Beenhead
Bluelight Crew
spacing trips widely will insure better integration along with added safety for the 'ol noggin. Id say at least a month
and i had used it previously at the same dose without such intense effects.
Delsyd said:10mg plugged is comparable to how many mg oral?
18mg orally gave me a trip i was barely prepared for. im waiting till i step it up to 20mg (especially after reading MGS's warning about each 2mg making it twice as strong.)
zophen said:Hmmmm say 15 approx, I find many RCs variable I guess it just happens how well they engage with the brain chemically (a complete guess) but given I used stuff from same package n got very variable resonses to same doses, be aware of that.
One day 15 is a nice easy bit of a laugh time, then next time the same dose can be heavier by quite a bit !!!
Xorkoth said:7 or 8 mgs is a good place to start. Just don't expect too much at that level. However, you may be pleasantly surprised. 2C-E is indeed an excellent chemical. One of the best in existence, really. Be careful and enjoy![]()
I set up this day to take a light dose of 2C-E. It is my hope that the lighter amount will elevate me into higher energy than normal, allow me to accomplish the ordinary tasks of the day more efficiently, and enjoy a higher state of "Presence." I also hope to learn to overcome resistances to chores, as has happened with previous small doses of other substances. In addition, I wish to find out if the dose will be light enough to not stir up the deep, uncomfortable feelings I almost always encounter with this substance.
I take 8 m.g. of 2C-E. I decide to work on a paper I had once started on how this material level of creation came into being. I think the paper starts well, but I can't see how to continue past where I had stopped before, when single-celled life came into being.
I lie on the sofa. I realize I don't know shit. How preposterous, to speculate creation!! I don't even know how an amoeba came into being, or if anyone does!
I look at the vastness of the unknown. I can see how fearless exploration with these substances might lead to gaining knowledge of how life came into being. I realize that the universe has been created in love. Then I experience the roaring anger of not knowing, which brings me back to the keyboard to write again. The following are my live notes:
This is a raging, raging anger. I don't know, and I absolutely hate not knowing, but at the same time I don't want to do what it takes to learn!! What a dilemma!! The dilemma of the world!!
At two hours, this is getting very intense. I am surprised at the intensity. I am typing perfectly!!! This is a real change, as I ordinarily fill the page with typos. I am going through a great struggle. I feel the need to stay conscious, in control, master inner feelings and work as a conscious human being. Right now this feels good. . .
Ten hours later: I had decided to go to my meditation rock (described in Appendix III). When I arrived there, I was feeling awful, dragging a heavy load. I was out of breath and had to force myself to climb the hill, which I was determined to do. A brief look around did not bring my accustomed contact with the Numinous. I lay back and relaxed with eyes closed.
I would really be a writer if I could describe what happened. I simply put myself in the hands of God, and all the discomfort began to slide away. This contact is the only contact in life that is important. It leads to everything worthwhile. But mostly it permits simply settling into what we really are, our true inner Self. Here I am tempted to use flowery adjectives, or expansive descriptions. But no, it is simply who we are. Resting there, being there, is beyond any description. Wonder? Glory? Profundity? As far as I can stretch my mind, the adjectives won't do. All the little devices, the little tricks I used to use to encourage me into this state, all seem terribly inept and even manipulative. Allowing? Letting? Are these better words? As I struggle for expression, the feeling once again comes over me. I want to do everything I possibly can to encourage it, to deepen it, to remember it in a way that can never be forgotten. All I can do is ask. The rest is up to Him.
But that's not true. I can do a lot! Prepare the way for the Lord! I see myself shouting, screaming, calling forth glorious music. Yes, prepare a way! And that way is an emptying out, a total cleansing so that He may enter an untarnished room, free of any dross whatsoever, and fill it with His radiance. Don't put new wine in old wineskins. But how can we possibly make it clean enough, pure enough for His Holiness?
Only in the clean, pure fire of love. Nothing else will do. It is love that burns out the dross. It is love that purifies and cleanses.
Light the fire of 2C-E! Let the flames burn away the dross, burnish the core of radiance that awaits to shine forth!
I was stuck with this concept of creating the clean space, what it really means, and is it truly necessary? Not knowing how to proceed, I abandoned my writing. Now, three days later, being driven through the Owens Valley of Eastern California, I am continuing my report:
It is strange that just rereading what I wrote before and starting to think about it considerably raises my consciousness as I look at the mountains around me. This drive through the Owens Valley is a truly outstanding one. Surrounded by towering mountains on both sides of the valley, the views are very inspiring. I was blocked at the time by what it meant to prepare the clear space. Now as I think about it, it is what I have been saying for some time. The cleanliness is the purity of mind, the creating of the clear, empty space that God can enter. We don't throw away our past experiences or our memories, but it is our consciousness that we clear.
