people who marry several times over the course of a lifetime, since, as I previously noted, divorce is non-existent. Still, bigamy isnt something I aspire to. In fact, it amazed me that Lovely and her family could even consider such a move.
As it turns out, marriage here is almost always about appearances and preserving/saving face. That isnt to suggest that Filipinos undervalue the sanctity of marriage. Indeed, Filipinas at least truly believe in marrying a single time. Taking a view that commitment need not rest upon a piece of paper.
to be continued...
After the sun rose the next morning Mario and his son roused themselves out of their drunken revelry and announced that we would be heading back into the interior, where our town, San Francisco- aka "San Franz"-sits. I was still sitting there talking to Lovely but of course, reluctantly, had no choice but to take my leave. Getting her cellphone number, and vowing to text each other, I climbed into the driver's seat of the Nissan-one of our SUVs- and took care of the driving since Mario could barely keep his eyes open.
Over the following two and a half weeks I found excuse after excuse to make my way back to the coast. Claiming I needed to buy morphine, despite literally.having five ounces and change...claiming I wanted to take a bigger role in dealing with our rice distributors and buyers...claiming that I wanted to check up on our ten-wheeler drivers...and yet I fooled noone, let alone myself. Still, it was well worth it as I became a regular fixture in Lovely's family home. As is almost always the case with Filipinos, after spending a few days with the family it was as if I had known them all forever.
By the end of that first week it was clear that Lovely considered me to be her boyfriend. By the middle of the second week we were chatting on Yahoo when she non-chalantly informed me that her mother and her eldest sister- the aforementioned Filipina living jn Maryland, in the US- wished to "speak" to Lovely and myself in a Group Chat. Nervously, knowing that her family was fully aware of my marriage to Rizza, I accepted the "Invite" and strapped on my helmet. Seconds after entering the fray, Lovely addressed both women and said, in English, "I would like to introduce Rachamim Ra'anan Ben Ami, the man I am going to marry." I dont know why I took her seriously with that opening gambit but serious she was. Her eldest sistet, after a pause of several seconds, expressed her shock but her happiness as well. Lovely's mother congratulated her daughter.
In the West, a 22 year old girl who has never had a boyfriend, and who less than two weeks after meeting a man definatively announces her intentions to marry him, would undoubtedky be written off as a pathetic basketcase. How much more for a girl who never even bothered to consult her paramour? Of course, all things considered, a 22 year old Western girl who had never even had a boyfriend would be perceived, at the very least, as damaged goods. Here in the Southern Philippines it is par for the course.
As I sat there dumbfounded, the three of them began planning an engagement party (first week of May) and of course, the wedding, for December of 2012 so as to facilitate the eldest sister's attendance and participation. Of course they are extremely optimistic since I am still married to Rizza and divorce is non-existent in the Philippines (unless one is a Muslim since they have a parallel legal code based entirely upon Shari'a, or, Islamic Jurisprudence, and of cpurse Islam has no qualms about permitting divorce).
The next week or so was spent hashing out that issue. A little known loophole exists in Philippine Law that allows foreign spouses to seek divorce in their country of origin
If the foreign spouse obtains the divorce, either they or their Filipino spouse can then petition the Philippine Courts to enter a Judgement of Recognition. If granted, the marriage is negated (nullified), if not actually granted a Judgement of Divorce. Issues such as Child Custody and Division of Property however, must then be remedied through civil actions in the Philippines, a torturously long and arduous process that could easily take several yeats (making Child Custody a moot issue).
We also considered simply doing a Legal Name Change (for me) in New York City. My American passport would then reflect this new name, thereby allowing me to commit.bigamy without fear of prosecution. Actually, the Name Change would be a redundant safety valve since the Philippines is full of people who marry several times over the course of a lifetime, since, as I previously noted, divorce is non-existent. Still, bigamy isnt something I aspire to. In fact, it amazed me that Lovely and her family could even consider such a move.
As it turns out, marriage here is almost always about appearances and preserving/saving face. That isnt to suggest that Filipinos undervalue the sanctity of marriage. Indeed, Filipinas at least truly believe in marrying a single time. Taking a view that commitment need not rest upon a piece of paper.
to be continued...
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Few small pinchs of lactose or baking powder. Lactose is better.
Throw your BTH in like a small medicine bottle of any kind. Throw a few coins in there, and shake the hell out of the bottle. This breaks down the BT and mixes it with the cut. Don't add much cut at all, itll come out nice and snortable.
