Have anybody else's experiences on MXE been a bit on the dark side lately? My more recent trips have been less magical and more downright evil. The first time this happened, I honest-to-god thought that I had broken reality, and had reduced the universe and everything in it to this warped, distorted, constantly shifting reality. I thought there was no going back, and felt so guilty for permanently messing up the universe.
Other recent trips have followed a similar vein, namely that I feel as though I am trapped in the MXE hole forever, doomed to a life in a vegetative state on a hospital bed, drip fed nutrients and having my chamberpot emptied at regular intervals. Just feels as though I have reduced my brain to mush one time too many.
I tried lowering the dosage, but this simply left me on a threshold experience that was just as unpleasant. I never felt 'gone', but was thrown about recklessly by the drug and left me feeling rather sick.
I'm worried that these recent bad trips may be symptoms of damage I am causing internally. If MXE is doing unspeakable things to my body, it would follow that my body would react negatively and trigger a bad trip. I would say the last 4 MXE holes I've been in have been like this, the first one being just over a week ago.