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I can literally answer any question ranging from, bioavailability snorting, injecting (intramuscular - intravenous) or oral consumption, to the rewards and pitfalls of prescription pill use. Everything from lowly codeine to the big boys dilaudid (hydromorphone) and opana (oxymorphone). I am only willing to do this because of the huge amount of misinformation that is out there. Although I am a drug user/abuser, it is important for me to help weed through all the lies, ignorance and propaganda that gets posted. I am even willing to answer any questions about how to break down various prescription drugs with their supposed "safety' features.
I just happened across your site and joined just to hopefully give what little info I can hope it helps someone out! THe fake m box discussion! I've ran across a few that sound similar to these Mollenkopht things but without the 2 day illness! Just a shade darker, half a shade even! Same with size a miniscule amount thicker! But near flawless! A guy gave me two to show around I had my dude try half one. Nasaly. He cried! Said it burned like nothin he'd ever felt before! The only significant detail I've noticed is that tIe ones I've seen were all chipped around the edges like they'd been in a bottle and shaken badly !
i think i am going to keep a private journal of my working out... for some reason, i am self conscious about too many people knowing about it. i guess if i fail, i don't want anyone to know i was trying. as for why on BL, i would rather keep all my ramblings in one place as opposed to getting a livejournal or something. and maybe in a few months i will look back at these post and notice progress.

i've lost 6 pounds since i started :)

i've pretty much cut out caffeine (and pop as a result) and beer. i occasionally have a drink on the weekend but nothing like the 5-6 beers i was drinking nightly. i am making an effort to eat more than one giant meal day. altho its hard to eat anything more than a granola bar or banana for breakfast cause i am not hungry. i am used to just downing a coke zero. actually, since i stopped drinking beer, i haven't been craving fatty/greasy foods. without fast food, i actually eat pretty healthy.

my arms are weak. i struggle to do exercises using 3 lb weights. by the last set, i am using just my arms for few repetitions. (i think i used those terms right, or maybe its the other way around?) according to my trainer, i've been using my lower back to lift things instead of my arms and chest (i think that is what he said anyhow).

my legs are decently strong but my balance is off, so we are working on me using proper form and the right muscle groups for lower body exercises. and i fucking hate core exercises.
Let me start by saying I am in no means a perfect man! I love my girlfriend but I'm afraid I'm falling out of love with her.She and I both use and I from time to time make ends meet through various ways that include substance of choice. None the less she steals from me when able! She also lies about it and when I'm out she is the first one on the phone trying to get str8 from competition!!!!

She's hot, and doesn't cheat, cooks, cleans, and though she doesn't want too even works a real job. She started as my friend so i care for her deeply but I dont think I can do this anymore. I'm trying desperately to stop and out chaotic relationship isn't helping.

Oh and not to mention I'm also very passive with her and I think she is taking advantage. She has anxiety attacks whenever we argue, or I'm left mad over something she has said or done. Either way she blows me and we put a pin in it for the day. But the days that follow are always the same arguing and threats and then make sex.

Its a brutal cycle and the sex ain't this damn good. BL help should I bouce, to the left that as*, i have other options. Way cleaner, happier, healthier girls.
As I approach further education, I am reminded of my English classes. My dude has a degree in English. He is at a tortured IT job. Blah.

I do not, nor do I wish for one. I'd rather concentrate on other languages, specifically, Spanish and French. I would like to achieve true fluency in both languages.

I believe I would be a translator, provided I can translate in real time. I am close. I have been a student of other languages for a long time. I can translate in my native language in real time. Because of this, I am not broke.

I am, indeed, a language nerd. I would tell my dude I love him, as I do, but I do not want him to freak out on me. I believe he would use *that* L-word if he could. I do love and respect him. He is a wonderful man who takes me on hikes, adventures, and will even take me to Arby's (my one fast food). We go to the awesome Portland food carts together. Ironically, I am the scrawniest I have been since secondary school. I don't know what hit me; at age 31, I don't have any of the things such as eye-lines or face lines. I love him, dearly, and I might just tell him that this evening. In honesty, I loved his writing before I was able to conceptualize love.

