Chicago Heroin v. The return of Chinky

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Oh yeah i pit on weight but thats cause i came out of 9mo of jail too..and i went to livin pretty much on my own and not really eating right to getting out and moms says you can move here and get settled and the fridge is always stocked with goods and so is the pantry full of sweets..so when you go back to just smokin weed and have all this food you are fucked lol munchies are brutal, especially when im the one that does the shopping so i can buy what the fuck i want..oh wellall the more the next time i go on a year or 2 binge..well fuck i had my own little rules and didnt really use back to back days just everyother but i didnt take more then a few days off to pass drug tests for like 4-5years..
 
@pizza. I was trying to walk gingerly around that sucking black cock for dope while he's gone, (not sure how much truth the kid can handle) but you hit that shit right on the head.
@SS1. You are in a very similar situation as me and my girl. doesn't smoke,drink, party...nothing. I never tried to cook meth on my back porch though. I wonder how that would go over. It's a treasure and a burden all at the same time. I know where you are comming from.
@NSB and Chink. I tend to lose a lot of weight when I start straight slipping(my girl tells me my cheeks are sinking in). The only time when I actually took notice of my fatassidness was when i was on house arrest this past summer and it was really quite disturbing b/c I have never seen myself that fat in the shower. NSB, I don't know shit about subs, usually when I attempt to quit, I just grin and bear it and get ready for a bumpy ride. ...St Elizabeth...What a fucking dive dude. Been there when I crashed my motocycle and broke my clavicle.(collar bone) They just gave me a bunch of shit and I was wondering the hallways in no time...talking shit.
Hey NSB "why not" got you where you are at right now man. That's why not! Dude, the only time I can eat now-adays, is when I'm high. It used to be the complete opposite. That's OK, cause I'm gonna take a break. I need to regroup and refocus.
Pizza, thanks for the job! If it's any cosolation, I've had quite a few jobs in my lifetime and never been fired once...ever! LOL!
Be safe folks. Take care peeps.
 
Hey northside, reading your texts actually makes me feel good about having been clean for almost 2 months now. Not trying to put you down but it's true. Your story sounds oh so familiar to me. In fact it mirrors my addiction. You describe yourself and I picture me. And as far as funeral homes go, I have been to 12....all for overdose or suicide. It's pathetically sad that I have been close to 12 people all under the age of 30. Well one of them was 33 I think. But yeah, what a fucking waste of life
 
Yeah, that's just the matchbook for my friend that's sitting in front of me...that's not counting other OD's or peeps that just couldn't take it and blew their brains out, or hung themselves.
2 months clean, congratulations...seriously. I've been on and off for over 10 years since my first treatment (not using, i started with kid shit around 13, tried dope for the first time in like 87 or 88, and since then it's been just a question of how low can I stand it, when can I move to get away from it, and how can i find a connection...)

But last night, fucking RLS, for the second night in a row. Feet just buzzing and fucking bothering me and couldn't stay still. So I took 2 mg of sub and willed myself to pass out again around 3am. The thing is, I can't keep sucking down the benzos, I don't want to establish the regular sub use, I'm not opposed to buying another jab, just cause I'm built that way, but that won't last and I'll be in the same shape again on Monday or so...so maybe some of that Nyquil stuff that's like 100% diphen will helpme sleep through it, i don't know.

I got a real strong feeling I'm just gonna say fuck it and pick up a pack today for relief. There goes fucking christmas and getting my car fixed and being an honest upstanding father and husband...once again. I got all next week off work again (too many unused V days - use en or lose em, and I'll use em, thank you very much, I've got plans to repaint the kitchen and some shit to make my wife happy).

for some reason it all makes sense to me. but good on you Shooter. I don't feel like youre putting me down or nothing. Really, it's the internet. Not much someone can say on here that's gonna get under my skin, for real.
 
