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stuck on smack need advice im in a bind and dont know what to do

Yeah im just playin around im not really in the position to take on a girlfriend at the present time but i hope to one day settle down hopefully in the next few years wwlould be nice
 
Im feeling very uncomfortable and thinkin alot. im at this place and its really not good.energy i feel here its a little uncofortable but its a place to.hang i guess so i just deal with it. i just find.it weird beig around.people for all day like i have been but i dont understand this feeling right noe its just hard to explain but its a wanna go crawl into a hole feeling? i am feeling just uncokfortable. tommrow night is probly when i will start feeling wd as long as my brain doesnt talk me into gettin more
 
yah!! you are sounding sooo much better, positive and your thoughts keep advancing! fucking awesome... really good movement, nice work sms80. it is rad how things are playing out with this friend you ran into. see... you where truly putting it out there and it came around for you. you have good energy on you side... . you are a GOOD person!

i posted up the the link for locations and times for SMART in chicago, they are all on the n.side... here it is again.

www.smartrecoverychicago.org/meetings-2

if you want some help in setting up a schedule with you methadone dosing let me know. i would start out with a 40mg wafer for the WHOLE first day either take it all at once or do a 20/20. 35-40mg is a very typical first day dose for MMT.

keep jiving, keep smilin, keep moving in the direction you are... .. .
 
I was thinking start out with 80 mg cuz its gonna take a while to get in ny system and yeah its alright that i ran into this guy which yeah i guess its a friend but its like not.a best friend or anything ya know he wants to charge me for everything but its.better than nothing. its a step uo from where i was a couple days ago but i kinda feek uncomfortsble here cuz its not like someone i know really good. i know him a little but you know? so yeah its been a little weird being here all day and sometimes i.sgart to think thy dont want me here but i dont knoe. i tbink i might be crazy...lol seriously i think i need to go.see a psychiatrist orbsonething when this is all over with. i get really depressed sometimes and ibe been procrastinating grttin help with all this but i need to do it so that i dont end up in the sake spot again. you all have helped me alot thabk you and we definateky have alot more talkong to do cuz im gonna start freakin out soon. lol ni am feeling really worried im worried sbout everything im scared nervous as hell and am dreading it hoping that i can get through this.
 
hey.. just saw you pop up.. .. yeah i think it is a very good time to be focusing on YOU.... nice to hear you talking a little shit tho!! very nice.

so... whats up?? is this the place you are planing on switching over and doing the taper at or will you be moving around?? you are most likely feeling nervous and anxious about what is ahead of you. which is total normal, we have all been right with you. are there a bunch of people at the house you are crashing at that you do not know?? total get wanting a peaceful place to get things underway... got to try and keep your thoughts and heart in a positive place... i know that can sound like some bull-shit but you really have been progressing over the past few days. got to keep the train rolling!!
 
The people are just crazy here they always yelling at eachother and stuff and there is one guy that i dont know but itd like i dont know the people really well just a little ya knoow?so its a little awkward being here all the tine and i feel like im a burden at times
 
try to calm down... . focus on your breathing and just the minutes ahead of you right now. maybe take a walk to clear your head a bit and give you some space.

i hear you about your friend and current environment and the clutter it is creating in your head. do you have to stay there to acquire the methadone or can you leave and still get it?? do not wear yourself down by feeling like a burden, you do not need that. two main things you seem to be at this moment dealing with and trying to put together for breaking the D cycle...

your environment/location.. options? and the medication... set?? try to figure these things out.. . we can figure out a good dosing plan for you. hey you are not freaking out in your car!! which is really good, right!
 
