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MDMA Recovery (Stories & Support - 7) [ALL LTC posts go here]

1exxocs said:
Has anybody ever recovered from the anhedonia, ive gone through most if not all of the recovery stories and nobody really mentions having anhedonia and it going away. im pretty hopeless right now so any help would really be appreciated.
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Aw yeah, I did! Working memory and anhedonia were the last persistent symptoms... Well, you'll need to rewire your brain like a baby, the thing is to pay attention to every stumula and encourage it. I remember noticing preferring or enjoying specific things. If before they gave me 9/10 joy, then they'll be 2/10, but I kept doing them. My advice is to address your stress in life, that's what helped me the most. This insane burnout I had was causing a whole fiesta of issues
 
Hello everyone.
Just have a quick Q

I’m coming up to 3 months and most if not all symptoms are gone, except maybe it being a little harder to get up in the morning.

The one persistent thing I’m seeing is the inability to drink alcohol. If I drink even just 1 beer I’m fucked for the next 3 days by a resurgence of symptoms. Since I’m so close to baseline I just think well I’m okay now let me try a drink and see what happens, and it fucks me up every time.

As sad as it sounds a lot of the social activities with my friends involves drinking and i just feel super bored sitting there with a red bull/coke…

Anyone that’s recovered how long did you wait to drink again?
 
Hello everyone,

I have been lurking inside this forum for about 14 months now.
For me the LTC doesn’t seem to improve one bit by I try to stay positive during all of this. I think it is time to tell my story.

So for me it happened 14 months ago, around christmas time in 2020. One evening I had a couple of beers a little bit of mdma and a lot of 3mmc. I can’t really tell you how much I actually took, because I was already pretty tipsy from the alcohol when it all happened so my memory of this evening is pretty vague.

The high itself was pretty good but during the high I already had problems with finding words during conversations and had a hard time doing anything else but look at my phone.

The morning after the roll I woke up and instantly felt that something was not quite right. I had a massive headache and I had weird glowing yellow spots in my vision. At first I thought that these were just symptoms from a normal comedown and that they would go away after a couple of days.

The thing is that most of the symptoms went away like the yellow spots and the heavy headache but there were a lot of other symptoms that plagued me.

14 months later and not a single one of these symptoms improved, I tried ssri’s even different type of depression medication like clomipramime

These are my symptoms that I still suffer from nowadays.

-Flu like symptoms: sometimes it feels like my skull/brain is literally burning, it feels almost like a bad fever but it comes and goes.
Also my entire temperature regulation went to shit, I often have these flu like chills that come from the inside of my bones it really feels like a flu.

-Bad long and short term memory,
I often forget stuff that I have just read and I also forget names/words during conversations that I have known my whole life.

-Time is distorted: I don’t know if something happened yesterday or 2 weeks ago etc. The entirety of the past feels the same to me now.

-DPDR: I lost my personality and everything that made me, me. The world seems fake and I feel like an actor.

-Depression/Anhedonia: I never feel the motivation to do anything the only thing I can manage to do is search the internet obsessively everyday. I don’t have emotions nor feelings. The entire world seems black and grey like something about the way I view the world got destroyed. Everything feels different.

Sleep: I lost the ability to feel tired/sleep. If I can get to sleep it usually isn’t a fulfilling sleep I am inbetween a state of sleep and being awake at the same time and I wake uo numerous times during the night. This means I also lost the ability to take short naps, I can go to work for the entirety of the day and still not feel tired afterwards.

I hope things will improve for me overtime but looking at my current timeline that doesn’t seem that likely at all.

Hopefully someone will read my story, my pm’s are always open to everyone if you need help or you want to give me advice.

Kind regards,
Benzammi
 
Benzammi said:
Hello everyone,

I have been lurking inside this forum for about 14 months now.
For me the LTC doesn’t seem to improve one bit by I try to stay positive during all of this. I think it is time to tell my story.

So for me it happened 14 months ago, around christmas time in 2020. One evening I had a couple of beers a little bit of mdma and a lot of 3mmc. I can’t really tell you how much I actually took, because I was already pretty tipsy from the alcohol when it all happened so my memory of this evening is pretty vague.

The high itself was pretty good but during the high I already had problems with finding words during conversations and had a hard time doing anything else but look at my phone.

The morning after the roll I woke up and instantly felt that something was not quite right. I had a massive headache and I had weird glowing yellow spots in my vision. At first I thought that these were just symptoms from a normal comedown and that they would go away after a couple of days.

The thing is that most of the symptoms went away like the yellow spots and the heavy headache but there were a lot of other symptoms that plagued me.

14 months later and not a single one of these symptoms improved, I tried ssri’s even different type of depression medication like clomipramime

These are my symptoms that I still suffer from nowadays.

-Flu like symptoms: sometimes it feels like my skull/brain is literally burning, it feels almost like a bad fever but it comes and goes.
Also my entire temperature regulation went to shit, I often have these flu like chills that come from the inside of my bones it really feels like a flu.

-Bad long and short term memory,
I often forget stuff that I have just read and I also forget names/words during conversations that I have known my whole life.