Yeah Im not really trying to stay clean. It has just worked out that way. Around central illinois the dope is here but not in nearly the abundance that it is in the city. Also my car is fucked up too right now so I have been going to work with my father in law. Dope sounds lovely always....just can't find anything worth buying right now. I'm not gonna go buy some bull shit just because there isn't a better source. I enjoy my hard earned money better than a bag that is probably only 1/8 dope. Although I am pleased that I have a little time under my belt, it really pisses me off I can't find anything right now. Gayness
 
Damn northside with all that time off and it is gonna be next to impossible to not grab something, that's for sure. Especially if you were gonna paint the house and shit. Weed doesn't help you? Are you able to ration your dope and keep it to just staying well most of the time? Do you get the time from the day after Xmas till New Year's Day off? Could you just use till the 26th and just go cold till the 1st and maybe take 1 mg of sub the first day back to work and you will actually have some kpins to help with the anxiety and ween off from there? It's the months after that are brutal that push you to go score. Any little stress makes us wanna say fuck it. The restless legs were the worst. No matter what it is sleepless nights, I would only get 30 min here and there in the bathtub the first 3 weeks, the hot water helps. Can you get a script for adderal? That helps with work with a combo of it with kpins or valuim, because the adderall will add to the anxiety but keep you active and that helps bigtime. Any exercise helps but when your sick it is fucking impossible to do shit unless it going to score
 
shooter, nsb, today is the first day in a while since i didnt get up up and get high. Congrats to all of you. Pizza, I have never been as bougee as gettin scripts for what ails me but fuck it, im done with this shit. Yeah, pizza, exercise. That's always advocated but is impossible.
 
yeah, I heard somewhere that having it is like having a hug from your loving mom. And not having it is like getting your ass beaten by a stepfather.
NSB Congrats to you, man. Havent talked in a while... You can shit. Congrats on that also... lol.
 
HA! ...Sheiit gots some Newports n shit... Holy shit! Arlington Heights! I just noticed that. We're neighbors, I'm in Mt Prospect.
 
Visiting my sis in Ashburn, VA until 12/8. I'm looking for some help while out here. Only contact me if legit...trust when I say I ain't no mark. Will be visiting here often, so looking for long term connect. Am not mobile, so need u to meet me. [email protected]
 
LOL! What like a cadillac Catera or one of those old 72 Delta 88 looking caddyies? I never really had a shitting problem, exept when I have the runs when I'm going without. The runs are the worst! Basically waste a whole roll of tp ihe mostn a couple of hours. The runny eyes and nose is what kind of bothers me te mosthe most...Fuck it all bothers me the most! Been fucking up the last few weeks. See, I kind of neglect my nutritional needs when I'm getting high and it seems like the only time I'm able to even look at food, is when I'm at least well. I have to try to tap the brakes a little but what it makes it really difficult is the fact that the dude I get the shit from, has been consistently getting straight FIRE shit. But at the same time, I feel like it's fucking up a lot of shit in my personal life. My g/f hates it and wants to dole them out. ...Or she's cicking me thr fuck out of the house,...
Fuck it I've tortured myself trying to type(and anyone trying to read my bullshit Thanks.).
Take care folks
be careful.
 
oregon boy said:
Visiting my sis in Ashburn, VA until 12/8. I'm looking for some help while out here. Only contact me if legit...trust when I say I ain't no mark. Will be visiting here often, so looking for long term connect. Am not mobile, so need u to meet me. [email protected]
Click to expand...
I'm not "legit" enough...But you can call me at 1 800 EAT-SHIT. Keep looking you'll find someone legit on here that will be willing to bend over and take it in the ass, oh dimwitted one...
...Willis... Hehehe. Did you put on that Gary Colman look on your face as you said that? Its "Whatcha talking about Willis" That's the only way it works. That face does wonders when you're trying to take a dump! LOl
Peace brother.
 
I hear ya...and I sure as hell won't snap back at y'all talking some shit about my post. It's sketchy...but I look at it as I got 2 options...suck it up and wait til I get home (which has notoriously shitty black that is WAAAAYYYY over priced) or try doin what I'm doin here on BL and maybe come up with somethin. Worth a shot at least...empty mouths don't get fed, do they?
 
Man I'm too legit to quit! M.C. Hammer negro! Whatchyall fools know bout dat??? Too legit....too legit to quit.....lolololololo!!! I make myself laugh.....hard lol. I'm bout to buss a move on all yall in my gold parachute pants and shit.....and then go bankrupt like 2 years later....and then join death row records in a sorry attempt at a come back....but fail epically
 
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;>{) check out my mustache guy. Kinda sweet. I came up on some raw today...well I guess it was yesterday now lol. Summa dat straight kill bill shit. So much for 2 months of being clean right? Lol I gives no fuck really. I wasn't trying to stay clean anyways.....just don't wanna spend my hard earned loot on garbage. And my habit is non existent right now so that biiiatch hit a honkey like a 72 delta 88. Great googly moogly. Holy catfish. So much for the nice soft poo poo also. Back to pushing out wascawy wabbit shit
 
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