Few small pinchs of lactose or baking powder. Lactose is better.
Throw your BTH in like a small medicine bottle of any kind. Throw a few coins in there, and shake the hell out of the bottle. This breaks down the BT and mixes it with the cut. Don't add much cut at all, itll come out nice and snortable.
Our body can lose tissue or have damage caused to it during high stress activity such as exercise for losing weight or bodybuilding. To replenish depleted and damaged tissue and give themselves a boost in energy levels, dieters and athletes seek help from Whey proteins. The [link='http://wheyproteinlabs.com/best-whey-protein']best whey protein isolate[/link] is created as a by-product of the cheese manufacturing process. As a rich source of protein it is this unique quality that makes Whey the most sought after supplement by high endurance performers. High endurance activity tends to help us burn off a lot of calories. Some of the best Whey protein products help us reclaim lost and damaged cells caused by exercise and hyper activity, because of the amino acids and nutrients they have. After vigorous weight loss exercises, the best Whey protein for weight loss can help rebuild the cells that we tear or lose while exercising. What is the best Whey protein for weight loss?, you might ask Well, the best Whey protein comes in a number of forms, including powder, energy bars and liquid drinks and shakes. And to make them even more palatable, they are available in various flavors to suit ones craving. Some of the best Whey proteins for weight loss are now conveniently available through websites offering multiple Whey-based recipes.
But the truth is that proteins are also available through a number of the more commonly known foods such as nuts, beans, eggs, fish and meats. And as a result many a weight watcher wonders: What's best, Whey protein or conventional foods?. Our bodies are designed around a pre-defined process to digest foods and extract proteins needed to heal, build and grow damaged or lost tissue. Meats, fish, eggs and other conventional foods take up to 90 minutes to digest. Designed specifically for dieters and extreme sport people, the best Whey protein for weight loss can cut that time to under 30 minutes! The next question might be: What is the best Whey protein? Well, some of the best whey protein available today comes in the form of energy drinks and shakes. You may now be tempted to use these drinks frequently as a tool to help you lose weight.
Restraint and moderation are called for in the use of the best Whey protein for weight loss, even if they are deemed suitable as a source of protein for you. If you do not exercise strenuously or follow a tough physical workout, then maybe consuming Whey proteins might not be suitable for you. You may opt to eat healthier and make other lifestyle modifications instead of extreme exercise and turning to the best whey protein. The question to ask is what is the best whey protein for you? And the most appropriate response is Consult with your dietician or weight loss therapist. Since many of these Whey protein supplements do not have rigorous Food and Drug Administration (FDA) oversight applied to them, it's best to consult with a professional for specific recommendations.
But the truth is that proteins are also available through a number of the more commonly known foods such as nuts, beans, eggs, fish and meats. And as a result many a weight watcher wonders: What's best, Whey protein or conventional foods?. Our bodies are designed around a pre-defined process to digest foods and extract proteins needed to heal, build and grow damaged or lost tissue. Meats, fish, eggs and other conventional foods take up to 90 minutes to digest. Designed specifically for dieters and extreme sport people, the best Whey protein for weight loss can cut that time to under 30 minutes! The next question might be: What is the best Whey protein? Well, some of the best whey protein available today comes in the form of energy drinks and shakes. You may now be tempted to use these drinks frequently as a tool to help you lose weight.
Restraint and moderation are called for in the use of the best Whey protein for weight loss, even if they are deemed suitable as a source of protein for you. If you do not exercise strenuously or follow a tough physical workout, then maybe consuming Whey proteins might not be suitable for you. You may opt to eat healthier and make other lifestyle modifications instead of extreme exercise and turning to the best whey protein. The question to ask is what is the best whey protein for you? And the most appropriate response is Consult with your dietician or weight loss therapist. Since many of these Whey protein supplements do not have rigorous Food and Drug Administration (FDA) oversight applied to them, it's best to consult with a professional for specific recommendations.
Ive been thinking about my drug use alot lately. I have come to the conclusion that alot of my drug use is situational because when things are going good and i have things to do i do tend to use less drugs. But when i am stuck in this shitty town with nothing to do, noone to talk to besides my parents and the occasional acquaintance, no chance of meeting a woman at all, etc, etc what else is there to do besides use drugs to numb it out?