-Time is distorted: I don’t know if something happened yesterday or 2 weeks ago etc. The entirety of the past feels the same to me now.

-DPDR: I lost my personality and everything that made me, me. The world seems fake and I feel like an actor.

-Depression/Anhedonia: I never feel the motivation to do anything the only thing I can manage to do is search the internet obsessively everyday. I don’t have emotions nor feelings. The entire world seems black and grey like something about the way I view the world got destroyed. Everything feels different.

Sleep: I lost the ability to feel tired/sleep. If I can get to sleep it usually isn’t a fulfilling sleep I am inbetween a state of sleep and being awake at the same time and I wake uo numerous times during the night. This means I also lost the ability to take short naps, I can go to work for the entirety of the day and still not feel tired afterwards.

I hope things will improve for me overtime but looking at my current timeline that doesn’t seem that likely at all.

Hopefully someone will read my story, my pm’s are always open to everyone if you need help or you want to give me advice.

Kind regards,
Benzammi
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Hey man, sorry to hear that you are going through those symptoms.

First of, speak with a medical professional and get checked, if you haven´t already.

From my experience: try to get your sleep in order. sleep is where all the healing happens, so whatever causes your issues..once you get 7,5+ hours of good sleep on a regular basis, your situation should start to improve.

To improve sleep and health in general, one should go outside in the morning and be exposed to sunlight. At the sime time, one should avoid artificial lights in the evening as much as possible. The bed room should be dark and cool. Go to bed roughly same time every day. Eat enough, especially protein, in the evening. If these measures don´t help, you should see a doctor about your sleep.

Try to eat mostly nourishing whole foods and move your body in some way every day. Vitamin D, Omega 3 and Magnesium can also be helpful. Otherwise just be patient man and hang on, you will be fine.
 
Hello. I'm brand new to this forum. I went browsing on reddit for similar experiences but nothing to relate to. It seems like this is the place to look at.

22 days ago (Exactly on the 4th of March 2022) me and a couple of friends took mdma, and believe me, it was far far far too much. Way beyond anything recommended. We estimate the amount that I took to be around 350mg-500mg in total that night. They were punisher pills, if anyone knows anything about them. My friends took even more which is the scariest part, but they dont have any negative effects to this day (at least not mentally or anything).

The day after i took mdma, I felt different, like in a different world, a bit tired but very chill and positive. I went out drinking that night, and had like 10 beers or so and got super drunk.

I arrived home and had a long night sleep and surprisingly enough I did not encounter a typical hangover this day. I felt really strange and weird that day, but i felt like all I really needed was some rest and sleep. The following days were dreadfu, filled with anxiety, paranoia, depression, suicidal thoughts, panic attacks, cognitive dysfunctions, dizziness, derealization etc...

To this day I still suffer massively and face these things every day:

- Depression, low mood
- Anxiety
- Lack of motivation
- Isolation from social life
- Suicidal thoughts
- The fear of never ever being normal again
- Confusion
- Trouble concentrating
- Trouble with memory, coordination, control of limbs etc... It's like parkinsonism, but mild (maybe dragging it out a bit)
- Derealization/dpdr
- Blurry vision (although i have poor eyesight beforehand=

Basically every day is a battle, the thought of going to work and getting things done is extremely tough, and i'm very difficult to be around for my friends and family. It feels like im losing them. Even working out is strange, it doesnt really make me feel that better other than staying shape. Somehow I make it through the day, but certain times of the day are just dreadful and others less dreadful, if thats a way to explain it.

At day 15 I drank 3 small beers, and that fucked me up to some degree again. I think I was at peak from recovery at about day 10-13. I hope, but also strongly believe that the alcohol wont permanently make it worse, just for a couple of weeks possibly. I'm ready to give up on anything drug related. I have little to no history of using drugs.

Nothing to this point really seems to help, or am in for a painful months/years to come? I've already booked an appointment at the doctors office this upcoming wednesday, so thats a step in the right direction. I'm also just 20 years old and this age is far too you to ruin your life at...
 
Hello and welcome to Bluelight.

What you're experiencing isn't something unusual, especially considering the dosage you took.
MDMA comedowns can be long and ruthless, but most of the time these symptoms subside within a few weeks.

I have experienced similar after-effects from MDMA when I have dosed way too heavily. It's taken me anywhere from a week to a few months to recover completely, but recovery is absolutely possible.

Try to eat healthy (maybe get some 5-HTP), exercise (take walks, for example), sleep, avoid ALL drugs (including alcohol) and try not to stress yourself out too much over this. Anxiety will aggravate any symptoms you have.
 
tubgirl.jpg said:
Hello and welcome to Bluelight.

What you're experiencing isn't something unusual, especially considering the dosage you took.
MDMA comedowns can be long and ruthless, but most of the time these symptoms subside within a few weeks.

I have experienced similar after-effects from MDMA when I have dosed way too heavily. It's taken me anywhere from a week to a few months to recover completely, but recovery is absolutely possible.

