Very funny.
Adding a couple more:
You either know the promoter, the dj, are on the list, or can get in for free.
You'll go to an event just to see one dj, then leave.
You avoid sweaty hugs like the plague, in fact you avoid sweating all night, if you can help it.
You don't get searched/carded/hassled anymore.
You go to parties thrown by record labels rather than raves thrown by production companies.
Blow replaces e.