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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

The Sad Thread (Anti-Snoo)

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It will come back mate, for sure :) you make good music, that won't go away, all artists/writers have mini writers block moments every now and again, you will get through it and make some quality stuff :)

Oh, and if ever in doubt, add some Moos ;)
 
Yea this always happens, just pisses me off and depresses me when it does.
And no, I will not add moos ;) Can't be ripping off the CAC
 
It's 6 months today since my son died in my arms.
I felt his last heartbeat.
I left a kinder suprise on his grave yesterday but by today the birds had got to it so I took the toy out & left that in its place.
Maybe it was him as a willy wagtail or a robin trying to eat the chocolate. I like to think so.

I miss my wee man sooooo much. We were best friends. I can't wait to be with him again but I know suicide or euthanasia are not options for me so I must be patient & live a fulfilling life (in the same way he did) until my time comes.

My dad made a space in the shed for his quad & his police-car & his excavator but I still keep his small toys on the table in the living room. His cutey wee clothes are still in the kitchen cupboard. I smelt them recently but it made me want to kiss his cheek.

My mind seems to have developed an emotional valve so as not to let too much pain be felt at any one time. Many people say it's hard to believe he is gone. I find it hard to believe he was here in the first place. My son, an angel? A beautiful red curly-haired angel. If I was in charge up there I'd want him back ASAP too!

I'm sad because I miss him but I know there is a bigger picture which is uncomprehendable to me at the moment. When I ask for a sign from him I usually get it & thats really the only thing keeping me going.... Willy wagtails, robins, john deeres, massie fergusons, jets, the moon, lone flowers, hearing 'What a Wonderful World' by Louis Armstrong, rainbows, ride-on lawnmowers.... when I ask & I receive I believe!
 
Just had my Gmail and Amazon accounts hacked (fuck knows how!). Little French cunt changed the name of both accounts, changed them to French, changed my primary email address of my Amazon to his, so I can't get a new password (thank fuck Amazon stripped all my details from it when he started buying up everything). He also had the fucking audacity to change the background of my Gmail account to graffiti spray paint... What a top notch shitstuffer.

Now I'm going to have to do the rounds of changing every password and email address that I think may be the same. Fucking pillock. :X:X:X


Edit
Wow, just read the post above... My problem aint shit, I have half a mind to just delete what I wrote... All the best to you A4B.
 
acid4blood said:
it's 6 months today since my son died in my arms.
I felt his last heartbeat.
I left a kinder suprise on his grave yesterday but by today the birds had got to it so i took the toy out & left that in its place.
Maybe it was him as a willy wagtail or a robin trying to eat the chocolate. I like to think so.

I miss my wee man sooooo much. We were best friends. I can't wait to be with him again but i know suicide or euthanasia are not options for me so i must be patient & live a fulfilling life (in the same way he did) until my time comes.

My dad made a space in the shed for his quad & his police-car & his excavator but i still keep his small toys on the table in the living room. His cutey wee clothes are still in the kitchen cupboard. I smelt them recently but it made me want to kiss his cheek.

My mind seems to have developed an emotional valve so as not to let too much pain be felt at any one time. Many people say it's hard to believe he is gone. I find it hard to believe he was here in the first place. My son, an angel? A beautiful red curly-haired angel. If i was in charge up there i'd want him back asap too!

I'm sad because i miss him but i know there is a bigger picture which is uncomprehendable to me at the moment. When i ask for a sign from him i usually get it & thats really the only thing keeping me going.... Willy wagtails, robins, john deeres, massie fergusons, jets, the moon, lone flowers, hearing 'what a wonderful world' by louis armstrong, rainbows, ride-on lawnmowers.... When i ask & i receive i believe!
Click to expand...
.

:(
 
Acid4Blood said:
I felt his last heartbeat.
I left a kinder suprise on his grave yesterday but by today the birds had got to it so I took the toy out & left that in its place.
Maybe it was him as a willy wagtail or a robin trying to eat the chocolate. I like to think so.
Click to expand...

I don't really know you but I remember hearing the news. I have tears streaming down my face now so I can't begin to imagine your pain. I'm so sorry; you clearly loved him and it must be a huge hole that will always be there. :|

Lost for words.
 
Acid4Blood, your story is heartbreaking. I thought I was hardened to loss having had my brother and my best friend die way before their time but you've got me choked. SG kicked me off, I find crying infectious.

I think it's amazing (and good!) that you wrote that stuff down.

