• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

Positive The Tapering Supportive/Social Thread

Status
Not open for further replies.
Glad to have you along Uncle_Jacko! It is very nice to have a place where you can talk openly about these problems with others whom understand. It helps so much!

I know what you mean ShroomySatori! We both have had underlying health problems for a very long time and that is just why I don't like the word "addict". It should be more like "survivor". That is how I feel about it. I think most people labeled as "addicts" are just people trying desperately to control health problems so they can keep some kind of a normal life and functioning going.
I don't like all the guilt and shame that others use towards "addicts". None knows what someone else has gone through and what they do go through. I think the most powerful and healing step toward recovery for this entire opiate epidemic is to drop all the blame, shame, and guilt. I don't feel bad about it! I had to do what I had to do. I know all of you guys here have too.

I'm really happy the oils are working so well for you ShroomySatori! :)

Squeaky, I hope you get your prescription real soon and I am praying and pulling for you to get off the loperamide and get your tolerance back down and to feel better and be stable on your prescription.

I'm feeling much better! My tolerance is down. No loperamide. No withdrawal anymore. Stable on my medications. Taking medications as prescribed and have a family member giving me a daily dosage so I don't have to go through that ever again! I just cannot do it. I need my medication to work and I need it everyday. Otherwise, I am moaning, writhing on the ground and the deep bone pain in my left leg is just incredible in how bad it is without any medication.

Feeling very relieved to be stabilized again! It is just so much better this way!

Wishing you all a good day and night and sending love and support!

❤️
 
Thanks for the welcome, Painful One ... I appreciate it. Full disclosure: In some ways, I feel like a fraud. Although I have experienced back pain in my life, I'm not being honest with my doctor right now. I have an MRI that reveals some slight damage; but the truth is, I wasn't in pain last March when I went into see the doctor. I guess, on a spiritual level, one could say I was in pain ... but NOT the physical pain that many of you good people are regularly experiencing. I had around eight years of sobriety, but I stopped going to meetings, I I became lonely / started isolating, and I ended up convincing myself that I would just have a "few days of fun on pills" and then stop. Well, you know how that goes: I went to Urgent Care a few times, and then ended up going to Pain Management. I just want to be upfront and honest with you all ... I need to be 100% truthful while I'm tapering down. The good news: I've been back to 25mgs a day the past three days. I'm going to try to go to 20 or 22.5 next week (I'm thinking 22.5 may be easier, but we'll see). Anyway, I appreciate the support ... I truly do.
 
Honesty and truth are always the best way to go my friend.

I appreciate the truth!

It is good to get to the root of the problem and the only way one can do that is by being one hundred percent honest.
I have learned some things by going back and reading my own words here so it helps in multiple ways to write out what is going on.
Sometimes, it is hard to tell exactly what is going on.

Well done on getting back to the 25 mg a day! That is progress! Excellent job!

❤️
 
Painful one , I've read you loperamide struggle . I'm 60+ days methadone free and am having gastrointestinal issues that the methadone was mostly masking. Since getting off methadone my dr recommends I take loperamide. I've only took 4mg a day and stopped a little over a week ago . After a couple days my runny nose returned and my feet hurt again like when I was in methadone withdrawal. After reading up on lope I discovered it's in the methadone family. The information about how lope doesn't cross the blood brain barrier at low doses is not true.i could take my 4mg daily dose and in an hr I could feel relaxed slightly. A few days I had to take 10mg to stop the runs and would fall asleep after they kicked in . I told my dr and he looked at me like I was crazy .I said you know loperamide is an opioid and he said ,but it doesn't affect the receptors . They definitely do cause Withdrawal at recommended doses . Not bad ones ,but enough to tell its withdrawal. I feel so bad taking loperamide that I'd rather deal with my IBS than be in withdrawals limbo forever. I hope your taper works out well for you . I hope I'm done taking them . If not then I will take lomotil from my dr if I have to.
 
Last edited:
Congratulations hikfromstik for being 60+ days free from methadone! That is fantastic! What a huge accomplishment!
I am very proud of you. From my recent loperamide experience I have an idea of what you went through. Good Lord!
That was so hard!

Yeah, the doctors don't seem to know anything about the loperamide. I was researching the hell out of it trying to figure out what was happening to me. I had only used it for ten days while I was in morphine withdrawal. I did use 48 mg to start and quickly tapered down everyday until I got to 10 mg and then I went back on my morphine prescription and wham! I got hit with the loperamide withdrawal. It was the worst withdrawal I have ever experienced and SO long too!

Even with 75 mg a day of morphine it did not touch that loperamide withdrawal! It was crazy.

Apparently, it is very similar to fentanyl and to methadone. It is actually called "the poor mans methadone".

I would not recommend using loperamide at all except for severe diarrhea and only as instructed on the box. For a very short time!
I read about people using it for IBS at very low doses everyday and they also went through this loperamide withdrawal when they stopped using it. I would be very careful with that stuff.

The withdrawal was like no other! It felt like a bad acid trip mixed with benzodiazepine withdrawal mixed with opiate withdrawal mixed with some kind of special stupid!

I am doing much better now and managed to get myself through it and tapered back down to my prescription.
So all is well.

I hope the last remaining issues from the methadone clear up for you real soon.
You have done something GREAT!
❤️
 
Unclejocko- I have had great success cutting/shaving pills or even crushing them and separating piles of crumbs like s cocaine addict in order to achieve the correct dose for my taper. A medium porcelain bowl with a spoon to crush thr pill and a razor blade to separate into equal piles. Half makes 5 ng. Half of that makes 2.5 mg. Half makes 1.25 mg. And so on.
 
Got my script today. That was 18 days without my oxy.
Feels good to be alive ......
 
