This tells you something though Brimz...about how good peeps are managing their mental health issues. About how hard the journey is...
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The EADD Mental Health Support Thread
- Thread starter brimz
- Start date
This tells you something though Brimz...about how good peeps are managing their mental health issues. About how hard the journey is...
Mugz
Bluelighter
I don't think that was the reason he developed them, I thought it was to cure a problem that was not really as much mental health related but pain related. No need to go into that though really, neither me or you should be making statements like this about the reasons why someone else developed those chemicals, know when to just keep quiet mate.
Please don't give up on the thread brimz! I feel that you have a lot to contribute mate! I'm sorry your feeling that your mental health is getting worse mate. I hope your feeling better soon 
I'm not too bad today, feeling a little bit more positive than I usually do, I have my psychologist on Thursday and my cbt is really going well! It's helping me to challenge what are essentially irrational thoughts, which I'm finding I have a lot of!
I'm not too bad today, feeling a little bit more positive than I usually do, I have my psychologist on Thursday and my cbt is really going well! It's helping me to challenge what are essentially irrational thoughts, which I'm finding I have a lot of!
charlie clean
Bluelighter
Your leg can't be helping your psyche, brimz. You can't separate mind from body - 'mind over matter' rarely works when you're sick..
How are we defining 'mental health' here? Is there a degree of socio-cultural judgement involved? Who's unhappy and who's depressed?
With whom would you be more comfortable? An entertaining, non violent psychiatric patient or a Nurse Ratchett type ward orderly? The latter may better fit a societal role model but are they in better mental health?
If you're neither violent nor dishonest, you're sane. If you've 'mental' problems, it just means there's something you're not seeing straight.
How are we defining 'mental health' here? Is there a degree of socio-cultural judgement involved? Who's unhappy and who's depressed?
With whom would you be more comfortable? An entertaining, non violent psychiatric patient or a Nurse Ratchett type ward orderly? The latter may better fit a societal role model but are they in better mental health?
If you're neither violent nor dishonest, you're sane. If you've 'mental' problems, it just means there's something you're not seeing straight.
That something "straight" being who's definition?
Hmmm...exactly.
I'm annoying myself re-reading Game Theory in economics, never mind how its been applied elsewhere
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
brimz
Bluelighter
It took a while but finally someone managed to actually get some perspective on one of the main reasons i'm feeling mentally fragile .
It's not the only reason but it' s defo not helping .
I think i've got Post-thrombotic syndrome , seeing as the scan didn't reveal a clot .
Still i get to see my GP on friday so until then , theirs not a great deal i can do except stay sober , keep my leg elevated and make sure i do light excercise
Darksidesam
Bluelight Crew
I think i actually need ketamine to survive. I have manic depression and i have these mad swings of ups and downs. Atm the ketamine isn't getting a proper chance to work on me, as im on doxycycline (1 more to take YIPEEEEEEEEEEEE)
Its a CYP450 inhibitor, which is an important enzyme when it comes to do with ketamine and anti depressant effects, im just getting by atm with exercise.
I had a 3 week break without any ketamine when i started it and near the end of the second week / start of and all of the 3rd week every day id have around 5 hours where i was planning how im going to lay on the train rails and let it chop my head off, surely ill only live for 5 seconds?
What a good way to go THEN i looked at my dog and felt sad i cant leave him i love my dog so i decided to stay around for him.
Felt these mood swings EVERY FUCKING DAY so i gave in and done some ket.
Exercise and Ketamine are the only 2 things that seem to stabilise my mood, i see my GP and all he does is throw SSRI's like citalopram at me. MY SEROTONIN SYSTEM IS FUCKING FINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I should just tell him "Dude i have a better time than anyone ive ever known to on mdma, so therefor all that serotonin im releasing means i must have plenty of it"
My problem is dopamine related because when im due my dose, (say 250mg) i dont believe in doing it daily thats BOLLOCKS or even every few days, you dont need to thats just addictive behaviour and a waste of ketamine.
When i do my dose, nothing. few hours after i pick up.
