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My plentyoffish.com meet-up gone wrong...

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lysis, I don't know what your deal is, but I'm looking for adive.

i don't think you are looking for advice. i think you're looking for people to agree with you and tell you that you handled the situation correctly. i suspect that you know you didn't. i also find your reference to alcohol as your 'medicine' very troubling. i think that you would probably be served better by some form of therapy rather than trying to score with chicks on plentyoffish.
 
i don't think you are looking for advice. i think you're looking for people to agree with you and tell you that you handled the situation correctly. i suspect that you know you didn't. i also find your reference to alcohol as your 'medicine' very troubling. i think that you would probably be served better by some form of therapy rather than trying to score with chicks on plentyoffish.

Well all you have to do is skim through the thread and see how many times I thanked people for their advice (whcih was sometimes harsh and not easy to hear) to see that your post here is inaccurate.

However I thank you so much for your kind words. I cannot begin to express my appreciation for all this.
 
Alas was right about the troll. Lysis was most likely right about the wife-beating.

Implying that I'm a troll would mean the original story wasn't true, so if none of what I said happened, what would lead you to believe I was a wife-beater?

You're not the troll police. If you don't like me or my thread, just leave rather than resorting to childish, unwarranted name-calling.

Long-time BL member, moderator Laika ia a good friend of mine and has been for over a decade now. He has vouched for me already in this thread and attempted to dispell some of the innaccuracies that have been floating around the thread about me. I suggest you read the last few pages in their entirety before making accusations.
 
To add to that, I admit I got a bit silly on page 5 - that's cause everybody was. The thread turned to a joke so I said fuck it. DOn't come in here and make accusations. You don't know me.
 
Don't turn this into high school everyone :)

As far as your story goes...honestly, online meet-ups are awkward and can end up being terrible. And a lot of people who meet online already have social issues including myself (thus meeting/talking online in the first place on a dating site). It sounds to me like two people collided, that otherwise wouldn't or shouldn't have ever met in the first place. Some people jsut do not get along or have nothing in common.

It's like school, the jocks hang out with other jocks cos they get along, have a lot in common, personalities are like, similar interests, etc etc...the jocks wouldn't hang out with the nerds because they wouldn't have much in common. I am sterotyping quite a bit, there's obviously more to people, just speaking generally here.
 
Don't turn this into high school everyone :)

As far as your story goes...honestly, online meet-ups are awkward and can end up being terrible. And a lot of people who meet online already have social issues including myself (thus meeting/talking online in the first place on a dating site). It sounds to me like two people collided, that otherwise wouldn't or shouldn't have ever met in the first place. Some people jsut do not get along or have nothing in common.

It's like school, the jocks hang out with other jocks cos they get along, have a lot in common, personalities are like, similar interests, etc etc...the jocks wouldn't hang out with the nerds because they wouldn't have much in common. I am sterotyping quite a bit, there's obviously more to people, just speaking generally here.

Thank you for the advice. Usuually i would use the internet to my advantage to get to know her more, but this time I didn't for some reason. I waited til "Doomsday" to come aquainted with her.
 
OP:

Much has been addressed in this thread, but one thing has not. How long were you corresponding with this woman? Was there some sort of relationship established, or was it just a first date?
 
OP:

Much has been addressed in this thread, but one thing has not. How long were you corresponding with this woman? Was there some sort of relationship established, or was it just a first date?

Actually that was addressed in the very first paragraph and then touched upon throughout the thread.

Thanks for the post.
 
Actually that was addressed in the very first paragraph and then touched upon throughout the thread.

Thanks for the post.

You're welcome. I didn't know if it was an actual 'date' though, so I required clarification. I've met up with people, not from plentyoffish but from the internet, for anything from socializing to jobs. Forgive me for wanting to get at the issue rather than write out of turn. It seems from context that it was a first date, but your 'YOU DON'T KNOW ME' mentality and subsequent derailments caused me, and likely others, a bit of confusion. You may want to brush up on your communication skills.

For argument's sake, let's treat this as a first date. You got wasted and passed out before the date even began. You then got upset because you felt the woman had stood you up. You have no job, no car, and a hostile attitude toward a woman with whom you corresponded over the Internet, not to mention the members of SLR who are offering you what has amounted to 6 pages of mostly helpful advice. I would be very alarmed if someone with whom I was corresponding acted out in the manner you did. I don't know whether you are trolling and clearly you are too socially inept to even go on a date, much less commit domestic violence, but I'd bet you've had problems with people in positions of authority, actual or perceived, before. Am I correct? Ever got detention or mouthed off to your parents? I'm not sliding down any slippery slopes here, merely stating the obvious.
 