I do not love everything about him. I wish he would get on a plane - he is totally phobic of airplanes. My family and I love aviation; I'm not allowed to tell anyone about the small plane that crashed. Oh, wait, I did! Both the pilot and the passenger not only lived, but didn't get even a bruise! My aunt made a deathbed promise to her second husband that she would learn to fly. Now, she is on her third. Yikes. I'm not willing to talk about her third husband, as I have nothing nice to say in that regard.

I believe I will pursue a career in translation. I know I can do it, not without effort. I will go back to university to so do. Everyone in my life keeps about my life in law. Others can have those jobs; I spent my time working for attorneys, and I come, increasingly, to the conclusion that I am not meant for the legal field. I would rather achieve fluency in languages. One of my teachers (American; native English speaker) speaks 6 OTHER FLIPPING LANGUAGES. He's happily married to a woman who is his equal. I'm glad he's back after the Japanese tsunami. The radiation is still so bad... I have my Neko-lucky cat on my front door; the real Neko is with my father in California. Neko has adopted his little brothers, Sasha and Albert, quite effectively. All three of the boys sleep in the bed with their granddaddy, and all get along.

My father, the hero, is going to see my psychiatrist for his own well-being. I support this.

I am a bit jaded at present; it's just not getting any easier. I didn't sign up for anything like this. I look at others who have 'dreamy' lives with a significant amount of jealousy. I do not have green eyes, but I may as well. I am not underprivileged (though I am definitely not wealthy!). I can feed, clothe, and house myself. It will all be fine someday. My eyes remain true blue.

Some flipping day. I really wish to be at home in Cali. It's not happening today. My boyfriend and my family in Oregon would crap bricks - yet as long as I have myself, I have everything. I know I can get in the car at any time. I have chosen not to for now.

HEY BLOGS MODS and OUR ADMIN <3 - where is this epic meetup going to occur? I think Vancouver, BC, would be properly badass, and so I present the idea. It's Bluelight. I'll bring myself and either a train or my car. My passport is in transit. Meetup? Yeah, let's make this happen. HEY DAVE - I might have to fly through Edmonton soon.

I am content with this little life of mine. I have my moments, as has everyone. Blogs are a place to vent within guidelines. I will continue to do my best, and I hope someone finds my thoughts interesting.
Who needs drugs and alcohol when one can feel like this sober.

Never thought being in love could feel so wonderful, never knew someone could be far from perfect but so wonderfully perfect to me.

Life is wonderful lately, days are awesome, things are just fantastic.

I haven't thought about using anything in at least a week. I haven't used in at least 3 months, and I have been off meds for about 2-3 weeks now and I am completely fine ...at least it feels that way.

I am never depressed, I do still have some anger but not to the level I was before, I do conceed that I will probably need Clonazepam for during the day but not to the extent that I would have needed before. I was taking 2mg to calm me down before but I think that 1mg would be fine.

She finally used those 3 wonderful words, and I can't stop smiling, she makes me feel so wonderful that I can't help but to smile all day long.

My health is pretty good but I am going to make an appointment for the first Thursday in September to see what my doc says. She said after I saw the Neuro we would talk about new medications. I don't like the SNRI that she was thinking of, can't think of the name right now but I flat out refused to take it, EVER. Might talk about Lamactil(sp?) or Clonazepam.

We'll see how things go.
Coming down on acid, wanted to go to sleep, took a sleeping pill. Couldn't sleep because I was outside and it was like fifty gazillion degrees outside. So I did sleep but then woke up half an hour later and it didn't wear off. I felt like a zombie because I was still tripping a bit and on this sleeping pill.

My bf says that I kept sitting up and being like "I can't sleep" and flipping over. I don't remember this :s I must have been pretty asleep ... but not really?!? I don't know.

I hate taking a sleeping pill but not sleeping. It's brutal.

I did it once with mushrooms. My first trip ... didn't have anything else to get over it so my bf gave me sleeping pills. Took like three before I got to sleep. I felt like a zombie before it.

