then you will continue,
you've felt this way before im guessing, and have had longer stretches of good in-between.
you have done what you have done now, you want to move on, so what more to do then heal your wounds.. mentally and physically. understand what heals them, what always has.
look for a chain of events that is common, analyze yourself, heal.
the dietician stuff, that was, a goal of mine, but something i still read about and study, because its about people. not many people think about this tuff because they can. but its a passion, you do not want to be thinking about what you were, but it does pass...
balance these, this passion and pain, where is the want exactly, or the way to it & through it rather...? make the process part of the goal, you have to direct your self control, you have it, youve shared it, you've proven it here at least.