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The May Getting / Staying Sober Thread vs. April showers bring May flowers

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RedLeader

RedLeader

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तमसोमा ज्योतिर् गमया
You may be a commie, but I am the red leader. "Dear Red Leader" to show respect, "red leader dear" if whispered in my ear.

What do Aussies call a deer missing both its eyes?

NSFW:
no idea?
NSFW:
;)


Last month ended up with five days on kratom and about 10 with weed. Nothing worse.

May goals are nothing but weed. And perhaps DMT if the stars line up. But no kratom, and clearly no opies, benzos, booze or uppers.

Would love to go as frugal as possible too. Cook at home as much as possible. Daily exercise, be nice to people, make out with my crush, daily 30 minute meditation, make out with my crush, spend some time in the sun, touch tongues with my crush, take my daily vitamins, etc.

Good luck to everyone. A lot of you came a long way this past month. Let's help the new people and continue to help each other! <3 :)
 
You beat me to it Sepher! ;) Hehe

April showers bring May flowers? =D

---

We can ALL do this again, guys and gals. We can stay clean, we can get clean.

Friday is my 60 day mark. I'm so proud of myself. There's no greater feeling than being clean and sober you guys. It'll bring you so much more happiness, no matter how hard it is/seems at first. We're all on the same team.

<3
 
I was up earlier than all you 'mericans waiting for you all to catch up RX. I let the April thread run on a little for Alaskans and Hawaians and what have you to make sure everyone was offically into May before I closed it but I was eager to crack on with month three! =D

Congrats on the almost 60 days. Gone fast hasn't it? You should be proud, you're doing great. Like RL said, lots of us have come a long way in a short space of time just doing the one-day-at-a-time baby-steps thing . Big changes can happen real fast so long as you just keep on making the small changes happen. :)
 
I really have come a long way. You guys have been with me every step of this journey too!

It's amazing.
 
I waited 14 hours n just used 2 mg of subutex about an hour ago. Determined to do this detox. Don't feel great but I want to be clean so bad. I'm gonna take another 2 mg in an hour if all is ok n no pwd.I want May to be my month of freedom.
 
How do I get directly into the May thread? I have to go into the April thread in order to get here. The may thread does not show up in "threads you posted in"
 
Usedtobe, If you click into Settings right at the top right of the page does the thread show there? If threads you've posted in aren't showing there you need to change a setting through your control panel. See here. That should subscribe to threads you post in and they'll show up automatically then just by you clicking into Settings when you log in.

A quicker way to subscribe straight to a thread is in the Thread Tools menu found in the blue bar just above the The May Getting / Staying Sober Thread thread title, Subscribe to this thread..

Hope this helps?

Glad you found us anyways Usedtobe. We're all in the same boat, trying again for another month and here to support each other as best we can through the hard times. Good luck. :)
 
may 5 will be 16 months clean. did a bit of work on my forth step, hanging with the girl for a bit and about to head to class. then homegroup tonight. yay!
 
16 months is easy. just gotta take it one day at a time. I just started my days about 16 months ago :P remember: not using is not going to kill you. you might wish death, might be praying for it, but it won't kill you. when I get to that point, I always know tomorrow is a better day and goddamn so far its held true
 
Happy may day comrades!

It's becoming very real to me now I am in the last couple of days of my taper, and I'm nervous. It's for the best though, and I know after the discomfort I'll be grateful to have myself back.
 
Sending everyone good thoughts <3

A new month eh? I am still clean, so I guess that's something.

Still struggling with various physical/mental health issues that are very likely related to being on opioids for so many years, so sometimes it can be hard to stay positive, but I'm just taking it one day at a time (I'm not into AA/NA personally but I do like that part) and trying my best to work on my future while still accepting the present, if that makes sense. I can't sit around doing nothing just waiting/hoping for things to improve, I have to take an active approach.

It's cool that we have this place to share our struggles and our triumphs with others who understand.
 