These days i don't drink and i have not done any coke or any amphetamines in a good while. I still have my opiate and benzo scripts and i am still struggling with opiate addiction abit. More or less i am trying to keep opiate use to prescribed levels for pain but unfortunately i don't always succeed in that![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
. The clonazepam is not a problem for me since i haven't had to increase my dose since maybe 2007 and i never run out early. But i mix it in with my morphine and gabapentin and some diphenhydramine to give me abit of a high. Also i take seroquel to help my bipolar and that thankfully helps to keep me sedated for abit and not freak out. It has a shitty side effect on me sometimes that i don't like (fucking night sweats! 
) but my insurance only covers that and risperidone and i don't know if i am too keen on trying risperdal again. I could try a typical anti-psychotic but the only one Ive ever had is chlorpromazine (Thorazine/Largactil) and although i didn't find it to be too bad i don't know if taking it regularly would be the best idea. My psych meds which are lamotrigine, clonazepam, bupropion and seroquel do help to keep my drug use down especially when it comes to coke cravings. Not much point in doing coke if i am on 300-400mg's of seroquel along with 300mg's of wellbutrin. The seroquel stops my brain from racing over like a hamster on speed running in a wheel so that is atleast something.
My drug use is also definitely tied to my moods. I'm all to quick to take extra opiates if i am feeling miserably depressed or to calm me down abit if I'm manic. If I'm stable and actually happy i tend to use alot less drugs but those moments are far and few between
. I just hope that i can get to go live with my g/f soon so i can hopefully relax for the first time in fucking ages. My heart will no doubt be thankful to be in a low stress environment . I would just like to see if my stress levels going down would help alot or a little.
These days i don't drink and i have not done any coke or any amphetamines in a good while. I still have my opiate and benzo scripts and i am still struggling with opiate addiction abit. More or less i am trying to keep opiate use to prescribed levels for pain but unfortunately i don't always succeed in that
. The clonazepam is not a problem for me since i haven't had to increase my dose since maybe 2007 and i never run out early. But i mix it in with my morphine and gabapentin and some diphenhydramine to give me abit of a high. Also i take seroquel to help my bipolar and that thankfully helps to keep me sedated for abit and not freak out. It has a shitty side effect on me sometimes that i don't like (fucking night sweats! ) but my insurance only covers that and risperidone and i don't know if i am too keen on trying risperdal again. I could try a typical anti-psychotic but the only one Ive ever had is chlorpromazine (Thorazine/Largactil) and although i didn't find it to be too bad i don't know if taking it regularly would be the best idea. My psych meds which are lamotrigine, clonazepam, bupropion and seroquel do help to keep my drug use down especially when it comes to coke cravings. Not much point in doing coke if i am on 300-400mg's of seroquel along with 300mg's of wellbutrin. The seroquel stops my brain from racing over like a hamster on speed running in a wheel so that is atleast something.My drug use is also definitely tied to my moods. I'm all to quick to take extra opiates if i am feeling miserably depressed or to calm me down abit if I'm manic. If I'm stable and actually happy i tend to use alot less drugs but those moments are far and few between
. I just hope that i can get to go live with my g/f soon so i can hopefully relax for the first time in fucking ages. My heart will no doubt be thankful to be in a low stress environment . I would just like to see if my stress levels going down would help alot or a little.
Drugneed.com is a Growing Online Health Store for Health Care Products , Supplements | health Care & Fitness Products Online , Diabetic Products, Baby & Beauty , Buy vitamins Online, Nutrition, Personal Care, Sexual Products, Health Products Online, Health Products, health and Fitness, Health Care Products, health supplements, weight loss product, shop online on | online shop website: Drugneed.com.
Products Name : Sona Chandi Healthy And Fair Baby Massage Oil 50ml (Himani)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
USD : $ 0.57
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Shipping Time : 9-10 Days
Manufacturer : HIMANI LTD.-KOLLKATTA
Free Ship : No
Revolutionary baby massage oil with triple action power.
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Online Pharmacy India, Shop for Non prescription drugs, vitamins, baby care, skin & beauty care, personal, Womens Health, Ments Health, HOme Medical, Dient and Neutrition,Ayurvedic, Disinfectant, Baby & Child, Beauty Diet & Nutrition, Home Medical, Medicine Cabinet, Personal Care, Sexual Health, Skin Care, Vitamins, Mens Health, Womens Health Pesticide /Mosquito and more at drugneed.com.
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Products Name : Sona Chandi Healthy And Fair Baby Massage Oil 50ml (Himani)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
USD : $ 0.57
GBP : £ 0.41
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 9-10 Days
Manufacturer : HIMANI LTD.-KOLLKATTA
Free Ship : No
Revolutionary baby massage oil with triple action power.
