Heroin/Opioid MEGA-Thread: Junkies check-in here!

[Voltar]

shoot oxy for the first time

Hi I can take a 40 mg oxy and barely feel it. Will I be ok shooting it? The 40 mg i took was the form of percs though. And is it better to heat it or not heat it?

 

[oxyidated]

I vacillate between doing the S-boxes for a few days to get clean and slamming till I'm out of my mind. It's a crazy mixed up world!!!

 

[drug_wench]

voltar - basically its not wise to slam any pills for obvious reasons, even with proper filters
that question will get more answers in 'other drugs' anyway
as has bn mentioned before, this isnt about 'how to do it' its about supporting each other who r in the grips of addiction

carl - ive bn on suboxone since december and i know wat u mean by the dullness.....but i often find that comes with a need to up my dose
the wds will b really subtle - slight runny nose and eyes, feeling lethargic and weepy and sitting on the dunny more than usual
if u get any of those symptoms along with that dullness, according to my methadone counsellor, its time to raise ur dose
which ive had to do 3 times now - im aware im hooked physically on suboxone but as long as it keeps me off heroin im happy
wen im on the right dose for me im completely functional and happy to b alive
i guess all brain chemistries r diffrent tho - and if u cant bear life on suboxone, maybe it is best for u to wean off it
as long as u find some way of getting support for those heroin cravings!

georgie - im afraid i cant help u with where to go to get benzos
for a start that wud b sourcing technically
for another thing, im in NZ - ur in america.....2 very diffrent health systems!
if u do manage to get put on a course of benzos (like paranoid suggested, valium wud b the best) just make sure u only stay on them for as long as the withdrawals last
trust me, i wudnt wish a benzo addiction on my worst enemy
gd luck with ur detox

i really need to quit shooting up even just the sterile water - its getting ridiculous now
my arm and hand veins r all hardened and rolling now and ive started on my legs and feet
i know this is not advised and i actually hav tracks running up my feet!
i missed my appointment with my drug counsellor today (shes bn helping me reduce my IVing down to twice a week) cos i forgot and its obvious i kind of need her help
the needle fixation is the thing getting me down most atm

 

[paranoid android]

Hi I can take a 40 mg oxy and barely feel it. Will I be ok shooting it? The 40 mg i took was the form of percs though. And is it better to heat it or not heat it?

I hope to god your not planning on slamming percocets. You can't even snort anything with acetaminophen in it because it's not water soluble and is bad for you let alone shoot it! It will just gunk up and even if you CWE it there will still be some in the mix and you would be shooting a very unsterile solution with leftover acetaminophen and fuck knows what else is in it.

Some people do shoot up products with pure oxycodone like oxycontins, oxy IR's aka roxicodone but even that is very dangerous due to all the fillers in it. So it's nowhere safe to shoot that up and i can't advise anyone to do it in the name of harm reduction.

Besides oxycodone has a very high oral bioavailability so there is no sense in taking it any other way. Just eat the damn things. This question is not suited at all to the dark side and would be much better in OD. The only reason i ansered it was because i didnt want someone trying to shoot these pills up so i thought id atleast try to get them not to do it.

i really need to quit shooting up even just the sterile water - its getting ridiculous now
my arm and hand veins r all hardened and rolling now and ive started on my legs and feet
i know this is not advised and i actually hav tracks running up my feet!
i missed my appointment with my drug counsellor today (shes bn helping me reduce my IVing down to twice a week) cos i forgot and its obvious i kind of need her help
the needle fixation is the thing getting me down most atm

You really do need to give up shooting up anything at all. But if you have to shoot up something because of your needle fixation get saline made for injection because it's the safest thing to shoot up. Even sterile water can be dangerous.

I hope you beat your needle fixation soon. That must really suck .

 

[Respectable junkie]

i really need to quit shooting up even just the sterile water - its getting ridiculous now
my arm and hand veins r all hardened and rolling now and ive started on my legs and feet
i know this is not advised and i actually hav tracks running up my feet!
i missed my appointment with my drug counsellor today (shes bn helping me reduce my IVing down to twice a week) cos i forgot and its obvious i kind of need her help
the needle fixation is the thing getting me down most atm

