MyStiKxAnGeL420
Bluelighter
OMG, whoever created this thread, I love you. There's a lot of stupid shit going on in my life, and right now I can't talk to anyone about it, because I'm not sure who I can and cant' trust. The big thing right now is that me and my best friend are slowly but surely splitting apart. I'm kinda getting out of my partyin stage, but she's getting more into and worse then ever. Her and this one girl who is just beginning to get into her partyin stage, are like a picture perfect example of me and my best friend like a year ago. Inseperable, always havin secrets, always something to talk about. I can't even stand being around them two together. They came down to the club I was at 2nite, and just watching them got me so upset, that I just left. I keep trying to tell myself that this is happening for a reason, and I'm finally growing up and stuff, but it just sucks SO F**KING BAD.... God, I wish the other girl never came into the picture. But that leads on to my 2nd prob. Ok, lets call my best friend J and the other girl K. I've never seen two people have a worse influence on each other. J and K always always always said they'd never do coke and would get sooooo pissed off at me when I did it. Let's just say both of them are pretty much addicted now. K was once this really kewl stoner chic, respected her body, didnt' sleep around, didn't do THAT many drugs. Well, picture the opposite of that. I really could give 2 shits about K, but even though me n J aren't exactly that close anymore, she's still my best friend and I am soooooo friggin worried about her. I tell her and she's just like "well, you have no reason to worry, I can take care of myself" blah blah blah. I don't know what to do anymore. Half of me just wants to get out of this god foresaken city and start a new life, but the other half wants to try and help J. I'm more confused then I've ever been in my entire life. I wish I had someone to talk to, but I just don't. I've been single for the past year and now its really starting to get to me. At first I was all like "Yaa, I'm single! No one to answer to! I can do what I want!", but now it's like "i'm single... no one to hold... no one to tell me they love me, or even that they really care about me... no one to cuddle with or hug or kiss...." I'm so sick of not having anyone. I mean, I'm no Pamela Anderson or anything like that, but I don't think I'm that ugly. Ya, I have some flaws, but so does everyone, and I try my best to make up for those physical flaws, with my personality. But obviously the guys around here aren't to concerned with personality. I keep telling myself that when I do find a guy, I'm gonna be so much more luckier then all my friends who have a new hot b/f each month *who in the end, fucks em and leaves em*, because I'll actually have someone who's true. But how long do I hafta wait ya know? Grr... Wow, if you're still reading this, I applaude you. And hey, if ya got advice or just wanna talk, e-mail or IM me... It's [email protected]. I know, the addy in my sig is wrong. I gotta change that.... Alright, well I feel A LOT better now. I kinda broke down tonite and I really needed to get all of that out! Thanx for listening *or whatever you'd say...reading? i dunno...* 