For glowing and fairer skin. Herbal for protection
Himani Sona Chandi Healthy & Fair Baby Massage Oil with the goodness of gold, silver and kesar is the world’s first baby massage oil which promises the additional benefit of fairness apart from health. It contains saffron, almond along with 17 other herbs and this oil is a unique mixture of rare and precious oils namely almond, olive, til, coconut. Clinical researches prove that regular use of this oil not only makes baby healthy but also makes baby fair in just 6 weeks.The ingredients Gold and Silver have extraordinary beneficial power for the child's skin and health. It is 100%
Online Pharmacy India, Shop for Non prescription drugs, vitamins, baby care, skin & beauty care, personal, Womens Health, Ments Health, HOme Medical, Dient and Neutrition,Ayurvedic, Disinfectant, Baby & Child, Beauty Diet & Nutrition, Home Medical, Medicine Cabinet, Personal Care, Sexual Health, Skin Care, Vitamins, Mens Health, Womens Health Pesticide /Mosquito and more at drugneed.com.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Drugneed.com is a Growing Online Health Store for Health Care Products , Supplements | health Care & Fitness Products Online , Diabetic Products, Baby & Beauty , Buy vitamins Online, Nutrition, Personal Care, Sexual Products, Health Products Online, Health Products, health and Fitness, Health Care Products, health supplements, weight loss product, shop online on | online shop website: Drugneed.com.
Products Name : Sona Chandi Healthy And Fair Baby Massage Oil 50ml (Himani)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
USD : $ 0.57
GBP : £ 0.41
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 9-10 Days
Manufacturer : HIMANI LTD.-KOLLKATTA
Free Ship : No
Revolutionary baby massage oil with triple action power.
For glowing and fairer skin. Herbal for protection
Himani Sona Chandi Healthy & Fair Baby Massage Oil with the goodness of gold, silver and kesar is the world’s first baby massage oil which promises the additional benefit of fairness apart from health. It contains saffron, almond along with 17 other herbs and this oil is a unique mixture of rare and precious oils namely almond, olive, til, coconut. Clinical researches prove that regular use of this oil not only makes baby healthy but also makes baby fair in just 6 weeks.The ingredients Gold and Silver have extraordinary beneficial power for the child's skin and health. It is 100%
Online Pharmacy India, Shop for Non prescription drugs, vitamins, baby care, skin & beauty care, personal, Womens Health, Ments Health, HOme Medical, Dient and Neutrition,Ayurvedic, Disinfectant, Baby & Child, Beauty Diet & Nutrition, Home Medical, Medicine Cabinet, Personal Care, Sexual Health, Skin Care, Vitamins, Mens Health, Womens Health Pesticide /Mosquito and more at drugneed.com.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Products Name : Sona Chandi Healthy And Fair Baby Massage Oil 50ml (Himani)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
USD : $ 0.57
GBP : £ 0.41
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 9-10 Days
Manufacturer : HIMANI LTD.-KOLLKATTA
Free Ship : No
Revolutionary baby massage oil with triple action power.
For glowing and fairer skin. Herbal for protection
Himani Sona Chandi Healthy & Fair Baby Massage Oil with the goodness of gold, silver and kesar is the world’s first baby massage oil which promises the additional benefit of fairness apart from health. It contains saffron, almond along with 17 other herbs and this oil is a unique mixture of rare and precious oils namely almond, olive, til, coconut. Clinical researches prove that regular use of this oil not only makes baby healthy but also makes baby fair in just 6 weeks.The ingredients Gold and Silver have extraordinary beneficial power for the child's skin and health. It is 100%
Online Pharmacy India, Shop for Non prescription drugs, vitamins, baby care, skin & beauty care, personal, Womens Health, Ments Health, HOme Medical, Dient and Neutrition,Ayurvedic, Disinfectant, Baby & Child, Beauty Diet & Nutrition, Home Medical, Medicine Cabinet, Personal Care, Sexual Health, Skin Care, Vitamins, Mens Health, Womens Health Pesticide /Mosquito and more at drugneed.com.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Drugneed.com is a Growing Online Health Store for Health Care Products , Supplements | health Care & Fitness Products Online , Diabetic Products, Baby & Beauty , Buy vitamins Online, Nutrition, Personal Care, Sexual Products, Health Products Online, Health Products, health and Fitness, Health Care Products, health supplements, weight loss product, shop online on | online shop website: Drugneed.com. Our shopping site Drugneed.com
Products Name : Caticare Antiseptic Solution-30 ML (West -Coast)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
Our Price : Rs. 24.00
USD : $ 0.46
GBP : £ 0.33
