^ So it's a nasty drug, just via relation to PCP?
I know a lot of the shit PCP get's is from these media stories. I'll admit, yes part of my hesitancy with PCP is due to these stories, but also from meeting Dustheads and various sorts of people who are heavily in to PCP. They are sketchy people. Even the occasional users. And maybe it's due to the crowd PCP tends to draw, not the drug itself. But I'd much rather do Ketamine or something than PCP. It's flawed logic, but logic to me non the less.
My experience with Ketamine, though light, is still not as dark or evil as I'd expect PCP to be. Knowing that MXE is just like a PCP high, gives my MXE experiences a darker look. Placebo, of course. I know it's simply my subconscious thoughts making the experience more darker, perhaps even more evil. But it's how I perceive it now, and I can't help that.
Dissociates in general seem to be dark drugs. Psychedelics, seem to be the good. In other words, Psyche's are the one side, while Dissociates are the other. Of course, as I said before, I know it's not the chemical itself that's bad or good, it's simply my perception of them. Chemicals are neutral, they can't have sides, it's simply how we view them in our own light.
P.S. Just inhaled 150mg. Immediately I know this experience is going to be like the rest...partially overwhelming. Why do I continue to do such heavy doses at once? I always get this feeling of being overwhelmed, knowing it's simply too much at once. I get this feeling in my veins, like I can literally feel the chemical flowing through me, bumping into my blood walls, even getting stuck along the way, causing cramps and what not. I swear I can even see it excreting through my skin an hour or two after I dose, as though I see the physical changes it's causing me. I know this isn't healthy for me...shit, no chemical I'd consider healthy, but I continue to do this. I wouldn't call this ignorant behavior...perhaps more along the lines of stupidity. No, perhaps not even stupidity since I know what I'm doing and I know what inevitably follows.