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June Getting and/or Staying Sober Thread

Captain.Heroin

Captain.Heroin

Bluelight Crew
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Nov 3, 2008
Messages
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Thousands of Miles Away From You
This thread is for anyone who is trying to get sober for the first time, or has been sober for as much time as 1 day to 30 years. Everyone is welcome to post in this thread. Please adhere to the Bluelight User Agreement and Sober Living Forum Guidelines.

The May thread can be found by clicking > here <

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hey hey hey captain how goes it my friend these certainly are great threads.
I got down so low with my sub usage and was only using about a 100 micrograms every 6 hours and thought I could jump off this soon im doing pretty good but then I had a setback cause im going through a bunch of bullshit in court(not exusing my drug use I know its all on me just saying ive been under a lot of stress latley) and im now back to 1-2mg a day back to feeling high everyday on bupe. I suppose im lucky im not doing heroin now and not driving home every other night with a kilo of china white under my seat hoping I don't get busted. and im lucky to not be using needles anymore I know others have not been so lucky so I thank god everyday I can be normal and happy with who I am.

I just helped my uncle get into detox last weekend so hopes hes doing good in there he was homeless for while now andi hadn't heard from him for a few months and a week and a half ago I heard from my mom he was over visiting and had a sezuire and was shaking uncontrollably due to alcohol withdrawal so I went and found him in the park with his girlfriend and woke him up waving a 26 of Smirnoff in his face he was so happy to see a friend and of course a bottle so he got himself well and I took him to mcdonalds and fed him bought him a tent and gave him a hundred bucks he was so stoked it made me happy to help him out when I could as I have been there too we all know what its like. he said he was tapering his booze I said bullshit that's impossible one extra swig and your fucked so I phoned some people and got him bumped up to the top of the list at detox it only took a few days he was thankful for the help I said that's what family's for ive been where you are and im doing good today and have money to spare so I will help you out. hes always been a nice guy hes just lost and in pain like so many others, after seing him it brought back memories of the drug life for me and made me so thankful I have made it where I am today and made me that much more determined to getting a job helping addicts in need when society has turned their back on them.
 
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^ that's great how you're helping out your family man!

And I am really proud of you cutting back on the suboxone so well!

I have 173 days (starting on the 1st) off Suboxone and I couldn't be happier with myself for trying for this great change and making it.
 
that's great man realy admirable and inspiring to hear you did that cause it aint easy brother we all know that.
we gotta live day by day and change around many aspects of our lives to stay clean. im starting a new easier less physical job thats more of the retail side of things at the same company ive worked at 8 years so that's good as I wont be in so much physical pain everyday and im already happier:). I still want to be a drug/alcohol counsler though and make a difference.

the thing is I cant be a hypocrite and be taking suboxone:(
 
trainspotter10102 said:
the thing is I cant be a hypocrite and be taking suboxone:(
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I actually know a few CADC counselors who are on Suboxone. They need the medication and take it as perscribed. In their opinion they are "clean" and I share that opinion personally.

I am a Social Worker, if you want to talk about careers and stuff PM me. I am considering getting my CADC certification. I pass my State practice tests and I haven't taken specific CADC classes. I do have to urge caution as sometimes addicts like ourselves place helping others over our own recovery and for me that cannot happen.
 
I want to be able to enjoy this spring weather so badly . 36 hours into withdrawal and this time I waited until I drained the bank acc again . I can't keep doing this . I just walked in from having a nice cry session on a swing in the backyard . I feel so seperate from how upbeat and beautiful the whether is . This is such a nightmare. The worst part is i keep putting myself through it.
 
trainspotter10102 said:
that's great man realy admirable and inspiring to hear you did that cause it aint easy brother we all know that.
we gotta live day by day and change around many aspects of our lives to stay clean. im starting a new easier less physical job thats more of the retail side of things at the same company ive worked at 8 years so that's good as I wont be in so much physical pain everyday and im already happier:). I still want to be a drug/alcohol counsler though and make a difference.

the thing is I cant be a hypocrite and be taking suboxone:(
Click to expand...

I don't think you would be a hypocrite.

It's all about making positive changes - taking medicine approved by a doctor is acceptable. You would make a great counselor.
 
phactor said:
I actually know a few CADC counselors who are on Suboxone. They need the medication and take it as perscribed. In their opinion they are "clean" and I share that opinion personally.

I am a Social Worker, if you want to talk about careers and stuff PM me. I am considering getting my CADC certification. I pass my State practice tests and I haven't taken specific CADC classes. I do have to urge caution as sometimes addicts like ourselves place helping others over our own recovery and for me that cannot happen.
Click to expand...

Thanks man I live in Canada but I think I'll still take you up on that as I'm sure its relevant here
 
trainspotter10102 said:
Thanks man I live in Canada but I think I'll still take you up on that as I'm sure its relevant here
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Yeah I noticed that. I have actually done cases with Canadian social workers and our systems are very similar.

Also, gotta let you know I grew up playing hockey. I love visiting Canada, wouldn't mind moving there eventually. I also liked the Blackhawks when they were bad (no bandwagon here).

Eddie Belfour was my favorite growing up lol.
 
What's up all?

May was one of the best months I've had in a long while.. hoping June keeps that going. I'm sober, everything is great, working, relationship is awesome, etc.. but I get sentenced in a couple weeks so it could all go to shit.

Crossing my fingers.

Hope everyones doing well.
 
Not much sleep last few days. today off all. Just ciggies. Got the jolts and the blues. Let's see how I go. Maybe 1 of those 12 step meetings in the near future. Fanging for a a couple of xanax.
 
Alcohol ice and codeine tablets been on a bender. Don't have any sleepers to come down on so I'm doing it the hard way.
 
Ugh don't know how I let myself.., but I used yesterday after almost 5 months being clean. Some dilaudid literally fell into my lap. And it totally wasn't worth it!!! The high wasn't even enjoyable because I was so angry at myself the whole time. There was a huge thrill in having it and the anticipation of using... But it was hugely disappointing, and I remember feeling this way last time I fell off the wagon. I hope I can remember this feeling to resist temptation next time.
 
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