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Is it OK to spank a child?

GenericMind said:
Kids need to be spanked sometimes. Period. I don't know about at 13-months, but by 2 for sure. Even if it's not hard enough to cause any pain whatsoever they get the picture.

If someone physically tried to take my child from me for disciplining them I'd literally try to smash their face in.
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Then I'd have taze or possibly resort to lethal force during my effecting arrest for assault or assault/bodily harm, along with obstruct police resist arrest and assault peace officer. In line with the use of force wheel as I came upon this violent indictable(felony) offense.

and I'd enjoy it.

At least here, the constitution says all people are equal before and under the law, therefore, a child is owed the same to be free of assaults that an adult is.
 
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rant*N*rave said:
HA! Nothing more to say here... Some kids are just BAD. I've been witness to it a zillion times over. Kids are frequently assholes until they're old enough to understand what they're doing, which can be well into grade school.
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A kid can't be an asshole, by virtue of being a kid. Due to this lack of understanding that you mention, kids can be compared to animals. I equally think there are no bad animals. If there's a 'bad' animal, or a 'bad' kid, there will be a reason why this child/animal is 'bad'. Then sadly the child/animal becomes labelled as 'bad', and it becomes a self fulfilling prophesy.

I find it odd that some people posting here sound like they had less than good parents, were smacked as kids, other posts demonstrate some quite fucked up behaviours, and yet they are advocating the way they were smacked and disciplined as children. It sounds quite contradictory to me. I don't want to quote specific personal examples, as that would be unfair and involve posts made in other threads.

I'd say the proof is in the pudding as it were, and some of the people posting here aren't exactly/haven't been in the past, poster kids for the way they were raised. No offence intended if anyone feels this may apply to them.
 
badandwicked said:
I find it odd that some people posting here sound like they had less than good parents, were smacked as kids, other posts demonstrate some quite fucked up behaviours, and yet they are advocating the way they were smacked and disciplined as children. It sounds quite contradictory to me.
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It is very odd, but it's just human nature. Although some children who had physically-disciplinary parents grow up to be the opposite type of parent to their children, the fact of the matter is that more often, those kids just learn that physical punishment is the only/best way to disclipline children (even though they didn't like being physically punished themselves). So they end up doing it to their kids because they don't inherently know any other way of dealing with deliquency. It's a vicious cycle.
 
You thoroughly misunderstand. This woman was practically my surrogate mom when I was little. My mom was finishing law school and working, and my dad was working crazy hours. Our neighbor was a stay-at-home mom with two kids, and she watched me during the day while my parents were at work. This woman was in tears over having spanked me, but she didn't know what else to do - I was a smart kid, and I knew not to go in the street, and I did it anyways. I had been told a million times never to do it. I did it because I thought it was funny (I did *tons* of fucked up shit as a little kid that I thought was hilarious and terrified the fuck out of my parents). My mom thanked her for doing it, and we had a conversation about why my behavior was wrong and all that. This wasn't some random lady or babysitter hitting me; this was a woman that was entrusted with my care a HUGE amount of every week.
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I see. I suppose it isn't "inappropriate" in that situation then. All I know is it makes my blood boil thinking of someone hitting my children.

And how the fuck is a slap in the face child abuse.. u guys pussssy
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It truly scares me that there are people in this world with this attitude. :( Let me guess: slapping a woman in the face isn't abusive either? :\

Then I'd have taze or possibly resort to lethal force during my effecting arrest for assault or assault/bodily harm, along with obstruct police resist arrest and assault peace officer. In line with the use of force wheel as I came upon this violent indictable(felony) offense.

and I'd enjoy it.

At least here, the constitution says all people are equal before and under the law, therefore, a child is owed the same to be free of assaults that an adult is.
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A-fucking-men to that.

It is very odd, but it's just human nature. Although some children who had physically-disciplinary parents grow up to be the opposite type of parent to their children, the fact of the matter is that more often, those kids just learn that physical punishment is the only/best way to disclipline children (even though they didn't like being physically punished themselves). So they end up doing it to their kids because they don't inherently know any other way of dealing with deliquency. It's a vicious cycle.
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Yes. :(
 
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MynameisnotDeja said:
Hitting a child in the face is child abuse. Period.
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I agree a child... under the age of 13. But a young adult 13-18 who straight says "fuck you" to either of the parents. Or skips school repeatedely for 10 weeks straight and has threee friends covering his ass and get caught. Sometimes 1 good baby powdered smack would be good. In my case of being a crazy 16-20 year old. There is times when I shoulda been BEAT by my father im talking black eye. Bruised ribs and the works. I put them through hell and I honestly think I would have learned my lesson if they would used more than "stop" or the "we're calling the police" (which they did sometimes, but I would hide in my basements cupboard or run around the back of my house to a neighbors on the other side of the street. When I was 10 I use to play tee ball with the neighbors dad and his 7 and 6 year old boys, and he would let me hide out if shit got hectic for a little bit.

