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So I'm about to get my period, yeah tmi but fuck it. I haven't had one in 2mos so its coming on pretty fierce, plus my kidney area hurts like bloody hell, PLUS I ate something funky the other day and I've had horrid tummy pain, fever, cramps, nausea. I don't even want to see food or think about sex My 2 favorite things

I feel so bitchy right now I fucking hate feeling like this. I need my nurse to make me feel better but SHE'S sick too PLUS her girly issues too.

FACK! I wish I could get T to rid me of this horrid curse RIGHTFREAKINNOW!!!.

I feel so damn shitty right now. If my kid wasn't here I would take a seroquil and sleep for the night so I can escape this pain....

Haha I so wish I could write about this stuff on Facebook. But I'm not really a fan of admitting to the general public (i.e. my family) about my drug usage.

Anyway. Today, I realized that I really do love my family. Which seems like a no-brainer, but you don't know the way my family has been for a long time now. No one is close to each other anymore, there is always a ton of tension in the air - really, you could cut it with a knife, no one has any privacy, my parents don't even sleep in the same room, my mom is the ultimate control-freak, we all snap at each other over over everything, and my parents treat me the same. exact. way. as they did when I was 16. After getting out of the military and having lived on my own, coming back, at the same time my brother got out of jail, it's gotten to the point where just being in the same room with any member of my family feels suffocating.

Also, I would just like to take a moment to announce that Coconut Snackers, the ones in those $.99 red candy bags where it's like 2 for $1 or whatever... are way too sweet. But at the same time, the coconut is way too good. I need to put it in ice cream or something, it will be better that way.

But anyway. Despite the fact that being around my family is always really tense and pushes my anxiety and irritation levels to the limit, I do love them. Like, really love them. Which I think we all kind of forget a lot of the time. I mean, my mom says it every once in a while on the phone, but it always seems fake and it feels kind of fake when I say it back as well. But, dude. Life is short. My dad is nearing retirement and is getting old in age, and has a few problems, so I mean... you never know. And if he died tomorrow, or any of my family did, I would have a lot of regrets. We all need to treat each other better. I'm glad I brought it up to my therapist last week.

In my sessions so far, I've only been talking about one thing so far, my experience in the military. (By the way, I've never written the full story on these blogs - just bits and pieces. I will definitely write the full story sometime, though. The message and truth about what actually goes on absolutely needs to be put across, and I've been determined to find ways I can make a difference through my own experiences) Now I feel comfortable with most of it, enough to speak openly and very candidly about it. However, it's been four years. And there are still quite a few demons lurking behind that door. They still haunt me, and it carries over into my every day life - it affects much of my behavior and feelings in a negative way. It's hindering not only my mental growth, but my progression in life as well. It has me caught in a standstill - frozen in time between the past and the present. We have been focusing on learning how to let things go, allowing the grieving process to occur, and giving myself closure. We've talked about the guy I mention in my blogs a few times too, mostly just how to recognize the decisions that are the best ones for my own well-being, instead of others.

But those are all kind of self-centered. Not that I think that's a bad thing - that is the point of therapy after all. But I feel like my priorities have changed, and that maybe now it's a lot more important to focus on fixing things with my family first. I don't want to have any regrets later on in life.

Another thing I realized? I'm a control freak. That's where half my problems stem from, I'm sure - the fact that I have to feel in control of absolutely every situation, or I don't feel comfortable with it. It even boils down to my pill popping... that I need to be in control of my feelings and feel secure at all times, and I ensure this happens by taking pills. That's another thing I definitely want to focus on.

I finished the rest of those coconut stacks as I wrote this. I'm going to be wired lol oh well

Hi Everyone,

I just wanted to make a quick comment on the recent proliferation of short Twitter-esque blog entries. While they're good fun, they do take up valuable real-estate on the front page, while adding virtually nothing in the manner of content. The current layout and interface for Blogs is unfortunately limited by the board software, so there isn't really a way around this other than to respect others' posts by not taking up the front page.

I for one don't want to institute any hard and fast "every post must be at least 141 characters long" rule, but I think that we can all figure out what constitutes a reasonable entry. Things here are pretty lax, so it shouldn't be tough to write something a bit lengthier than a six word post.

Anyway, I just wanted to say my bit on that. If it's been a while since you've done so, please give the Blogs Guidelines a quick read, as this is all covered in there.

