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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AT A BAD RAVE WHEN...

now wats this shit abt H and K?
*looks as stern as possible*
anyways pimpie, im glad u've migrated to BL.
*big HUGs wif little paws*
to keep this on-topic,
u noe u're at a bad rave when
- there r heaps of colorful wonky-wearers but they're all sitting down along the sides the entire nite, stoned out or too drug-fuct.
- when these same colorful pple preach PLUR, but snarl at pple who dun look as cool as they do.
- when the "wogs" r rocking harder than any1 else. (ps. i love them wogs!)
- when the music sounds like 1 long track the entire nite, n u couldnt tell when they changed djs.
- when the 1 long track sounds like shoes in the dryer.
- when the floor is carpeted wif rubberised material which shoes STICK to.
- when the djs r spinning love songs, n ask pple to slow dance "wif the nearest person beside u!"
- when the lyrics to the love songs r projected on the wall... "come on party pple! sing-along!"
*waves little paws*
>o.0<
------------------
~littleHKlaserTriPPeR~
 
The DJ has to stop the music to change the record
The Record is actually a CD
The DJ is DJ Tad "70s Funk" From Neighbours
The organiser is the guy from neighbours who said "this is not a rave maaaaaann"
You have to listen to a whole Midro set without hearing Magnum Force
Jayse Knipe doesn't play Belfast
The headliner is anastacia and her "Disc Jockey" (i hate that chic)
Oh yeah, and the chic from russel gilbert show
They only sell coke(acola)
The play "the launch" (use whiny teenybopper voice)
you try and dance but get guidos asking who you are dancing with
the only drugs present are tobacco, and if you spark up, the party will be cancelled and your parents called
You are at Chasers
you are the only one there and you are sitting alone in a huge hall with a discman and the rats start to doof but then you realise you are really at chasers and you just fell asleep and you were dreaming
Someone comments that they should be playing the vengaboys
They call britney spears "Dance"
i hate teenyboppers
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"we were somewhere around barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the drugz began to take hold" Hunter S. Thompson
 
when you want to get down those tight little pants of that hot girly dancing next to you and smiling at you, but then you remember you're at a rave and girls hate being hit on at raves and she's only smiling at you because she's peaking
hmm i guess ive got a lot of issues to work out hehe
------------------
"My god has a bigger dick than your god." -George Carlin
 
You start seeing losers from your work there
When the party is in Cranbourne (ewwwwwww)
and most of the people there are from Cranbourne.
When you find out that no one there has even heard of Richie Hawtin (for fuck sakes)
When you realise that the party is held in your old school hall with all of these guys from another school that you can't stand.
When Jason Midro turns up to the party at your old school and manages to park his house boat on the Yarra next to your school
When you realise that Kylie Minogue is there wasted.
When your Dad is there drunk as a skunk.
When the only place you could get tickets for this was in Dandenong.
I'll be back later.
BTW I did NOT go to school in Cranbourne.
------------------
Paranoia is my security blanket.
[This message has been edited by pekkie (edited 10 October 2000).]
 
pekkie, the skoolhall thing reminds me of sumthing.
i can nvr stand partying in a "skool-ish" place.
which is why i didnt go to WET003 n why im not going to WET004. which was n will be held in MY CURRENT skoolhall. ewwww
where u're not allowed to smoke, where theres not enuf space, where fresh young uns get their orientation lecture, where student groups hold boring dinners n get-togethers.
im not a very "skool" person...
*waves little paws*
>'.'<
------------------
~littleHKlaserTriPPeR~
 
ghost~ no man.. i didnt say HK did i? coulda meant halcyon knights!! but yeah
wink.gif

you know your at a bad rave when.....
the local gringos turn up and threatn to cut you cuz you hit on their head honchos "chickita"
when there are boob tubes and mini skirts aplenty, and 12 year olds are wearing them
when you can take your 10 year old cousin, and he dresses as mini me
when you eat 'cid and become a creature of the netherworlds, and start gnawing on your best friends ankle
when you get a massage, and the massuse hits on you (hey, that aint so bad!!)
when there is a cavity search at the door (i HATE the sound of those gloves being snapped on!!)
when you walk out of it completely jaded in the "scene" and whip out a shottie and start thinning the crowd
wink.gif

when you hear the newest n*sync track, and you realise your actually at a disco
when you rock up to find a band playing, renditions of spandau ballet
when the wedding you went to last week had a better laser show
when the laser show is actually the little red dot that powers up the "adopt-a-dot"
when the coolest thing to drink is straight red cordial, but better whatch out those chaperones dont catch you dosing up! they'll call your mommy and daddy
when that straight red cordial goes to your head and you start a strip tease....
when you give a 12 year old a lap dance
and he slips $10 in your g-string
and says "so, how bout you meet me later tonight?"
this 12 year old is quite the lecerous little boy... but hes the best looking thing in the place!!
daymn red cordial!!
aiight.. nuff said !!
xox wiSdoMiKaL
 
When you get some drunk ass wanker trying to hit on you (that's happened to me ewwwww)
When everyone there has yo yo's and they hit you on the head.
When the floor turns into chicken fat
When Coca Cola and McDonalds sponsors it.
When it's infested with pimpled faced geeks who are dead ugly.
When the slinkies turn into big spiraly stairs that cross into each other and you can't get anywhere.
When you realise that you're in the middle of Kuta and someone calls out "Hey honey you want giggolo????"
When all of these Balinese start crowding over you and start platting your hair.
When you realise that the music is actually coming from Yahoo chat and they're playing Happy Hardcore.
I'll be back with more.
------------------
What will you kids think of next
 
I actually didn't think you were pimply faced and ugly, but maybe I was wrong.
------------------
What will you kids think of next
 
What about when you turn up to a rave EXPECTING to hear good music, and you hear "Jason CAN I HAVE A MICROPHONE! I LOVE MY OWN VOICE! Midro" and "Will-e-tell me he's not playing the same set again", spinning back the records as fast as can constantly, with 200 screaming candy-assed ravers screaming and yelling, when you realise you could have had your own party with your two mates who areunknown (due to MELBOURNE ATTITUDE) DJ's who could wipe the floor with both of these two CANDY ASSES!
(Ok ill settle down now but the truth hurts - me!)
------------------
And thats the Bottom Line.
 
Tantras you should have gone to Where The Wild Things Are
smile.gif
.
------------------
What will you kids think of next
 
Pekkie tell me something I dont know! My two mates played there, hassled me to come and I didnt and now im pretty cursing. Next time tho, next time
------------------
And thats the Bottom Line.
 
Unfortunately that's how the cookie crumbles.
------------------
Welcome to Melbourne.
Where suckling pig doesn't exist :).
 
where suckling pigs dont exist but we might be able to make our own
*looks at Hamlet*
oh, and theres no shortage of peking (peaking) ducks.
>o.0<
------------------
~littleHKlaserTriPPeR~
 
aww man, i wasnt even thinking of that until u said it, now the image has stuck...
btw, "suckling" a pig involves painful procedures of many hrs of roasting...
*beats brains wif little paws*
>0.0<
------------------
~littleHKlaserTriPPeR~
 
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