That's a good spot, but it fell off since then.
you in philly?
Subotai- I can really relate to what your going through with your family and there expectations. What I eventually figured out is that ou gotta do what you gotta do for you. As long as you have a job and can support yourself than there opinion is just background bullshit. I think you have the right idea about getting on maintenance. It always amazes me that you guys can hold your shot together for so long without having a sun script to fall back on in lean times. I'm pretty sure I would have ended up in prison for doing dumb stuff for money to get well had it not been for my script.
As for me. Life on methadone is really nice so far. I have stabilized my dose at 70mg and I feel really good. Minimal cravings and I am still getting a nice glow for a few hours after I dose in the morning. My plan is to save up some money and use it to move out west to a pot friendly state where I can get a medical card and live my life in a comfortable legal haze. I mean shit gotta have dreams right?
yeah you are right crimson but it's tough to find a place to live when you dont have anyone to split the rent with. I make 9$ an hour, I cant afford an apartment solely to myself, or I could afford to pay for an apartment and that's it. because eating is overrated anyway...
I've been all over the place mentally the past couple days. I was so sure that this Vivitrol shot would have worn off by now because it was my first one but I still cant get the high that I want. And that just makes me want it even more. Im on Day 27 and I feel more addicted than I did before I got it.
I don't know, I've been having weird feelings lately. Feelings like my time might be running out here. I don't know how, but I just cant escape this thought that I might die soon.
and sometimes I'll wonder if I actually am in a coma in real life from a drug overdose and everything im experiencing is just a dream from the coma.
yeah, im walking and talking, but I'm not even here mentally. I've just been going through the motions for the past month.
oh and my aunt got way too fucked up yesterday and my brother found an empty baggie in our house and told my mom that I was buying dope for my aunt so now my mom is all salty towards me.
He's such a fucking punkass man, my brother that is. He's been ratting me out over shit from day 1, while I never said shit about what he was doing.
even when he was smoking crack. even when he was selling coke for like a week, even when he was dating a girl from the ghetto with 2 kids, even when he got fired from the job we worked at.
I dont say shit about shit, and I never will. But I cant expect him to change, that's just who he is
a fucking rat