And now, back to your regularly scheduled Blogs....



(please post any comments on this below in the reply section-- feedback is always welcome!)

lalalala. all i do is lay on the couch and watch football. i should go buy a_c some coke zero and applesauce instead.

(this is a_c in case that is not obvious. i am testing a few things)

Dude. That song lyric is SO PERFECT for this month. You have no idea.

I don't know if I'm going through a rough patch, or if I've just been having a particularly voluminous amount of shit being thrown at me by this one bitch called life lately, or what. But I do know that it is not good, and that it is becoming harder and harder to stay positive and see the bright side of every situation, and that I'm swallowing more and more pills because of it...

Which is, of course, the main issue with this problem. The fucking pills. I'm headed back down the rabbit hole, except this time it's benzos I'm turning to... and maybe an extra Suboxone strip here and there. I'd kill for a good opiate high. Nothing good is going to come of this if it keeps going on this way, but honestly. I don't know how to fix it anymore. I'm already seeing an addiction specialist, going to therapy, and working toward bettering my own life in other areas... so what the fuck?

You know what it all boils down to... loneliness. I've said it before and I'll say it again and again and again and again - loneliness is the worst feeling in the world. If you knew me in real life, you'd probably be laughing at this right now and wondering how I could possibly be lonely. That's what everyone I DO know in real life does, anyway, when I try to talk about it. But guess what? I DON'T FUCKING KNOW EITHER.

I know I miss **** more than I can even handle sometimes. I know I'm constantly feeling uneasy about this other guy. I know I've been single for two years, and being around couples 24/7... no, literally - 24/7 - EVERYONE I know is either in a relationship or has someone consistent... is starting to weigh on me, and I'm feeling the pressure. But this feeling is worse than just a simple, "Oh, I miss this guy, I'm confused about this other guy, and I'm starting to want a boyfriend." It's straight up emptiness.

Like, it hits me out of no where - alone, with family, with a group of friends - doesn't matter what I'm doing, either. It just strikes when it feels like it, with seemingly no trigger whatsoever. It's a hard feeling to describe, how do you describe the word "empty" in a human being? I can describe an empty glass. I can say: "There is no liquid or any other substance in that glass." But I cannot describe an empty xburtonchic. It's just an overwhelming feeling of loss, meaninglessness, and hopelessness... and, of course, loneliness. I want to cry, scream, and punch a baby all at the same time. But I take pills instead.

I know I'm self medicating. I know I should be writing it down somewhere, or talking about it, or doing yoga. I don't want to take pills. But pills are more effective than yoga or anything else. So I take them. And it works. It's just SO SIMPLE. I can swallow 5 or 6 pills at a time and feel like a whole person again within a half an hour. Amazing. Of course, benzos don't work as well as opiates do... but, you know. Opiates don't get me high anymore because of the fucking Suboxone, so I'll take what I can get.

I get this feeling every once in a while. And yes, I always fill the hole by taking pills. The problem is, I've been getting this feeling almost EVERY SINGLE DAY this past month. It's like all of my positive vibes are draining away with the sun. And the problem with this being in every day sort of thing is that I'm short... WAY short... on both my Suboxone and Xanax scripts this month.

I'm going through some sick depression type thing, and all I can worry about is running out of pills before my refill. Cool.

What the fuck.

Anyways. I need some advice, Bluelight. Because running out of Suboxone is one thing, but running out of benzos when I've been taking up to (at most) 12 a day sometimes (though it's usually only 6 or so, but who's counting) is dangerous. My addiction specialist is pretty cool. Do you guys think I should schedule an earlier appointment? Explain what's going on? He's an addiction specialist - he deals with addicts. He has to understand. I mean, everyone has their rough spots right? Almost every addict regresses at one point or another in their recovery, don't they? It's not like I'm taking them to get high. Well, technically, I am. But not for recreational purposes. I'm taking them so I can get a couple hours relief from that constant gaping, aching feeling I have in my chest that never goes away. Believe me, I've tried everything. Yoga. A chamomile/St John's Wort/Valerian Root/Gaia Melissa Lemon Balm tea. Breathing techniques. Exercise. Writing. Talking. None of it works. Pills work, though. Pills work quite beautifully.

So should I talk to my addiction specialist about this, or what?

