When I first started reading BL it was .ru then .org after a while. Sucks Google removed it from search results but you can find it on the Wikipedia entry.
Ah, a DC mod! Brave! I don't know what years this took place on, but there was a period where DC mods kept leaving because they were getting arrested (knock on wood). It was almost entirely coincidental, but it was one of the reasons I turned it down when I was offered the chance to try and mod the board. I also was at a point where I didn't think I could be relied on to check the site regularly, and that was 90% of the reason I didn't do it. The other 10% was the juju, bad juju. Is Lacey K still around?
I'm here. I really only get the urge to post if I have some kind of upper, other than adderall, but I don't abuse that/or take high doses. I thought crack was fading out before I started doing dope and was surprised by how common it was. It was just such a slam to call someone a "crackhead" growing up that I thought there was such a negative connotation around it that people my age wouldn't have tried it. It's pretty good way to get your bell rung though. Probably healthier than slamming coke, but I don't know for sure.
It's hard to describe the bell ringer. I feel fixed in my environment, like I'm drawing up all the energy in the room, but can't move because of it. I purse my lips in a weird way. I do get paranoid with the crack. One thing I don't like about it. Definitely need weed and either h or fent, or oxy or some other opiate/opioid. Benzo is good too. I don't understand why I do what I do. I'd like to be off everything, just to see who that person is. I don't know him. Even when I say off everything, I don't actually mean sober. I just mean not having to use something every day just to feel normal. The last period I had was around 2010-2012. I took a lot of acid in that period and for several months my inner monologue had a British accent. It made my thoughts sound so much deeper, even the banal ones. I don't actually know if it was from the acid, but I always thought so at least.
Hey what's up with no comma before the word "but" like in sentence up above. I left comma, but computer is always telling me no comma. Well not that last sentence, but in a lot of other ones with but. Not that one either. There's a really easy way to know when to use "I" or "me". So easy, that I always wondered why we didn't learn that way. Need some more-a crack-a first. Wowzers trousers! Just imagine the sentence with one person in it. My brother and I are going to the zoo later = I'm going to the zoo later. You wouldn't say "me going to the zoo later." However, if saying "the monkeys threw bananas at my brother and I" = XXX wrong! You wouldn't say "the monkeys threw bananas at I", so in that instance it would be "the monkeys threw bananas at my brother and me". Bingo bango wingo wango.
The most unexpected part about achieving a record is that after the excitement wears down you realize that nothing has changed. Not only that, but the record even though it's been improved, is now not nearly as impressive simply because it was done by me. I guess I don't feel like I belong, like I'm an impostor. The quest is filled with hours of tedium punctuated by moments of great joy or great frustration. Sometimes my heart races so fast that it becomes distracting. Ahhh, no one cares about 1player mode. It's my only flex.
T
his is just stream of consciousness bullshit feel free to ignore.
Oh hey, was anyone here ever on Overgrow? I miss having a message board that felt like home on the internet. I had one for a while. Then ESPN buttfucked everybody, specifically after they said they wouldn't, but they did anyway. I don't know why everyone thinks big business and big corporations are the way to go. Sometimes the higher ups are so far removed from the end user that they don't know what the fuck they're doing.