And DEFINITELY when I was living in my parents home from my 18th bday till I was 18 and a half they had every right to beat me like a man.. the legal man I was for the hsit I did. Selling drugs from their house because my old hang out got too hot.... Snorting heroin, and leaving just enough dust on a cd to get caught (they knew the difference between coke and heroin.... coke was bad enough to them but HEROIN, was the fucking devil in their eyes) The times I would binge on ecstasy and adderall and end up destroying shit around the house when i was out of drugs (never super expensive stuff) I deserved a real beatdown like a beatdown I received twice in highschool once sucker punched and wailed on after school (did something shady), and once at a party for running my mouth too much) Thats why I moved out at 18.5 with my girl I couldn't put them through that anymore and the illegal activities were piling up and I didn't want their house seized or assets taken due to MY irresponsible behavior.
 
I completely understand the different approaches to this subject but I think the reality is (as long as it's not child abuse) it's up to the parents in the particular circumstance and particular child. I agree that it's difficult, if not impossible, to place judgment on parents who have spanked their kids in a reasonable format. That said, most people commenting on here DON'T have children of their own and to post their opinions on the subject, though totally reasonable to do so, is probably less valuable than those who do. It is fairly irrelevant, IMO, how much you have cared for and looked after children outside a parental role.

Additionally, environment is entirely subject to what is 'reasonable' in terms of punishment. I don't think we can entirely understand each other without that concept in mind. I think we can collectively agree that 'child abuse' is abhorrent and unacceptable but the lines of what 'child abuse' actually construes is questionable. With all this aforementioned I will put forth my (biased and socially-conceptualized) beliefs:

1. Children should not be hit in any way unless ABSOLUTELY necessary
2. Children who are hit with reasonable and prescribed (thought out and non-hate worthy) punishment is not child abuse (i.e. not a reaction based on anger or hate or any other provocation emotion)
3. There is ALMOST always a better way to deal with 'punishment' (I think the better term is growth) for a child than hitting.

That said, if all avenues are tried with a child and all things have not worked, I won't negatively judge a PARENT for disciplining their child with a light spanking. I understand the philosophical negatives of spanking but, in reality, when a child won't stop throwing eggs at a car even after a long discussion about how it's wrong by a parent and then a very stern talking-to (which-forth brought a time out/grounding) I can completely understand why a parent would have a light spanking as the end.

All this said, I DON'T have a child therefore I say this entirely off the cuff and believe my opinion is probably 'less' than that of an actual parent. :)
 
Shit guys and gals- I'm glad I didn't grow up in your country. Those of you that think it's ok to beat a child probably don't know any better, but those of you that think it was ok for you to be beaten as a child and will do the same to your own children. Oh dear God-you scare the crap out of me.
 
did you not read what this was in response to? BEEF/N/BROKLY and Lacey both said their kids would deserve a smack for breaking their hard-earned television, which is an accident. i understand that breaking the t.v. was a consequence of them doing something they weren’t supposed to: rough-playing in the house. and sure i can understand some people don’t have a backyard to shoo their child into, but that doesn’t give you an excuse to take the easiest method available and spank. i provided only two examples of alternate methods of either redirection to prevent the accident or punish the rule-breaking. you could also take half of their saved allowance (and then immediately deposit it into a savings account specifically for your kid)… i don’t know. i’m not there, yet… i’m not sure which toy or thing or whatever my child is going to miss most if it were taken away.
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LOL....Allowance?

That right there is just a perfect example, of how the attitudes of some folks in here is just so, completely, totally different. Thats all it is. You assume that the kid has an allowance?

I feel like the way that so many people in here was raised, is just so fucking different, so many worlds away from the way that i was, that is the reason that you just dont comprehend the ideas Im saying. this shit about having a respectful adult conversation with a kid who wont listen to reason at all and is throwin a total fit, or who did some bad-ass shit, and giving him one minute of time out for every year of his life, and takin money out of his "SAVED" allowance, not even his allowance but the allowance that you also assume that he saved up....its just so, so far away from the world i was raised in that i honestly really cant comprehend some of the shit yall saying that you think is effective.