I really don't know anymore. About anything. Except that I'm tired of this feeling. And I'm really tired of needing to take copious amounts of pills in order to fix it. The only thing I've learned is that before I try to fight this particular demon, I have to find and confront the ones hiding in my closet. I guess all I can hope for is that this isn't going to be a lifelong battle - that it's just a temporary thing, and that maybe it will just all go away soon...

makes me life complete.

I'm a Bluelighter...=[View attachment 10224

I have never really been into comic books, but I watched the Ninja Turtles religiously as I was younger, but nothing prepared me for the Watchmen Directors cut bluray. To my knowledge the turtles lacked genitalia and thank god for that, because working nunchucks with your package dangling can really create adverse undulation.

Heman was about as homoerotic as I thought adolescent boy cartoon crap could get... I have learned a few things in the last 24 hours(Atleast Heman rode a big pussy.... cat).

Watchmen: a sexual synopsis. A few women in latex in cutscenes and flashbacks. There are two lesbians, but you get to see them bloody and dead, very nice to see the advances of Women's liberation come to the silver screen. The only striking female nudity I can recall was that $6 hooker, as you can imagine not very palatable. Speaking of hookers, one guys mom was a hooker that would beat him when he voyeured her making money... porn and child abuse SCORE. Some ridiculous fight scenes, and a midget who is the top-dawg in a prison, his end gets bloody in the prison John... surprise surprise.

Child molestation is also mentioned, plus there is a near rape scene on a pool table(The polite man does not puff on his cigar while beating her face thankfully).Then there was about 5 minutes of pendulous blue CGI cock on the dysmorphic Dr. ManJeremy(I bet this gets extended in the Watchmen Part Deux to 9 minutes). There were three hetero luffin scenes as I recall. The first involved this VERY sensual line spoken by a woman, "You're fingers taste like batteries...". The second delt with the very pertinent issue of erectile dysfunction, which is a chronic concern for the 40 something cartoon/comic enthusiast living in his mother's basement. The third featured an excessively long slow-rhythm wrangling in a space ship, the guy looked somewhat like Daniel Baldwin... fast-forward for the win.

If you liked Gran Turino or Crystal Pepsi, you may like this movie

maybe it's just me, i don't know. this person just called me and yelled at me. he's owed me over $100 for a couple months now. at one point he said to come over, and totally stood me up. apparently he thought i could handle that shit. funny thing is i told him from the beginning i am not a dealer, i've always been straight up with him, always tried to be nice to him. no, i can't deal with people lying to my face over and over again. excuse me.

my best friend, how does one go from saying he wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for me to 'why should i?' go to a check cashing place when he can wait till monday so he can have someone deposit it and give him the cash? because i need money now? because i'd do it for you ten times over? whatever. what the fuck ever.

today is folsom street fair. last year i went with my gay friend. we had a great time. now we aren't friends anymore. i miss him. every day.

maybe it is me, maybe they're all right and i'm the one who's fucked up.

I see dead people

(part II)

Maybe you just fell asleep watching a movie where some girl got sexually abused? I mean really I have no other explanation for these people. But this is the fourth time I've been told this variety of sexual abuse in a way that just made me want to vomit all over myself in disgust. Call me an evil fucking person. But I believe there are things in this world even worse than sexual abuse, and its people like this. People that lie about the shit for pity. Going out and getting drunk, posting skimpy photos of themselves only weeks after it happened.... its insulting to people like me. No you are not just responding to trauma differently, there is not even a single shred of evidence that coincides with you actually being sexually abused. Go fucking talk to victims of violent crime. You will notice A LOT more similarities within the groups. Anger and hostility you will find in A LOT of them. Because its much harder to lie about something like that. Theres generally scars and blood, dead relatives, and not just some story about how your bf might have got too aggressive with you one night.

And THAT SHIT was the most insulting (already kinda referenced to this story above a few paragraphs). I once read this on BL, someone (whos name I won't mention) saying their sexual abuse involved them saying no while in the bed naked, and their bf being aggressive, and then them still having sex with their bfs. Like some casual 2 step occurence. But then afterwards they now claim they were somehow sexually abused. I'd be more worried about paranoid schizophrenia if I was telling stories like that not fucking sexual abuse.

