N.A. meetings and judgmental people

[Legerity]

^^That's true. Sometimes you have to look for what other options are available. You can't necessarily easily give everything up and expect things to be great just like that...we have reasons for why we do what we do, and it often takes effort to deal with those issues.

If you were miserable and turned to drugs, then give up drugs, you won't necessarily be the happiest person in the world. You may very well just go back to your baseline misery. It takes work to change your way of thinking.

What's the root of the issue, what makes you use drugs in the first place? That's what really matters.

 

[Lolie]

^^^

Being miserable takes just as much energy as change does - we often forget that.

 

[Legerity]

^^^

Being miserable takes just as much energy as change does - we often forget that.

Wise words

 

[jake99]

Depression makes me miserable , as well as the fact that i have a messed up family , dont know where im goin in life as far as a career, dont wanna be a addict, dont have a lot of friends, dont have a girl ......................but anyway i know im just complaining but these are some reasons i turn to drugs

 

[OverDone]

some of those things you mentioned can be distractions from ourselves, man. Put the focus back on you, man and all that outside stuff will eventually come to you once you get jake back in order.

To be honest... the girl thing... you're not ready for that yet, man. You gotta get back on-point before even considering a relationship with someone. You don't have anything to offer anyone right now. Again, get back on point and the girl will come

 

[Legerity]

some of those things you mentioned can be distractions from ourselves, man. Put the focus back on you, man and all that outside stuff will eventually come to you once you get jake back in order.

To be honest... the girl thing... you're not ready for that yet, man. You gotta get back on-point before even considering a relationship with someone. You don't have anything to offer anyone right now. Again, get back on point and the girl will come

I had a relationship during my heaviest drug use and it eventually led to using even more and deciding going to rehab. I'm convinced that it would have taken me much longer to fix my life up if I hadn't met that girl experienced that relationship.

I'm not a big fan of using relationships to help "fix" yourself or changing yourself purely for somebody else, but we can learn something from everybody no matter what current level we are at. I feel that our value is something inherent in us, not dependent on our external circumstances. Is somebody is able to see that in us then it can be very healing no matter how bad off we are.

 

[Georgie25]

I know lots of rehabs prohibit relationships in the beginning phases of recovery because instead of a person using a drug to feel good they will use the relationship to feel good, and it's just not healthy and doesn't help the recovery one bit .

 

[OverDone]

I had a relationship during my heaviest drug use and it eventually led to using even more and deciding going to rehab. I'm convinced that it would have taken me much longer to fix my life up if I hadn't met that girl experienced that relationship.

I'm not a big fan of using relationships to help "fix" yourself or changing yourself purely for somebody else, but we can learn something from everybody no matter what current level we are at. I feel that our value is something inherent in us, not dependent on our external circumstances. Is somebody is able to see that in us then it can be very healing no matter how bad off we are.

I understand this and have experienced it with a girl that i was involved with when i was clean and then got back together when i was hiding my using. It caused her an enormous amount of pain and TBH, it was unfair to her

I do get what you mean though. I'm thinking that it is more negative than positive overall, though.

 

[Legerity]

I understand your point too...it can often put a lot of pressure on one person to deal with another person's issues. My situation was a bit different, we were both using and it just turned into one big binge.

But I would agree that most heavy drug users that get into a relationship will tend to use the relationship as a drug too, to fill a void and ignore their underlying issues. I tend to think that this is the case with most people actually, whether they are drug users or not.

 

[OverDone]

i'm in a exclusive physical relationship now with that same girl so I agree, she is a different kind of quick fix now.

i never realized this before but it seems that when I'm in a relationship, it forces me to do work on myself and brings light to many of my flaws and good points. Being so used to isolating and being emotionally distant it can cause discomfort due to the unfamiliarity of something new

 

[Legerity]

It's so true...I've just been dating somebody for a month and a half or so (which came to an end although I will attempt to fix that ) and it forced me to look at so many of my unresolved issues that I really feel like a different person as a result of it. Every time I meet somebody my anxiety skyrockets because my issues become so obvious, so I try to just look at them all as a learning experience now, whether the relationships looks like a "success" or not.

I tend to keep to myself too...so much easier to avoid dealing with things that way

 

[jake99]

not to change subject but i talked to my boy chris today who kicked dope and benzos cold turkey and now is real into AA and i told him how i plan on getting off the meth clinic and how i got 5 subs so i can wean off and get clean and he is telling me that i am going to die from benzos and opiates, that the only way i will get clean is a "spiritual solution" and that the only people who get clean kick cold turkey how he did it..............He also started quoting to me right from the big book that i am "constitutionally incapable of being honest with myself" Talk about letting a program think for you.............AA just turned him into a dick. Im so sick of trying to get support from ppl who are in recovery and them just telling me how i am wrong about everything and im gonna die

 

[OverDone]

i gotta agree with you, jake. Dude sounds like a dick who is hiding behind written words and using those words in a sort of religious zeal. The program isn't religious but this guy sure makes it seem very similar to one.

There are real folks in recovery who don't fuck around like that. Please don't let the bad ones ruin it for you.

 

[jake99]

And he thinks he still is going to finish law school after he has a gun charge pending lol
so whatcha guys think ? I got 5 subs,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Get off the clinic wait the 2 or 3 days and kick with the subs ?

