Ahh 1000 words if you only knew - I can be the nicest guy on earth - too nice, or an obnoxious asshole. I'll recount a story from your neck of the woods, Melbourne, about a stripper i dated for 4/5 months - inc back stage pass pic - it's not 3-FMP, but no doubt that shitty meth of yours was involved - that's the royal your's
Well folks, we hit an all time low last night. And i've been pretty low, but this one was a little bit special. Showgirls bar20 was the arena. My stupid male jealously/pride the catalyst. Bonnie is stripping these days. Doing rather well so she had told me. There is still no word on me getting my $1000 back tho. Despite her boasts of puling that in minimum in a night.
So after a 6 day week and 4 tins of Wild Boar -
www.wildboarbourbon.co... (my weapon of choice these days) I thought fuck it. I'm going down for the 'mega-strip'
www.bar20.com.au/websi...
Now in my minds eye I had visions of sitting quietly at the back, just out of the field of vision. Watching Bonnie and 20 other exotic dancers perform and 'flap their bits' as she had described it to me. Then i'd step out of the shadows, catch her eye, an trigger a tsunmai of shame and comfortableness in her. Now it wasn't a very noble plan. And like most of my plans concocted after a period of heavy drinking it wasn't bullet proof.
The first hurdle was the bouncers. 'Too much to drink mate', walk around the block and come in. Balls. I complied. I wandered through a multi storey car park on king street furtively sipping my last boar missing the mega strip. Now I should of aborted at this stage. The omens were not good. Being pig ignorant and piss drunk however I presented myself 20 minutes later for a second bite at the cherry.
This time I got in. The anxiety added an extra kick to the burboun already swilling around my gut as I ascended the faux marble stair case. Glossy A1 photo's of nudes with big hair and dead eyes seemed to mock me with every step.
I entered the floor and my nostrils were assaulted by by the smell of baby oil and desperation.I made my way over to the bar, ordered an $8 half pint and wa immediately pounced upon by 'Oliva' from croydon. Her accent grated, as did her insistence on me having some 'fun' I was not here for 'fun'. I had much more serious matter to attend to. Not least a broken heart and wounded pride.
It didn't take long to get my bearings. My eyes absorbing and discarding all the carnal offerings to the thumping auto tune of will.i.am. Then, though the smoky glass of the VIP room I seen an unmistakable flash of bleach blonde hair. She was giving a private dance. All the private dances take place in the same area, I thrust $50 into Oliva's sweaty palm and she lead me toward the VIP section. Bonnie clocked me as soon as I walked in. She was completely naked thrusting her fake breasts into an over weight 40somthing city types face.
But in much the same way as I imagine dogs can smell fear she clocked me and instantly knew this was hurting me more than it could ever hurt her. Oliva guided me to a seat and began to to remove her bra. But all I could was Bonnie. She was now bent over thrusting her pussy into this man's face. He was loving it, I was choking back the tears. Oliva began her well choreographed number but could sense my l was in the grip of a panic attack. Those 4 minutes lasted a lifetime. It was horrific. Bonnie finished her whore dance and quickly left the VIP area. I sat shell shocked in disbelief as Oliva ambivalently gyrated through the chours. she had lost her knickers at some stage and I noticed a tattoo of a rose right beside her well groomed box. I looked over to the door and there were 2 monkey men. at the entrance. The track changed, Oliva kissed me on the cheek and headed for the exit. I pulled myself to my feet and was immediately grabbed by the 2 bouncers and thrown out on the street. It has to be one of the lowest points of my life.
Almost tempted not to post this. But hopefully some else will have a worse/better story. I can honestly say I wont be back to a strip bar in a very very very long time.[
*snip*