Symptoms start to appear around the 10 day mark of my last dose of ketamine. (200mg - 300mg)
- Suicidal thoughts, very realistic plans
- Extremely low self esteem
- Feeling of Impending Doom
- Low motivation to do anything
- Low concentration ability
- Very Irritable
- Uncooperative
- Low energy
Or for the other half of the day then, i may be:
- Happy with thoughts that i will get somewhere in life
- Extreme bursts of energy and restlessness
- able to peform tasks faster
When ive had my weekly dose of ketamine ive found this my results:
- Increased Concentration
- Mood generally more stable
- Increased energy
- increased effort with almost everything
- Increased speed at doing things
- Increased accuracy with doing tasks
- Heightened Self esteem and a better opinion of myself
- More positve thoughts and much less and less severe negative thoughts
Other things that can give me a similar 'Pick me up' to the effects of ketamine doing its magic is:
- Weight Lifting/exercising
- Seeing friends (Sometimes, not all the time, sometimes it makes it worse)
I'm not even always after the 'K-Hole' when i do a high dose of ketamine like that, i am mainly after the beautiful afterglow, which i can describe feels like the last 20 minutes of MDMA in waves, but it feels like that all day and a much lesser extent the next day, and so on, but that sorts me out all week.
Without it , i am FUCKED.
I honestly think if i wasnt able to do it at all, id just continue with my plans of suicide that i had for many years and long before i ever used ketamine.
Ketamine is a Dopamine Reuptake Inhibitor, which i find most effective in keeping my spirits high.
I did try the daily dosing thing, all it did was turn me into a ketamine addict that lasted 3 weeks , because im so tight and stingy i decided enough is enough and stopped.
Whatever works for the individual i guess, i prefer a decent sized weekly dose tbh
Your 100% Right rockstar. Without ketamine however, my mind peforms in a 'Dysfunctional' way, and i think wrong things, do stuff the wrong way, worry about too much, blow shit out of proportion.
Ket is like my stabiliser wheels, i need them on to keep my mind balanced and operational
Its a CYP450 inhibitor, which is an important enzyme when it comes to do with ketamine and anti depressant effects, im just getting by atm with exercise.
I had a 3 week break without any ketamine when i started it and near the end of the second week / start of and all of the 3rd week every day id have around 5 hours where i was planning how im going to lay on the train rails and let it chop my head off, surely ill only live for 5 seconds?
What a good way to go THEN i looked at my dog and felt sad i cant leave him i love my dog so i decided to stay around for him.
Felt these mood swings EVERY FUCKING DAY so i gave in and done some ket.
Exercise and Ketamine are the only 2 things that seem to stabilise my mood, i see my GP and all he does is throw SSRI's like citalopram at me. MY SEROTONIN SYSTEM IS FUCKING FINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I should just tell him "Dude i have a better time than anyone ive ever known to on mdma, so therefor all that serotonin im releasing means i must have plenty of it"
My problem is dopamine related because when im due my dose, (say 250mg) i dont believe in doing it daily thats BOLLOCKS or even every few days, you dont need to thats just addictive behaviour and a waste of ketamine.
When i do my dose, nothing. few hours after i pick up.
Symptoms start to appear around the 10 day mark of my last dose of ketamine. (200mg - 300mg)
- Suicidal thoughts, very realistic plans
- Extremely low self esteem
- Feeling of Impending Doom
- Low motivation to do anything
- Low concentration ability
- Very Irritable
- Uncooperative
- Low energy
Or for the other half of the day then, i may be:
- Happy with thoughts that i will get somewhere in life
- Extreme bursts of energy and restlessness
- able to peform tasks faster
When ive had my weekly dose of ketamine ive found this my results:
- Increased Concentration
- Mood generally more stable
- Increased energy
- increased effort with almost everything
- Increased speed at doing things
- Increased accuracy with doing tasks
- Heightened Self esteem and a better opinion of myself
- More positve thoughts and much less and less severe negative thoughts
Other things that can give me a similar 'Pick me up' to the effects of ketamine doing its magic is:
- Weight Lifting/exercising
- Seeing friends (Sometimes, not all the time, sometimes it makes it worse)
I'm not even always after the 'K-Hole' when i do a high dose of ketamine like that, i am mainly after the beautiful afterglow, which i can describe feels like the last 20 minutes of MDMA in waves, but it feels like that all day and a much lesser extent the next day, and so on, but that sorts me out all week.
Without it , i am FUCKED.
I honestly think if i wasnt able to do it at all, id just continue with my plans of suicide that i had for many years and long before i ever used ketamine.
Ketamine is a Dopamine Reuptake Inhibitor, which i find most effective in keeping my spirits high.
I did try the daily dosing thing, all it did was turn me into a ketamine addict that lasted 3 weeks , because im so tight and stingy i decided enough is enough and stopped.
Whatever works for the individual i guess, i prefer a decent sized weekly dose tbh
Your 100% Right rockstar. Without ketamine however, my mind peforms in a 'Dysfunctional' way, and i think wrong things, do stuff the wrong way, worry about too much, blow shit out of proportion.