Hey used2be.. way to go! alright you can do this.. I hope you are feeling pretty good.. give yourself the credit you deserve, big milestone!! the first step to getting out of a whole is to stop digging, way to put that shovel down<3<3.. now you know that this isn't going to be as hard as you thought=D.. Its seems to me that fear is the emotion that the addiction I using against you to manipulate and drive use.. do everything you can to drop that nonsense.. you have absolutely nothing to worry about or fear as long as stay the path you just jumped on. The portion of your brain that is addicted is your subcosciuse or the older portion of the brain, the mamlian brain, or the limbic system A B C.. this part of the brain is what many animals still function on, Limbic system structures are involved in many of our emotions and motivations, particularly those that are related to survival. Such emotions include fear. Basically what we have done is reprogram our DOC use as something this crazy part of the brain now thinks its necessary for survival.. And it will use everything in its power to make us use.. to give you some examples of how manipulative or driven it can be.. It controls thirst (craving for water), hunger (craving for food), sex drive, It controls emotions and if we let them emotions control us as that is what they are designed to do.. emotions are the way the limbic system in the brain gets us (the conscious mind) to do its bidding.. our conscious brain is only a tool that older brain.. ever wonder why every time you decided never to use drugs again but did, the older part of the brain that is really in control did not agree with that conclusion and manipulated us to usa e with its sizable bag of tricks.. once you see through the illusion you cant go back..

You made an amazing leap today.. you are doing great.. there is nothing to be afraid of.. hang in there<3


60 days RX =D

16 months seron=D

and another month for red, seph, swimm .. AND ALL the REST of US<3
 
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Starting to feel like crap...do I take more sub? I took 4 mg...don't want to go over that cuz only using them for 4 days in quick detox. That way I will have about 17 days bf I might get tested n cant have anything in my system. Should I wait till morning to take more subs, or do another 2mg now? WILL NOT DO DOPE EVEN THO I KNOW THE KID NEXT DOOR HAS IT.
 
I think what happened is that you took the Sub a bit too early. It will still work, just the transition will be a bit rougher. 4mg is a lot of buprenorphine, and it's up in the air if more would help or be a waste. How bad do you feel? Like cold turkey bad or just not normal? It can take like 24 hours to adjust to the new drug, so I would try and wait until early morning to dose again, just white knuckle it. Take small doses of Xanax if you feel anxious.

Detox sucks no matter how it is done. All of us have been there, some of us more times than we want to admit. But this can be your last one. Quit this game while you are still young. In a few days you will feel much better. By June you will be helping others detox.
 
rx_prn said:
I really have come a long way. You guys have been with me every step of this journey too!

It's amazing.
Click to expand...

Everyone here is so proud of you, Rx. I remember how hesitant you were to even try at first. Your vulnerability and your courage, not to mention your honesty, have been an inspiration to many. (((<3)))
 
RedLeader said:
I think what happened is that you took the Sub a bit too early. It will still work, just the transition will be a bit rougher. 4mg is a lot of buprenorphine, and it's up in the air if more would help or be a waste. How bad do you feel? Like cold turkey bad or just not normal? It can take like 24 hours to adjust to the new drug, so I would try and wait until early morning to dose again, just white knuckle it. Take small doses of Xanax if you feel anxious.

Detox sucks no matter how it is done. All of us have been there, some of us more times than we want to admit. But this can be your last one. Quit this game while you are still young. In a few days you will feel much better. By June you will be helping others detox.
Click to expand...

IMO this is perfect advice.. remember that beup is just a partial antagonist and you will feel a little rough.. if you didn't go into pretty hard withdraw right after taking it then i think you are doing great.. buep has such an affinity for the opiate receptors it just knocks the morphine right of and as it is only a partial antagonist where the morphine more of a full antagonist you go into withdraw quick, thats why people use it to save ODs.. 4mg is a big dose and I doubt that any more will do any good.. It will just make your taper hurt worse... used to be your doing really good.. since your not going to feel that bad I suggest doing things to keep your mind of the withdrawal symptoms.. plan a full day of light activity and get out and do it.. keep moving, it doesn't make it worse it makes it better.. have you spoke with a dr about clonidine.. if not then put that on the full day list.. i helps many people a great deal, i was one of them.. your doing great.. this will be done soon and you will feel so happy to be clean.. just a litle time of uncomfort to get through to your new life<3

Just got home from my home group NA.. lots of new faces.. with the way the medical comunity hands out these pills its could/going/is an epidemic:( but all is as it should be:)
 
Day 15 off dope. Can't say it's been a good day, but it will do as long as I stay clean. Had to go check into a hospital yesterday, I was having some seriously messed up thoughts. The doctors think it's the lack of sleep (averagine 2-3 hours a day, if I'm lucky). And yesterday I basically 'flipped out'.

My wife called a hospital and we got me checked in. They put me to sleep from 8PM last night to about 10AM this morning. They want me sleeping and if I don't get sleep, they want me checked back in. My wife is going to dole out the ambien here in a bit and it's going to be bed time for bonzo.

Here's to hoping this isn't a trigger for me. And here's to all of you. You are truly some wonderful people. Take care and keep it 'one day at a time'. Love you all...
 
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