Venting I just hate being sober

[Mushoku_Sensei]

Ok cool. I just didn't want to inadvertently do some kind of damage to someone... I know I'm... probably overthinking it. *shrug*

That's a nice trait though

And hey thanks, I thought it was moving. Sad. But... one fit well with the other. I appreciate the feedback. Like I said I didn't really make any of that stuff so I can't claim any kind of credit for it. But I like to pair things sometimes. I think lots of people do. Apparently that studio is the same studio that made some of The Witcher cinematics. They do very good work. (I made up a genre for that kind of music... "Sad Techno" ... I know, super creative lol. It was what I had to work with at the time. )

Actually some of my favorite songs I first heard in anime music videos. Fan made compilations, some of which are brilliant imo. Always liked to watch these... But never got to make one myself.
On another note I decided to taper again and not get anything new for now.. Let's see how long that lasts...

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

Same
I'm at a point now where I'll cold turkey both my anti-psychotics ahead of running out of drugs so that if I HAVE to be sober, at least I'll be psychotic...so effectively naturally not-sober because I much prefer to be delusional and hallucinating than face reality.

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

Same
I'm at a point now where I'll cold turkey both my anti-psychotics ahead of running out of drugs so that if I HAVE to be sober, at least I'll be psychotic...so effectively naturally not-sober because I much prefer to be delusional and hallucinating than face reality.

That's a damn hard statement... But as per the little I know about you, you're in a pretty damn tight situation at least health wise... So is it the physical pain you can't face or something else as well?

 

[specialrelativity]

There's always Fridays.

 

[Uden]

That's a nice trait though

Ah hey. All I can do is try.

But never got to make one myself.

There is always, tomorrow, for dreams to come true... (Corny. But I laughed.)

On another note I decided to taper again and not get anything new for now.. Let's see how long that lasts...

Well I hope it works out for you. There are definitely times I wish I had never touched drugs at all. I have some good memories, but I wonder what type of person I'd be if I hadn't ever gone down that road. C'est la vie I suppose.
I sincerely wish you the best in that endeavor.

 

[Mushoku_Sensei]

Ah hey. All I can do is try.

There is always, tomorrow, for dreams to come true... (Corny. But I laughed.)

Well I hope it works out for you. There are definitely times I wish I had never touched drugs at all. I have some good memories, but I wonder what type of person I'd be if I hadn't ever gone down that road. C'est la vie I suppose.
I sincerely wish you the best in that endeavor.

Hey! You had a very good timing fr - I was preparing an order . Didn't get to reply but I was thinking about what to reply -
And I still didn't order anything. So thanks a lot for that.
I underestimated the tapering stuff big time. It's so hard to watch the stash melt away and I admit it's scaring... Up to now I never did much of a taper but used the time when we were at my parents place and I had little to do for just withdrawing cold or maximum taking a small dose sometimes. Now I can't stay in bed and have to always be at least fairly present... Which is a whole different level of challenge and on top I believe that my current habit is also a bit more serious...
I practically spent the last week stumbling from WD to high after all, tried to stop cold twice and just couldn't bear it... Feels like the whole effort actually made the WD worse..
And it took me a while to believe that I need to really know my minimal functioning dose. I never cared about that so today is the first day I believe I'm pretty much at the minimum I need, I'm still getting WD symptoms between the doses.. and that's way more than I thought I'd need ...
I've been sick so often lately and it was all but a waste ... Anyway I really hope I can finish this before I run out.