I have never admitted it before but i think i have a slight needle fixation.
I know its weird but i love injecting. Not just the high from the drug,i enjoy the actual process off injecting. I sit there and just pull blood in and out for ages. I haven't yet resorted to injecting water but i will do the tiniest bit of gear thats not even gonna do anything,i do my filters,the filters of my filters - anything thats got the slightest bit of colour to it.
I shouldn't be injecting at all and i know it. 2 and a half years ago i had to have 3 fingers chopped off through injecting. I had been trying for ages,it'd be in then i'd check and it'd come out,the pin was full off blood and it had congealed. It wasn't liquid anymore it was a wormy paste. But i'd rammed congealed gear in loads of times (stupidly) so when i finally registered that was it,i forced it in. It didn't hurt when i was pushing it in but about 30seconds later all my hand and arm started burning and going numb. I shook it about a bit and ran it under some water and it felt better so i went to sleep. I woke up with the most incredible pain in my arm and hand. I looked at my hand and it was blue i went straight to the hospital but it was too late. According to the doctors i'd injected into an artery and all the congealed shit had destroyed the blood vessels in my fingers,luckily the rest of my hand recovered,i could've lost the whole thing.
I tried smoking my H for a while but i just didn't enjoy it. I craved to inject. So after a year i started injecting again and here i am.
I am on methadone and i think if i could stop injecting i could stop using all together or at least have a much better chance.
Any advice would be appreciated,i need to find a way to make myself hate injecting as much as i hated smoking it.

Drug wench - best of luck giving up and thanks,reading your post has helped me admit my problem.

 

[DubCity23]

I have never admitted it before but i think i have a slight needle fixation.
I know its weird but i love injecting. Not just the high from the drug,i enjoy the actual process off injecting. I sit there and just pull blood in and out for ages. I haven't yet resorted to injecting water but i will do the tiniest bit of gear thats not even gonna do anything,i do my filters,the filters of my filters - anything thats got the slightest bit of colour to it.
I shouldn't be injecting at all and i know it. 2 and a half years ago i had to have 3 fingers chopped off through injecting. I had been trying for ages,it'd be in then i'd check and it'd come out,the pin was full off blood and it had congealed. It wasn't liquid anymore it was a wormy paste. But i'd rammed congealed gear in loads of times (stupidly) so when i finally registered that was it,i forced it in. It didn't hurt when i was pushing it in but about 30seconds later all my hand and arm started burning and going numb. I shook it about a bit and ran it under some water and it felt better so i went to sleep. I woke up with the most incredible pain in my arm and hand. I looked at my hand and it was blue i went straight to the hospital but it was too late. According to the doctors i'd injected into an artery and all the congealed shit had destroyed the blood vessels in my fingers,luckily the rest of my hand recovered,i could've lost the whole thing.
I tried smoking my H for a while but i just didn't enjoy it. I craved to inject. So after a year i started injecting again and here i am.
I am on methadone and i think if i could stop injecting i could stop using all together or at least have a much better chance.
Any advice would be appreciated,i need to find a way to make myself hate injecting as much as i hated smoking it.

Drug wench - best of luck giving up and thanks,reading your post has helped me admit my problem.

Was the shot into your hand before that happened? Damn , thats crazy im sorry man i feel bad.

What do you all think of my situation right now? I've been on suboxone maintence for about 2-3 they have me on 24 mg a day but i take 8 at most i relapse every weekend either just friday or friday and sat and sunday then take subs rest of week. I work 40 hours im legit but i keep relapsing i really dont want to quit to be honest .. I got sick from doing it 3 days in a row and 2 days in a row but if it's only 1 day i won't get sick even with taking subs. I feel like im fuckin with my brain well i probably am

 

[eon_blue]

------------

I'd like to be able to tell her about my using and I'd like to be completely honest in that regards, but she doesn't really understand the addiction and I don't want to drag her down with it. She's already worried about me since I told her I'd been having cravings.

I'd like to believe she'd stay with me, but the damage that it would do to our relationship isn't worth it IMO.

I have to back you up on this, I don't blame you for not wanting to come clean with her about past dishonesty.

My (ex ) girlfriend was only able to better understand addiction after finding out about my relapse. It was only then that she finally understood how fucking hard it is for an addict to stay clean, especially when life throws some shit your way.

Unfortunately, her understanding didn't mean we could be together. Some people just aren't made to be able to watch their loved ones behave in self-destructive ways; to have to sit by on the edge of their seats 24/7 wondering when the next big 'relapse' will be....

So yeah, that said, I don't recommend opening up about the past. I do recommend though doing whatever you can to prevent yourself from being dishonest again. 'Cause like I said before, she'll find out eventually. We play against some pretty big odds when we start using, and the longer you draw it out the more risk you take.

 

[`pr0digy]

Hey guys - haven't been on BL in a while. Really busy nowdays. God willing, I'll have 9 months tomorrow. It's great being sober guys, really! Hope everyone is doing alright! Get this shit behind you and move on. I'm really busy now, but I've been able to hold a single job, getting decent grades in college, and I'm actually HAPPY.