^Is there anyone on BL who loves authority, never got detention and has never had arguments with their parents? Of course, that's beside the point.....Are you like some kind of "profiler"...Is this dude actually the "Yosemite slasher" or something?

Also, I don't really get how being too "inept" to go on a date would equate to being too "inept" to carry out acts of domestic violence...A date granted, requires the understanding of etiquette and social skills...You have to follow defined boundaries while at the same time trying to break the ice...At least, from what I've seen on TV thats what it looks like it supposed to be, I've never been on an actual date, sooo....

Anyway, all it requires to commit "domestic violence" is punching someone you live with!! nothing complicated about that! A lot more simple and straightforward than dating!
 
^Is there anyone on BL who loves authority, never got detention and has never had arguments with their parents? Of course, that's beside the point.....Are you like some kind of "profiler"...Is this dude actually the "Yosemite slasher" or something?

Also, I don't really get how being too "inept" to go on a date would equate to being too "inept" to carry out acts of domestic violence...A date granted, requires the understanding of etiquette and social skills...You have to follow defined boundaries while at the same time trying to break the ice...At least, from what I've seen on TV thats what it looks like it supposed to be, I've never been on an actual date, sooo....

Anyway, all it requires to commit "domestic violence" is punching someone you live with!! nothing complicated about that! A lot more simple and straightforward than dating!

I know the definition of domestic violence, and I didn't learn that from watching TV. Loosely, it means that the perpetrator is alleged to have committed assault resulting in harm to the satisfaction of the cops. The concept of people who live together or are in an intimate or dating relationship beating each other up is not foreign. There are warning signs, notably hostility, aggressive present behavior, alcohol, drugs, past behavior toward others, and yep, attitude.

Hardly am I profiling. And I can think of worse criminals than the inflammatory example of Cary Stayner, the guy who was convicted of murdering four women in Mariposa County, California (seriously). I don't know whether he slashed them, but he got caught and he is presently on death row. Part of his confession was that he fantasized about murdering women since he was a child, and luckily he was caught before he murdered more.

I'll go with the guy who gives me a wink or bats his eyelashes sweetly before the guy who has to prove he is interested by force. And you admit that you have never been on an actual date. It's not like TV necessarily. Most first dates are a getting-to-know-you process that is based in conversation. The way to my heart on a first date is for my date to talk about his life and ask me about mine. It's meant to be lighthearted. A sweet, thoughtful gesture such as walking me to my car or giving me a hug is the way to lead to a sweet first kiss. I don't see the OP being capable of doing that. Yelling at me is definitely not smooth, that's for sure. Basic social skills and etiquette should be a given.

I've had arguments with my parents and even a couple uncomfortable conversations with LEO, but nothing that led to permanent disconnection or charges. It's a misconception that all Bluelighters are criminals. Most of us are pretty peaceful people who are most definitely not socially inept.
 
^Is there anyone on BL who loves authority, never got detention and has never had arguments with their parents? Of course, that's beside the point.....Are you like some kind of "profiler"...Is this dude actually the "Yosemite slasher" or something?

Also, I don't really get how being too "inept" to go on a date would equate to being too "inept" to carry out acts of domestic violence...A date granted, requires the understanding of etiquette and social skills...You have to follow defined boundaries while at the same time trying to break the ice...At least, from what I've seen on TV thats what it looks like it supposed to be, I've never been on an actual date, sooo....

Anyway, all it requires to commit "domestic violence" is punching someone you live with!! nothing complicated about that! A lot more simple and straightforward than dating!

It's naive and idealistic to ignore warning signs, because you don't want to stereotype someone, but much of the young and naive on this forum don't have the life lessons that give them the red flags unless they have been physically abused themselves. Why do you think most predators go after very young girls?

The OP also has a posting history that is disturbing, so unless he's just trolling, perhaps someone's post will jolt him into seeing therapy for what looks like a very dark future for him and the girls he comes into contact with.
 
^Is there anyone on BL who loves authority, never got detention and has never had arguments with their parents? Of course, that's beside the point.....Are you like some kind of "profiler"...Is this dude actually the "Yosemite slasher" or something?

Also, I don't really get how being too "inept" to go on a date would equate to being too "inept" to carry out acts of domestic violence...A date granted, requires the understanding of etiquette and social skills...You have to follow defined boundaries while at the same time trying to break the ice...At least, from what I've seen on TV thats what it looks like it supposed to be, I've never been on an actual date, sooo....

Anyway, all it requires to commit "domestic violence" is punching someone you live with!! nothing complicated about that! A lot more simple and straightforward than dating!


I've never had detention...

*Feeling like a total square lol*
 
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