Give me a fucking break. You are an insult to real sexual abuse survivors. I had my fucking innocence ripped from my own hands with no choice at 10 years old all the way till I was 12. And you mean to tell me you THINK you were sexually abused cause you didn't really wanna have sex with your bf one night and said no ONE time, but STILL sat there in bed with the man you've been dating for x years and obviously were comfortable with, and still HAD SEX with him? You really couldn't say no a second time? Not like you were scared he's your bf. And even worse he knows about your apparent past abuse. But then you come on here and tell people you think you were sexually abused? And still continue to date the fucking guy?

You are a fucking fraud pure and simple. You are not a victim of sexual abuse you are a victim of being an idiot and you make me sick to my fucking stomach. SAY NO AGAIN! How is your absolute passiveness over sex = to sexual abuse? Some guys are very aggresive in bed no shit. But when you sit there and still have sex with him, after you say no once then go tell the world "poor me I think I was abused" and go on telling people hes a "great" guy... I'm sorry but I don't have a shred of sympathy for you. Thats you having no fucking backbone that is NOT sexual abuse. And that is you being as fucked up of a person as I can imagine someone being. Have some fucking responsibility for your OWN decisions and stop inventing scenarios that sound fucking shady to everyone that hears them.

And THIS is why I do not talk about sexual abuse on this forum. Like I just have to believe every story I hear and feel bad for the person. Fuck that. If you're going to try passing that shit off on people I'm talking about it. I think its fake, I think its bullshit. No maybe not all 4 stories I suspect personally, but some people out there are absolutely making this shit up and are doing a horrible job at it. Sexual abuse is not something you fucking figure out one day magically. And if you haven't figured it out by now why the hell not just drop it already?

Its only going to make you start to assume that you are more fucked up than you likely are. And maybe thats the real explanation of what happened. Or maybe I'm a cruel & cold bastard. But this has been on my mind for a while now, and the story I heard today at work set me off. I need to vent this shit because if I don't I'm going to wind up saying something directly to the "victims". And I definitely couldn't do that. So I'm writing this shit here for anyone that wants to know what goes through Bo's head on a daily basis. Or anyone that can actually remember their sexual abuse stories and just so happens to get angry at this trauma repression bs that seems to be springing up in so many different forms latey.

Maybe I'm right, maybe I'm wrong, but I really believe a lot more women make this shit up than people understand or are willing to talk about. And when the story is told a certain way I really think people need to be confronted. Sexual abuse is when someone forces themselves on your sexually. Its something that most people remember, and that most people don't really even need to talk about. I realize that some do, and thats fine, but the ones that almost gloat about this shit, and talk about it 5 times a week, even scenarios that seem so outright obviously fake... fuck.... I really don't know what to say. Cause if it is fake, and you are making it up, that is one of the lowest fucking things I could ever imagine a person doing.

It's funny, I haven't drank alcohol in months, having instead been indulging in what was, at one point in time, a superior intoxicant, and the two shots of bourbon I've consumed so far have gotten me higher and numbed my back pain more than my last 60mg dose of hydrocodone did...

Opiates are deceptive little demons like that. A casual drinker can numb himself into obliteration, and feel the consequences of his actions the very next morning. But, it seems clear to me, there is no such thing as a casual opiate abuser... The consequences of opiate abuse are never fully realized until you're waking up in the middle of the night with mucous dripping from your nose and eyes, your entire body trying to wriggle away from itself in a maddening sensation of starving to death, barely able to push yourself up out of bed to hobble to the toilet before you shit your pajamas...

And that devil is there to stay... There to whisper sweet, flowery nothings into your ear, making you repeat the same cycle of feeding that blissful warmth which has seemingly replaced your very blood, and thence from that ever-diminishing heaven into the ever-increasing hell...

I am, at this moment, despite dipping back into old comforts, "starving to death"... No sympathy from the devil, Mr. Jones... And just a little bit from his assistant, Mr. Daniels, heh... What can I say, it's an abusive love triangle.

Some little part of me still believes there's a way to escape this selfish hell, and wonders how to... But I know another twisted little part of me will always prefer the warmer weather...

