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Introduce Yourself! v.2.0

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ugly, welcome back :)

tricomb <3 love to you dood. Post in here more often plz.

manicmama TDS definitely works really well as a support tool for getting off of drugs/staying clean. It's worked better than any meetings or therapy I could find.
I've also found that giving advice and support even if you aren't that much better, sometimes seems to sink into you over time as well. I'm glad you found us and you decided to introduce yourself. <3
 
Hey everyone... I haven't been on here since I gave up opiates in 2009... but found myself back and hooked :( I am happy to see here though that people finally embraced what I had said WAY back then before anyone knew about the use of Lyrica to cure a night of withdrawal. I say one night... because after the first night, Lyrica will not do the same as it did the night before for helping get you some sleep. Also, I was always advocating to people the use of Lyrica to potentiate and extend your highs you hate to feel trail off when you take short-acting narcotics. I was one of the first people ever to post on here about how it relieves the restlesness and pain associated with withdrawal. And I wish that I would have gotten the recognition, but oh well. At least my word got out through others as people have discovered it's wonders of withdrawal ease. The thing is that now.... I am still taking Lyrica since it has always done the best with my neuralgia, the reason I was put on sooooo many pills in the first place. I'm going to start helping on here with remedies for lyrica withdrawal. (Which I will tell you right now is HANDS DOWN much worse than opiate withdrawal as hard as that is to believe.)

BUT... what I bring to the table here with coming back on to is the offer of ACCURATE information as well as medical information to those who have questions of ANY sort in the use or obvious desire of misuse of opioids. I would encourage anyone to PM me about Lyrica, medical information, (Though will take no responsibility or liability for what follows lol) or other answers to everything and anything you wish to get the truths that amateurs think they know and can do more harm than good in having you believe them. Look to my new threads I will be starting here shortly.
 
Welcome back Kindbudz :)
We need as much first hand experienced based knowledge here as possible, your offerings will be appreciated I'm sure.
 
I'll post in here as much as I can!

Ummm, to start with I had a rough childhood and teenage years, and am battling substance abuse problems. It's hard because my DOC was opiates, and then a few years ago I was made a chronic pain patient and will be on opioid medication for the rest of my life. The drugs I used to numb my emotional pain now became a requirement for physical pain, so I've cut back my usage a lot!!

Just got off of 10 years addiction to xanax, in doses regularly exceeding hundreds of milligrams, and ever since I came off benzos, my probably already developing schizophrenia took it to a new level. It's still not severe, but it's more than enough to notice.
 
Hey all, long time lurker first time poster.

My names Dan and Im 28 years young, My DOC is alcohol and MDMA aswell as weed earlier on in life. Iv'e given up the weed as It eventually made me very paranoid, I rarely take MDMA but have done alot recently due to breaking up with my GF of 7 years.

I still struggle with alcohol and have done since I was 14 years old and used that (aswell as the weed) to escape from a fairly disruptive home life due to my father being emotionally abusive towards me and my mother and sister. I have had some problems with depression and anxiety which are under control at the moment through natural therapies and an active lifestyle.

The main reasons for me being here are to try and help others and also to help myself by continuing to learn from other people and their experiences, this place has helped me alot in the past <3 and I'm thankful now that I am reasonably well that I can give some back:)
 
Welcome to TDS Tricomb and Ronnie :)
I think most of us will relate to your stories here, I'm sure you'll both fit right in nicely.
 
How'do all. I'm Amy and I love this site. The other day my husband asked me how I knew so much technical stuff about drugs and I'm like - cant tell ya, my secret! Anyway, thanks to all for sharing.

What brought me to the dark side? I don't know, I'm usually pretty happy with life in general. I have a huge appreciation for dark humor and that's what life really seems to be. A dark comedy. I see the beauty in that. But sometimes it does make me look to the sky and ask why. I guess my bigger source of grief is my pessimistic husband. I love him and am happy with him majority of the time. We're soul mates corny as it sounds. But he has a negative streak that just kills my soul sometimes. I wish I could fix him and that depresses me. Another major issue for me is ADD. Sounds like a small issue but causes me to constantly dissapoint my hubby and daughter. "mama why haven't you made me an eye appointment yet" from your sweet 8 year old = dagger to my heart. All in all I'm a positive person but my dark streak is very strong. I think I kinda like it sometimes; to feel depressed. I didn't have a bad upbringing to blame anything on. Had a great childhood. But was an only child and hate to admit it but I think that has something to do with the things I hate about myself. I wish I was just a ghost so I could just observe life and not have to be a part of it. Just do my own thing and not have to worry about disappointing anyone or myself.

