Then there was the story of the kool cigarette <> no cops , just being an idiot
Starts out innocently enough, me and my buddy from all the other stories planned on leaving campus to get high in the park across the street. Almost 20 years ago now. High-school senior year came with a few perks, like not having a last class to go to. So most of us got out of school an hour early. That particular day I had brought with me a pack of Kool blue cigarettes and a joint.
Me and my buddy met up at his car and drove off campus over to a bank parking lot near the park across the street. We got out and started walking down the sidewalk in the park. We knew a few spots that you could get off the main trail and into the actual woods in the park. These places were known by most kids at the school and used by ppl to stash there stuff when they were skipping school. Sure enough when we got to the spot we saw a few backpacks and notebooks under a few trees.
I pulled out my hidden cigarette pack and lit up the joint first. Passing it back and forth my friend and I just chilling and quietly laughing and talking about whatever. Its then that I first felt my stomach rumbling. I was going to need to poop sooner rather that later.
After the joint was done we spark up a cigarette each. After a couple drags i feel my stomach cramp up bad. I need to poop now !! Or im going to crap my pants. But because we were high we didn't want to go back on campus. So I just ran over to a fallen tree and had explosive diarrhea. My buddy had walked the opposite direction and was going through those backpacks we had found earlier.
Once I felt like I was pretty much over the worst of it , came the next issue, I had nothing to umm wipe with. So I called out to my buddy and told him to pick a backpack and throw it over my way. He knew what I was going to do and immediately started laughing and saying something like ohh no way bro thats soo baddd!!
So I get this random kids backpack and open it. Theres a notebook and in it a spiral labeled "biology" , i open it and tare several pages of science notes out and , wipe my self with it.
Then I throw the used papers back in the notebook, back into the backpack, and zip it back up. Then my buddy and me whole are now laughing hysterically so much that we are crying start to leave the area. Just before we leave , he picked up the backpacks, opens them and throws them in all directions. He then throws the backpack with the diarrhea notes into a tree and it gets stuck about 10 feet in the air.
I was heading back up to campus to meet my gf to take me somewhere. My buddy was running to his car because suddenly he had to poop too. As I was walking back on the sidewalk back towards school the best or worst part of the story happened. As im walking back to campus, I come upon 4 underclassmen walking the opposite direction, 3 dudes and a chick. The girl sees me and asked if I had a cigarette. I knew immediately they were the owners of the backpacks and all I could do was shake my head and bust out laughing. So we kept walking opposite ways . I made it around the next bend in the trail and started jogging knowing it was a matter of a few minutes before those teens saw there stuff scattered in the woods.
As i made it almost all the way back to campus there's a bridge that crosses a creek next to a four lane road. I heard a blood curling girls screem . And knew right then I was going to hell. Lol
I only told that story to 5 people in my whole life because well , its bad. I dont know who those ppl were , and just goes to show you. Sometimes when you skip school, you will get diarrhea in your backpack.
+