I got on opioids really, really bad only for about 4months or so, but my liver was failing from the amount I was taking. I got on Subutex, and from several complications in and outside myself, I was on Buprenorphine for about 4 years. Funny, 4 months traded for 4 years, but I also didn't wait to go into any form of withdrawal to start Buprenorphine. PM me if you want to compare dick sizes with amounts, but I'm not doing that in this forum. I'd say you'd be better off going with Buprenorphine rather than Methadone. All friends I've had with the intention of quitting with Suboxone/Subutex did end up successful, and they still are clean. Everyone I've met that tries Methadone got stuck, and they're all miserable. I feel like Buprenorphine has a more successful track record from the partial agonist effect it has. Taking it the first day will promote a noticeable effect, but after that it's just keeping you from being sick. If you can get through the fact you're not getting high, and you couldn't do so if you even tried, you can face the minor prolonged withdrawal from Buprenorphine. Methadone has a whole different story.

I see this thread getting moved to ODD, with the track that it's going towards.
 
i hear you about the motel room... . if you really feel you need some space maybe you could just get one for a night or two then return to your friends.

hope you are feeling positive today and are ready to start things up!! i know you were talking about taking 80mg to begin and i suggested 40mg- how about meeting in the middle and taking 60mg?? then perhaps the next day move down to 50mg.. we can talk about once we see where you are at with it today.. .

look forward to hearing how you are doing/feeling and what your thoughts are!! keep thinking and working towards this goal, you can totally do it!
 
I'm just wondering how you are figuring that a hotel room to clean up is so expensive? I mean as you are using a gram and a half a day and will no longer be using this, wont that free up plenty of money for a hotel room to kick? It seems like you just may be dragging your feet a little bit.. if this is the case then I would at least use this time to secure the correct medications and to formulate a recovery plan... If nothing changes then nothing changes.. dig?
 
NSA - I haven't read the entire thread so I don't know if they mentioned how they get the money for a gram and a half of H per day, But I've used that much in the past and it was an all day every day hustle to make it happen - Not something I would be capable of doing while dope sick though.
 
neversickanymore said:
Thank You missmeyet<3.. and as I have read SO many well written and genuinely thought out posts from you, your compliment means so much more=D<3.. I love you handle and have for a while.. I have thought of a couple different stories behind it.. if you ever want to share Id love to know..

I am a male miss.. curious as to what you would have guessed though?

Mr. ozz sir I do think we may need to get a little southern something planning.. and thank you sir=D
Click to expand...

We will definitely talk about it one day Neversickanymore! ;)
 
Well im still stuck ive been waiting for this guyvto get this methadone and its seems like he is draggin his feet. im hoping to get it today ....its always something. nothing can ever go smoothly for me ots always gotta be a big hassle and a bunch of bullshit in the way but as of now im still stuck and havent gotten anywhere since last time i posted. ugh this fucking sucks i just want off this shit.
 
I hate to keep trying to promote something as the last thing I want to seem like is pushy.. but please consider checking out the Smart program before you even do the detox. And I would suggest that you talk to people while there and tell them your situation.. there just may be someone there that has a good resource for you. Help often comes to those who help themselves.. I am i no way saying you are not helping yourself, you are and you are doing a great job<3.. but just waiting around for this slacking methadone dealer etc.. will just cause you frustration.. so why not just contact Smart and hit a meeting or two to facilitate and easier transfer into a recovery program and possibly find any resources that may aid you now.. also depending on the price of the methadone wafers you may be able to use that money to see a real dr and get all the medication you are seeking.. and if you find the courage to attend a smart meeting please share your experiences good or bad on >this thread< so others can have the benefit of your experiences. Please remember that addicts have a special place in our heart for addicts and most of what you will find in a smart or NA meeting is love, acceptance, and support..

Your an amazing person and are doing great<3

Your doing great:).. consider throwing your all into breaking and staying free=D
 
I never even heard of a smart meeting ive been in and out if aa and na meetig since i was 12 im 33 now but never heard of a smart neetig
 
Did you check out the links? it is structured way different from the fellowship of NA/AA and can either be used in conjunction with them or on its own just click on the links provided above and check it out and let us know what you think:)
 
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