☮ Social ☮ The PD Cosmic Space-Train: SOCIAL UMPH in Full Spectrum

[cosmic charlie]

christmas is so soon , i think im getting another phone and some computer speakers

it should be sweet

 

[swilow]

^Nice locati0on Charlie :D

 

[cosmic charlie]

thanks swirlow , its a work in progress

 

[coelophysis]

Christmas, LOL. I don't celebrate that stuff, because I don't follow all that noise.

 

[hoopyfrood]

I'm so bored, I don't know what to do with myself. I have at least 24 hours till I need to do something...

it's so tempting, and only takes like 12 hours!

 

[swilow]

^Smoke weed and go for a walk (or at least thats what I just did; well the weed part at least....)

 

[helium-4]

Just got back from doing some christmas (holiday is a better word honestly) shopping. Driving around the Dallas area sucks, especially around holidays... So, for my hard work I bought myself 2 bottles of DXM. I haven't dove deep into the realms of the beast in a while. Hope it turns into a beautiful experience, which seems to be a toss up some times. I've had many trips that are just a little boring, mainly though from ++ doses.

 

[Solipsis]

Recently I've started to drift more and more into the decision to not pick up my college study of chemistry again and finally quit. These last years I've completely lost my motivation and progressed absolutely nothing at all, this year I have a 'sabattical' year to work and take a step back, not even enscribe to the university but I have also been making plans for what to do if and when I want to give it another serious go.
Only... it's feeling like I owe it to something outside of myself to plan this which is of course not real motivation. It just feels like pretense. It's looking dim for that future path of possibility.

I also have decided that I am in need of spiritual counsel, some real soulsearching, deep ego dissolution, harsh psychedelic therapy...
Mushrooms are one option which I am already cultivating again but mostly for fun, what I am really really considering is pharmahuasca. The DMT part is already done, I have made good stuff that, thrown in cola's phosphoric acid, should be excellent so now some rue extraction and I'm golden. 2010 will bring me some shamanic healing.

Love and light bro's !

 

[Delsyd]

 

[swilow]

^Defintely get on the aya/pharmahuaca....With the codeine and benzo addictions I've had ths year (and many years since: codeine no longer thankgod) my recent aya experiences have been very cleansing. I feel like I dropped a lot of shadows and cobwebs and everything is glowing. This year has been an odd one, dropped mammoth weed smoking, successfuly tapered to 40mg's of diazepam a day, got addicted to/quit codeine, began my own magickal practise (using shamanic and thelemic systems) and finally felt like a member of the human race

 

[Solipsis]

Thanks for sharing that, man
If I do proceed with it I want it to happen in a retreated natural surrounding, with a friend or my father watching over me as a guide and preparing with no less than a day of reviewing my situation and meditating.

 

[PepperSocks]

That sounds like it would be a wonderful experience.

I've been contemplating the ayahuasca journey myself; likely when spring rolls around. I have a place in nature I can do it. I'm thinking of just using extracted DMT and extracted Harmine. What MAOI component are you planning for you pharmahuasca?

I know a lot of people use something called moclobemide; I know it's a prescription MAOI but I have absolutely no clue on where to even start with that except going to my doc and saying "I'd like to take ayahuasca; can I get some moclobemide?"

I think extracted harmine would be fine. I have the caapi for that and mimosa for DMT ready to go.

I got really high on codeine/diaz saturday night and I've been constipated ever since; but about 2 hours ago I was quoting something Renton narrated in Trainspotting; "I am no longer constipated."

You know; I guess you could say I'm also in a rut. I'm working and making a bit of money (nothing big) but I feel like I should still be in school advancing myself. I find I just don't have thta kind of motivation to deal with university level work. I go to work, come home, do drugs on the weekends, maybe get some exercise and do something, and go back to work again.

It's not all bad I guess but I feel like I'm not really going anywhere. I guess I'll just try and enjoy myself for the time being.

Anyways I'm on break now. It feels so good. I'm going to do a bunch of drugs and sleep in tomorrow. So far 4g of kava and about to take another 4, smoke a bowl, and go from there.

 

[swilow]

Ha, so I decided to "treat" myself to some codeine today (tsk tsk!)- first tme since I quit which was a month ago, only to be chewed out by the chemist who's been "montorng my use"...Which has been none. I flat out said I'd been dependant and qut and was just using ths stuff once. Thought I'd lose my pills, but no- I told him I extract t in water and made a hasty exit. :D

 

[Solipsis]

Well talking about a rut I am rather in a position somewhere before a big life decision but I feel like it's taking so long to decide this study thing that it's probably better to go and decide either option and make the best of that, more important than trying to make a decision I won't regret. So deciding to decide > what the decision is. Paralysis by (future) guilt projection is a bitch! Paralysis by overthinking is, also.