I'm not sure what it is in the sleeping pills, maybe diphenhydromine because I know that can be used to get high. Never done it though. If it's anything like this, I don't want to try it lol.
CONTACT ME NOW IF YOU WANT SAMPLES OF PAIN KILLERS LIKE METHAPHOLINE,ADDERALL VICODIN,TRAMADOLL,METHADONE, SUBOXONE,RITALIN,MORPHINE,AND ALL OTHER PAINKILLERS YOU MAY NEED.WE ARE DESCRETE AND CONFINDENTIAL.EMAIL ME NOW:[email protected]
Ok Since no one is going to help you n i know if u want it ur going to try it... i consider myself very educated espeshally in iv narcotics, if u would like to question my knowledge i welcome your questions... By the way pls read the added advise at the end

First Step
Go to your local Fleet Farm or Farm Supply store and purchase a 3cc 21gauge syringe
note when they ask if its for farm use say NO "btw ur not actually using this syringe to shoot"

Second Step
Suck on pill until coating is gone and the pill is all white and crush, a razor blade wud b helpful because the abg brand is rather clumpy
chop into smallest pieces possible because u will need to use less heat n opiates are VERY heat INtolorent "meaning the more heat u use the more dope u lose"

Third Step
Prepare a Cigarette filter cut about 1/4in long then peel paper off the cigarette filter n tear what youve cut in a 2/3 to 1/3 portions "just for the large needle" because ive found with excessive needles ur less likley to get cotton fever with the cigarette filter over cotton "this fact only applies to large needles because with smaller more widley used needles it does not absorb well enought for .5 to 1cc needles"

Fourth Step
Place about 2cc of water in spoon and heat to boil before u put in the morphine... then place morphine in heated water n keep it hot then boil again when it looks as if most sediments is a waxy liquid place the smaller filter in the spoon after dipping it in water"the smaller filter is to collect filler so its easier to pull back as much as u can easily" now there may or may not b liquid left in the spoon either way add about .75cc of water and rinse"rinse means recook" until sediment looks about as dissolved as its gonna get and place the 2nd larger filter on top of the older filter to avoid sediment build up on the filter and pull back the plunger to get the rest of the morph... Finally Fill the rest of the syringe with water to dillute

Final Step
For this step have larger cotton filters ready about the size of a pea(only use this size for morphine) have as many ready as shots you intend to do plus a couple more never hurts
Finally empty contents of 3cc syringe into a new and or cleaned spoon, b ready with heat and the amount of syringes u intend on shooting
Heat lightley just to loosen the waxy filler"if it boils stop heat u are loseing morphine by the second" then place 1 filter in the spoon and repeat until liquid is gone or needs to be heated again, keep in mind if u heat spoon with cotton inside do not pull out of that cotton again because there easy to get cotton fever from... which is terrible... then when u have all ur syringes set they are ready to shoot gratz

Added Advise
With this method its better to put a larger amount of morph in the spoon because ur preparing it for the rest of the night.

WARNING if u plan on using a animal needle for actuall use be warned u will have very quick noticeable tracks impossible to hide unless u know were to shoot and cotton fever is much much more likley" (for advise on use of a larger needle or how to obtain a large cc needle without the massive tip pls contact me at my email or FB, preferabally email its more private... b ready for questions on tolerence or knowledge because more room means more dope which means easier od... or if a 1cc still will suffice just go online for your local needle exchange its free or u could try to convince walgreens pharmacy

