Sex I prefer masturbation over sex

[Neuroprotection]

I don't think she followed you around because she felt sorry for you. You mentioned earlier that several people asked you how you could stand her, so maybe she didn't have many other people to hang out with. But she wouldn't have done it if she didn't like you in the first place. In my experience, most very loud and outgoing people prefer the company of quieter people (more than vice versa).

I really hope you find a person with whom you can at least share your fantasies, even if that person won't be able/willing to fulfill them.

Thank you for that. That makes me feel much better. in my culture, family plays a big role in helping find a spouse. I think the key is, for me to be more honest with my family bye letting them know what type of girls I’m interested in or at least be clear when I find a potential bride Who has these characteristics.
I think my family has the idea that The best girl for me would be someone who is shy and quiet when in reality that would be a nightmare for me.

 

[paltatomate]

I think my family has the idea that The best girl for me would be someone who is shy and quiet when in reality that would be a nightmare for me.

Then you should definitely let your family know your preferences. You don't have to go into details, just that "shy girl" isn't what you want.

 

[fairnymph]

Yes, I think you’re right. whilst foot fetishes are actually quite common, spitting in the face is not so much. I know I’ve mentioned this a lot before, but I’ve noticed most people into women’s feet prefer them to be wearing some sort of footwear, like socks or shoes rather than clean, bare feet.
I think it’s also the type of girls I’m into that shocks people. I really like those that are loud, outgoing energetic and spontaneous. The girl I was friends with at college and who’s feet and spit I fantasise about day and night, was this type of girl and many people asked how I could stand her for more than a minute.

That makes perfect sense. Classic opposites attract. You’re shy and introverted, so you want an assertive extroverted girl. I myself am one of those girls and I love introverted men. We get along great. But it’s very important for men to be confident. Just work on that self-esteem, and I think you’ll able to find a compatible girl who is adventurous sexually.

I don’t find feet sexy, but I’ve been with a man who was into them, and I was happy to indulge him. And most girls love foot rubs! I certainly do

Your preference for clean bare feet is a good thing, imo. It suggests to me that you might not need, or even really want, humiliation to get your rock off.

 

[fairnymph]

Sorry, was that question for me? I can’t tell us there is no quote and I am blind and my screen reader doesn’t tell me everything.
However, no, my mother has not shown, these tendencies, and has mostly fortunately been very kind and loving.

What is your father like? What is the relationship between your parents like?

 

[fairnymph]

I don't think she followed you around because she felt sorry for you. You mentioned earlier that several people asked you how you could stand her, so maybe she didn't have many other people to hang out with. But she wouldn't have done it if she didn't like you in the first place. In my experience, most very loud and outgoing people prefer the company of quieter people (more than vice versa).

I really hope you find a person with whom you can at least share your fantasies, even if that person won't be able/willing to fulfill them.

I agree with this assessment. I don’t think she was just being nice Out of pity.

 

[fairnymph]

Thank you for that. That makes me feel much better. in my culture, family plays a big role in helping find a spouse. I think the key is, for me to be more honest with my family bye letting them know what type of girls I’m interested in or at least be clear when I find a potential bride Who has these characteristics.
I think my family has the idea that The best girl for me would be someone who is shy and quiet when in reality that would be a nightmare for me.

100% agree with lecroute - be honest with your family! There’s nothing wrong about wanting that type of girl, and it’s great to have a balance of traits within a relationship, where you complement each other.

 

[Neuroprotection]

What is your father like? What is the relationship between your parents like?

I’ve always had a great relationship with both my parents. my father is very kind and loving as well and holds both modern and traditional values. however, I do think both my parents are emotionally exhausted from running a family of eight kids, as well as new grandkids. that’s just one of many reasons I don’t want kids myself.
Although my parents don’t really talk about this in explicit terms, I think they are firm believers that men should be dominant in the sexual part of the relationship. that doesn’t mean that the man controls the woman but rather, that its quite embarrassing for a woman to dominate a man.
Strangely, some of my family members have the opinion that is dominated by a woman, it’s better if the woman is much older. One day, my brother watched a TV program about fetish and BDSM where men were being trampled and humiliated by women Who were generally much older, and also more masculine. I made a jokey remark to my brother by saying something like “wouldn’t it be much better if it was a 19/20 year old girl doing this to the man “. my brother was shocked and said no, that would be too degrading and how can you take that as a man.

 

[Neuroprotection]

That makes perfect sense. Classic opposites attract. You’re shy and introverted, so you want an assertive extroverted girl. I myself am one of those girls and I love introverted men. We get along great. But it’s very important for men to be confident. Just work on that self-esteem, and I think you’ll able to find a compatible girl who is adventurous sexually.

