Social Tell a Joke

[yubacity]

Why do melons have weddings

They cantelope

 

[yubacity]

I can remember the loyalist prisoners hunger strike

It lasted from breakfast to lunch

 

[kiely]

Right after he was shot, Lincoln had half a mind to watch the rest of the play.

winner winner

 

[kiely]

Thepenisinmymouth

Did you read the pen is in my mouth ?

The fuck you did ..

 

[kiely]

Doctor : I am afraid you have a very rare disease


Patient : Oh no, what's it called ?


Doctor : Well what do you want it to be called ?

 

[kiely]

HELL WAS FULL SO I'M BACK.
( the joke... we're in hell already )

 

[kiely]

I'm not an asshole, I'm a hemorrhoid.

I irritate assholes.

 

[kiely]

The longer I live, the
more convinced I am
that this planet is
used by other planets
as a lunatic asylum.

 

[kiely]

When you gotta be extra safe on social media
because some people take jokes harder than dicks.

 

[kiely]

I can't tell my political one.
It is just so bad.

 

[kiely]

If you could be anyone for a day who would you be ?
I'd be you and I'd shut the fck up.

 

[kiely]

I never run with scissors. Those last two words were unnecessary.

 

[FixXxer]

My girlfriend starting watching the tudors

Not many for a castle...

Spoiler: Wha???

Doors

 

[kiely]

Ya'll gotta stop vaping
man I can't see shit out here !

 

[nuttynutskin]

What do you call a female Native American that fixes people's teeth?

Spoiler: A

A Pocahontas orthodontist

 

[chippermonk]

Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd break into a distillery. Daffy turns to Elmer and says: "Is this whiskey?"
Elmer says: "Yeth but not as whiskey as wobbing a bank!"

 

[kiely]

Mike Tyson to All of Us :

BE THANKFUL I DON'T KICK
THUMONES ASS.

 

[LucidSDreamr]

What does a magazine contain 30 rounds? Because 30 is the average number of kids in an American classroom.


Did you hear they are teaching the metric system to kids in America now? 9mm at a time.

 

[ions]

 

[kiely]