I'm hoping to just chill with my mate from downstairs and go to bed shortly after midnight. I'm burnt out this year....from work, but the binges just add to that dumpster fire of the soul. Did a pretty heavy binge Christmas Eve-Boxing Day, and now two days later, I still haven't been able to sleep and just started eating normally this morning. Mouth still tastes like homelessness and hate.
Wouldn't mind just starting the new year almost sober for once in my life*.
*Ok, since like 2001.
I could be lying to myself, but the plague and our current restrictions give me the perfect excuse to take it easy.
Maaaaaybe some mushrooms, but like weak, 1g type tea.
I'm genuinely getting sick of being high, on anything, I think. Blaming the liquor but it all falls in together for me. Genuinely always felt best on endorphins from sport and exercise so I'm going to try and get back to that.
Back to fucking tea and kombucha, and kefir and non-alcoholic cocktails for the new year and keeping it going til at least my birthday.
And leavin the psychedelics for music festivals and weddings that will hopefully happen next year.
I have five pints I have to get rid of though....they're taking too much space in my fridge and I'm not staring at that shit every time I open my fridge for the next 3 months.
Need to stop smoking again as well, and I only smoke when I drink (8 months later still not getting any cravings when not drinking), so not drinking will be great in more ways than one.
Getting kind of sick of myself....and that's a shit way to start a new year.