"Keep in mind the reason u "cant" iv certin opiate pharmasudicals or others that gel is not because of the drug NORMALLY, its because of the filler and buffer the specific company puts in, you just need to learn how to seperate the binder n filler n it can actually be better for u to iv certin drugs than snort or injest because ur not getting all the other shit in ur system... with the acception of pretty much all speed which is all quickley corrosive, which means faster deteration of veins... if u wud like to test or see what i mean shoot all ur non speed drugs in one arm and all speed in the other n watch the difference"note when i say pretty much it means personal expirence, which with drug use in the iv or rave category is quite excessive by my standard(espeshally in opiates including pharmasudical and non, n note in all my opinions on drug standards r probally more the the most drug abused friend u have}
Hey new hear and my friend swim is struggling to become clean, swim does anywhere from 3 g's of raw to 500 mg of oxy a day.....he is just very depressed and needs a bit of motivatoin to get up and face the world again.
If it was up to him he would never quit but financials are a big part of it and the tollerance is way out of control. ANY THOUGHTS?.
On August 5th a friend and I had split a bottle (5fl.oz) of Delsym 12 hour release. We were having a wonderful trip. Listening to some Led Zeppelin, and just discovering new realms inside of our minds. About an hour and a half later (after taking the Delsym) my friend's dealer had called, and informed my friend that he had just got some shrooms...Of course, my friend and I (not in our best minds) decided to go walk to get the eighth of shrooms. We were still tripping balls on the Delsym, so the 1 hour walk didn't bother us much. When we got to the dealers, we had decided to split, and eat the eighth of shrooms there...so we didn't have them on us while walking back to my friend's place....I was already fucked up on the Delsym, but I stupidly ate the shrooms. All was fine, we thanked the dealer, and went on our way back to my friend's house. Then about 10 minutes later, I started to feel the shrooms. (Keep in mind, I am 5' 11" and 107lbs. so drugs hit me pretty fast) It felt pretty amazing...But I was also very frightened (I had done shrooms before, and I have done dxm before...I've just never mixed them) because I had never felt such an insane trip before...I felt literally mind fucked. So my friend had called one of his buddies to come pick us up. We sat down and waited at a Long John Silver's for about 5 minutes (it felt like an hour to us) and his buddy arrived, and gave us a ride back to my friend's place. Once we got back, we layed down on my friend's bed in the darkness, and turned on some Pink Floyd. The visuals were AMAZING, I saw sail boats drifting off into the sunset, in a collage of psychedelic, kalaidescope patterns that swayed with the rythm of the music. (We were laying there for hours, just sinking into our own minds, forgetting that we even exsisted. It was truely beautiful.) But then all of a sudden, the shrooms peaked, and I guess that also caused the DXM to peak...My heart started pounding, I mean POUNDING. I was very disorriented. I knew my heart was beating fast, too fast. But I was tripping too hard to think logically...I started clutching my rosary like it was the last thing I was ever going to hold. and I just laid there until the violent pounding of my heart subsided. After the first day, the shrooms wore off (Thank god) but I couldn't sleep, and was still very anxious, and on edge from the dxm...I actually went to the ER on the third day, because I was frightened that I still felt the DXM, and that I couldn't sleep...All they did was tell me to drink fluids, and eat more than regular. They had also given me an Ativan (Only one, and at the hospital...they didn't want to send me home with anything) to help me relax...which didn't help at all. I went sleepless until the 5th night. I've been sleeping good since...But I am still not back to normal yet. It's been 15 days, and I still see trails, and all these moving speckles. I am starting to think this is permanent...I am so very worried guys. I've forgotten how normal life feels...My pupils are still dialated. I'm not sure what to do about this. I'm seeing a doctor in the start of next week. Wish me luck. If I am a DXM casualty...then it is my own fault. I brought this on myself, and I hope that none of you make this same mistake. It may seem fun to have a permanent trip...But really it makes you a depressed recluse. Not fun... :/
As you've probably noticed, Blogs has been busier since the upgrade!
This is awesome news, but leaves us with the need for an extra Mod!
Both of the Blogs Mods have double ModSticks and are busy bees!
They can keep up fine and do an amazing job here, but we all put our heads together and decided to bring on one more!

If you're interested please include the following in your application:

*Why you are interested in Blogs

*Why you'd be a good moderator for Blogs

*What vision to you have for Blogs

*Your time zone and the hours you can dedicate to Blogs

Please send all applications to Dave, OverDone, TommyBoy and Ocean by Aug 24th.
Good Luck to all who apply!!
Tonight, I feel some sort of way and I want to act out. I don't want to get high (that is no longer an acceptable option in my life).

I would like some sort of escape, though.

Sex? With who? I don't do randoms or one nighters.

Violence? No thanks. I can't hurt someone simply because I hurt. Besides, I have a life worth living now and don't need consequences.

This fucked up perspective. These thoughts that focus on failing.

I guess I just need to feel these feelings, ignore the thoughts and they will pass. They always do.

