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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AT A BAD RAVE WHEN...

When DC talks or some other christian new age band are on at 12-1am
When there are a group of youth counsellors at a rave giving out drug awareness brochures and telling you that if you start feeling paranoid you can come to them and then you start to dry retch and you drop the pamphlet they give you.
That one's true, happened to a friend of mine who had a PMA pill
umm... what else?
When the police close it down twice because of the trash that hang around the front starting fights and drinking and shooting up H
That one is true as well. Happened at Winter Breaks. Didn't go but heard about it.
When a friends loses 9 pills
True also
When you lose your pills at the train station on the way there
again, true (luckily I found them again but I was so stressed that I considered not going)
When there is a love triangle between some friends of your and they all disappear and you try to find them but can't and you start thinking along the lines that they all murdered each other
True
Fuck, when I think about it a lot of bad things have happened to/around me at a rave
Oh and another thing that stuck in my mind that happened at a rave at Scitech last year was when I saw someone overdose on what was most probably herion right in front of me. His friends was trying to hit everyone that came close to him to help and everyone was screaming at each other "Call the fucking ambulance" and his so-called friend started getting really agro and punching everyone.
That was really bad. Probably one of the first things that I've ever seen happen
 
when everybody's drinking stoli's
when two thirds of them are chicks in 5-inch stilettos that don't seem to understand that dancing requires movement
when you see the same group of chix in the toilets sitting having an in-depth discussion of what's new in B magazine
when there still there three hours later - haven't moved. $20 for a chat in the ladies??
I'll lease my loo for half the price! (any interested ladies please email me immediately)
when a chuppa-chup costs a $1, and bottled water $4
when guys seem to instantly assume your going home with them tonight simply because you've spoken to them for more than 5 minutes (seriously!)
when the pills you drop are giving you charge but you never actually peak
peakin',sweatin', dancin', and being unsatiably horny... and no one to share it with...
frown.gif

I'm sure there's more.
 
You know you're at a bad rave when:
1. You're the only person there over 18 and the whole thing looks like that last school disco that you went to in 1988.
2. The bouncer is Molly Meldrum.
3. That chick with the spiky wonky wear pants from "Bardot" is the door bitch. ( I have the same pants, but I bought mine in 1998 - so there!)
4. Molly Meldrum walks into the toilet while you're in there and asks if he can watch. *wink wink!*
5. The party is at a High School located in Broadmeadows.
6. The sounds of the wogs in their commodores honking their novelty horns in unison sounds better than the music coming from inside.
7. All the girls there look like they just walked out of a "Five" concert.
8. All the guys have mullets, extremely tight acid wash jeans, flannelette checkered
shirts, moccasins and cans of VB in one hand and the other hand up in the air.
9. They have torches with different coloured cellophane over them.
10. Everyone has trails of drool coming out of their mouth and is dancing in such an unco-ordinated state that couldn't be matched by Boris Yeltsin after a few too many stolli's.
11. The scalpers outside are giving you the tickets for free.
12. Everyone's parents come to pick them up at midnight. "Now, you didn't drink any alcohol did you?"
13. You see your dad spinning some vinyl on the decks in front of you, with Jason Midro next to him with his fist pounding away in the air. "Are you all hardcore???!!!"
14. Your dad's playing his favorite record -
"West Side Story, limited broadway edition."
15. The vengabus is double parked next to your car.
16. Your thirteen year old brothers friends beat you up outside, steal your "ADD pills" and shove your glowstick up your ass.
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"Out of all the things I have lost I miss my mind the most."
 
The only dealers you can find in the whole place are from Endeavour Hills
wink.gif

It's being held in a carpark
The DJ stops every five minutes to ask his mate for help
There's chubby women in strapless dresses with more rolls than a bakery being hit on by drunk guys
People are dancing in circles
It takes an hour to cross the dancefloor to get the toilet
A bottle of water costs $5, they take the lid and there's only hot water in the toilets
You feel like you just walked into Heat Nightclub
Your pill tastes somewhat like chalk
You notice more than one woman wearing a Leopard Skin mini-skirt
(Unfortunately all 100% true, but funny anyway
smile.gif
If you don't laugh, you cry!!)
Dan
 
Everyones doing the macarena
Everyone is talking about how *hardcore* those v and red bull drinks are
no water - vb only, in stubbie form
You realise you were just sold panadol for $50
...it makes you feel better than you usually do after dropping
The strobe is commodores flicking high beams
you get escorted out for being "on something"
...they call your parents
...they're upset
...because it was the bowls club sunday roast dinner
...and you took your shirt off and rubbed all over 70 year old spinsters on the dancefloor
People are taking their shirts off (sorry, but fuck i hate those terry tough guys)
They play Fatboy slim "Praise you" non-stop
Girlfriend mag are doing interviews for "10 ways to turn your bf into a hardcore raver"
...they don't even ask you (i know you'd be upset)
smile.gif

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"I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs, and insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me." - Hunter S. Thompson
 
You ask someone if they're a bluelighter and they direct you to a broken UV tube...
You rock up, to find your car is louder than the whole party...
Your mum and dad have beaten you there to 'avoid the rush'...
You see the DJ enter the venue on his bike, wearing a Santana T-shirt..
You then realise its your brother..
You aren't bag searched, but rather checked for red cordial stains around your mouth..
The lighting show is run by 'George', who borrows your keyring laser to provide 'some really tripped out and whacky effects' he says..
Your bagsearched on the wayout...
 
when a death metal night is held on the same night, in a room 50 metres away. (sorry plastikman, I couldnt help myself) (yes folks, that IS true, happened at kryal)
 
Sorry Mr. Horse about the music in the bar at Kryal. I promise nothing like that will happen again. Just wondering about the crowd on Saturday, do you think youd mind more people (bigger capacity) at the next one?
Dont worry BEsErKEr not as big as H******E!!
 
When the fat, ugly 45yr old pro who is looking for a trick next to your parked car, & has just finished telling you about the abscess in her tooth, looks at you suggestively & asks, "so, you lookin for a lady tonight?"
 
Don't apologise to me...I had nothing to do with it!
I think the party rocked, even with the meathead reunion nearby. It kind of makes you appreciate what you've got and what you could have...
 
When the number of undercover D's is more than the number of actual ravers....
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In a time of ancient gods, warlords and kings... a land in turmoil cried out fo a hero.... she was xena- a mighty princess forged in the heat of battle.
The power, the passion, the danger ..... her courage would change the world.
 
You pay $130 for a ticket to see the sickest fucking dj in the world and can't even dance because some cunt thought 20,000 people would fit in sheds 2 and 4. you pay $6 for a water and can't see your dick in front of you when you go for a piss in the toilet, cos there's no light and you leave a CK and a Hoffman in there cos you're too off ya guts........
Good night otherwise
 
yeah good point Decimal Dan when Midro is playing
smile.gif
he really is getting shitter and shitter by the day and the worst thing is he is up himslef!!!!!!!
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Bars.
 
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