I don’t find feet sexy, but I’ve been with a man who was into them, and I was happy to indulge him. And most girls love foot rubs! I certainly do

Your preference for clean bare feet is a good thing, imo. It suggests to me that you might not need, or even really want, humiliation to get your rock off.

‏

Thank you for that. The idea that opposites attract definitely applies to me when it comes to girls.
I do know of some cases where introverted guys only want introverted girls. One of my own brothers is like this, he’s apparently very good looking and always gets attention from girls and he loves it when he does. problem is, whilst it feeds his ego, he doesn’t like the extroverted girls who gives him the attention he craves. I mean, he does like them in terms of beauty but he always obsesses over and seeks out the shy quiet girls. I think he does have some serious self-confidence issues that are much worse than mine.
He’s normally an amazing person to be around, but once he’s in love with a shy introvert girl, he changes completely into an isolated, secretive, grumpy and very agitated individual who gets annoyed at literally anything.

 

[fairnymph]

I’ve always had a great relationship with both my parents. my father is very kind and loving as well and holds both modern and traditional values. however, I do think both my parents are emotionally exhausted from running a family of eight kids, as well as new grandkids. that’s just one of many reasons I don’t want kids myself.
Although my parents don’t really talk about this in explicit terms, I think they are firm believers that men should be dominant in the sexual part of the relationship. that doesn’t mean that the man controls the woman but rather, that its quite embarrassing for a woman to dominate a man.
Strangely, some of my family members have the opinion that is dominated by a woman, it’s better if the woman is much older. One day, my brother watched a TV program about fetish and BDSM where men were being trampled and humiliated by women Who were generally much older, and also more masculine. I made a jokey remark to my brother by saying something like “wouldn’t it be much better if it was a 19/20 year old girl doing this to the man “. my brother was shocked and said no, that would be too degrading and how can you take that as a man.

That’s good, & I agree completely with your family!

 

[fairnymph]

‏

Thank you for that. The idea that opposites attract definitely applies to me when it comes to girls.
I do know of some cases where introverted guys only want introverted girls. One of my own brothers is like this, he’s apparently very good looking and always gets attention from girls and he loves it when he does. problem is, whilst it feeds his ego, he doesn’t like the extroverted girls who gives him the attention he craves. I mean, he does like them in terms of beauty but he always obsesses over and seeks out the shy quiet girls. I think he does have some serious self-confidence issues that are much worse than mine.
He’s normally an amazing person to be around, but once he’s in love with a shy introvert girl, he changes completely into an isolated, secretive, grumpy and very agitated individual who gets annoyed at literally anything.

Yeah those introvert/introvert pairings are often the worst. 2 extroverts CAN get along but often they compete/clash. Whereas 2 introverts are stagnant, often hermits too.

 

[Neuroprotection]

That’s good, & I agree completely with your family!

Just to clarify, do you mean you agree with them in terms of men taking a leading role in the relationship? I assume that’s what you meant, but sorry if I misunderstood

 

[fairnymph]

Just to clarify, do you mean you agree with them in terms of men taking a leading role in the relationship? I assume that’s what you meant, but sorry if I misunderstood

Yes, and also that if a man is dominated by a woman, it’s less shameful if she’s older.

 

[Neuroprotection]

Yes, and also that if a man is dominated by a woman, it’s less shameful of she’s older.

Oh okay that makes sense. even though personally i’d rather be under the bare feet and spit of a young woman I totally understand why people may see it as more shameful. well, that’s after spending some time, seriously thinking about it. maybe I’m going way too deep into this but I guess an older woman subconsciously demands respect and can be seen to have more authority. therefore, getting dominated by them may not be viewed as terribly shameful.
On the other hand, getting dominated by a very young woman e.g. between ages, 19 and early 20s is kind of like a super strict authority figure such as a teacher being suddenly dominated and severely humiliated by a bunch of youngsters.
Sorry for any stupid analogies and rambling posts, I just wanted to share my thinking process.
I also want to thank you as you really encouraged me to deeply look into myself and my fantasies. even though my fantasies may never change, at least I have a better understanding of where they may have come from so thank you again for that.

 

[fairnymph]

Oh okay that makes sense. even though personally i’d rather be under the bare feet and spit of a young woman I totally understand why people may see it as more shameful. well, that’s after spending some time, seriously thinking about it. maybe I’m going way too deep into this but I guess an older woman subconsciously demands respect and can be seen to have more authority. therefore, getting dominated by them may not be viewed as terribly shameful.
On the other hand, getting dominated by a very young woman e.g. between ages, 19 and early 20s is kind of like a super strict authority figure such as a teacher being suddenly dominated and severely humiliated by a bunch of youngsters.
Sorry for any stupid analogies and rambling posts, I just wanted to share my thinking process.
I also want to thank you as you really encouraged me to deeply look into myself and my fantasies. even though my fantasies may never change, at least I have a better understanding of where they may have come from so thank you again for that.