Discount : 20%
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 1 Week
Manufacturer : WESTCOAST PHARMACEUTICALS WORKS
Free Ship : Yes
Prophylaxis against infection in hospital and surgery procedures Preparation of skin and mucous membranes prior to surgery Post-operative application to protect against infection Treatment of infection skin condition. Applied for herpes, Moniliasis, Trichomonasis
Apply once daily around the would. Crush once between the thumb and forefinger at the dot located at the center of the swab. Gently squeeze swab to apply to the desired area.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Buy OTC Products online at http://www.drugneed.com/otc-cabinet-c-7.html
Buy Sugar free, diabetic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/diabetic-care-c-1994.html
Products Name : Caticare Antiseptic Solution-30 ML (West -Coast)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
Our Price : Rs. 24.00
USD : $ 0.46
GBP : £ 0.33
Discount : 20%
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 1 Week
Manufacturer : WESTCOAST PHARMACEUTICALS WORKS
Free Ship : Yes
Prophylaxis against infection in hospital and surgery procedures Preparation of skin and mucous membranes prior to surgery Post-operative application to protect against infection Treatment of infection skin condition. Applied for herpes, Moniliasis, Trichomonasis
Apply once daily around the would. Crush once between the thumb and forefinger at the dot located at the center of the swab. Gently squeeze swab to apply to the desired area.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Buy OTC Products online at http://www.drugneed.com/otc-cabinet-c-7.html
Buy Sugar free, diabetic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/diabetic-care-c-1994.html
Drugneed.com is a Growing Online Health Store for Health Care Products , Supplements | health Care & Fitness Products Online , Diabetic Products, Baby & Beauty , Buy vitamins Online, Nutrition, Personal Care, Sexual Products, Health Products Online, Health Products, health and Fitness, Health Care Products, health supplements, weight loss product, shop online on | online shop website: Drugneed.com. Our shopping site Drugneed.com
Products Name : Caticare Antiseptic Solution-30 ML (West -Coast)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
Our Price : Rs. 24.00
USD : $ 0.46
GBP : £ 0.33
Discount : 20%
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 1 Week
Manufacturer : WESTCOAST PHARMACEUTICALS WORKS
Free Ship : Yes
Prophylaxis against infection in hospital and surgery procedures Preparation of skin and mucous membranes prior to surgery Post-operative application to protect against infection Treatment of infection skin condition. Applied for herpes, Moniliasis, Trichomonasis
Apply once daily around the would. Crush once between the thumb and forefinger at the dot located at the center of the swab. Gently squeeze swab to apply to the desired area.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Buy OTC Products online at http://www.drugneed.com/otc-cabinet-c-7.html
Products Name : Caticare Antiseptic Solution-30 ML (West -Coast)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
Our Price : Rs. 24.00
USD : $ 0.46
GBP : £ 0.33
Discount : 20%
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 1 Week
Manufacturer : WESTCOAST PHARMACEUTICALS WORKS
Free Ship : Yes
Prophylaxis against infection in hospital and surgery procedures Preparation of skin and mucous membranes prior to surgery Post-operative application to protect against infection Treatment of infection skin condition. Applied for herpes, Moniliasis, Trichomonasis
Apply once daily around the would. Crush once between the thumb and forefinger at the dot located at the center of the swab. Gently squeeze swab to apply to the desired area.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Buy OTC Products online at http://www.drugneed.com/otc-cabinet-c-7.html
Drugneed.com is a Growing Online Health Store for Health Care Products , Supplements | health Care & Fitness Products Online , Diabetic Products, Baby & Beauty , Buy vitamins Online, Nutrition, Personal Care, Sexual Products, Health Products Online, Health Products, health and Fitness, Health Care Products, health supplements, weight loss product, shop online on | online shop website: Drugneed.com.
Products Name : Baidyanath Balamrit Syrup-200 ml-(Baidyanath)
MRP : Rs. 61.00
USD : $ 1.36
GBP : £ 0.83
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 9-10 Days
Manufacturer : BAIDYANATH AYURVED BHAVAN LTD
Free Ship : No
FOR CHILDREN UP TO 12 YEARS ,1 ML TO 5 ML ACCORDING TO AGE, THRICE A DAY, OR AS DIRECTED BY THE PHYSICIAN. Nutritive, tonic and antiricket.Used inrickets, indigestion & relieves cough and cold in children
FOR CHILDREN UP TO 12 YEARS ,1 ML TO 5 ML ACCORDING TO AGE, THRICE A DAY, OR AS DIRECTED BY THE PHYSICIAN.
