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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Jobseeker's Allowance Megathread ver. The Jeremy Kyle Fan Club

To be fair, it was a toss up between getting a job and picking up dogshit all day, I'd likely start filling in some application forms.
 
the one i heard that was in operation now is working in a gardencentre where you get treat like shit for the equivalent of £1.80 an hour. then if you leave because of being treat like shit you can lose your benefit.

That does sound grim but I suppose the logic is if they make it comfortable/cushy then it aint gonna make people want to get a proper job and so is pointless.
 
the problem with it is that it's ran through a private company and the agents have targets etc rather than genuinely trying to help people into work. one of them bought my mate (who has a few art/graphic design qualifications) a £500 tshirt printer and stuff and made him sign off because he was now a business :|
 
That does sound grim but I suppose the logic is if they make it comfortable/cushy then it aint gonna make people want to get a proper job and so is pointless.

That also assumes that it is possible to find work. In some areas (especially rural areas like where I am) that just isn't the case. There are no jobs here whether you want one or not.
 
the problem with it is that it's ran through a private company and the agents have targets etc rather than genuinely trying to help people into work. one of them bought my mate (who has a few art/graphic design qualifications) a £500 tshirt printer and stuff and made him sign off because he was now a business :|


Aahh, now that puts a different slant on it. As soon I hear the words private company, agents and targets it starts to sound like a fuck up.

Whilst I'm 100% for schemes for the unemployed in the way of doing community work for their benefits and ultimately, helping them back into full time employment, when companies start earning off the back of it and having their fucking "targets" to hit then it's only going to end up one way - fucked.

And that's no good for the taxpayer and certainly not for people on the dole looking to get working again.
 
To be fair, it was a toss up between getting a job and picking up dogshit all day, I'd likely start filling in some application forms.
i think that's the general idea mate. ;)

this fucking tory government, the country's gone to shit already.
 
That also assumes that it is possible to find work. In some areas (especially rural areas like where I am) that just isn't the case. There are no jobs here whether you want one or not.

Yea, fair point Sham. I grew up on council estates and have no real idea of life in the country and the problems associated with it - lack of employment, lack of public transport, unsubsidised fuel etc.

It needs someone with a better understanding of rural life than me to address the problem of lack of work in these places but I can certainly see how it's a very real issue.
 
I also grew up on council estates and have always lived in towns/cities until the last few years. Could always get a (crappy) job at the drop of a hat in those kinda places but out here in the sticks it's a whole other world. There are literally no jobs other than stacking shelves at the Co-Op and they don't come up often and are hotly contested cos it's that or nowt :\
 
I also grew up on council estates and have always lived in towns/cities until the last few years. Could always get a (crappy) job at the drop of a hat in those kinda places but out here in the sticks it's a whole other world. There are literally no jobs other than stacking shelves at the Co-Op and they don't come up often and are hotly contested cos it's that or nowt :\

And lack of quality minge too, I bet it's slim pickings out in the boonies =D
 
Starting to think that SNPs idea of an independent Scotland might not be so bad afterall. :\

Sounds like Clegg and Cameron have something nasty up their sleeves for doleyscum - they appear to want you to work a 40 hour week for your £64. Presumably picking up dogshit and what have you.

Is there any more info on this? Be interesting to know whether they expect everyone signing on or just the long term unemployed to work for their dole.

Surely if they can find all these tasks for dolescummers to do then they could actually just create a whole load of new jobs and pay people a proper wage to pick up dogshit instead of insulting them and giving them £1.80 an hour to be treated like a slave.
 
That's not such a bad idea actually, Spadey. There's loads of jobs that could be created along similar lines - making the local area a more pleasant place to live by paying folk to do the stuff that the council spends millions on bringing in private companies who either do a shit job or do shit all. Actually, aren't the council already responsible for dog shit clearing duties?
 
It's pretty insulting to tell someone they're gonna pick up dogshit (or do anything for that matter) for 35hrs a week just to get £65 dole. Make a proper job out of it and pay them at least the minimum wage and it's not such a bad thing.
 
It's pretty insulting to tell someone they're gonna pick up dogshit (or do anything for that matter) for 35hrs a week just to get £65 dole. Make a proper job out of it and pay them at least the minimum wage and it's not such a bad thing.

In all honesty mate I'm not sure they make Dolescum pick up dogshit all week. In fact the only schemes closee to this I've seen in Manchester recently have been young offenders being made to cut back overgrowth on wasteground & tidy up flowerbeds in the park etc. They make them wear high viz jackets with "COMMUNITY PAYBACK" on them too.

I take your point that Dolescum shouldn't be publicly humiliated or turned into slaves but on the other hand, the Benefits Agency aren't going to turn it into a full time, reasonably paid job as it doesn't have the budget to be paying salaries and it's not designed to be an employer.

They're just after making life uncomfortable enough that it makes you get a job and if making you do XYZ for your benefits is the way to do that, that's what they're going to do I suppose.

As I said earlier, I'm fine with it too as long as it's done in a socially & morally acceptable way (ie not picking up dogshit)

If you're disabled, too ill to work, old & alone etc - then I'm all for the state looking after you as long as it's needed, regardless of cost.

But, if you're a fit healthy person who can work (in an area where there is work) then I'm all for not making benefits attractive enough to consider as a long term option.
 
I take your point that Dolescum shouldn't be publicly humiliated or turned into slaves but on the other hand, the Benefits Agency aren't going to turn it into a full time, reasonably paid job as it doesn't have the budget to be paying salaries and it's not designed to be an employer.

They're just after making life uncomfortable enough that it makes you get a job and if making you do XYZ for your benefits is the way to do that, that's what they're going to do I suppose.

As I said earlier, I'm fine with it too as long as it's done in a socially & morally acceptable way (ie not picking up dogshit)

I'm not suggesting the benefits agency pay people a full time wage for JSA but if there are all these 'tasks' for dolescum to do that aren't getting done now then why does the Government not turn them into full time, proper jobs and pay people proper wages for them. People would no longer be on benifits they'd be employed.

It solves the problem of there being so many unemployed and on benefits. The jobs wouldn't require any skill so anyone could do them, perfect for all these folk who are long term unemployed and don't really have much to offer employers.

Maybe it wouldn't work but it's a bit of a joke that anyone has to work full time for their £65 a week. Pisstake.
 
Isn't this kind of what happened in Greece? A very, very generous public sector (with ridiculous payouts like bonuses for turning up to work on time) is part of the reason the economy was mired in debt - and when Germany demanded they get rid of these perks it led to riots on the streets.

I personally think the national debt of Greece could be halved if they bought plastic plates instead of ceramic.
 
Applying for this job... ;)

TAROT CARD CONSULTANT
Vacancy from
Job No:ECC/21891
Wage£6 TO £12 PER HOUR
Hours16-35 PER HOUR, 5 OVER 7 DAYS, BETWEEN 8AM-8AM
Location NATIONWIDE M30
Duration Permanent
Date posted 20 January 2010
Pension detailsNo details held

Description
Experienced professional tarot consultant required. Good communication skills and the ability to work well under pressure, and be reliable. Essential skills are the ability to read and interpret the cards, and convey this to the client. Duties involve taking incoming calls from our busy switchboard in Manchester. We are open 24/7 so hours can be flexible. .
How to apply
You can apply for this job by telephoning 0161 7073189 and asking for Ella Brown.
Employer
Find Your Destiny


Seriously what the fuck? Wonder what the job centre would say tomorrow if I told them I'd applied. :D
 
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