 

[RxobbyOC]

Hey Everyone! I just signed up for this message board about 3 days ago, and have kind of just been lurking around, getting the feel of it. But i found this Thread and just had to post in it,since i have quite the opiate story and such.


anyway, to start it off, I am 18 years old(i'll be 19 in May:D), and I've been doing opiates since i was 14, about 5 months shy of turning 15.It all started with My friends moms Morphine 30 Rx,when i was 14.We would literally steal them from her, everyday,(she never notced,or atleast never said anything, which is REALLY wierd,cause we toook aloooooooooooot!)By the time i was 15, I was full-on physically addicted to Morphine.In September of 2005,(still 15), I OD'd on Morphine, and was placed into a local Detox for 4 days.I got out, and that day, started using.( as you can tell, my parents arent very caring people, at all.They really could care less about what i do, they probably wouldnt even notice if iw ere dead or alive half the time.)My friend had picked me up from my house, i had stolen 20 dollars from my mom, and bought an OC40.Soon after, my phsyical addiction was back full force, but sicne the OD and my friends mom finding out that i OD'd on her Rx,that was all over.So i was more catious,and since i couldnt really afford much, i would just somehow scrounge up enough to get enough pills so i wouldnt be sick, i couldnt afford to OD.By March of 2006, i met a kid named Jon.He had just moved to FL from NY, and was telling me all about heroin, and how its just like all the pills i had become dependant on.( i didnt even know that at it was at all anything alike, at the time, haha!)A few days after, I was blowing my first bag of Heroin, and thats when I fell in love.I shot up for the First time on my 16th birthday, and i never snoterd anything again, still till this day.I continued using heroin and continued shooting up,(Until NOvember 4th, 2008) at whatever cost and whatever i had to do to get it.Even though i Still use everyday,(I'm back on pills, Hydromorphone and OXY) I have a guilty conscience about what i had done.NEither of my parents have any jewlery left, No valueables, all of my electronics, my brothers electronics,DVDS, anything of value was stolen and sold.I stole my parents checkbook numerous times and nearly cleared out their bank accounts,cauing there checks to bill companies to bounce on many occasions.My dad Moved to NYC for his job in 07, and on September 29th,08, i texted him telling him i needed help, and on November 4th, I was checked into Marworth Rehab in Waverly PA,for 36 days, on a suboxone taper, and when i got out and got back to FLA, i had saved all the money i got sent to me in rehab, and i bought 6 blues,(roxi 30s), and ive been using everyday since. I really cant get away from it all, even when i do want to get clean, sorry this was so long,but i felt my life story was a neccassary one for this thread.I know alot about opiates, from experiance and from reading information, as well.( i got REALLY obsessed at some point)so if anyone has any questions or anything just ask me,thanks ya'll!




xoxo,robby.

 

[lollerskater]

Iam a 23 yr. old male and I have been dependent on drugs from age 12. I have recently went to rehab for opiate addiction and was doing great. I have since relapsed on pills and now Iam addicted to porn as well. They say thats a classic sign of drug addiction. I used heroin and my wife didn't know until I od'ed on the bathroom floor after christmas. I have no sex drive and can't stay aroused. My wife found all the porn sites and pharmacuticals sites. We have a 5 yr. old and one due in Oct.... What should I do struggling badly. Should I walk away from my family or fight my addiction again???????? Anyone.

I also just days ago, drank a liter of vodka, forgot to get my son at pre-school. (by the way we are 20ft. from the school. School called my wife at work, my mom found me all passed out. Wife came home she said I was choking on my vomit. Got in my truck. Evaded the cops and got a D.U.I. and other charges. My wife put a restraining order on my for 2 weeks. I just can't grow up.... Any ideas what to do or good advice were to start!!!! HELP PLEASE

Dude, you have GOT to stay clean. Don't fight your wife on the restraining order-- you've got to be on your absolute best behavior. Not just to try to convince her to stay, but if she decides to leave and has a custody battle. If you love your wife and your kids, you have to put them first NOW and do everything you can to keep the family together. That's a shitty position to be in and spousal problems are a big relapse trigger, I feel for you. But you can do it!

 

[Carl Landrover]

I have to back you up on this, I don't blame you for not wanting to come clean with her about past dishonesty.

My (ex ) girlfriend was only able to better understand addiction after finding out about my relapse. It was only then that she finally understood how fucking hard it is for an addict to stay clean, especially when life throws some shit your way.

