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My plentyoffish.com meet-up gone wrong...

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Pagey said:
Korey, I think one of your main problems is your conviction that people won't be interested in you/will find you weird because some of your interests or habits differ from the norm, and this is not only holding you back from being yourself, but also translating itself into a frustration which as we saw, leads to nothing good. I think if you realized people really aren't that judgmental and opened yourself up to show who you actually are, things are likely to go much better. And it's not as if you need to have everything in common to form relationships either, sometimes it works perfectly well when you can make your partner discover new things etc.
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Thanks. I'm not quite as uncomfortable showing my true nature to people as it may seem so far in the thread. It's mainly that in real life I do not disclose it due to not be outgoing enough rather than due to the fear of being criticized. I mean as you can see I listed all my interests in my POF profile. I'm actually don't have a super pessimistic sort of outlook where I think everyone would be judgemental.

So you're a mod now huh? lol congrats.

Did you check the pics/ Did you think the coffin was hot?
 
Tude said:
I don't understand. You're living life on your own terms, yet you're not happy. I gather this from you saying you're not eccentric. Why aren't you happy?
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Well, as stated, I suffer from severe clinical depression. It's just that simple as far as the unhappiness goes.
 
Hello to my strange creatures in the land of the drug. Please tell me what you think of this sacred video montage of October's annual, spiritual gathering held in ritualistic, ceremonial fashion. We call it THOR: The Hour of Reprisal.

[YOUTUBE]uQ9hU4V4GM4[/YOUTUBE]
 
<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/uQ9hU4V4GM4" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>.....
 
Cornishman said:
Op, if you won the lottery tomorrow would you still be unhappy/depressed?

Maybe it's worth making some changes to your lifestyle so you can feel better in yourself?
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haha, of course I would dude. I'm not depressed because I'm broke. I'm also not depressed due to anything related to surroundings or situation. Rather, it's the opposite: my depression has inevitably caused my poor life situation; not vice versa. I suffer from severe clinical depression and anxiety, and since it's not related to any sort of post-traumatic stress, the root cause is - as you may or may not already have an understanding of - a chemical imbalance. It's a biochemical thing man. Certain lifestyle changes, atmospheric changes, relationship changes, etc etc can always no doubt improve on my situation, but the underlying fact is that I was born genetically hardwired to have these emotional and psychological defects. I have suffered from clinical depression and anxiety since as far as my memory goes back, which is age 2.
 
KoreyS said:
Thanks. I'm not quite as uncomfortable showing my true nature to people as it may seem so far in the thread. It's mainly that in real life I do not disclose it due to not be outgoing enough rather than due to the fear of being criticized. I mean as you can see I listed all my interests in my POF profile. I'm actually don't have a super pessimistic sort of outlook where I think everyone would be judgemental.

So you're a mod now huh? lol congrats.

Did you check the pics/ Did you think the coffin was hot?
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Oh okay, fair enough then. I'm glad to hear you're not as afraid of people judging your interests as I thought. As for not being outgoing, I'm not sure whether or not this is something that bothers you but if you'd like for that to improve, sometimes the best way to do it is just to force yourself to go out more, simply. Alcohol/drugs will only do so much in terms of reducing social anxiety, and often they'll just end up backfiring on you. I know my social anxiety probably was/isn't as bad as yours but when I moved to a different country at the start of this year I can assure you I was absolutely terrified of going out and meeting new people because I was convinced no one would like me and I wouldn't fit in - so I just forced myself at the beginning to see people and act as if I was enjoying it (it really wasn't fun at first) and eventually I fit in just like everyone else and made friends perfectly normally. Sometimes you just have to push yourself and realize you're actually more sociable than you thought :) (I don't mean to belittle your anxiety or whatever - just a suggestion from someone else who has clinical depression).

And yeah thanks :)

I did see the pics, er didn't think the coffin was 'hot' but it was a cool picture and the pictures in general were nice. I'm sure if you work on your social skills/how you interact with others you'll have no problem finding someone, but yeah I do think maybe it would be good for you to work on yourself first.
 
This is a pic of me dressed in a beautiful, elegant, oriental shepherd outfit at a spiritual gathering that I hosted called The Hour of Reprisal. Do I look sexy for all the bitches on here?

