sekio
Bluelight Crew
Thank you for sharing, this helps me consider the various perspectives of how this could appear.
Yreah, that sort of behavior is really not appropriate. I confess, I feel similarly these days, sometimes society is so backwards I wonder how we survive at all. It's not hard to come up with a better location to do such a thing in though. While expressing yourself and venting is healthy in some contexts, doing so along a street in active use is probably not the correct context. You're not going to have a very attentive audience, for one, and for two you are easily mistaken for someone having a mental break, if you are not obviously talking to anyone in particular.
Hypothetically if you were to do a similar thing, except standing at a church lectern addressing the congregation, it would seem much less out of place. I don't even think it would be that hard to find someone willing to let you speak, provided you had a written outline and it was not too off-the-wall.
So the cops ticketed you 7 times and you kept coming back for more? I'm sorry, what was your thought process there? Were you nor aware it is almost universally accepted rule that you don't fuck around with American police? You know, the people who have the power to totally fuck your life over at a drop of a hat? You ever heard the infamous definition of insanity? It's something like - doing the exact same thing over and over but hoping for a different response. I'm actually amazed that they were patient enough to let you do it 7 times. (The cat came back, the very next day... the cat came back, they thought he was a goner... but the cat came back, he just wouldn't stay awaaaaay!)
I have a sneaking suspicion that your arrest and psych hold was because the cops were getting awfully tired of telling you to stop. I imagine they were running out of options and growing frustrated. They're not going to spend all day driving you away from your corner, they have better shit they could be doing. And your choice of venue to express your views on religion... people in their cars don't generally pay attention to what people on the street are screaming.
In fact, a healthier outlet might have been a Bluelight blog or something....
Anyway, what do you think about my conclusions? I still believe that you are both deserving, and able to live a more fulfilling life, but I really do suggest you look into finding someone who can help you manage whatever sort of strange activity your brain decides to do. I believe that whatever your underlying mental illness may be (again, this is a mere suggestion, but I think maybe OCD or some sort of anxiety,, knowing and understanding it first, and treating it appropriately afterwards, it would only make you feel better.
It can take a brave person to admit they are not behaving the way they remember acting, and seek help for such a problem, but the rewards are worth it, IMO.)
Yreah, that sort of behavior is really not appropriate. I confess, I feel similarly these days, sometimes society is so backwards I wonder how we survive at all. It's not hard to come up with a better location to do such a thing in though. While expressing yourself and venting is healthy in some contexts, doing so along a street in active use is probably not the correct context. You're not going to have a very attentive audience, for one, and for two you are easily mistaken for someone having a mental break, if you are not obviously talking to anyone in particular.
Hypothetically if you were to do a similar thing, except standing at a church lectern addressing the congregation, it would seem much less out of place. I don't even think it would be that hard to find someone willing to let you speak, provided you had a written outline and it was not too off-the-wall.
So the cops ticketed you 7 times and you kept coming back for more? I'm sorry, what was your thought process there? Were you nor aware it is almost universally accepted rule that you don't fuck around with American police? You know, the people who have the power to totally fuck your life over at a drop of a hat? You ever heard the infamous definition of insanity? It's something like - doing the exact same thing over and over but hoping for a different response. I'm actually amazed that they were patient enough to let you do it 7 times. (The cat came back, the very next day... the cat came back, they thought he was a goner... but the cat came back, he just wouldn't stay awaaaaay!)
I have a sneaking suspicion that your arrest and psych hold was because the cops were getting awfully tired of telling you to stop. I imagine they were running out of options and growing frustrated. They're not going to spend all day driving you away from your corner, they have better shit they could be doing. And your choice of venue to express your views on religion... people in their cars don't generally pay attention to what people on the street are screaming.
In fact, a healthier outlet might have been a Bluelight blog or something....
Anyway, what do you think about my conclusions? I still believe that you are both deserving, and able to live a more fulfilling life, but I really do suggest you look into finding someone who can help you manage whatever sort of strange activity your brain decides to do. I believe that whatever your underlying mental illness may be (again, this is a mere suggestion, but I think maybe OCD or some sort of anxiety,, knowing and understanding it first, and treating it appropriately afterwards, it would only make you feel better.
It can take a brave person to admit they are not behaving the way they remember acting, and seek help for such a problem, but the rewards are worth it, IMO.)