Very soon I'll have an appointment at a mental health care institute to figure out if I have a disability (let alone some disorder?), I need to know about it because it seems to affect my selfregulation and other things. It's the downside of being freeminded in a way I guess.
Without regulation I also have just about no discipline, reminds me of 'turn on tune in drop out'... After a good while now my hopes should just be for self expression, private intellectual development and supporting myself with work in ICT and getting certificates one by one and learning for those, and cultivate shit at home and do extractions and what not. It's a good life!
Also I've basically lost interest in smoking pot and for a while now my psychedelic intake has really decreased. My health has improved. I'm doing OK!
But I still need to be courageous and decide either thing: be strong and drop out and not be bothered by losing an academic future or be strong and do whatevers necessary to get it!

About the -huasca I actually think I'll be doing anahuasca (mimosa hostilis and peganum harmala). Perhaps there is great quality in Banisteriopsis Caapi and I'll be getting that.

Pharmahuasca would indeed be with something like Moclobemide (Aurorix) which is just available over the internet if I'm not mistaken dude...
But I think it's too expensive.

 

[helium-4]

I've been contemplating testing out oral DMT + MAOi with 45 mg of DMT. My body seems to react negatively to the rush of the smoked DMT, even when I'm in a perfect mood and anxiety free. My muscles start to tense up and spasm. I'm not really trying to have a break through or even a strong +++ experience when my body is freaking out. I really started to realize I have some hardcore underlying anxiety that I can't get rid of even though I've been working real hard this past year on getting rid of it. I'll feel completely comfortably and my mind empty of anxiety, but my body just doesn't let go.

I feel oral DMT will be a better match for me.

I like to have a 8-10 minute minimum on a come up of a psychedelic or dissociative. Insufflated ketamine has the perfect come up time imo. I don't see the need for a quicker come up.

 

[*Love*Lite*]

mwa mwa mwa

 

[swilow]

^Ayahuasca takes a while to come on, and seems to increase almost constantly until dying off...and I think its a lot more anxiogenic then smoked DMT- BUT: that may be helpful. The firt tme I took it (about 2 months ago), I panicked a bit at stages of the trip; particulety when I smoked some DMT on top of it- however, once I "figured" out how to relax into the ayahuasca experience, it was great; essentially, I just lay prone in a nearby park (at nght) and just rolled aound, vomtng when needed, sweating heaps....but surrendering can make you STRONGER!!!

EDT: Hello LoveLite, how U?

 

[helium-4]

Interesting. DMT may not be for me then. I don't want to rush into a break through experience on DMT when I know I have anxiety issues running about. The feeling of my body tensing up and having spasms is quite terrifying and I don't want to deal with that feeling on a psychedelic. I've had a really pronounced muscle spasm experience once after smoking weed, which is interesting since weed is generally really nice to me, and I smoke everyday, and for 15 minutes my lower body was shaking more than the kinkiest dildo you can find hehe. Quite scary when I was going through that. Based on tihs, I don't have a problem never finding the true beauty with DMT. I've found the beauty in finding the perfect drug for yourself, and DMT, no matter how beautiful it may be, may not be for me.

I'd like to see how I would respond to say DPT or if I could ever get my hands on it, DET.

 

[PepperSocks]

mwa mwa mwa

and I think its a lot more anxiogenic then smoked DMT- BUT: that may be helpful.

Those anxiety trips are rough but they are transforming. My mushrooms experiences were rough like that; likely the heaviest pain I have ever felt in my life. I was still shaken up for a long while after the drug wore off but they sure did transform me.

I also have decided that I am in need of spiritual counsel, some real soulsearching, deep ego dissolution, harsh psychedelic therapy...

Sometimes that's the only way. Pure hell while you're experiencing it.

 

[swilow]

This trip report by Xorkoth is really good, especially this bit:

A final stand-out event in the day was perhaps the funniest and strangest of all. We were watching all this talk about the new 'summer blockbuster', 'Snakes on a Plane'. Now, we've thought this movie sounded unimaginably stupid from the beginning. I hypothesized that it's a parody of the Hollywoodized movie, which is basically just special effects. But part of the parody is marketing it as a serious film. I wondered out loud why anyone would want to watch it because it looks so lame and uncreative. Then my phone rang. Guess what I heard when I picked it up:

It was Samuel L. Jackson's voice (the main actor in the film), sounding totally natural and unbroken, saying, basically: 'Yo! Get up off your scrawny behind and get out there and see Snakes on a Plane! Why you ask? it's the greatest movie ever made! It's nonstop action! So get up, stop messing with those computers, quit smoking that waaaacky tobacky, get in your wannabe sports car, and drive down to the theater! If you don't, you'll regret it!' I'm forgetting some of it but unfortunately it was not recorded.

I was absolutely blown away! This was a coincidence of the most amazing kind, a direct response to the question I had just asked by the man himself! Not only that, but the details in it corresponded exactly to me: I'm skinny, I work with computers, I have a low-end sports car, and I certainly smoke the 'wacky tobacky'. After feeling confused for a bit, we ended up laughing at that for hours. I still can't get over how much that made my day. And it also still confuses me to some extent. I would assume a friend of mine went to some website or something and had a recording call me (it was definitely a recording). But if so, how is it that he could have the recording pick out such personal pieces of information and still sound perfectly seamless? I don't know, but it was hilarious!