Online Pharmacy India, Shop for Non prescription drugs, vitamins, baby care, skin & beauty care, personal, Womens Health, Ments Health,HOme Medical, Dient and Neutrition,Ayurvedic, Disinfectant, Baby & Child, Beauty Diet & Nutrition, Home Medical, Medicine Cabinet, Personal Care, Sexual Health, Skin Care, Vitamins, Mens Health, Womens Health Pesticide /Mosquito and more at drugneed.com.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Products Name : Baidyanath Balamrit Syrup-200 ml-(Baidyanath)
MRP : Rs. 61.00
USD : $ 1.36
GBP : £ 0.83
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 9-10 Days
Manufacturer : BAIDYANATH AYURVED BHAVAN LTD
Free Ship : No
FOR CHILDREN UP TO 12 YEARS ,1 ML TO 5 ML ACCORDING TO AGE, THRICE A DAY, OR AS DIRECTED BY THE PHYSICIAN. Nutritive, tonic and antiricket.Used inrickets, indigestion & relieves cough and cold in children
FOR CHILDREN UP TO 12 YEARS ,1 ML TO 5 ML ACCORDING TO AGE, THRICE A DAY, OR AS DIRECTED BY THE PHYSICIAN.
Online Pharmacy India, Shop for Non prescription drugs, vitamins, baby care, skin & beauty care, personal, Womens Health, Ments Health,HOme Medical, Dient and Neutrition,Ayurvedic, Disinfectant, Baby & Child, Beauty Diet & Nutrition, Home Medical, Medicine Cabinet, Personal Care, Sexual Health, Skin Care, Vitamins, Mens Health, Womens Health Pesticide /Mosquito and more at drugneed.com.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Drugneed.com is a Growing Online Health Store for Health Care Products , Supplements | health Care & Fitness Products Online , Diabetic Products, Baby & Beauty , Buy vitamins Online, Nutrition, Personal Care, Sexual Products, Health Products Online, Health Products, health and Fitness, Health Care Products, health supplements, weight loss product, shop online on | online shop website: Drugneed.com.
Products Name : Caticare Antiseptic Solution-30 ML (West -Coast)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
Our Price : Rs. 24.00
USD : $ 0.46
GBP : £ 0.33
Discount : 20%
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 1 Week
Manufacturer : WESTCOAST PHARMACEUTICALS WORKS
Free Ship : Yes
Prophylaxis against infection in hospital and surgery procedures Preparation of skin and mucous membranes prior to surgery Post-operative application to protect against infection Treatment of infection skin condition. Applied for herpes, Moniliasis, Trichomonasis
Apply once daily around the would. Crush once between the thumb and forefinger at the dot located at the center of the swab. Gently squeeze swab to apply to the desired area.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Buy OTC Products online at http://www.drugneed.com/otc-cabinet-c-7.html
Buy Sugar free, diabetic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/diabetic-care-c-1994.html
Products Name : Caticare Antiseptic Solution-30 ML (West -Coast)
MRP : Rs. 30.00
Our Price : Rs. 24.00
USD : $ 0.46
GBP : £ 0.33
Discount : 20%
In Stock : Yes
Shipping Time : 1 Week
Manufacturer : WESTCOAST PHARMACEUTICALS WORKS
Free Ship : Yes
Prophylaxis against infection in hospital and surgery procedures Preparation of skin and mucous membranes prior to surgery Post-operative application to protect against infection Treatment of infection skin condition. Applied for herpes, Moniliasis, Trichomonasis
Apply once daily around the would. Crush once between the thumb and forefinger at the dot located at the center of the swab. Gently squeeze swab to apply to the desired area.
Or call us at + 91-9909005694,+91-9909005695 for instant support.
Our office address : D.F.Pharmacy Ltd.
Meldi Estate,
Near Prasang Party Plot,
Opp. Sola Bhagwat,
Sayona City Road,
Gota, Ahmedabad-382481,
Gujarat, (India).
Email us your requirements at [email protected] , [email protected] , [email protected]
Buy Aryuvedic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/ayurvedic-c-1875.html
Buy OTC Products online at http://www.drugneed.com/otc-cabinet-c-7.html
Buy Sugar free, diabetic products online at http://www.drugneed.com/diabetic-care-c-1994.html