I hope I can hElp some folks in the DS. I think by being an overall positive Person it will rub off on people and since I do love dark, I can definitely relate and understand. Love hugs and kisses!!

@N3o I've seen you in the lounge. I'm makin my way there baby! I want in, y'all my kinda freaks :) 10 or so more posts to go!
 
Ronnie84 said:
Hey all, long time lurker first time poster.

My names Dan and Im 28 years young, My DOC is alcohol and MDMA aswell as weed earlier on in life. Iv'e given up the weed as It eventually made me very paranoid, I rarely take MDMA but have done alot recently due to breaking up with my GF of 7 years.

I still struggle with alcohol and have done since I was 14 years old and used that (aswell as the weed) to escape from a fairly disruptive home life due to my father being emotionally abusive towards me and my mother and sister. I have had some problems with depression and anxiety which are under control at the moment through natural therapies and an active lifestyle.

The main reasons for me being here are to try and help others and also to help myself by continuing to learn from other people and their experiences, this place has helped me alot in the past <3 and I'm thankful now that I am reasonably well that I can give some back:)
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Hey Dan, you sound a lot like me (except I'm a chick ;)). Welcome to The Dark Side <3 How is your drinking going at the moment? Please feel free to check out our Alcoholism thread if you need support, or want to offer others support too :)
 
I am introducing myself again since I ducked out for a minute. I'm doing better than I was and I am going back to school to be pharmacy technician. Teaching jobs are just not there. I haven't even had a nibble... very disappointing after sending out hundreds of CVs. So my decision is to change careers altogether. I hope I'm making the right choice.
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ugly said:
I am introducing myself again since I ducked out for a minute. I'm doing better than I was and I am going back to school to be pharmacy technician. Teaching jobs are just not there. I haven't even had a nibble... very disappointing after sending out hundreds of CVs. So my decision is to change careers altogether. I hope I'm making the right choice.
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Hey Ugly (I don't like calling you that :) LOL) congrats on your new career path! Working in a pharmacy sounds pretty nice. I don't think I would mind doing that one bit. I know that making a major change like that can create a lot of stress but try to remember there are no wrong choices in life (except suicide maybe). But in this case sounds like you have chosen to stop beating your head against a wall and became proactive with your situation. Good job! Even if you complete the course and then a teaching job pops up, it won't be a waste of time. You'll just have one more bullet in your revolver to fire off at life if it tries to give you shit!
 
bmxgroupie said:
Hey Ugly (I don't like calling you that :) LOL) congrats on your new career path! Working in a pharmacy sounds pretty nice. I don't think I would mind doing that one bit. I know that making a major change like that can create a lot of stress but try to remember there are no wrong choices in life (except suicide maybe). But in this case sounds like you have chosen to stop beating your head against a wall and became proactive with your situation. Good job! Even if you complete the course and then a teaching job pops up, it won't be a waste of time. You'll just have one more bullet in your revolver to fire off at life if it tries to give you shit!
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Funny you should mention that. I just got off the phone. Offered a job teaching mentally challenged kids for a little over minimum wage. I signed up as a sub though, because they get more an hour and I can still take pharm tech. because I can pic which days I work.

I just finished posting a blog about some of this too. Serendipitous.

We have gift cards for in and out, so we are having burgers and fries for lunch. Then we have to take my car down to police station and have it signed off. We got a ticket for having the front windows tinted. They were barely tinted, too. I had the lightest one. My husband took the tint off and we are going to take care of our ticket. I'm going to be high. I'm smoking now in fact.

Oh is this a social thread? No drugs in the social threads... I think? Take out the last two sentences then.
 