545709_10151055476177245_234032403_n.jpg


Here's the video montage that details this sacred evening: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQ9hU4V4GM4&list=HL1354379108&feature=mh_lolz
 
You got stood up. Big deal it has happened to most people at one time or another. I once sat in a restaurant for an hour waiting for my date to turn up & she didn't. Got a call to say she was on her way & then when I rang her after waiting an hour her phone was off. She rang me the next day to apologise saying she got caught up & I told her to lose my number & moved on.
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Ugh. This is so rude, and I don't like when girls (or men I suppose..but I think it's more women usually) do this. I went out with a guy a little while ago, and I am such a ditz, I got caught in traffic AND went the wrong way to the restaurant. This guy must have been stood up before, because he left work right after me, and I was still there like 45 mins after him. LOL He called me and was like "Umm, you're not standing me up right cuz just say you don't want to hang out if you don't." LOL I had to assure him I really REALLY was on my way. haha
 
KoreyS said:
No I am not offended at all. I appreciate the response.
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Korey you seem like a reasonable enough if troubled young man especially after seeing your profile. Just be the best person you can be & always stay true to yourself. You will find your special someone who loves you for being you. Your interests listed are bound to attract some unique individuals but that is what you want right?
 
Lysis said:
Ugh. This is so rude, and I don't like when girls (or men I suppose..but I think it's more women usually) do this. I went out with a guy a little while ago, and I am such a ditz, I got caught in traffic AND went the wrong way to the restaurant. This guy must have been stood up before, because he left work right after me, and I was still there like 45 mins after him. LOL He called me and was like "Umm, you're not standing me up right cuz just say you don't want to hang out if you don't." LOL I had to assure him I really REALLY was on my way. haha
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At the time I was at the peak of my gambling addiction & I was pretty pissed off so went on a 2 day binge. Most expensive "date" I ever had thats for sure ;).
 
koreys, you do realize you have listed your own mental health issues as your interests? perhaps leave it at 'psychology.' i'm getting a jim jones vibe. my queer eye for the straight guy advice is to buy some clothes that fit better and grow your hair + shave your facial hair.
 
The most recent pics are the three of me in the black t-shirt. Those were taken at the 2nd annual Hour of reprisal ceremony. The one in the coffin was back in January when I was a fat fuck. The one sitting down in the chair was when I was chiselled and fit and all the bitches loved me. I have shaved my dome since I was a kid. all the bitches love my freshly shaven dome and line up for me.
 
damn, she sounds like a cool chick. so what, she stood your crazy ass up. she's crazy too. nothing like some crazy sex :p

man, you just need to lighten up. maybe you should try meditating or exercise. last resort both with an SSRI like paxil, prozac, welbutrin. or M-D-M-A... now that's a way to hit it off with a girl like that. She sounds pretty lighthearted. so she stood you up. you both were obviously anxious. you drank so much you blacked out. maybe it was for the best she didn't meet up with your drunken ass... Could have woken up in jail :p

btw... isn't oxycodone an analogue of hydrocodone? isn't hydrocodone just synthetic codeine? same difference as dilaudid and oxymorphone, and morphine... ADD mods please correct me if I am mistaken :)

IDK why you asked why she's staring at you. usually when a girl stares at me they are thinking about how they want my dick...

320px-Paris_Tuileries_Garden_Facepalm_statue.jpg


epic fail.
 
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Korey you seem like a cool guy I think that eventually you'll figure things out, or things will work out for you.

Just give it time, and be patient.

Since you're into meditation, the occult/magick, etc. do you know other people who are into these things?

Keep in mind that friendships, actual friendships take time and effort.

Be careful about blacking out from booze and combining downers with booze.
 
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severely etarded said:
man, you just need to lighten up. maybe you should try meditating or exercise. last resort both with an SSRI like paxil, prozac, welbutrin. or M-D-M-A... now that's a way to hit it off with a girl like that. She sounds pretty lighthearted. so she stood you up. you both were obviously anxious. you drank so much you blacked out. maybe it was for the best she didn't meet up with your drunken ass... Could have woken up in jail :p

btw... isn't oxycodone an analogue of hydrocodone? isn't hydrocodone just synthetic codeine? same difference as dilaudid and oxymorphone, and morphine... ADD mods please correct me if I am mistaken :)

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lol did you read the thread? Apparently not.

And as for the opiates, all opiates are naturally or synthetically derived from the poppy papaver somniferum. That doesn't make them the same lol. Codiene isn't oxycodone. Anyone who has a history of opiate use will tell you this. I fonly a shitty drug like codiene were as potent as oxys haha. You have no experience with opiates I see.

PriestTheyCalledHim said:
Since you're into meditation, the occult/magick, etc. do you know other people who are into these things? Keep in mind that friendships, actual friendships take time and effort.
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I do not do Magick. I am into Zen Buddhism.
 
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