Unfortunately, her understanding didn't mean we could be together. Some people just aren't made to be able to watch their loved ones behave in self-destructive ways; to have to sit by on the edge of their seats 24/7 wondering when the next big 'relapse' will be....

So yeah, that said, I don't recommend opening up about the past. I do recommend though doing whatever you can to prevent yourself from being dishonest again. 'Cause like I said before, she'll find out eventually. We play against some pretty big odds when we start using, and the longer you draw it out the more risk you take.

I have told her about my past, just not anything that I've done since I met her. 8) My initial relapse, almost a year ago, actually occurred just before we started seeing each other. Shitty timing on that one.

It's a shitty situation, but it's my own fault. I'd rather try and bury it and pretend it never happened. Just walk forward from here. I don't know though, it's tough.

I agree with everything you're saying though. And from experience, I definitely agree that if I continue to try and hide it, at one point she's going to find out.



Anyhow, how's everything going with you man? How are things with your parents and your ex?

 

[drug_wench]

paranoid android - all they offer at our needle exchange is sterile water
no saline

ive bn...ummm.....clean from IVing water (god that sounds stupid...) since i posted that last one but my veins r still all nasty looking and i had to go for a blood test today
it took the nurse so long to get the blood out and she had to go in pretty deep - it hurt cos the vein was so hard
i felt like screaming 'just go into my fucking leg!'

dubcity - i think the problem with the way suboxone is given out in america allows u guys to abuse it, which IMO makes it pointless
over here, we pick up our suboxone at a clinic or pharmacy and they watch us take it - we dont get takeaways until a set amount of time
theres no way i cud take heroin (without ODing) cos otherwise id get booted off the program for not turning up for my dose (of suboxone)

personally, i think if u want to stop abusing heroin then u need someone to dole out ur subs to u and actually make sure u take them - as in watch u as it dissolves in ur mouth
i dont get at all why suboxone is just prescribed to ppl so they can take it as they like, overseas - hello, were junkies....if i cud id probly abuse it.....

 

[Carl Landrover]

dubcity - i think the problem with the way suboxone is given out in america allows u guys to abuse it, which IMO makes it pointless
over here, we pick up our suboxone at a clinic or pharmacy and they watch us take it - we dont get takeaways until a set amount of time
theres no way i cud take heroin (without ODing) cos otherwise id get booted off the program for not turning up for my dose (of suboxone)

personally, i think if u want to stop abusing heroin then u need someone to dole out ur subs to u and actually make sure u take them - as in watch u as it dissolves in ur mouth
i dont get at all why suboxone is just prescribed to ppl so they can take it as they like, overseas - hello, were junkies....if i cud id probly abuse it.....

Doesn't that take awhile (waiting for all the sub to be dissolved)? Seems like it would be a waste of time for whomever is watching the person dose.

And how do they taper you down then? Do they cut up pills for you when you want to get off or do they just have you stop at 2mg?

 

[eon_blue]

Doesn't that take awhile (waiting for all the sub to be dissolved)? Seems like it would be a waste of time for whomever is watching the person dose.

And how do they taper you down then? Do they cut up pills for you when you want to get off or do they just have you stop at 2mg?

oh man, stopping someone at 2mg of bupe should be a crime, lol.

I'll be the first to admit that I'm a pussy when it comes to withdrawling, but even when I tapered down to .25mg/day I was still hurting. Well, not hurting, but uncomfortable chills/sweats/insomnia.

That's why I'm such an advocate for short term sub usage, unless it's absolutely necessary for someone who would otherwise keep using. It's by no means an easy drug to come off of

 

[Carl Landrover]

^
I definitely agree on that.

I have gone cold turkey a couple of times, forced to for a few days once. Other than those times, I'm kind of a puss about WDs. I don't like being uncomfortable like that. The 2 times I really tapered off, I went down to a guess-timated, .1-.2mg and I'd still get some night sweats/chills and the mental funk.

I see a lot of people on here post about how they stopped after 1-2mg and I can't figure out how or why. Unless they really don't feel WDs from stopping at that point, but I would be wayyy too uncomfortable to jump off at 2mg.

 

[Miss Hollywood]

Hey Carl! LOVE your posts! I relate to them alot even though I am female! Your like the male version of me! I swear! lol just the shit you say is the shit that goes through my head! lol

I'm currently on subs. I just dropped my dose this week down to 6 mgs cuz I'm so constipated I feel like shit balls are gonna start comming out of my eyes!LOL! I've used every god damn laxitive, stool softener, and supositories under the sun and making a bowl movement is still a difficult thing to acheive.