Let me tell you, I aint ashamed in no way at all to say that if i was sittin there, watchin the TV after me and his father bust our fuckin ASSES on multiple jobs eery day to work and support this kid, and he suppose to be chillin and behave him self, and he keeps runnin around throwin his ball in the house or wtfever, and I tell him to stop, and i turn that shit off and be like yo, u need to calm ya lil bad ass down and sit still becuz you know you shouldnt be doin that shit in the house and you gonna make a mess and fuck somethin up, and after that he keeps doin it, and i be like yo, you seriously trying me lil man, I aint playin you need to stop that , you aint gotta be runnin in the livin room and doin all this you know that aint allowed inside the house...And then he keeps doin it, and he throws his lil ball or watever it is and is running to tacth it and knocks over the TV into the table and it breaks...You better BELIEVE that I am gonna spank that ass!

You dont smack your kid becuz he spills his fuckin milk or somethin like that, but shit. Something like that aint just a innocent little accident...Its somethin they did that they repeatedly aint listen to you and you warned them and try to get them to stop in another way first, and then they go and BREAK somethin that you saved up for such a long time to buy, that you worked so hard to get, that is the only TV your family got and you cant afford to buy another one cuz you could barely afford to buy that one, and he broke that shit by doin somethin that he KNEW he wasnt suppose to be doin?

Forget about it yo, that kids gettin a butt whuppin.

like i said...Honestly i think this is a lot of a cultural thing...I was raised in a environment where this type shit was completely normal, natural, acceptable, regular shit, and I dont see nothing wrong with it at all. Obviously it was a joke but if anybody remembers the skit on dave chappelle show where he was talkin about "white people dont beat they kids enough these days" and shit like that....Its obviously just aint only a racial thing but i really feel like that is true. People have went from one extreme to another. It use to be horrible punishmens for the littlest things and that was wrong too. But now they so far onto the oppposite side which is just some weak shit to me.

I think somethin like this where me or someone like me is in this conversation....that its just 2 worlds that aint gonna see eye to eye. Its 2 totally different lifestyles and ways of gettin raised, and to yall you will just never see a way that it could possibly be a totally normal , regular, aint-nothin-wrong-with-it thing to smack your kid, and i will never see it how many of yall do.

Liek io said the shit with the allowance was a perfect way to illustrate that divide. People sayin, Well take away their allowance, or take away their TV, etc.....Like my kid would have his own TV, or an allowance...the fuck outta here...lots of people cant afford that. Lots of people cant just put their kids in the backyard cuz they aint got one, and they cant send em outside cuz its trouble out there and they dont want them seein drug deals and shit liek that goin down. When your kid aint got a TV to take away, aint got allowance nevermind SAVED allowance, when your kid aint got all this shit you can take away from em, there is a lot less options yo.

I really dont think that people will see any other side but i think that some of the suggestions, etc that people make as a alternative just show how much that the people saying them dont quite understand the reality of everybody in this thread, u feel me.
 
lacey k said:
Liek io said the shit with the allowance was a perfect way to illustrate that divide. People sayin, Well take away their allowance, or take away their TV, etc.....Like my kid would have his own TV, or an allowance...the fuck outta here...lots of people cant afford that. Lots of people cant just put their kids in the backyard cuz they aint got one, and they cant send em outside cuz its trouble out there and they dont want them seein drug deals and shit liek that goin down. When your kid aint got a TV to take away, aint got allowance nevermind SAVED allowance, when your kid aint got all this shit you can take away from em, there is a lot less options yo.
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qfmft
 
christ almighty, it was an example!

for the record, i wasn't given an allowance when i was a child - my mother was barely a high-school educated working woman and my step-father was in prison for selling meth. my own father was too much of an alcoholic to contribute anything, attention or otherwise. after my sister was born, we moved out of a predominately Mexican neighborhood when our neighbor burned the house down behind us; then we moved to a fucking rat- and cockroach- infested trailer home out in the middle of nowheresville Texas. we didn’t move up to middle-class until my mom received a large inheritance and my step-dad was out of prison which occured when i was 14.

don't tell me for one minute i don't understand what it's like to live on that side of the tracks. and don't fault me for wanting something better for my child.

the allowance idea was just ONE example; you could make them clean their room, make them write the same sentence 100 times, make them do push-ups or sit-ups, make them stay in their room (which even in a household than can afford it, i disagree with children having a television or computer in), make them read a book and then write an essay on it, make them go to bed without dinner, tell them they can't go play with so-n-so for a week, or cancel some fun plans that were made BUT stick by them. there's a billion different creative options, i gave one.

