• HEALTH & RECOVERY
    Welcome Guest
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules Thread Directory 1 Thread Directory 2
    Mindfulness Links Addiction & Mind
    Sober Living Partner Program (SLiPP)
  • H&R Moderators: VerbalTruist

NEW/FINAL at home (attempt) detox diary, general support, and advice thread.

My friend that gave me the roxys just wrecked his car on his way home from my apartment and got charged with possession of sched 1 (heroin) and DUI.
I feel like its my fault... I can not believe this.. His mom is on oxygen and he only had his rental car for 4 hours before he wrecked it..
 
Damn, man. When it rains, eh? I'm guessing that other blue is down the hatch already? Hang in there. Life is brutal
 
Hey man, just read through your new posts. Don't let what happened to your buddy get you down. Its not your fault in the slightest bit. He made the decision to drive with drugs in the car while messed up. Don't let any negativity in your headspace bro. Just keep looking forward.
 
Its not your fault dude wrecked. Would it be the Mcdonalds fault if he wrecked after getting a cheeseburger? No. But I understand why you feel that way.
 
w0w0mg said:
My friend that gave me the roxys just wrecked his car on his way home from my apartment and got charged with possession of sched 1 (heroin) and DUI.
I feel like its my fault... I can not believe this.. His mom is on oxygen and he only had his rental car for 4 hours before he wrecked it..
Click to expand...

Driving on heroin is dangerous, and it's not your fault. I'm sure you didn't recommend or advise he drive intoxicated.

I also want to state for the record that I never crashed a car on heroin, it's just simply a sign that someone's addiction is way out of control that they can't control their use to that degree (not only unable to abstain, but unable to take massive doses and then operate heavy machinery).

Don't feel bad man. Part of recovery is witnessing those fall around you. It can be harrowing, but it makes you thankful for what you have.
 
Yeah, I had the feeling that he might not be safe to drive but I really didn't question it due to the fact he's driven on Heroin plenty of times.
I just wish I could have done something and not try to get him to leave as soon as he came by.

FocusedFucker: I tried to reply to your PM but your inbox is full! Delete some messages so I can send you a reply back.

Much love everyone.
 
I am sorry to hear that your friend wrecked his car, w0w, but it sure is definitely NOT your fault. He is an adult who makes his own choices and unfortunately, he has a very bad consequence b/c he chose to drive high. And, every addict I know drives when they are high. I used to drive after I went out drinking, and to this day, I am so grateful that I never got a DUI or worse, hit another car and hurt another person. It was pure luck. I don't drink anymore, but I do drive while on my prescribed doses of opiates. Captain H is right, and I look at it as a sign that someone's addiction has progressed so badly that they are unable to use their own judgement that they should wait awhile before getting behind the wheel.

You are a very caring person so I know this bothers you alot. Just take care of yourself until you get through the worst of the withdrawals, and then you can be there to offer support and to listen to your friend. Thank God he didn't get seriously hurt, or worse in the crash.

It sucks that you went to the ER and the wait was so long. When I cold turkeyed in 2013, I got right in, and the clonidine was magical... I was able to make it through the rest of the withdrawals with only insomnia and intermittent chills. I keep thinking you should be through the worst, and then I remember about your benzo addiction. I am keeping my fingers crossed that you get the meds at the ER, and a bed at a detox.
 
p0kemama, what did they all give you and what did you tell them?
I was pretty blunt about it - I told them that I was detoxing off benzos and opiates and just want something to help comfort me and keep me from having a seizure.
I just couldn't sit there for 5 hours. I will be going VERY early in the morning, then I am going to my friends court hearing at 9 am (just hope I'm not too sick)
I do have half a 15 mg roxy left I was going to take in the morning - like I said, I am scared that this is going to set me back... I really hope it doesn't but at least I should be able to get some sleep tonight.
Those damn Restless legs KILL me the most at night.
much love
 
So, I ended up doing a whole roxy 30mg today.
Tomorrow I will be going back to cold turkey.
I have 12 mg of xanax to help and I will be buying some vitamins.
Much love everyone. This will be offically no other taper or anything,
I feel like I did set myself back some, but hopefully not too bad.
I will keep you all up to date.
If I do not post much it's only because I will be in bed most likely,
I am going to try to just benzo my self out for the first 2 days if it's possible.
I do have 5 blood pressure pills I think may help too.
I just hate that I know I will be having intense RLS all over again, and insomina.
I just want to sleep the withdrawals away.
 
I also have some phenibut - which I am sorta too scared to take because its so highly addictive, I may just take a small amount one time if my WD are too intense.
I am not looking forward being drenched in sweat. I felt semi-normal the last 2 days because of the roxys.
My friend got charged with PWISD heroin and Sched 2, maintaining and dwelling, and DUI. His court date is not until January of 2017!!!!
I feel so bad, but at least that was not me. I don't know if I am going to end up going to jail because I do have some violations. I am waiting to hear back from my PO.
I just need to get clean ASAP so I can pass a drug test - hence why I need to start cold turkey again. I will worry about coming off the xanax once I get over opiate WD.
I have until March 3rd to be completely clean, that's my next PO visit. There's no promise though that I won't go to jail. She may lock me up then and there.
At least hopefully I will not be kicking in jail. I could have gone to a detox place this morning but they told me that they don't provide ANY comfort meds besides motrin,
and you MUST attend all meetings and groups regardless how sick you are. I just don't think I could do that. I am just going to try to continue my at home detox attempt.
I feel like that will be more painful.
I have not given up. Your support means so much to me.

Much love again
 
Anyone that is curious my friends charges are:
3565 Felony PWIMSD HEROIN 90-95(A)(1)
3516 Felony PWIMSD SCH II CS 90-95(A)(1)
9968 Felony MAINTN VEH/DWELL/PLACE CS (F) 90-108(A)(7)
3487 Felony M/S/D/P CS W/N 1000FT SCHOOL 90-95(E)(8)
3401 Misdemeanor POSSESS DRUG PARAPHERNALIA 90-113.22(A)
5405 Traffic DRIVING WHILE IMPAIRED 20-138.1
9955 Traffic CIVIL REVOCATION DR LIC (30) 20-16.5

He also totaled the brand new rental car.

Like said, his court date is 1/01/2017 I have never seen a court date that far out before.
He is already on probation, so I know he will be going to prison for a while.
 
Hey Wow been following your thread, boy, those are some charges, at least he is ok, as you will be too. Hang on in there, I'm pulling for you again, fondly, bono
 
Stay strong, darling. Stay strong. We are here to hold your hand.

You are not alone, and you can and WILL get through this.

Glad to hear from you. We were all worried about ya.

Be kind to yourself, it matters.

Peace.
 
So I went to the store today, here is a picture of my arsenal:
D1Og08s.png
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top