Feeling sad about the people I will be leaving behind when I leave for S.E Asia on Monday.
I know the excitement should be so much so that I dont have time to feel any negative emotions about leaving, but its difficult as fuck. Much harder than I expected. If I stay in Aus I might not see my family for 2 years and fuck knows how long my good friends.
I was tidying out a box of memories the other day and I have given this over for my dad to keep. I think he wanted to feel that he was holding something important to me.
Its approaching the last few days now and people are starting to get that bit more emotional when I see them. Its really hard becasue for whatever reason I am the only one who can manage to hold back how I really feel, and I do feel shit about it.
This is a bit odd for me, becasue I remember when I was knocking back pills every weekend I was "I feel this" "I feel that", now I hide it like fuck. Strange, but at least I can tell Bluelight.