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NEW/FINAL at home (attempt) detox diary, general support, and advice thread.

That sucks, man. I've had my battles with Xanax in the past. I was going through Xanax withdrawal when I got married. Not fun but I would take benzo WD over opiate any day. I know for some people it's worse but not me. Opiates are truly the fucking devil. I hope everything turns for you, wow. You seem like a good dude. We all mess up and we are definitely paying for it. Stay strong. No more day 1's!
 
w0w0mg said:
I am with you Stickman, I am on day 2 not feeling so great but I know it will get better, I have been taking a lot of xanax to combat WD I know it's stupid but fuck it, one substance at a time I guess. If I can get past the opiate Withdrawals, benzo WD will be next on my list. I need to be completely clean by March 3rd which IDK if I will have the benzos out of my system then, so I may be going to jail. At least I wont be kicking too bad in a cell.
Click to expand...

How long have you been dependent on benzos for?
 
Hang in there, pal, I'm still right there with ya! It is SUCKING lol.

Man.

You can do it, you are close to the finish line.

Peace.
 
Hang on, sweetheart, hang on tight.

It will pass. You are so close to the finish line, baby.

Taste the victory that is already on its way.

You are doing great. Yes you are. This is war. A war in the mind especially for you, I know. You can do this. Hang on. Just reset your mind, forget the past struggle, get through one hour. Then one more. Then two more. closer and closer you get to the finish line....

I am thinking of you, and sending you peace, strength, hope, and lots and lots of love, my friend.

We are in this toghether.

Holding your hand.

Peace.
 
Okay so, I really need to get off benzos due to the fact I have a drug test here soon and the only way I'm going to pass if I stop taking any more benzos.
I went ahead and got an ounce of Kratom to help combat benzo withdrawals and opiate withdrawals.
I know I said I was going to cold turkey - but I really can't keep taking benzos and pass and I really don't think I would be able to handle benzo AND opiate WD.
So I'm going to do a Kratom taper to get off the benzos too so I pass my drug test for probation and Kratom won't show up on the drug test.
I will be starting my Kratom taper tomorrow.
I don't plan on to be on it long - just until I have my PO appointment and KNOW I will pass the drug test.
I won't be using ANYTHING else besides kratom and multivitamins.
Hopefully, it will help my benzo withdrawals, I heard it does. I have been taking roughly around 5 mg a day and I will be cold turkey tomorrow.
My last dose will be tonight only 1 mg.
Thank you everyone. I will keep you all up to date.
Much love.
 
Please do keep us updated. I'm hanging in there with ya, halfway anyway, my journey involves chronic pain as an added battle. Wish I could say I was hanging in 100%, but it's hard with my circumstances.

I'm glad you got some kratom, good. I'm glad you have something to make it a bit gentler.

You are doing great. Each hour is that much closer to the finish line. Hours make days, make weeks, make months, and years :) You got this. So close!!!

Just hang on a bit longer.

I'm proud of you, man.

Truly.

Peace.
 
Thank you so much Abetteway, you have been so amazing with giving me support.
You're true friend - Those are so hard to find.
Everyone on this thread have been awesome, and it's been great.
I love all of you. Thank you so much.
Much love to you all.
 
No shame in using Kratom. I know its near impossible to see any sunshine right now but think if you kick H and benzo's at the same time, pass your drug test and avoid prison... Nothing you can't do after that! How are things with your girl? Is she being supportive?
 
She doesn't know I will be using Kratom, she won't allow it - She want's me to be completely clean.
She just doesn't understand.. you know?
 
Yeah, I hate that man. A lot of people that have never been through it kinda have that 'you chose to take drugs so you can choose to quit' and don't understand the pure hell that it entails.
 
HI w0w: I am glad you have BL to have a place to be completely honest. Personally, I see absolutely no problem with Kratom; in fact, I have a bunch I ordered awhile ago, and have not tried yet. I am afraid I will get sick on it, so I am saving it for when I am desperate and totally in w/d and out of opiates. I appreciate you taking the time to journal about your journey through your withdrawals... I am keeping my fingers crossed that the benzo w/d will be easy for you... you deserve a break!

You will find no judgement from me, as I am certainly far from perfect in so many ways. I wish "normies" could understand how much addicts suffer, you know? It sucks you have to "sneak" the Kratom from your girl, but hey, comfort meds serve a great purpose, and have helped many people kick their DOC.

Have a good night, my dear friend.
 
I'm still hanging in with you buddy :) Almost 2am and I'm up and on fire lol

Sucks

But we got this!

Peace
 
Check out "heroin binaural beats", on YouTube. Seems to help me. Maybe having something else to focus on? I dunno. I like it.
 
I highly recommend you go to a doctor and explain your situation regarding benzos. Most will write you a prescription to taper you off. You wont get in trouble with probation since you will have a script. The course of action you are taking is very risky and frankly I will be surprised if it works out. I know I sound like a broken record but an inpatient detox is really what you need. I wish you the best but I don't agree with the actions your taking.
 
That's a great idea about the script for benzos.... If they give u Xanax then it'll be OK if you piss it out since it's legally scripted.

I sure hope you are hanging in there my friend, I know it's hard. You've got so many hours of hard work behind you, keep going honey, I'm holding your hand and it's gonna be OK.

Peace.
 
I took your advice crimsonjunk and They prescribed me 10 clonidine tablets to help opiate withdrawals and 30 liberum capsules to help the benzo withdrawals.
I once again slipped back and did heroin, it was only a one day use (but I did do a whole gram, stupid I know) - That's why I finally went to the ER and explained the situation.
So hopefully, The kratom, clonidine, and liberum will help with my WD. I am all out of immodium which is going to suck.. but hopefully those meds will make it more comfortable.
Thank you again everyone.
 
The only bad thing on the bottle it says "FOR BENZO WITHDRAWALS" so I might try to sharpie that little part, so my PO doesn't see that, because that would red flag her of me using.
 
So my last dose of heroin was at 2PM today, and I will begin taking the medicines when the withdrawals start peeking.
I will take some xanax for a little bit and then make the switch to the liberum. I know my stupidity of using heroin set me back again,
it's just so hard when you're so sick and then you end up with money.. Luckily, I won't have any funds for a little bit so I am left with what I have.
I am still not going to give up hope, I know the withdrawals are not going to be pleasant, but hopefully the kratom and everything else will help.
Much love.
 
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