I thought sleep would be a good idea, just start a new day tomorrow. I can't sleep, though. If I feel like I am failing and not pushing hard enough, how dare I sleep. I gotta keep this shit moving and DO something.

Action, man... fucking action, effort and change is the remedy.

My impatience and inability to see the real results of past actions, efforts and changes is fucking with me.

Fucking pussy. I got clean and I got soft. I've had it much, much, MUCH worse. What the fuck am I stressing this small shit for?

Fuck this. The gym allows me to hurt myself in a positive manner.

See yas later
I have recently had an opportunity to try Coca flour (powderized dried coca leaf). I used it both as a traditional tea with sweetner and also wrapped in a coffee filter with sodium bicarb in my cheek.

The tea is distinctly sweet and very enjoyable as is but I like things really sweet so I add some Stevia. Overall it gave me more energy than coffee. There was a sloped return to my baseline of grogginess (from lack of sleep) after an hour of drinking the two cups worth (2-3g of flour). There was a mild numbing of the tongue and cheeks. Drinking it without filtering the plant material resulted in some mild diarrhea. I used a coffee maker with a reuseable plastic filter to make it. It is also sold in tea bags.

Where I got the most results in terms of energy is by keeping it in my cheek and sucking on it. I put 3g of flour along with 1-1.5g of sodium bicarb in a coffee filter and to sweeten it some stevia. I wrapped it up and stuffed it in my left cheek. Within minutes I had a distinct increase in alertness and a clean feeling where my eyes were fully open instead of 3/4 open from my usual grogginess/narcolepsy. I noticed a slight increase in body temperature.

Whether using it for energy or to enjoy it as a beverage, Coca Tea (known in Peru as "Mate de Coca") is a great product. From what I have read it has low risk of addiction because the variety of alkaloids in it prevent one from becoming too stimulated. In other words there is sort of a ceiling. Nonetheless moderation is probably best just in case. I find it ideal for situations where I need to get some chores done and don't have the energy. A quick 30-45 minute boost without harsh jitters or insomnia later in the evening.

I have never used Cocaine either as freebase or HCL, and probably won't ever, so I can't comment as to how it compares (and supposedly the Coca Tea sold in the US is decocainized -- bearing in mind that there are many other alkaloids that aren't Schedule II in Coca Tea).

I will also note that I did not experience cravings when ceasing use of Coca. However, I have an aversion to the vast majority of psychostimulants so my anecdote may not apply to most. For instance I did not fiend for Mephedrone after using it -- quite the opposite in fact.

Those in the US may be surprised to know it is available domestically (cant go into details obviously) but given the availability it seems to be legal. Importing it can still pose problems but doesnt result in prosecution if its under 1kg from what I have read*. The issue of legalities is quite confusing.

* I am not a lawyer, I am just passing on anecdotal reports.
Wil loves what he does, but the question 'What do you do?'epitomises inane conversation that is just a social routine when he enters the world of the 'straight'.
Will have been doing drugs on and off for a 20 years or so. He doesn't sell, doesn't steal to support his habit and is a functioning successful member of the community.
On the contrary he is proud of what he does and his business contributes and positively impacts on the community.
But he is always seeking something more. The 9-5 grind, buying a house and paying it off so that when he dies his children can have doesn't appeal.
Marriage, an institution fabricated by the factions that dictate social etiquette, didn't suit-to be with a partner for the sake of it. People change.
But he can't picture a life without drugs.
The weekend BBQ at some estate, 30km's from the city, having to 'mingle', socialise for the sake of it, having to answer and explain 'What he does', for the tenth time and even worse, asking it himself.
Longing to be 'off chops' escape the humdrum, the mundane, the normal.
Once you have been there, how can you go back.
It's killing him slowly, mentally, physically and financially.
Death by a thousand grams, lured continually like the proverbial moth to a flame.
He can stop and has, but what then? What's the same as the rush from coke? The feeling or warmth from smack? The complete euphoria from a double drop of the perfect flipper? The sense of industry from ice?
Base jumping? Car racing? Deep sea fishing? What everyday, week? Sure.
How can he go back? What is the norm?
What does he do?
In the past few months, I have been receiving "urgent" messages -- perhaps from my subconscious -- that I need to prepare myself to live in solitude. This being said, I cannot understand what this is trying to tell me. I currently am in a relationship with a very special person in which I believe we get along well. I am trying to sort through the possibilities of my subconscious requiring me to live by myself or if it simply means mental preparations (a "just in case", if you will) for any time I might have to live by myself.