You don’t lack mental prowess/agility.

It’s understandable that an inexperienced young man might be seduced by older, experienced, dominating woman. Whereas a young woman dominating an older man is essentially unnatural.

We are all have issues, but understanding them, regardless of whether we want to & are capable of change, is always better and ignorance and self-delusion. Since it sounds like you haven’t experienced any serious trauma, I think it’s likely your fantasies are more quirky rather than symptoms of mental illness that cannot be treated. Some quirkiness is good, too - makes us interesting.

 

[swimmingbird421]

You are misinformed, as any basic Internet search will reveal. The problem is that for over a century now, the wrong type of people have been having most of the children, while the right type of people have been having ever fewer.

The West = all white people of European descent.

Yea in my neck of these "woods"
Immigrants, mostly latino, have taken over. Ridiculously expensive mexican grocery stores, youll need a ebt card to afford a good meal. Worst part is they are so greedy and aggressive and they all seem to hate white people...for no reason.. And a good percentage of the homeless are disheveled Mexican men. Spanish is spoken so much that I don't feel at home I guess I feel like im in mexico. I hope this doesn't seem racist, it's just another thing im dealing with in the good Ole usa .. even the African Americans are ticked off by the Mexicans ruining their country and now coming over here and destroying this great land.

 

[TheGyattDamnRizzler]

Is it uncommon to prefer masturbation over sex? I have an extensive masturbation history, and I prefer it over having sex with my girlfriend. Sex doesn't really feel THAT good, and it's hard for me to cum. Just wondering if others feel the same ...

You could be addicted to pornography. I'm sure your not jerking off to nothing. Make something memorable happen with your girlfriend that like turns you on. Or leave her and start paying for porn subscriptions I guess there's no shame.

 

[Spaced]

Here's the complete truth my man you just have to abstain from jerking off and porn for maximum 3 months

so your mind can associate sex with orgasms and not associate them with jerking off I've been right were u are

So I'm begging if u just follow my advice to a T I'm 99 percent certain youl be fuckin and cuming hard asf and the more u do that with her the more your brain will associate sex as a precursor to orgasms

(Speaking from years of experience on this subject)

Good luck my friend

 

[abdnlad]

I had a normal sex life until I hit my thirties, and started going down drug holes, lost many good women because of drugs. I would start a relationship good then the drugs would take over and I would ignore the women. If I was horny, I always knew there was porn at hand. The first thing I had to deal with was the drugs, then the porn.
Now if you want to get back on the horse again, you must give porn the flick. Stop wanking and by day 3-4 you will be so horny. Make this a routine, no wanking and be with partner x2 per week.
No Porn Sex! It's all fake and not loving for her
She will feel more loved as well.
hope this helps

 

[LucidSDreamr]

Is it uncommon to prefer masturbation over sex? I have an extensive masturbation history, and I prefer it over having sex with my girlfriend. Sex doesn't really feel THAT good, and it's hard for me to cum. Just wondering if others feel the same ...

Im The same.

Not because it’s any harder to come. I just see horniness as a biological function that needs to be taken care of like taking a shit. And I’d rather get it over with as quick as possible.

I like affection and cuddling but actual sex, it’s kinda gross, especially with someone you are close to. Like I’d feel more comfortable having sex with a stranger I’ll never talk to again.

Also my wife hates sex in general so that might be part of it. She’ll have it and do what I want, but she’s doing it for me not for herself. She likes the foreplay and context of sex but she doesn’t actually derive raw sexual pleasure from sex. So I’m not sure how much of the issue is me or how much is her or if it’s a combination of both

Larry David the co creator of Seinfeld summed up this sentiment in an episode of his show curb your enthusiasm when he was talking about the animalistic or gross nature of having sex and he said “how can you do that to someone you love,?"

And I get it. It’s kinda degrading to them (at least it feels that way as a male on female). If I respect my partner I wouldn’t want to use them as a cum dumpster and “use” them for my own gratification

Getting head can feel as good or better than masturbation, but again, it feels disrespectful like I’m using the person. They don’t enjoy giving head, they are doing it as a favor to me…and I feel guilty making someone I love and respect do that to me.


I feel like a weirdo when I express my views on sex like this but I guess I’m not the only kne that feels this way…although I’m definitely in a small minority I guess.

 

[Stephy]

Is it uncommon to prefer masturbation over sex? I have an extensive masturbation history, and I prefer it over having sex with my girlfriend. Sex doesn't really feel THAT good, and it's hard for me to cum. Just wondering if others feel the same ...

that's my ex. infuriated me because he had a warm bodied woman right beside him. 7 yrs after after our divorce he's still not dating as far as anybody can tell. once or twice every 2 or 3 months was normal for him