Plus I'm just kinda sick of all the nightmares I've been having, which I think are being caused by the suboxone. I think its a combination of suboxone and getting sober.(I've been clean for 3 months)

Today I made the mistake of mentioning suboxone at an NA meeting today. You would have thought I said "Jesus Christ fucked yo momma!" the way the people there reacted! LOL! God forbid you aren't one of those people that can stay sober without a little help from "another drug".

I'm so over NA. Bunch of hypocritical holy rollers that think they and their "12 Steps" don't stink!

Well I smell SHIT!!!! LOL

Just my 2 cents lol

 

[drug_wench]

carl - ive always jumped off at 2mg in the past (but ive only bn on it as long as 2 weeks in the past and even then it was unpleasant)
it doesnt take that long to dissolve unless the pharmacist happens to b one of the few who give it out in whole pills - most of my pharmacists crush the pills so they dissolve faster

as for jumping off - im not sure how they handle that cos im not in any way ready to even cut my dose down yet but im sure theyll just crush the pills the way theyve already bn doing, only theyll crush the 2mg pills and give me half then quarter etc of those (my guess anyway)
that or ill get the dose evry second day then evry third day etc....who knows

all i know is the NZ way seems to stop ppl abusing it
sub maintenance is rare over here anyway - most junkies who want to (or 'want to') stop go on MMT cos its free and easy to abuse

miss hollywood - i find my bowel movements hav bn a lot easier since ive changed my diet
i drink a lot of licorice tea, eat a lot of muesli, wholemeal bread, vegies and fruit (dried apricots and prunes r the best)
now even tho i generally hav to push a fair bit at least i go evry day regularly (a gd toke of pot and a few cups of coffee seem to loosen my bowels too)

and yes, ur crazy dreams cud b attributed to suboxone - it gives me crazy dreams too
however i quite enjoy them

i dont bother going to NA anymore either
it helped me for awhile but i see it as too over-the-top and of course im not going to b seen as clean wen im on *gasp* suboxone and *gasp* the odd joint
however lets try and refrain from knocking it cos it does help plenty of us here on this forum

hit into my foot earlier and i think i went right thru the vein as theres a big bruise and wen i pushed down the plunger the site just swelled up so i stopped
im getting bad circulation in my feet so im finding i hav to put them up on chairs wen i sit down more and more or i lose feeling in them or get pins and needles
THIS HAS GOT TO FUCKING STOP - IM JUST NOT SURE HOW!

 

[eon_blue]

^
I definitely agree on that.

I have gone cold turkey a couple of times, forced to for a few days once. Other than those times, I'm kind of a puss about WDs. I don't like being uncomfortable like that. The 2 times I really tapered off, I went down to a guess-timated, .1-.2mg and I'd still get some night sweats/chills and the mental funk.

I see a lot of people on here post about how they stopped after 1-2mg and I can't figure out how or why. Unless they really don't feel WDs from stopping at that point, but I would be wayyy too uncomfortable to jump off at 2mg.

Yeah, I can't figure it out either how some people get by doing that (jumping off at 2mg) by themselves.

When I went into rehab last April I was abruptly taken off of rough 4-6mg of bupe, and for some reason it didn't feel quite as shitty as it has when I've tried to do it on my own.

They didn't give me anything for detox aside from motrin, vitamins, flexeril and clonidine too.

Although I did have a wicked case of restless legs, insomnia and stomach problems for a good month to two months. Now that I think of it, maybe it was that bad lol. The insomnia drove me fucking CRAZY.

I think being in rehab and not having to worry about going to work and school while sick made it 10 times easier though. These days when I experience the slightest bit of withdrawal and I have to go to work/school, I'll be in a horrible mood and feel completely unmotivated all day. Being in rehab and just kicking back/going to a few meetings definitely made it easier.

 

[v4lium]

Yeah, I can't figure it out either how some people get by doing that (jumping off at 2mg) by themselves.

Shit hurts but It won't kill.

Never did cold turkey off of bupe but I've done ct off many other opiates.

Sometimes it just needs to be done, I always feel better about myself after a CT jump than a tapered one. I can say to myself "I took the hard way out, fucked it in the ass and I'm standing here breathing"

Granted I don't like the idea of ct anymore than the next guy but I definitely feel better after the w/d's are gone to know I took the problem on full force and conquered it.

 

[Miss Hollywood]

Thanks for the advice drug_wench! I'll have to try apricots and prunes! A cup of coffee and a cig sometimes give me the urge...its hit or miss with me! hit or miss seems to be the theme of my life! LOL!