I have a wonderful, supportive family and, as I have mentioned, I'm not considering breaking up with that special person. It's putting some stress in our relationship, though.

Any thoughts?

PS. Yes, I am a camel.
Hello all. I snorted a 20 mg norco, and then a few hours later took a 30 mg adderall. I'm feeling a bit shaky and weird. What should I do?
I always told myself: Captainballs, all you have to do at this waiting tables job is go sober for one or two days and you will come out ahead money-wise. Well I did. Sunday.

Saturday night, I was out of everything. I had been doing h pretty much 24 hours per day for the last week with bars. I was unable to score anything, not even pills, on Saturday night. Enter Sunday: someone had previously paid me to take their shift, and the day a fiend turns down $15 is a cold day in hell, so I did it, making my Sunday about 12 hours long.

I was about as anxious as it gets. The previous night, I did not sleep at all. what do I have to rest about? No money, girlfriend basically trapped in another country and I don't have the financial muscle anymore to un-bind her, living at mom's house, resting on two degrees that cost nearly $150,000 to get, credit score that puts me on par with a convicted felon - all of these things running through my mind when I'm sober.

I show up to work and do my first shift with only minor panic attacks. Sometimes it's just hard for me to believe that I'm serving people food. It's surreal all the fucking time unless I am doped to the gills. I can't imagine that selling drugs would be less stressful than this, but at least you have the upper hand on customers these days because of the prices and the rain or shine demand. In the restaurant business, you have to hustle like crazy for minor profit that gets taxed internally by the illegal kitchen staff payout and externally by the government.

I just don't get this whole planet sometimes. I was raised to be a total liar and thief, so when I get a job where that's not the mode of operation, I am suddenly an actor. Even when no one is looking, I am being honest and working hard. Then, I discover that even in these menial jobs, it doesn't pay to be an honest or good person. The fake me gets walked all over by management. And it bothers me, because I've turned the pitbull off so that I'm easy to get along with. I need the job, but it's so hard to keep my instincts under control.

Which, I guess, is why I will never be sober at work ever again.
I'm facing prison. Possibly a long time.

The whole thing's a clusterfuck of a misunderstanding, but regardless, I can't afford proper representation.

The Public Defender strikes me as one with a double digit IQ and a triple digit income, he's no help.

I send him long, concise, well thought out questions which he ignores.

I'm being charged with aggravated harassment in New York state. I wrote some cryptic, vague and poetic words to a cunt that fucked me over. She took it as a threat. I should have cut my losses. I should have known better. Oh well.

He wants to know if I want a jury trial. He's a wimp full of fear. If anything this is a freedom of speech issue. If there was no intent to cause alarm, and there certainly wasn't, they shouldn't be allowed to take hearsay and conjecture and threaten my fucking freedom. It's an outrage, but I"m not surprised. This rotten planet profits from the pain, suffering, misery, and bondage of its human inhabitants.


Some get rich, others eat shit and die.




He Who Goes to Law Takes a Wolf by the Ears

Here's the charge:

Section 240.30 Aggravated harassment in the second degree.

A person is guilty of aggravated harassment in the second degree when, with intent to harass, annoy, threaten or alarm another person, he or she:

1. Either (a) communicates with a person, anonymously or otherwise by telephone, or by telegraph, mail or any other form of written communication, in a manner likely to cause annoyance or alarm; or (b) causes a communication to be initiated by mechanical or electronic means or otherwise, with a person, anonymously or otherwise, by telephone, or by telegraph, mail or any other form of written communication, in a manner likely to cause annoyance or alarm; or

2. Makes a telephone call, whether or not a conversation ensues, with no purpose of legitimate communication; or

3. Strikes, shoves, kicks, or otherwise subjects another person to physical contact, or attempts or threatens to do the same because of a belief or perception regarding such person's race, color, national origin, ancestry, gender, religion, religious practice, age, disability or sexual orientation, regardless of whether the belief or perception is correct; or

4. Commits the crime of harassment in the first degree and has previously been convicted of the crime of harassment in the first degree as defined by section 240.25 of this article within the preceding ten years.

