The Joke Thread - Try and make it funny, eh?

[maxalfie]

One of my friends got caught shagging rabbits. I don't know how he could stoop so low.

 

[badandwicked]

My girlfriend was moaning about me always doing my flamingo impression. So I put my foot down.

 

[rockstar 69]

Linfield beat Donegal Celtic.. Ireland got humped at the rugby. Hibs got beat by Hearts. And Celtic lost the cup final...... Carlesberg don't do st Patrick's weekend, but if they did.........

 

[parttime crackhead]

Linfield beat Donegal Celtic.. Ireland got humped at the rugby. Hibs got beat by Hearts. And Celtic lost the cup final...... Carlesberg don't do st Patrick's weekend, but if they did.........

but if they did... Fuck the pope.

 

[rockstar 69]

That was my facebook status... then the follow up comment was word for word the same haha!

 

[Acid4Blood]

 

[Acid4Blood]

 

[hx_]

Get your gran to smuggle you some buds!

 

[Acid4Blood]

 

[Acid4Blood]

 

[ponch]

 

[Acid4Blood]

 

[KAYLA2010]

I read shirt the other day. I gotta share

Picture of george bush smiling.

"I screwed you all, but thanks for blaming it on the black guy.

 

[tambourine-man]

Why did the baker smell like shit?

NSFW:

Because he kneaded a poo!

Hahaha! My level of humour.

 

[Albion]

One of me own

That's what a night of EPH and photoshop does to a man.

 

[bogman]

its being a week so

Fabrice Muamba will be wearing a pray for Kenny and Liverpool Tshirt this wend.

he overheard 2 nurses talking about Torres scoring 2 goals and asked how many months was he unconscious for.

 

[rockstar 69]

For April Fool's I'm going to tell my girlfriend I've been having sex behind her back.

Hopefully she'll think I'm joking.

Awkward




Romantic films are known to ruin relationships as they give unrealistic expectations to women about what to expect from men. Porn has the same effect on men. :D

 

[Acid4Blood]

 

[Mugz]

what's black white and red all over?

a half cast slut with thrush


(Is that racist? It was not intended to be so)

 

[Vader]

"Half-caste" is a pretty offensive, outdated term, "mixed race" is more appropriate, but given the context it hardly matters. "Racist" is a vague term- does the joke suggest that you believe black or mixed race people to be inherently inferior to some other race, or that you have a deep-seated hatred of them? No. Is it a joke that you'd be comfortable telling in the presence of a mixed race person? I'd wager not. It's in pretty poor taste, and probably not funny enough to warrant the racism. It's also interesting that you worry about it being a racist joke, but not sexist, when it's at least as misogynistic as it is racist. Put it this way, I'd advise not telling that joke in a situation where you're not anonymous, or at least not around strangers.

Romantic films are known to ruin relationships as they give unrealistic expectations to women about what to expect from men. Porn has the same effect on men.

Porn has the effect of giving you an unrealistic expectation about what to expect from men? Speak for yourself, I've not had that problem.