Im new to bluelight ive been a lurker for years and have finally created an acount. I love reading all the informative posts on this website and think its great. anyways ive been using opiates as my drug of choice for about 6 years and have dabbled in pretty much everyother drug out there but opiates have always been my love. ive recently been doing the weekend warrior thing with suboxone.... taking subs for like ten days then stoping sub for 3-4 days then doing dope for one day then back to sub. im hoping to break this cycle and hope to pick up good info on BL. t
 
Hey everyone. I am a 20 year old female with a very, very big problem. I have an extremely addictive personality to begin with, I'm a trash in junkie. Anything that gives me a buzz will go in my body. Since age 13 My SOC was alcohol. With very, detrimental affects to my liver, social life etc. I dabbled in cocaine/crack, MDma, amphetamines barbiturates, benzos, opiates. Everything and anything. After my daughter was born, (17months ago)! I snapped. Binge drinking to the extreme. I became mean, manipulative, decietful. You know how it is. 2 months ago I was introduced to mdpv. I fell instantly. I have no desire to drink. But all I think about is mdpv. Its ruining me, but I just am not able to stop alone. I am waiting to get in a residential rehab facility ATM..
 
Hey cupcake,
Your story sent a shiver down my spine - sounds very similar to my life story.
At least u WANT to get clean, that's a massive step forward, my clean episodes in the past have only happened cos I wanted it, forcing me never works.
I really hope u achieve ur goal, I've only been on here a few days myself but it's nice to see others with similar issues - makes me feel less of waste of space - I hope u find support and help here cupcake.
Good luck, MM x
 
Morning,

My name is Bri, and i just joined. a freind in class was on here and was telling me about it and i checked it out and decided to make an account.
Well, i have had a decent life, good mom, decent dad, pretty close with all my family. my parents got divorced as a lot of peoples do, it wasnt so much them divorcing as it was the way the divorce went down. i barley see my mom anymore. and when i do, she has no time for me. her fiance is so controling and never lets her out of his sights. she drinks quite a bit now. i used to think it was more for fun, but now she always has a glass of wine, a beer, a cup of whiskey. she is starting to change.
With my dad he is completly different. he doesnt drink. when he does its on a holiday and he never has more than 2 beers. my dads pretty cool i guess. he wants me to be succesful, but he keeps holding onto me. im not sure if its becasue he doesnt want me to grow up, or if he doesnt trust me, but he has his reasons.
i have a younger sister. i dont get along that well with her but we can be civil. i think i get mad at her becasue she isnt as open as me, and i can tell she wants to express herself but she just hold it in.
NOW for me. im 17 i have lived in NJ for a little over 6 years. my dad was in the military for 23 years before retiring. i was born in Californina, moved to Germany, then Colorado,Virginia, and now Jersey. i dont like it here. i mean ive met some pretty awsome people. ive learned a lot about myself, but ive also gotten in a lot of trouble. During my freshman year(junior now-graduating a year early) i was going through my rebelious phase. i started sneaking out, expeirimenting with pot, a little with pills, i started sneaking out and stealing out of peoples cars. i was arrested for that in November of 2009, went to court in febuary, and i was put on probation and mandentory anger managment sessions. i still havnt completed the anger managment and i wish i had.to this day i regret doing what i did. in some ways i wish i would have been punished for it so maybe it would make me appreciate the freedom i have.
after all the legal problems i went through i dark period of time where i was self harming. my parents found out and took me to get help where they decided to put me into a hospital. i was in impatient for a very short time(only a week) then i did outpatient for 3 weeks. after i got out i was scarred to go back to the real world. i loved the place. everyone was nice, they didnt judge me, they just accepted me. - anway, i continued with therapy after that for over a year. then my dad changed our insurance and i couldnt continue seeing my therapist. it was quite horrible, i was used to seeing her every week and then that was it. i tried seeing other people but no one was the same.

i guess all in all im a 17 year old girl named Bri, who is her own worst enemy.
 
Hello everyone,

I am a 20 year old male who has been rated a genius by the University of Alberta & has an IQ of 135. However, I also have a Polysubstance Abuse problem. I have been diagnosed with Drug Induced Psychosis (tested positive for Amphetamines [Meth] & Cannabinoids) along with Polysubstance Abuse. That was in January. My drugs of choice are weed, nicotine, & benzodiazepines. However, I'm willing to do from 25I-NBOMe to Zopiclone. My "resume" is as follows...