2 days on Subs and i'm telling myself "you don't deserve to be happy" "your scum" this is what I took heroin to avoid....
 
Freesolo123- Netflix, headphones with blasting music, skiing, drag racing, football, yoga, sex...... The head game is murder and every minute counts. Do whatever you can to burn every minute and make time pass as quickly as possible. Now is the time to be selfish and do what you want for the next few days. Everyone else will get over it. Dont spend any time in your own head listening to the negative chatter or you will go crazy.
The only thing that matters right now is getting through the next two or three days. Dont let your other responsibilities get in the way.
 
I don't know the answer freesolo 123.
I have no experience with subs. It seems to me that they do help many people. Talk to the others on the suboxone mega thread and see what they have to say. I hope that these thoughts clear up for you and you become comfortable on the sub.
Let us know how it goes. I'm praying for you!

ShroomySatori , what can I do to help you? It sounds like you have really taken a turn for the worse since last we spoke.
I will e-mail you.
*hugs you
 
I never tried subs, but with lope it takes me about 3 days for the self-loathing to go away. I know exactly how you feel. Walking around talking to myself as though I were berating a criminal and trying to make them want to die for all of their bad choices. Except the talking is me to myself in my own head, and it goes on for every waking moment.
FREESOLO123 youre almost there brother. Go blast some music, or go jogging until your hands are numb. Just find a way to block out your own voice and stop thinking about time.
 
I'm tapering kratom right now, trying to at least make a dent in what was a 240+gram a week habit. Like i've posted elsewhere i've tapered to about 180-200grams/week over the past couple weeks but i think i need to take a little time to stabilize on that dose as i'm starting to feel slightly run down all the time.

I just don't want to have the issue of taking extra doses to fill the gaps where i feel like shit, then i lose track of my doses and completely fuck the whole taper.
 
falsifiedhypothesi said:
I'm tapering kratom right now, trying to at least make a dent in what was a 240+gram a week habit. Like i've posted elsewhere i've tapered to about 180-200grams/week over the past couple weeks but i think i need to take a little time to stabilize on that dose as i'm starting to feel slightly run down all the time.

I just don't want to have the issue of taking extra doses to fill the gaps where i feel like shit, then i lose track of my doses and completely fuck the whole taper.
Click to expand...

What helped me is to write down the times I took my medication dosages on my calendar. Every time. That way you don't loose track or take some in the night or something.

Stick to a dosage schedule and keep it stable. No matter what. You are going to feel some interdosage withdrawals for a few hours while dropping your dosage until your body stabilizes on that. It takes a little time for tolerance to drop. You just have to keep yourself distracted, like Squeaky advised.

I would hold at the dosage you are at now for about a week if you are feeling run down all the time.
Take it slow and easy. You will get there.
 
Yeah like everyone should do something like that. For example I passed out at 11:45am today (I am almost certain of it) and woke up at 1. Skipping my noon dose, and I was in rather serious withdrawal since etizolam aka Satan in this manifestation is very short acting in its torment and abuse. I need to start setting alarms at least for now and keeping records because when I first woke up I was very confused about whether or not I took the noon dose (I didn't, confirmed).

Having a real tough time with the etiz withdrawal. Can't really handle 25% taper drops I feel them hardcore the following day and it worsens from there until I'm hysteric. Having a real hard time with keeping my supply going too. It's ruining my life as much as the heroin was and I worry about side effects much more with etizolam. Long term effects. I'm really nervous about those, opiates like heroin don't really do that. And the withdrawal symptoms are so much more dangerous it would probably kill me. Makes me wish I never got off the H at least I'm functional on the stuff plus a much lower dose of benzo. They synergize so I need way more now and I'm just stuck on these drugs. Plus my pain is untreated now and I'm having a serious flare that is affecting my whole entire days and making me depressed about it.

The etizolam withdrawal is a monstrosity though. What the fuck even is that fucking shit. At least heroin withdrawal even when it was at its worst was pretty chill. A torture chamber style experience is to be expected, but I wasn't too anxious to go and sleep with my girlfriend at the time. Who I managed to keep very happy all summer while in acute heroin withdrawal. In etizolam withdrawal I can't even really leave my place. I'm a delusional panic freak scare off any girl.
 
I really don't keep close track of my doses. I only monitor them by using the same scooper for the kratom powder, so i just scoop less and less per scoop every week. I'm gonna try to do smaller doses more frequently then at night take a slightly bigger dose so hopefully i don't wake up in withdrawal.

If i find i use more per week this way i'll stop. I'm not willing to do a quick taper or CT because i need to maintain a stable mood and physical state for my job and current social life.
 
Starting to feel a bit better after a few days for the Bupe to build up in my system went up to 16mg and holding
 
I am starting etizolam withdrawals they are hell.

The stuff is easily ruining my life as much or more than opiates ever did. There is no point continuing to live life on these high doses of them, so it is die or quit. Also, thousands and thousands of dollars have been spent this year alone. It is time to grow up for fucks sake. I am so committed to stopping all this. I can't help but be very nervous about long term effects from benzodiazepines. I have used so many of them and so many different ones. The dose I am on is extreme and etizolam is the most unstable shit to taper with.

To think these drugs helped me at one point in my life. Never, ever saw this coming and I keep saying that over and over.

So far so good. But short acting benzos don't hit too hard until the second day. I am finally ready to begin dealing with this because I have recognized just how serious the side effects while on them are. My memory is all but destroyed. I'm an emotional wreck. They don't even really work anymore, this stuff caught up with me the same way opiates did. I can't say one is worse than the other, but I can say that you'd be hard pressed to find something worse to abuse in the world of drugs than a benzo or an opiate.

Whatever the fuck happened to freedom.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top