• 🇳🇿 🇲🇲 🇯🇵 🇨🇳 🇦🇺 🇦🇶 🇮🇳
    Australian & Asian
    Drug Discussion

    Welcome Guest!
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
  • AADD Moderators: swilow | Vagabond696

your *wtf?* moments

Living with my family is like one giant wtf moment. Latest little gem occurs with a conversation between me and my youngest nephew Jesse and my sister Tania:

ME: Jesse, you need a haircut. Tell your mum to take you to the hairdresser.
JESSE: I don't trust the hairdresser.
ME: Wha? What do you mean you don't trust the hairdresser?
JESSE: I don't. I don't trust ANY hairdresser.
ME: What do you mean you don't trust them? What are they gonna do??
JESSE: I just don't trust them!
TANIA (walking in): What's wrong?
ME: Would you talk to your son? He says he doesn't trust hairdressers.
TANIA: Oh, I don't blame him. I've NEVER trusted hairdressers.

And then she goes to bed without another word.

At which point my head exploded. My family are clinically insane.
 
ihaq4weed and i have been together 2 years now, we both turn 23 in a couple of weeks. for his birthday he asked me to get him a full and authentic ninja suit.

why?

he said he would get owned if he walked into a ninjitsu-styke dojo wearing the kung-fu one he asked his dad to get him for his birthday.
 
After Lab4 a few weeks back i went mushie hunting while twisted on heaps of acid with a group of mates. I saw one mushroom on the ground and it had the world "coleman" imprinted on the cap. In that headspace i thought "what the fuck?!!" Why did it say "coleman" on the top of a mushroom.. I started to think that maybe it was a new way of advertising. Then after about 10 minutes of pondering why it said "coleman" on this mushroom i realised my hiking boots were "coleman" brand and i had infact stepped on this mushroom =D
 
endlesseulogy said:
After Lab4 a few weeks back i went mushie hunting while twisted on heaps of acid with a group of mates. I saw one mushroom on the ground and it had the world "coleman" imprinted on the cap. In that headspace i thought "what the fuck?!!" Why did it say "coleman" on the top of a mushroom.. I started to think that maybe it was a new way of advertising. Then after about 10 minutes of pondering why it said "coleman" on this mushroom i realised my hiking boots were "coleman" brand and i had infact stepped on this mushroom =D
Click to expand...

wouldnt "coleman" be written in reverse... like the mirror image
and wouldnt that need to be a fairly big soft mushroom for it to be there

[pointed out by some1 else]
 
Well mine was:
at the gym the other day minding my own business doing my weights when this weird guy comes up to me

GUY: U almost done
ME: Yep just one more set wont be long.
GUY: You should be lifting more weight
ME: No, im just doing it for endurance i don't want to build muscle
GUY: You wont build muscle by lifting more.
ME: Yes i will,isn't that the point of lifting more? i bulk up really easy, this weight is enough for me.
GUY: NO it isnt you are only cheating yourself
ME: What?
GUY: You are only cheating yourself. don't cheat yourself.
ME: I'm not, im lifting as much as i can.
GUY: You should lift more you are cheating yourself.

ME: *WTF*

Who the fuck did he think he was? telling me how to do my own gym program?! Lifting more weight = more muscle...wtf?!
 
holy shit have i got a WTF moment for you!!!!
some saturday night recently, driving up the grand parade in brighton, going to the city, i saw SPIDERMAN. this completely made my fucking brain explode. this wasnt just some guy in a costume, he was 'sneaking' around parked cars in that cool way that spiderman walks. he even had like THE PERFECT spiderman outift, and spidey-build. we sorta whizzed past him at about 60 or 70 kmh and everyone in the car just yelled out at the same time "was that SPIDERMAN??!?!?!??!?!""
 
I had a HUGE wtf moment today. I was sitting in front of the telly last night watching the footy bonging on pretty hard, anyway I fell asleep sitting bolt upright after the first quarter, I awoke from my sleep and wandered to my room VERY tired and muddled from all the hydros, I fell into bed and laid there for about a minute then looked at the clock, it was hard to tell what the time was but when I looked at it I thought I saw it say 0604 am and since I had to be at work at 0600 I jumped out of bed through my boots on and bolted out the door, jumped in the car and drove to work extremely tired and feeling fucked , when I got there I noticed that knowone was there, I thought "holy shit everyone else is late too and Im here first" (mind you only 4 people including myself work there on a saturday), so I opened up the factory and walked in to find it pitch black, I wandered around spinning off my head thinking WTF is going on, I was spooked out, it wasn't until I looked at the clock did I realise it was 1215am.....WTF!!!. I must have looked at the clock wrong and I didn't notice it was as late as it was because its dark when I get to work in the morning anyway, in the end I was kinda happy, I was able to go back to bed for another 5 hours and I wasn't late to work. True story.
 