If the sin of gluttony had a physical incarnation, it would surely be the opium poppy...

the am is a different time, just another monster waiting on flexed calves for that precise moment when the flood gates open. that's not me at all i say somewhere from the bloody back banks of my mind. the front is far too busy piling briefcases full of vinegar which fall continuously, seeping into my nose, my mouth, and coating the language that blunders on.
what? man the controls god dammit. the implosion feels damn good. i mixture of orgasm and fine swimming on a day when something else is what you should be doing. and by god do i love to do the unexpected. who's for mediocrity anymore anyhow? who exhibits exuberant restraint besides those guys with the puffy hats the queen of england hired for good measure?
hilarious thoughts can dance their fine tunes all along my brain stems but cutting right through is the damned truth. im a jibbering idiot. a rattling buffoon on wheels too bat shit nuts to realize i miss something else.

morning rituals severely disturbed. i cant handle that kind of chaos. my god man just let me have my steaming beverage with words. allow this thing that's been going on for a quarter of my life span to continue without interruption. inside that beastly bastard waits. inside there's a world of green circles and kart wheeling politicians. inside you can call yourself an angel and get away with murder. but when the gateway morphs into a monkey wrench well, the cat just fucks the bag.

I feel stupid right now. I hate that I have no life and pretty much a loner and the friends I do have even my gf who knows no one here, has more of a life. I feel so clingy to people at times because of the fact I have no life. I spend so much time alone at home doing nothing really that when i do hang out with people I dont want to let them go. I feel like I will lose them somehow. I know rationally its my BPD and not reality but ...blah@!

I hate feeling so clingy but I hate being alone but I dont want people feeling obligated to hang out with me.

I feel a little depressed right now.


Monkey on my back, go away, go away.

I showed this blog to my friend Brittany and she really liked it. We have been sending blogs to each other via pm's on facebook. It is kind of fun.

Brittney hooked me up with a cool ass chick about a month or two ago and I kind of fucked it up. I didn't REALLY fuck it up but something happened and we both made a mistake, and I got most of the blame for it.

Well all of a sudden I have started to miss her again. The first month was pretty hurtful because I had high expectations and my hopes and aspirations for the relationship (what could have been) pretty much got smashed against the wall. I feel much better now but I keep seeing her pictures lately. Brittany put a picture of them on Facebook. I also saw a picture of her on my friends facebook. She was wearing a black dress and just really looking good. It didn't really do much, but now I kind of miss her. Not really tho, I am just lonely, and at times like this, I miss whatever I can.

I slept in today. Until around 2pm. The bad thing is that I was still tired so I fell asleap again and didn't wake up until like 8pm. It is going to be a long night. Its cool though because I have a lot of friends I am talking to.

Oh yeah I got a phone call from my friend angie who is in jail right now. We are really good friends, and she is sexy as fuck and has an awesome music taste. Also she is an artist. I kind of just see her as a friend but there has been a couple times where she has called me wanting dick but I never could find a ride. She lives about 45 minutes away. Last time I saw her she smoked a blunt of chronic with me and got me wired. She was really whored up too because she was going to visitation to see her man. The collect call was bad ass, it went like this:

"You have a collect call from : I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU!!"

See u soon

out of sight, out of mind

just another ex girfriend.

lol remember while you were driving back home today from alecs house after blazing, you had this moment of clarity going 35 passing ruth musser. getting over an addiction is just how you get over an ex. yeah obviously its going to be hard and it will take awhile. You might slip and call her or check up on her once in awhile, but no matter what things can never go back to how they used to be. She moved on, so should you. It takes months and months to get over an ex that you truly cared about. someone you devoted most of your life too. Its not going to be easy but you just got to keep it out of your sight then it will be out of mind. don’t look back cause its only going to make it harder…life is all about the decisions you make. MAKE THE RIGHT DECISIONS and live life to the fullest. be good to yourself, be good to your parents and love your God at all cost…cause nothing else matters.

I am really glad the anniversary of 9/11/01 fell on a Sunday this year. *Shakes head* I just don't want to hear about it! Esp. not today. Yes, I know it was scary. Yes, I know how much of an impact it had. I was old enough at the time to be aware that this was some serious shit going down--I don't need you reminding me each and every year with your "woe is me" crap even though you were only effected on the national-level! Did you know anyone who died because they worked there? Did you know anyone who went into the building and died because of it? No? Then do NOT complain to me about how much it impacted your life.

And on that note, I think the biggest image of that day that sticks with me is of the people jumping out of the building. I remember hearing a reporter on the radio my Science teacher had quietly going (with a student standing watch at the door for the principal who took away the TVs 'cause he felt we [8th grade] were "too young to know what's going on") say something along the lines of, "And now there appears to be some sort of--Those are people! There are people jumping from the building!"