Aggravated harassment in the second degree is a class A misdemeanor.

Have you ever such vague nonsense in your life?

Regardless. They're profiting from my slip-up and have good reason to.

There are approximately 2 million inmates in state, federal and private prisons throughout the country. According to California Prison Focus, "no other society in human history has imprisoned so many of its own citizens." The figures show that the United States has locked up more people than any other country: a half million more than China, which has a population five times greater than the U.S. Statistics reveal that the United States holds 25% of the world's prison population, but only 5% of the world's people. From less than 300,000 inmates in 1972, the jail population grew to 2 million by the year 2000. In 1990 it was one million. Ten years ago there were only five private prisons in the country, with a population of 2,000 inmates; now, there are 100, with 62,000 inmates. It is expected that by the coming decade, the number will hit 360,000, according to reports.

What has happened over the last 10 years? Why are there so many prisoners?

"The private contracting of prisoners for work fosters incentives to lock people up. Prisons depend on this income. Corporate stockholders who make money off prisoners' work lobby for longer sentences, in order to expand their workforce. The system feeds itself," says a study by the Progressive Labor Party, which accuses the prison industry of being "an imitation of Nazi Germany with respect to forced slave labor and concentration camps."

I'm a very pessimistic man, and have come to accept that the worst case scenario isn't a mere possibility but a likelihood.

I feel stronger than I've ever felt in my life. Maybe it's a Martyr complex. I don't know. Maybe it's the sobriety, the fasting, the introspective thought that's gone into realizing just how shit the planet is and how slothful I've been in my activism.

I just wish I had the money to fight these assholes properly and "beat them to death with their own rules," as a wiser man than me has once said.

Art is long and life is short and success is very far off.

One day I'll have the money to make these cocksucker pay for what they've done. But for now I can only be true to myself and to those that treat me decently.

That's todays word. Decency. When was the last time you've seen it? It's certainly no longer a commonplace staple in today's god-fearing, down-trodden, valueless culturally bankrupt nightmare.

I'll have to look for it when my worries are gone.

P.S.

Thanks for listening. I really do love and respect my freinds here, far more than I've respected anyone I've ever met in the "real world." This planets full of nitwits and assholes. Bluelight hase over 100,000 members. That's what, .02 percent of the world population. You'd think I'd feel more alone, but I don't. I'm glad I have that .02 percent. It's all that keeps me hanging on and fighting this evil shit I deal with everyday.

I don't know why I'm posting this here, I suppose I'm just lonely. I know it's suited for more of a blog post, but I still would like anyones response, advice, wisdom, camaraderie, or whatever may be offered. Selah.
All individuals have dreamed of a heal for the common cold. Researchers from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology have revealed a possible “Superdrug” that might heal any virus under the sun. The drug is long way from human trials but has been successful in killing viruses in mice by attacking genetic materials in viruses.

Source of article:MIT cre-ates Superdrug that could be in the position to get rid of all viruses

Genetic code of viruses targeted by drug

Time reports that the journal PLoS One published an article from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology that has incredible findings. The common cold might now be killed by this superbug called DRACO. It also can kill viruses including hemorrhagic, fevers, polio, and all the strains of influenza. The narcotic targets the genetic information that viruses use to replicate. Ribonucleic acid is what DRACO, or Double-stranded RNA Activated Capsase Oligomerizer, attacks according to MIT news.

Good way to treat illness

When healthy cells become unhealthy and infected they create a double-stranded RNA and then the virus replicates throughout the body. Eventually the infected cells die. The Massachusetts Institute of Technology research started because there are so many drugs out there that target infections, however none that can effectively target viruses. There are medications out there that target specific viruses but none that target a wide spectrum of viral diseases period. One component of DRACO latches onto the double-stranded RNA, or dsRNA, that virus-infected cells produce. The other component initiates a process called apoptosis, or cellular self-destruction. The human body’s natural defenses are triggered by DRACO to discover and destroy the invading cells. However, according to United States News and World Report, DRACO does not destroy any cells in its path, it targets viral dsRNA alone, leaving healthy cells unharmed.