 

[silvercrimson]

i was in an outpatient program in 2003, and one of the requirements to graduate was having to do the meetings. personally from my own expierence, all the people there were total fucking assholes, and not only that, half of them were fucking lit most of the time getting up every fucking 5 seconds to get coffee or do someting. i also found that most of these people had an addiction to going from meeting to meeting to meeting, now that is just a fucking heavy trip in itself, i mean my god how many fucking meetings can one do in a day, fuck. you know if the meetings do help in any way thats great, but i dont think that meetings are for everyone, they sure werent for me. i ran into quite a few people that i knew in the meetings, they were all clean "working thier program, doing the steps" BUT they were fucking assholes once they were sober. i can honestly say that theres just some people who should just stay high, because there fun to be around, and its great, but my god get them sober there the BIGGEST fucking judgemental aassholes ever!!!

 

[jake99]

Lol yup that guy who i just told that guy who i was talkin about that i was tryin to get into a detox so he named a place to go and since his friend was a nurse there i asked him if he could find out abuot it for me.............he said "NO , DO IT OR DONT " i was like wow real nice...........then my friend who is clean and NOT in Aa or Na said she would let me kick at her house and be there to help me .................goes to show who is the real friends

 

[Lolie]

Lol yup that guy who i just told that guy who i was talkin about that i was tryin to get into a detox so he named a place to go and since his friend was a nurse there i asked him if he could find out abuot it for me.............he said "NO , DO IT OR DONT " i was like wow real nice...........then my friend who is clean and NOT in Aa or Na said she would let me kick at her house and be there to help me .................goes to show who is the real friends

Some detoxes/rehabs operate on the premise that you're not ready to get clean until you're willing to do "whatever it takes" yourself, including seeking out and getting into treatment. That may well be the philosophy of the facility at which that particular nurse works.

 

[Khadijah]

And he thinks he still is going to finish law school after he has a gun charge pending lol
so whatcha guys think ? I got 5 subs,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Get off the clinic wait the 2 or 3 days and kick with the subs ?

jake i thought you already realized that you shouldnt do that? Didnt you say just the other day that you realized thats a kinda foolish plan and you know it aint gonna work?

Maybe this post is from before the time that you got to the point where u figured out that the 5-sub detox plan is a bad idea, if thats the deal my bad.

But i dont think i need to tell you that A-kicking the clinic that fast is a awful terrible idea and B-you gonna need a lot more than 5 days to suddenly magically be clean and actually stay that way.

the idea that you can just take subs for 5 days and everything will be ok is just straight up some wishful-ass fantasy thinking. You know this yo.

and "chris" sounds like a fuckin judgemental douchebag , fuck him yo. he aint gonna be the one to help you.

It dont matter whether you get clean thru kickin CT or methadone or sub or tapering off your DOC or wtfever. Everybody can have success in all these different ways everybodys different and to act like you can only succeed if you get off dope in one particular way is just stupid as hell. you dont need me to tell you that tho. stay away from this guy if you want to get your shit together. It sounds like he got a extremely overbearing personality and will only give you trouble. you are tryna go the right way now and regardless of wat program drones like him say, you ARE doing the right thing by tryin to get clean in your own way. His opinions on it will only confuse you and get you even more fucked up cuz i know you mad vulnerable and easy to influence when you get confused you tend to take shit to heart and peoples opinions really seem to sway you alot. So you might be doing good and thinkin you on the right path then talk to him and he says some dumb ass shit like you posted about and then you get all fucked up and start wondering if maybe hes right and etc...you dont need that. You gotta stay strong on the path you on and listenin to folks like that who aint even tryna help you and are just tryna push their beliefs on you is just gonna make it harder.

 

[OverDone]

jake, in Pennsylvania I was able to get into rehab for free. Perhaps there is a similar thing available in the state that you live in?

Here is how the process works in PA (I'm leaving out the name of the facility but feel free to PM me for it if you would like more info):

in Philly there is a company/service that gets people into rehab who don't have money/insurance.

I called them and they told me to do the following:

1- Go to the local Social Security Office
2- Fill out forms for Medical Assistance (you can also apply for food stamps and housing assistance)
3- Indicate on the form and to the person at the desk that you require a rejection letter and that you will wait for it
4- A case worker reviews your info and will provide the rejection letter that day or they can mail it to you
5- Take the rejection letter to the company/service that places folks into a facility and they do a one-on-one assessment
6- They then place you in a facility

The company/service can get you into a facility the next day.

Basically, you get rejected by the state for assistance and then the county steps in and funds your treatment.

PM me if you would like more info

 

[jake99]

Lacey
i was just thinking of going to a detox after classes end, honestly id like to be totally clean........i havent made any decision for sure yet............but i had a friend offer me to stay with her if i did decide to kick and couldnt get in to a detox. Its not that i think staying on the clinic is bad , its just that it is not keeping me clean and im wondering if i need to be off all opiates instead of being on maintenance. Because i need to stop messin with coke/dope and that is one reason i feel if i cant do that while on the clinic , if i get away and give myself a little time to get my system clean , maybe then id be able to start to feel better and get my life in order.............Lacey i hope that whatever decision i make that you dont look down on me for it............If the clinic was working and i was staying clean then i def wouldnt see a reason not to stay on , and im not blaming the clinic , i just am thinkin bein on any opiates for me could possible be triggering me to want to keep getting high . i dont know , am i going crazy again ?
as far as the 5 subs go, dont they detox you in rehabs with about that many subs ? that is only reason i thought it is possible..........i remember when i went to seabrook they have me subs about a week or so and the kick wasnt bad at all..................
of course theres PAWS but they are gonna be there when you get off methadone too..........probably worse longer u stay on , i would assume..............?????????