Ket is like my stabiliser wheels, i need them on to keep my mind balanced and operational
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rockstar 69
Ex-Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 26, 2011
- Messages
- 3,681
Know when to just keep quite? There's similar talk all over this forum, I've not said too much about anything there other than why they were made, which I think is pretty accurate. Go and read the interview, I'm sure you know which one, then come back and tell me I'm wrong. It was developed for both the reasons I stated, his own problem and to help many others problems of depression.
Sam I'm sure brimz will love that post :D, oh well brimz that's not only a nice scientific source you've had now that's 3 EADD'ers chimed giving their thoughts supporting what I already said... any further comments?
eh, the thread was created more in the spirit of:
not a, 'yeah, I feel kicking, just necked 20 tabs, gonna go and trip me nuts off' kinda deal, or 'I'm feeling pukka after 30 pints, mxe and a fried brekkie'
so if there's a lack of cohesion re opinion n whatnot, I'm guessing the spirit to be objective or engage in the above types of debate and questions Rockstar, just isnt here, regardless of the thread evolving there.
when things devlope like this I'm all for self censorship. just takes a nod and a wink and a gentle stir in the right direction from a mod, or a poster, and maybe taking it to a different thread or starting one, rather than a mod over reacting, or maybe charging in and deleting stuff inappropriately [often reeks of bias towards certain posters].
personally, I think the thread would benefit it's original intent more if debates like the above were 'devolved' orgaincally out of it ... but that's just my opinion.
not a, 'yeah, I feel kicking, just necked 20 tabs, gonna go and trip me nuts off' kinda deal, or 'I'm feeling pukka after 30 pints, mxe and a fried brekkie'
so if there's a lack of cohesion re opinion n whatnot, I'm guessing the spirit to be objective or engage in the above types of debate and questions Rockstar, just isnt here, regardless of the thread evolving there.
when things devlope like this I'm all for self censorship. just takes a nod and a wink and a gentle stir in the right direction from a mod, or a poster, and maybe taking it to a different thread or starting one, rather than a mod over reacting, or maybe charging in and deleting stuff inappropriately [often reeks of bias towards certain posters].
personally, I think the thread would benefit it's original intent more if debates like the above were 'devolved' orgaincally out of it ... but that's just my opinion.
rockstar 69
Ex-Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 26, 2011
- Messages
- 3,681
Where's anyone saying anything like that? Everytime I post your always not far behind with some negative comment, there is an ignore button if bug you that much, feel free to use it. I'm just giving my own experiance from when I went through a pretty intense bout of depression a few months ago, and what helped, coincidentally there's also a fair bit of scientific research done on the same subject.
I had no intentions of posting most of what I have in here but since brimz flamed me for my reply to ColtDan as 'constantly advocating drugs to fix problems' or whatever, without really much to back up what he said. So I thought I'd give him the benefits of my knowlege with a source or two and low and behold there's even a couple of EADD'ers saying the same thing. I wonder why...8)
Haha just come over to The Dark Side guys.. (I love saying that :D )
I think a thread on mental health on a drugs forum was always going to go this way.. which is partly why we have rules in TDS about no drugs-talk, as well as not wanting to trigger anyone etc.. so actually I've enjoyed a thread where we can discuss mental health and drugs
I hope your leg gets better soon Brimz, get yourself to a walk-in centre if you are worried and want it seen before Friday.. am not back in Briz yet, missed my bus haha but I will come and see your new place soon
On-topic, I'm feeling a bit better now I've got NYE out the way.. still pretty low but looking forward to getting back to Bristol and getting some kind of life again. There is a lot to be said for meeting up with friends, getting out and about, feeling like you are being productive and exercising.. I really think those are what fixes me, antidepressants do work for me but they just help me get out of bed and do things, and it's the doing things that makes me feel better
I think a thread on mental health on a drugs forum was always going to go this way.. which is partly why we have rules in TDS about no drugs-talk, as well as not wanting to trigger anyone etc.. so actually I've enjoyed a thread where we can discuss mental health and drugs
I hope your leg gets better soon Brimz, get yourself to a walk-in centre if you are worried and want it seen before Friday.. am not back in Briz yet, missed my bus haha but I will come and see your new place soon
On-topic, I'm feeling a bit better now I've got NYE out the way.. still pretty low but looking forward to getting back to Bristol and getting some kind of life again. There is a lot to be said for meeting up with friends, getting out and about, feeling like you are being productive and exercising.. I really think those are what fixes me, antidepressants do work for me but they just help me get out of bed and do things, and it's the doing things that makes me feel better
eh, youve misinterpreted my post intent entirely. completely. I have zero beef with you, or Colt or anyone who's posted in this thread.
there's a lack of cohesion re opinion n whatnot, I'm guessing the spirit to be objective or engage in the above types of debate and questions Rockstar, just isnt here, regardless of the thread evolving there.