The mouse cure

The study looked at the effects of DRACO in various mammalian cells, including human and mouse, and found the drug was effective in healing 15 different viruses. However, according to United States News and World Report, DRACO is not going to be accessible for some time. The researchers estimate it will be a decade before animal and human trials could have concluded and DRACO will be available for human use.

Citations

Time

MIT News

U.S. News and World Report

CNET

Wikipedia on RNA

Centers for Disease Control
Last night @ no desernable time or place I ingested crystal MDMA. For days before I have been doing nothing but popping a percocet (10mg) and smoking weed constantly. Also in the mix for the first 2 days before I smoked black tar opium rolled up into fuse like strings in joints. They are called Oprah Winfrey's. =D

I began the dose at .05 as I had heard this to be particularly potent. Feeling the effects around 30 minutes in I desided to wait another half hour and dose some more. As time passed and the slightly increasing up began to level off I ate some more. :D

At about 3 hours in I had ingested .12 grm and was quite lovely and humming and with the combined ingestion of all the previous cannabis and opiates disturbing dementia and paranoia ensued.

Went to bed early eager to try .2+ durring the day when I am not so exasperated.8(8(
ok so I got caught 4th of july in canoe with two joints and to keep it brief landed on probation which I got put on last tues the 9th i had to see my po for the first time today. I wasnt expecting a drug screen but I got one needless to say I failed it. She is sending it to a lab to see what the levels where I told her I was going to fail it when she gave it to me. Anyway I have to go back on the 31 thats two wks from today and I need to be able to piss clean all bullshit aside anyone know what I can do to make sure im clean????????????
it seems every time i move, i am all gung-ho about changing all my bad habits. in fact, i prolly wrote a very similar blog entry 3 years ago when i moved the first time.

this time i am trying baby steps, altho i decided to hire a personal trainer. hopefully someone holding me accountable for making shitty choices and helping me figure out how to workout will be good. i hate thinking that people are watching me fumble around or mess up when i go to the gym. i really like that this place is private and i don't feel idiotic when i can't do an exercise.

granted, i have only gone 3 times but i am motivated enough that i have not had random beers just for the sake of having a beer. i am not sure i am an alcoholic, but i have one hell of a habit. i've been tracking calories and i eat about 700-800 calories a day. however i drink about 900-1000 calories. i suppose my low food intake is why i am not insanely fat from all my beer consumption.

when it comes to drinking, i just don't care. for the longest time it was an escape and a way to shut off my brain. now its just a way to pass time. but i am finding that if i don't start drinking, i still find things to do. but i am not going to get too excited, i've mentioned here how i stopped for awhile in seattle. but right now i am not feeling too depressed, so who knows?

work is going well. except the mother is super superstitious and willing to attribute her children's behavior to everything except the kids themselves. amazingly, i am managing to get to work at 6.30am and still be awake when i get home. i'm working longer, earlier hours yet i am getting more done in the evenings. its pretty nice.
He's working with the D.A. to get it dropped down to a violation with no jailtime/record. Large fine, but whatever.

IF the bastard doesn't accept this proposal, then a jury trial awaits.

Fuck it. I can't wait to get on the stand. I could talk my way out anything, especially considering how ridicluous this nonsense is and they will be sure to see a counter suit for emotional damages ad nausea-um. We'll see how it goes. Hearing set for Sep 12 unless they insist on the Misdemeanor then we're going to trial baby one month later.

Fucking swine.


Thanks for all the help and support. I love each and every one of you and just wanted to convey my utmost respect, love, and appreciation for not only the times you've taken to read through my gut-wrenching gibberish but also offer constructive advice, and a shoulder to lean on, so to speak. If the world consisted only of your ilk we wouldn't need these threads like these and we'd be off dancing somewhere.

Beating these fuckers to death with their own rules would be nice, but optimism isn't inherent in my current states.
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