I've done that once before. I used to get home from school and have a bit of a nap. One day I woke up to see that they time was 8 o'clock and I flipped out and jumped out of bed. Ran over to the closet and thought, "Quick I need some clothes. Oh wait I'm already wearing clothes. That's wierd."

Then I realised it was 8pm, not 8am.
 
Yeah, i've done that before too. I used to work for Queensland Rail on the TravelTrains (intrastate to Cairns, Longreach & Charleville). One trip, as i was going to bed on the train (we had sleepers) i realised that i'd forgotten my alarm clock. I was freaking out that i'd not wake up in time to start my shift at 5am. I went to sleep at about 9.30 that night.

I woke up shitting myself, because looking through the window (which was mostly covered by in-built blinds), i thought it was daylight, and i'd slept in. I jumped up, grabbed my uniform and toiletries, ran to the showers, showered, got dressed, applied my makeup, and ran to the other end of the train (15 carriages) to the galley to start setting up.

I then looked at the clock. It was 1.15am. The reason why i thoght it was daylight was because we'd stopped at Gladstone Train Station to refill fuel or something, and the light from the station had been shining in my window. I went back to my room, took off my uniform and tried to go back to sleep without ruining my hair or makeup. :|

My other WTF moment was recent. I was on the bus going into the city one night. A family hopped on at the Gabba (there was an AFL game on that night). There was mum, dad, a son and a daughter...the daughter would have been about 4 years old. She asked her dad where they were hopping off the bus, and he said "Southbank, so we can then jump on the train home". She replied, "oh, but you don't mean 'jump on the train' literally, do you daddy? That's merely an expression for taking a train ride."

She was 4... I'm sure that there are many very intelligent 4 year olds that use words like "literally" in context and come out with things like "that was merely an expression"... but she was the first one i've come across!
 
a fat shirtless man in shorts ran into the middle of a main road, as i was driving by and punched my rear door window.
i had my window open so i assumed he was trying to punch me. crazy fat bastard
 
This is probley one of the most fucked up things I've ever seen while off my face.
It happend last weekend at a train station in Perth, i was coming back from a doof I'd been to the night before in freo. I was still completely mashed and this was at 10am, i'm talking visuals, i could still hear the psy in my head and just general muntedness.
Anyway I'm heading up these esculator stairs happily trippen off my hole when I see a 80+ yr old man with a walking frame get on the other esculator heading down.
The next thing that still leaves me tripped out was I saw every little motion go into play that saw this poor frail man fall down a full flight of esculator stairs.
Just out of the corner of my eye I see his wheel from the walking frame get caught inbetween the stairs and the side of the esculator. Then almost in slow motion I see him slowly fall forward, all the while I'm still going up the stairs just watching this happen out of the corner of my eye.
I turn to see if this is real and before I can do anything I'm watching this old bloke go head first over his walking frame, his head connects with the edge of the steel stairs, he tumbles down each stair,walking frame crashing down behind him, blood pissen out of his head before eventually he gets to the bottom, not moving.
Luckily rail staff were at the bottom of the stairs.
By the time I had got to the top it was all over. Rail staff turned off the esculator.
I just cant get over feeling so helpless about the situation when I SAW everything happen.
I assume he ended up ok, I couldn't hang around to see if he was, I was too munted and had a train to catch, I also nearly caught the wrong train after that, I got on the freo line thinking it was heading to east perth, if i hadn't of looked at the map on the train I would have ended up back in freo, then after i got out i lost my ticket and had to buy another.
That whole morning was just one huge WTF!!!
 
perth people might have an idea as to where i am talking about, but i was driving down the kenwick link heading towards armadale a few weeks ago and stopped at the new sets of lights where the new Roe hwy crosses the link. i glanced out of my window and there is a sign, saying steep slope next to a foot path. on the sign is a pic or a steep slope then a dude in a wheelchair going down the slope.
i instantly thought wtf? and had a good laugh about it. my words do not do it justice, so if ur in perth go and check it out
its bizarre
 
^^^ clearly they're encouraging some kind of racing. someone needs to put a 'first one to the bottom' sign up next to it =D
 
my mixed bball team who have never won a game in a year and a half, just won two games in a row.

wtf?
 
When I had my first acid...and candyflipped we were on our way back from Scarborough in Perth.....nearly home...at about 4am I see this Front End Loader cross the lights...im thinking thats not right....10 seconds later he starts to knock down street signs n trees n shit like that. For about 20 minutes he was knocking everything he could down.

Funny thing was, he looked like he was on acid too.
 
sierra said:
ihaq4weed and i have been together 2 years now, we both turn 23 in a couple of weeks. for his birthday he asked me to get him a full and authentic ninja suit.

why?

he said he would get owned if he walked into a ninjitsu-styke dojo wearing the kung-fu one he asked his dad to get him for his birthday.
Click to expand...

Im sorry, but out of every post i read in this thread this one made me laugh the most. I dont even know why.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top