Social Tell a Joke

[jasperkent]

What do you call a dog with no legs?

It doesn't matter. He's not gonna come when you call him anyway.

 

[kiely]

There's a pirate. Everybody. Aargh. Argh.
He goes to the doctor.
The doctor says You have a steering wheel stuck
in your pant's.
The Pirate goes - Aarrrg. It's driving menuts.

 

[kiely]

'Picards' first apartment only had a four foot ceiling.
He couldn't stand living there.

 

[shreddedlettuce]

Man goes to doctor.

Doctor - "What can I do for you today"
Man - "I got a bar of soap stuck up my bum"

Doctor - "That's Lifebuoy"

 

[Robi]

What's the difference between a corvette and a dead body? I don't have a corvette in my garage.

 

[kiely]

.... which is the whole reason I started this thread... to be able to share this feeling amongst the community.. whether online or in real life ..
Thank you for your many contributions to this thread and thank you for the smile


To add a joke to this comment that may or may not be a part of this thread already...

Any time my son would stub or hurt his toe growing up.. I would ask him, "should call a tow truck?"

Thank you. That is just awesome. And I know you are genuinely a treasure and so appreciated so much too.

 

[kiely]

But wait wait wait ... one more

 

[ions]

If you lose your Khakis in Texas, it means you can't find your pants. If you lose your Khakis in Boston, it means you can't start your car

 

[kiely]

How did Pinocchio find out he was made out of wood.

His right hand caught on fire.

 

[kiely]

What's uh white and 14 inches long.

Nothing.

 

[kiely]

What did the toaster say to the slice of bread.

I want you inside me.

 

[kiely]

Who ever stole my copy of Microsoft office , I will track you down. You have my word....

 

[kiely]

 

[kiely]

 

[kiely]

If I melt dry ice can I swim without getting wet !

 

[kiely]

I got some powdered water but I don't know what to add.

 

[ions]

 

[kiely]

hahaa

 

[Robi]

What's the difference between love,lust and showing off? Spit,swallow,gargle.

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

Why did the little girl fall off the swing?

She didn't have any arms.