Try to eat healthy (maybe get some 5-HTP), exercise (take walks, for example), sleep, avoid ALL drugs (including alcohol) and try not to stress yourself out too much over this. Anxiety will aggravate any symptoms you have.
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I'm afraid that this isn't the case. Trying to think positive or doing something appears to just be kicking me back in the spot. I'm just not the same person.
 
Norway said:
I'm afraid that this isn't the case. Trying to think positive or doing something appears to just be kicking me back in the spot. I'm just not the same person.
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Well, that's exactly how I felt too. Like a stranger in a strange world - that is the DP/DR messing with your head.
It's barely been a month. You need to give it time.

I'm not trying to minimize what you're feeling. It's true, you might have caused yourself irreversible brain damage. I couldn't tell.
But neither can you, and assuming the worst is not going to help you.

Getting any kind of damage after one night of heavy dosing is rare.

I know that's a tough pill to swallow and probably the last thing you want to hear, but remaining hopeful and positive will go a very long way for you.

You are not in a unique position. MDMA is known for having severe comedowns when dosed heavily.


Hang in there and give it some time. Set realistic goals for yourself each day (i.e today I'll do the dishes/the laundry, today I'll take a walk) and as the days pass this will too.
 
@Norway Here is my advice:
Take it day by day. This will not last forever, even though 350-500mg is quite high (generally 120-200mg is the most you should be dosing in one night, maximum 120mg initial dose and 80mg redose.)

Taking 5-HTP (with EGCG to ensure cardiovascular safety) will help to replenish your serotonin. There is lot of anecdotal evidence of this helping following an MDMA overdose and both should be easily acquirable at Amazon or your local drugstore/health food store.

NAC can also be very helpful based on anecdotal evidence.

Other supplements such as Vitamin D, B12, Magnesium, Zinc, etc probably won't do much for replenishing serotonin but can all be very helpful regardless. Vitamin D specifically is a must for anyone not living in a very sunny climate, and even some who do (Even a decent portion of Australians suffer from Vitamin D deficiency.)
 
@Norway @adag96 Merged your posts into this thread at the request of the MDMA&ED moderation team. Feel free to ask any other questions you guys have about long-term comedowns and the issues you are experiencing, just do so in here.
 
Hi
I ve been suuffering from ltc from 11 /2018
A long lust of symptoms
What still remain is nightmares and vivid and sad dreams im not controlling my dreams its like somebody is controlling my mind any cure any idea help its been 3 + years
 
Samoz said:
Hi
I ve been suuffering from ltc from 11 /2018
A long lust of symptoms
What still remain is nightmares and vivid and sad dreams im not controlling my dreams its like somebody is controlling my mind any cure any idea help its been 3 + years
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Three years isn't LTC. It's something else. Please don't suffer needlessly. See a psychiatrist and talk about how you are feeling. The right therapeutic can help you feel more like yourself.
 
Anyone that suffers from LTC, this might be worth checking out:

Acupuncture Restores Brain Activity After Ecstasy Damage

Ecstasy (MDMA, Molly) use causes brain pathology and acupuncture restores cerebral perfusion.
www.healthcmi.com www.healthcmi.com

Electroacupuncture can reverse the impact that MDMA has had to the brain by increasing cerebral blood perfusion, activating brain cell vitality and metabolism, and by accelerating the repair of damaged cells.⁠
 
arrall said:
@Norway Here is my advice:
Take it day by day. This will not last forever, even though 350-500mg is quite high (generally 120-200mg is the most you should be dosing in one night, maximum 120mg initial dose and 80mg redose.)

Taking 5-HTP (with EGCG to ensure cardiovascular safety) will help to replenish your serotonin. There is lot of anecdotal evidence of this helping following an MDMA overdose and both should be easily acquirable at Amazon or your local drugstore/health food store.

NAC can also be very helpful based on anecdotal evidence.

Other supplements such as Vitamin D, B12, Magnesium, Zinc, etc probably won't do much for replenishing serotonin but can all be very helpful regardless. Vitamin D specifically is a must for anyone not living in a very sunny climate, and even some who do (Even a decent portion of Australians suffer from Vitamin D deficiency.)
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How long is typical to last? I've heard 350-500mg can cause permanent damage, but people have done more without any long term harm.
 
So I was way better then before, last weekend I took 1/4 line of coke. Every symptom I had is back, even crazy fatigue.
Although this proves to me it’s not brain damage we suffer from.
Hope I will recover from this stupid mistake soon.
 
Berendje said:
So I was way better then before, last weekend I took 1/4 line of coke. Every symptom I had is back, even crazy fatigue.
Although this proves to me it’s not brain damage we suffer from.
Hope I will recover from this stupid mistake soon.
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When did you take the mdma?
 
As i understand it, you recovered after the mdma, but then after the coke you felt bad again?
 
FauxReal said:
Three years isn't LTC. It's something else. Please don't suffer needlessly. See a psychiatrist and talk about how you are feeling. The right therapeutic can help you feel more like yourself.
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It is if you check the the old treads there are people who recovered in 7 years
 
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