:-/

i'm pretty pleased that i am making progress and still able to have fun when i want to. it seems like most of these posts revolve around drinking (or not drinking); i did not realize how much i drank until i made a conscious effort to stop.

but i am pretty happy with the results so far... i've lost about 10 pounds of fat and gained 2 pounds of muscle. but more than that, i feel decent when i wake up at the ass crack of dawn and have energy to make it through the day. i am still lame and pass out around 10.30pm tho. however i am noticing more flexibility and i am slightly stronger. i'm even thinking of joining a gym to get better cardio workouts in!

It reminds me of Pokemon cards or Magic cards from when I was in, like, middle school. Pikachu for Squirtle? Why not?!

I traded a friend a decent amount of klonopin for a decent amount of oxycodone. It works well both ways. Technically free drugs. I am enjoying those free drugs as I write this. It's been about 2 weeks without oxycodone so I was fiending pretty hard. Sad, right? Although my teeny tiny tolerance has been a good thing. I'm only on about 45mg of oxycodone and 3mg of clonazepam and feeling great.

How come when you're opiate-naive you get all nauseous and can't even think about eating but then when you've had a tolerance and a habit, you almost need opiates in order to be able to eat? And you crave the shittiest food on earth. Like, McDonald's dollar menu shitty.

I guess things are looking up drug wise. At least until I finish my last 30mg of oxycodone. I did 90mg in less than 24 hours. I'm a real fucking vacuum cleaner when it comes to this shit. When I don't have any, everything sucks. I just go through the motions of life. When I do have opiates, I don't have a fucking care in the world. This morning I was all "boohoo I need therapy, I need a job" -- now, at least for the next ~6 hours or so, I will be like... LIFE IS AWESOME! And it's all an illusion. But I like that illusion. It's one I can live with, until the drugs wear off. Then where am I? Back to where I started. Vicious fucking cycle...

Just a couple days ago I was eating tramadol and suboxone and feeling sorry for myself. Deep down, I still am feeling sorry for myself but these pills make it worthwhile. Knowing I have them and knowing they're around somehow makes things better.

I'm going to chill out, eat my fucking McChicken and watch pirated episodes of Breaking Bad... and maybe get some homework done. Hahaha.

I love you like grave danger
Like moon shining disguise
Mmm hmm
When I wake up with your makeup
And spread blush cross the sky

Like a meteor crush
I'm gonna tell the world
Been a million years full of tears
But I found my girl

My notion of love devotion
Was a corrosion of mind
Mmm hmm
Then come cupid and now I’m stupid
And I feel it’s just fine

Like exploding face
I’m gonna tell the world
Been a million years full of fears
But I found my girl

It’s a spun tongue
It’s a holy shit
It’s a loud cry from the heart
It’s a live death
It’s a big breath
It’s a no more we’re apart

Like a rainbow crash
As we bow and swirl
Been a million years full of tears
But I found my girl

Like exploding sun
Let the light unfurl
Been a million years full of fears
But I found my girl

I can't seem to get this song out of my head. I guess it's cause how I feel ATM. It's been so good thus far, it's like a dream. Like above words ring true. I never imagined being this happy.

amazing! acudetox.com & my training make me know i'm not crazy! keep guiding me sweetheart! i miss u so....

can't sleep.
go outside to have a smoke. light. drag. space-out for a min.
awareness.
horrible distant ungodly metallic grinding noise, down the wet ave. huh? chevy tahoe drags a bare, seized alloy wheel past at 30. hits the next light and silence.
wait.... wtf??
coming back the other way, nasty gouging sound..... and there he goes, past, and back down the ave.... laying waste to bling rim on wet pavement.
two johnny laws leisurely roll by a few minutes later, and a drunk crosses wobbly on a bicycle behind them. ..... ah well, time for another smoke.
10 minutes later....
what the fuck?? here it comes again.....

he goes by, then around the block, and now he's coming back. the chevy grinds past 4th time wheel a ragged nub now. to the opposite block, thru a red, and fades off in the rain. *yawn*

half an hour.....
AGAIN...... going towards downtown. the alloy wheel gone, steel spindle & rotor glowing orange. no prowl-cars for miles.

that's it, I'm going to bed.

Today I did a blog, it was like...all bloggy n stuff %)

hey i ordered a few things from theladyjane and a few ,biz sites but anyone knoz any sites to get oxys that wont scam me again thanks