It is interesting that we spent the day yesterday hiking in the mountains with a student of Tibetan Buddhist meditation. We discussed a number of factors concerning reaching and maintaining a stable, clear mind. I have to say at this point in time that the best aid I know to getting the most realization from these psychedelic experiences, as well as on a day-to-day basis, is the mind training of utter stillness. It is this stillness which allows the Celestial to manifest itself in our consciousness, and to become our constant companion.
This trial with only 8 m.g. of 2C-E brought forth many lessons. The outstanding ones are:
1. To set intention with full consciousness.
2. Having set intention, to not let feelings interfere. The fact that I am uncomfortable is no reason not to carry out the intention. I feel I have grown a lot in inner strength today by my willingness to act despite how I felt. Of course if the feelings are powerful, I must sit down and resolve them. Two good ways: The best is to surrender completely to the Divine, or Inner Teacher, and allow developments and understanding to unfold. This usually dissolves the feelings and often brings understanding. Another very useful technique is Gendlin's focusing procedure(8), which helps to rapidly arrive at the core of the feelings and obtain release. But there is something also to be said for simply growing in inner strength sufficiently to ignore some of the habitual responses and drop them by the wayside.
3. Willingness to act. I am recognizing more frequently a deep slothfulness within me. It might be based in anger; a large component is no doubt the sheer habit of laziness developed in childhood, when I was well taken care of by solicitous parents and didn't have to put myself out. Taking action focuses and generates energy and overcomes resistance.
4. Energy is mobilized by the depth of intention. This experience gave me an excellent opportunity to experience my resistances, and deepening intention mobilized the strength to dissolve them away. It has consequently left me with more energy and freedom of action.
5. Learning to relax and be in tune with my center. I became acutely aware of my compulsiveness, my anxiety to push rapidly through things, even my strained breathing. I can relax and let the universe join me in what I am doing, feel the marvelous sense of Presence, be aware of it, enjoy it, and take as much time as is necessary to get the job done. I became aware of how the mind skips over things, anticipates the end without allowing full participation in the deed. Full participation, which also means full awareness, is easy, effortless, enjoyable, competent. It is like being constantly accompanied by one's lover. This is the way I always want to function.
In summary, despite the initial discomfort, I had a most rewarding experience of Pure Being, immersed in the fullness of the One, and an impressive glimpse of the superb beauty of the feminine nature which seems to be my soul. Several hours were devoted to wearing away my internal resistances and learning to function with my feelings as they are. This resulted in a marvelous day following the experience, when I was rejuvenated, whole, full of energy, and feeling enormously competent. A hike two days after the experience was most refreshing to the body. It was my highest climb in many months, and was negotiated almost effortlessly.
I am finding that my pattern after 2C-E runs something like this: The day after is one of great rejuvenation, centeredness, strength, and energy. This is followed by some disruptions as I learn to accommodate the new energy that has been released. There may also be some fresh upheavals of new unconscious material which may take a day or two or three to integrate. Then a new steady-state condition arrives, which most of the time is on a new plateau of functioning.
With the smaller dose, this aftermath has transpired rapidly. I am awed at the power and effectiveness of such a low dose. In fact, it seems that the lower amount is much more effective in dealing with problems close to where you live, and improving day-to-day functioning.
Low Doses.
One of the interesting developments in the 2C-E research was the discovery of the efficacy of this substance at relatively low dose levels. Reports came in of excellent results with difficult psychiatric cases at the 10 m.g. level. Jean and I began experimenting more at this level, and found it very effective.
We found that 10 m.g. was a very appropriate introductory level for subjects with prior experience with psychedelics. In our first trials with new persons, I often warned them that my own experience with 2C-E indicated that it was a hard working material. This meant that much of the time one might be forced to confront uncomfortable feelings, so that the journey might not be pleasant. This was compensated for by the improved state of being which followed the experience.
This turned out to be inaccurate information. While it held true for me, it didn't seem to hold true for others. With at least a dozen other subjects, the experience was found not only rewarding but enjoyable. In fact, all of our trials with other persons employing 2C-E have been very fulfilling experiences, including new learning, increased bonding of participants, wonderful feelings of closeness and heightened energy, access to high level realizations, and rejuvenation following the experience.
In one case a couple who invariably had extremely uncomfortable experiences with 2C-B and 2C-T-2 found 2C-E at the 10 m.g. level very enjoyable as well as useful.
I was often surprised at the power of such a low dose. The composition of the group has a significant bearing on the ensuing results. One experience with 17 m.g. did not reach as much intensity or clarity or deep, solid, good feeling as another with 10 m.g. in a different grouping.
The section entitled Bill and Joanna in Chapter 11 contains a description of how outstanding an experience of 10 m.g. of 2C-E can be with very close friends.