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Mental Health Mental Illness Support Thread V. How do you feel?

Have run out of my psych meds have been on lamictal for years to treat bi-polar disorder. Still have like 3 pills left I can break in half incase i become manic but I haven't taken any in a few days. Usually the sleep is what breaks me and I'll go manic and stay up for 8-9 days until I take some lamictal. It's just so expensive and I lost my health insurance and going to social service's has become issue in the city due to Covid19. But yeah I really need to figure this out because my life is more manageable on it thankfully I'm acting very sanely and not even abusing drugs like that. Been drinking too often but that's worse scenerio.

Who knows... I've stopped psych meds for years in the past and it wasn't super bad. Other times I've had nervous sorta breakdown and go to hospital or something. Obviously I'm super paranoid about going to hospital to get emergency script from there cuz of the virus contamination possiblity. I still maybe able to get a few month supply from my girls friend for free I really hope so and I can put off this a little longer. But yeah I really need to stay on the meds and I never had this problem often cuz I could always get new insurance easily, fuckin covid messes everything up.
 
Vastness said:
You're objectively OK though, presumably, wrapped in that blanket with watermelon. ;) I've never had traumatherapy so don't take this as minimising your symptoms, I mean everything I say in the most compassionate way possible. I hope you're doing alright. You know you're not really that scared little girl either, that's just what the machinations of your mind are telling you. They're not representative of reality though, and you've made it this far through life. You are not your thoughts, thoughts are not facts, and the past isn't real, not really.
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Of course the past is not real. But it feels like it would be so. Even if I have insomnia now im grateful for it because the first time in my life - I'm extremely scared of dreaming now. Coke helps and I had the first appointment with my psychotherapist who knows my whole life. I went home with a good feeling and I think I can manage it to go trough the procedure again. He said when it is not getting better by itself we have to do some special things of this Traumatherapy again... OMFG....

But now, after I told him everything I already feel a tiny bit better :) By the way I have to correct you, though... Thoughts were facts and even if you remember something that happened 30 years ago it can hurt you like it would just happen. This night I woke up minimum 20 times because I dreamt of things that happened and they were SO real i couldn't believe. I stood up then and tried to read a bit, but what should I say.... It will last a while to put all that fucking stuff into the very last corner of my brain again. It's good that I already know this is possible. Thanks for asking anyway :)

JJ
 
@Vastness
Right now im just trying ro re-learn anatomy and stuff, havet not drawn in so Long i forgot most of what i knew but om cathing Up fast so thats fun. I try tog draw something every day so what you get the habit in, plus you get training each day even if it's just a little. Maybe try that with the writing?
 
Im feeling a little better. Found three old 5htp-capsules a week ago, took them for 3 days and it feels like im now finally out of the plateau of anxiety and stress ive been on the last few weeks. Maybe placebo but thats ok.
Found 3 mushrooms yesterday, and like 70 tiiiiny baby ones so ill have to wait a while i think. Gonna look some more today though.
 
on.my.way🌿 said:
Im feeling a little better. Found three old 5htp-capsules a week ago, took them for 3 days and it feels like im now finally out of the plateau of anxiety and stress ive been on the last few weeks. Maybe placebo but thats ok.
Found 3 mushrooms yesterday, and like 70 tiiiiny baby ones so ill have to wait a while i think. Gonna look some more today though.
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I just ordered 5 htp, phenibut and GABA and I'm hopeful these substances will help me to reduce my RC-Benzo-Consume... From what I read here pure GABA must be also quite addictive, can somebody else tell me anything about it? Which experiences did you guys have with Phenibut and 5htp as I'm very depressed though... Does it really help me to create some more serotonin and noradrenalin in my brain so that I feel better? And what about harm reduction: I'm taking 20 mg Escitalopram, 2,5 mg Nomexor, the pill and 22,5 mg Amphetaminsulfate daily, this is my medication. I know I could look it up in the internet but yesterday night was quite long and I'm not in my best shape. Do I have to fear bad cross reactions?

Would be great if somebody could tell me a bit about it ,also in combination with their illnesses.

Thanks in advance,

JJ
 
You cannot mix some of those @JoEhJoEh

Taking Escitalopram and 5-HTP at the same time and could cause you to get serotonin syndrome possibly due to it being an SSRI. You should be careful with 5-HTP as it interacts with all types of drugs and I found whatever benefits to be placebo. You shouldn't risk it if you dont plan on coming off the SSRI first as it could be fatal combination.
 
Cosmic Charlie said:
You cannot mix some of those @JoEhJoEh

Taking Escitalopram and 5-HTP at the same time and could cause you to get serotonin syndrome possibly due to it being an SSRI. You should be careful with 5-HTP as it interacts with all types of drugs and I found whatever benefits to be placebo. You shouldn't risk it if you dont plan on coming off the SSRI first as it could be fatal combination.
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Thanks, that's why I'm asking. What about the GABA? Is it making the other downers just stronger?
 
GABA is a pretty useless supplement IMO ot would cause me to get niacin like flush in higher doses above gram or two. Would feel mildly relaxing for about 30mins as disappear but honestly that minor sedative effect could have been placebo do to it not crossing blood brain barrier properly. The only of those I'd be bothering with is Phenibut honestly.
 
Cosmic Charlie said:
GABA is a pretty useless supplement IMO ot would cause me to get niacin like flush in higher doses above gram or two. Would feel mildly relaxing for about 30mins as disappear but honestly that minor sedative effect could have been placebo do to it not crossing blood brain barrier properly. The only of those I'd be bothering with is Phenibut honestly.
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Ok, is it SO addictive? I never tried it but heard totally different things about it. (Phenibut)

JJ
 
Hell yeah its addictive and the withdrawals are very similar to that of a benzodiazepine. So yeah you should just use it once every 3-4 days if you can with HCL I'd say 1.5 grams is a good realm to start but I use more. It's never gonna be overly intoxicating but it's interesting in it's own way. I have been cycling Phenibut for a decade if you do it right it's one of my favorites but you gotta be mindful tolerance build quick and once your hooked your unable to sleep without it. Got addicted to Phenibut for a year once and the withdrawal was really shitty like taking 8-10 grams a day in the end. It can be an addicting drug for people but once I came back now I take lower doses spread out more
 
EDITED BC IM PARANOID

Good news regarding the situation with the abusive ex but i have loads of conflicting emotions and im quite scared
 
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Today I will get to know if he gets released awaiting trial or if they keep him there. Im really nervous can't concentrate on anything
 
I won't know until tomorrow. Ugh. I hate to wait like this. Sometimes I wish I never pressed charges. It's way too much to deal with
 
He's kept until trial! Im an emotional mess though. Just want this to be over so I can put this behind me. Not looking forward to the trial. Can't really sleep, can't eat, crying all the time.
I think I could have handled the situation better if I had not messed up my serotonin before all this but it is what it is can just try to look after myself better from now on.
 
THE POLICE FOUND A FUCKING RECORDING OF IT!!! He had saved that shit for 5 years what are the odds???? Im so happy you guys you wont believe how relieved i am like whaat the actual fuck he KNEW i had pressed charges HE STILL KEPT THE RECORDING!!
 
Not good at all xanax arrived forgot its actually so short acting its a shit sleep med

I'm loosing the plot, I'm so up and down I don't know what's withdrawal whats stopping pregabalin suddenly, and not being on an antidepressant and what's my depression trying to sneak back in, I had a blast the other day with friends DRINKING, I don't normally drink lol but for some reason in those photos of me having fun with my friends outside with music and a few drinks I looked so happy, I was actually happy, then next day felt okay, then well, don't know now *shrugs*
 
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