[edit] and eh, whut? [not in relation to this thread but the ignore button thing]. you don't bug me, remotely. you're a decent poster. you're up and down and round about but I have no issue with you whatever, you make me laugh and roll my eyes. both are equally fine. youre as contradictory as me and as anyone else here with a loudmouth... PTCH included. but you can dish it, and you should be able to take it though. once again, this is not in relation to this thread but your other comment about being followed around. you're equally so with many posters. s'no biggy? unless youre feeling uber sensitive.
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rockstar 69
Ex-Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 26, 2011
- Messages
- 3,681
The first bit of your posts seems pretty obviously directed at the younger posters in this thread. Sorry if I have got that wrong which is quite likely as I've been up all night nursing some ridiculous man flu, so my thoughts aren't as concise as usual. For some reason I've been thinking you thought I was a loutish prick and that first bit was directed at me. Obviously not so I'll appologise for being daft.
I get what your saying about a lack of cohesion with opinion etc, everyone is wired differently though so this was always likely to be honest. With diagnosed mental health problems I guess (provided the diagnosis is correct) there should be more of a general consensus of things that helped. I've been diagnoses with depression before when my mum forced me to go to the docs all they did was prescribe Prozac. I'm not really a great believer in the idea that the doctor, would always more just try and find a way to get better that works for me as an individual.
Anyway seen as I don't have any diagnosed problems I'll leave this thread alone, I no longer meet the criteria! Glad to see your feeling a bit happier Effie and hope things go well for you back in Bristol
I get what your saying about a lack of cohesion with opinion etc, everyone is wired differently though so this was always likely to be honest. With diagnosed mental health problems I guess (provided the diagnosis is correct) there should be more of a general consensus of things that helped. I've been diagnoses with depression before when my mum forced me to go to the docs all they did was prescribe Prozac. I'm not really a great believer in the idea that the doctor, would always more just try and find a way to get better that works for me as an individual.
Anyway seen as I don't have any diagnosed problems I'll leave this thread alone, I no longer meet the criteria! Glad to see your feeling a bit happier Effie and hope things go well for you back in Bristol
Acid4Blood
Bluelighter
Went to my addiction/rehab doctor this morning for my tri-monthly check-up. (after no sleep & 4 trips last night!)
He reckons I have ADD/OCD. Doesn't suprise me really. I've been self-medicating for years (unknowingly!)
We also talked about the small percentage of people who have a pre-disposition that means their comedowns don't get worse as they get older. (This guy has studied addiction for years & knows his shit). He also reckons I am predisposed to this, as I'm sure alot of BL'ers/long time drug-users are.
Interesting morning at the docs!
He reckons I have ADD/OCD. Doesn't suprise me really. I've been self-medicating for years (unknowingly!)
We also talked about the small percentage of people who have a pre-disposition that means their comedowns don't get worse as they get older. (This guy has studied addiction for years & knows his shit). He also reckons I am predisposed to this, as I'm sure alot of BL'ers/long time drug-users are.
Interesting morning at the docs!
rockstar 69
Ex-Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 26, 2011
- Messages
- 3,681
Might have known you'd like jam and not marmalade, how is it the old joke goes? Something about you cannae marmalade a cock up your arse, so by default you were obviously a jammy dodger :D
I like how you said 'in a totally non creepy way' haha, and you'll take full responsibility for being a creep in Mugz thread aswell. Which I will take part credibility for being right, along with crackhead and whoever else said it would be where it is now
in a totally non creepy way. I'll take part responsibility & accountability - my flippant 'kicking in windows for kicks' comment possibly being a part of the misinterpretation.
I like how you said 'in a totally non creepy way' haha, and you'll take full responsibility for being a creep in Mugz thread aswell. Which I will take part credibility for being right, along with crackhead and whoever else said it would be where it is now
kaosisallwesee
Bluelighter
well in the past 6 months my parents split up, my dad had a reoccurence of lung cancer , a horrible break up with a long term partnet and no home as my parents sold it =/ but on the plus side of to uni in september and just met a fucking awesome girl,and my dads treatment is going well, so swings and roundabouts really