1) 25I-NBOMe
2) 2C-B
3) 2C-C
4) 2C-D
5) 2C-E
6) 2C-I
7) 2C-T-7
8) 5-MeO-DALT
9) Alcohol
10) Amphetamines
11) Bupropion
12) Caffeine
13) Cannabinoids (weed, JWH)
14) Clonazepam
15) Cocaine
16) Codeine
17) Crack
18) Diphenhydramine
19) Dimenhydrinate
20) DXM
21) Ecstasy
22) Ephedrine
23) GHB
24) Ketamine
25) Kratom
26) Lorazepam
27) LSD
28) MDA
29) MDMA
30) Methamphetamines
31) Methoxetamine
32) Methylphenidate (Ritalin)
33) Morphine
34) Nicotine
35) Nitrous Oxide
36) Nutmeg
37) Opium
38) Oxycodone
39) Psilocybin
40) Salvinorin A
41) Zopiclone

The only drugs I consider myself having a true addiction problem with are cigarettes & weed (as those are daily & the hardest to not use daily). What I consider my problem is that I am young & proven intelligent, but am willing to throw my life away at the moment to escape from sobriety. The only things I will not touch are JWH (Spice, K2), Anti-psychotics, & Solvents/Inhalants. My reasoning is that JWH almost killed me in overdose, anti-psychotics kill my though pattern, & solvents are so unsafe to me that I don't wanna huff 'em. Sorry if my thoughts seem scattered. I just started taking Zyban to quit smoking & am looking for some support from those who have kicked Stimulants.
 
Wow Cid,

U got a lot of potential for a really decent life - I did many moons ago, never thought my little dabble here and there would lead my life into such a shitter. I am deeply unhappy but making the best of what I got - unfortunately that means using amp to get through the day in a positive, motivated fashion.
I successfully kicked a 1/4 coke a day habit, more at weekends, which lasted near 3 years - I got into a rather frowned upon, immoral profession to fund my habit - I eventually quit at the realisation that coke made me aggressive, selfish, uncaring, I was at that point just doing it for doing its sake, and the money I had spent - I could own my own home instead of living in the mini hell hole that I do. That realisation halted my coke abuse in its tracks - I did get tempted but managed to resist, kept minimum - zero contact with coke friends, and had 3 months of total cleanlines. By this time I was feeling frustrated and angry with my life, and myself for allowing it to come to the state its in. I had little motivation or desire - even taking my baby to the park was a chore. I located a supply of base(speed, slightly stronger, usually yellowish paste) I originally just hammered it at work, and little bitsto get me through the days at home. Looking back I shudda seen psych, but chose to self medicate. I'm now facing a choice of truth telling psych extent of abuse, taper - no longer an option as I've just found out having an op 22nd or cold turkey.
Best advise I can give is give yourself motivation to abstain- list all the things your drug abuse has cost you, money, jobs, friendships etc. Think where you ideally like to be in 10 years time, the steps you would have to take to get there - and then how, if your drug use continued, it would stop you. Stear clear from people and situations that could tempt you to use - and if needs be, consider consulting a shrink, truthfully detailing your drug use and. The reasons you think cause your urge/need to use stimulants. This is a last resort for me, having been sectioned twice and threatened with an enforced stay I psych care should I abruptly stop my lithium again, I feel they would see my use as a deliberate attempt to sabotage the lithium therapy and feel justified into forcing me into a stay in psych care.
My cold turkey begins tomorrow - I'll let you know how I Get on. If unsuccessful there's gonna be a few desperate post from me next week until I cave and see my psych.
Wish me luck, as I do you - and should you find something that helps quit the stims, please let me know!
MM x
 
Dexstarr, I'm glad that you moved from lurking to posting. It sounds like you are wanting to make a change and TDS can be a great support. <3

Bri, I am very sorry to hear that you had to stop seeing a therapist that you had built such a good relationship with. It takes a lot of time and effort to establish a relationship like that. I hope TDS can help. I would guess 100% of us here know what it is like to be our own worst enemy but you will find a lot of support for changing that.<3

manicmama and ugly--you two are awesome and strong. Good luck! You deserve it.<3


Cid, check out the amphetamines megathread if you haven't already.<3
 
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