i do understand though that it is tougher on people in lower social classes, who, btw, are most likely to discipline by spanking. usually both parents are at best, high-school educated and constantly working or it's a single-parent household and it's even tougher to keep tabs on your kids. i can see that a parent who's already dealing with a lot of stress and doesn't really have the time or patience to punish their children without spanking might view it as an easier alternative. i see that; though i also feel that if i couldn't devote my time or energy to guiding and teaching my children as a parent without resorting to violence, i have no business being a parent.

and i don't mean that as any disrespect to you or anyone else. these are MY thoughts and feelings. the only way i'd feel comfortable parenting is by adhering to my long list of criteria that i've put into place for myself.

part of why i involved myself in this thread is because it felt as if those people advocating FOR spanking couldn't understand that you can still be a strict parent without spanking; like a person who doesn't spank isn't truly disciplining their children. and i think that's incredibly untrue, unfair and unfortunate.

as long as it's legal in the country you live in, spank away. on a personal basis, however, it's just not something i will do when i have children.
 
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I got allowance for 2 years then they realized i did lots of drugs, no more allowance.... which lead to slanging... .its all your fault mom and dad! lol
 
rangrz said:
Then I'd have taze or possibly resort to lethal force during my effecting arrest for assault or assault/bodily harm, along with obstruct police resist arrest and assault peace officer. In line with the use of force wheel as I came upon this violent indictable(felony) offense.
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You're an idiot.
 
I dont believe its abuse, kids need limits, when they go over set limits a punishment is needed. Dad spanked till we were red, still never thought it was abuse 43yrs later.
 
it was mentioned that a "fuck you" from a 12 year old is similar in intent to a "no" from a 2 year old. that is EXACTLY what happened to me. the 12 year old said "fuck you", and the 5 year old said "no". and they both repeatedly refused to submit to going to their rooms. thing is, ever after that, if i say,"okay, we need some space here, go to your room,.............unless you'd rather be spanked." worked/works like a charm every time.

this does not mean that i feel right about doing it.
 
rangrz said:
Then I'd have taze or possibly resort to lethal force during my effecting arrest for assault or assault/bodily harm, along with obstruct police resist arrest and assault peace officer. In line with the use of force wheel as I came upon this violent indictable(felony) offense.

and I'd enjoy it.

At least here, the constitution says all people are equal before and under the law, therefore, a child is owed the same to be free of assaults that an adult is.
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you are a perfect example of what is so wrong with law enforcement. good thing good ones are sneaking in daily. you suck man.
 
taze or lethal force lol... dude some of the post rings true.... but taze or lethal force on GM? cmon the sweet computer guy with the glasses who drinks alcohol laden tea?

and I dont just mean GM but anyone... but using GM was fun
 
ChemicalSmiles said:
taze or lethal force lol... dude some of the post rings true.... but taze or lethal force on GM? cmon the sweet computer guy with the glasses who drinks alcohol laden tea?

and I dont just mean GM but anyone... but using GM was fun
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He was indicating he would resist with violence. I therefore use it in return. If after making him aware of his arrest, he complied, then no force beyond cuffing would be used. I recall him saying something about punching someones face in if they interfered. That brings me right up force level tazer/baton. Maybe lethal if it involved my neck. all by the book.

Toss in the fact its a violent offense...


and hell, as an Officer, I cant touch my soldiers without permission, and I'm talking adjusting their beret on their skull....if its wrong to impose on grown fighting men, its wrong to impose on kids.
 
rangrz said:
He was indicating he would resist with violence. I therefore use it in return. If after making him aware of his arrest, he complied, then no force beyond cuffing would be used. I recall him saying something about punching someones face in if they interfered. That brings me right up force level tazer/baton. Maybe lethal if it involved my neck. all by the book.

Toss in the fact its a violent offense...


and hell, as an Officer, I cant touch my soldiers without permission, and I'm talking adjusting their beret on their skull....if its wrong to impose
on grown fighting men, its wrong to impose on kids.
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i don't understand you, dude. if it's wrong to impose on grown fighting men, and it's wrong to impose on kids, why is it not wrong to impose on GM? because you disagree with him? because you think one group of people (lawmakers/police/soldiers/)has the right to impose it's will on everyone else, by whatever force they deem neccessary?

but i'll never understand the kind of person who believes he's somehow protecting my way of life by squashing someone else's. it's arrogant.
 
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