<3
 
My girlfriend having an abortion. Lil mini CbRoXiDe, I would of loved to have had that kid, when she told me I was in tears, then we talked and realised it wasn't the the best option for our situation. I understood that.

But what hurt the most is when we decided she couldn't understand my pain, she felt it wasn't me going through it and I should feel fine. It didn't help that during this period of time a friend OD'd lying on my bed, I remember going to shoot myself up then turning to see her lips blue, face pale. It will haunt me.

Safe to say I was a mess for a good while.
 
Rings too familiar, i'd use to use stupid amounts ofbenzos to come of gear, then get addicted, and then use gear to get of the benzos. Cycle :|.
 
Acid4Blood said:
It's 6 months today since my son died in my arms.
I felt his last heartbeat.
I left a kinder suprise on his grave yesterday but by today the birds had got to it so I took the toy out & left that in its place.
Maybe it was him as a willy wagtail or a robin trying to eat the chocolate. I like to think so.

I miss my wee man sooooo much. We were best friends. I can't wait to be with him again but I know suicide or euthanasia are not options for me so I must be patient & live a fulfilling life (in the same way he did) until my time comes.

My dad made a space in the shed for his quad & his police-car & his excavator but I still keep his small toys on the table in the living room. His cutey wee clothes are still in the kitchen cupboard. I smelt them recently but it made me want to kiss his cheek.

My mind seems to have developed an emotional valve so as not to let too much pain be felt at any one time. Many people say it's hard to believe he is gone. I find it hard to believe he was here in the first place. My son, an angel? A beautiful red curly-haired angel. If I was in charge up there I'd want him back ASAP too!

I'm sad because I miss him but I know there is a bigger picture which is uncomprehendable to me at the moment. When I ask for a sign from him I usually get it & thats really the only thing keeping me going.... Willy wagtails, robins, john deeres, massie fergusons, jets, the moon, lone flowers, hearing 'What a Wonderful World' by Louis Armstrong, rainbows, ride-on lawnmowers.... when I ask & I receive I believe!
Click to expand...

Saddest post i think iv'e read, i truly feel for your loss and i hope time can be a healer although it will never fully take away your pain it will dull it slightly and then when your reunited it will be magical so just gotta keep on keeping on :(
 
CbRoXiDe said:
Rings too familiar, i'd use to use stupid amounts ofbenzos to come of gear, then get addicted, and then use gear to get of the benzos. Cycle :|.
Click to expand...

yeah and this time the only way i think im going to be able to break is it good ol cold turkey, which isnt the best idea with benzos :\
 
Benzo cold turkey ouch mate, i'd really really considor tapering down your dose slowly until your as low as you can possibly go then stop.
 
dont have enough really, and only xanax, which is nearly impossible to taper with. Think im gonna have to go to my docs.
 
Lost my job a while ago as a direct result of my substance abuse. When something goes wrong I drink and drink and drink constantly for about a week. Something pissed me off last week and my 'session' ended yesterday.

All last week I was withdrawing money from the bank to feed my alcoholism. KNOWING that when that money was gone I have no money to pay bills, rent, food, most importantly beer.

Well guess what, I just checked my bank and I have a whole 3 euros to my name. I owe about 300 quid to a phone company. And rent is due on the first. Plus the fact Im in a foreign country on my own. Now I could ask my parents for money, and if I dont come up with something for rent ill have no choice but FUCK SAKE WHY DO I DO THIS?!

Whats worse is I'm kinda laughing about it. Fuck money, cant buy me love man.

Please tell me someone elses life is in worse shit :)
 
ChainsawWilliams said:
Lost my job a while ago as a direct result of my substance abuse. When something goes wrong I drink and drink and drink constantly for about a week. Something pissed me off last week and my 'session' ended yesterday.

All last week I was withdrawing money from the bank to feed my alcoholism. KNOWING that when that money was gone I have no money to pay bills, rent, food, most importantly beer.

Well guess what, I just checked my bank and I have a whole 3 euros to my name. I owe about 300 quid to a phone company. And rent is due on the first. Plus the fact Im in a foreign country on my own. Now I could ask my parents for money, and if I dont come up with something for rent ill have no choice but FUCK SAKE WHY DO I DO THIS?!

Whats worse is I'm kinda laughing about it. Fuck money, cant buy me love man.

Please tell me someone elses life is in worse shit :)
Click to expand...

Man similiar situation with rent money etc, me n the gf spend all ours on london 'skunk' 1.4g for a 20sheet, thats all we can get,trust ive asked around,but tis always pungency but still its making me poor just to feed my ganja habit!
 
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