• LAVA Moderator: Shinji Ikari

Do people perceive you the way you actually are?

3rd person me is a whooooole lot different from 1st person me. :D

People tend to perceive me as as very quiet (which I am, initially), shy, and just overall a straightedge average joe. People think that I'm a pushover, soft guy... a "teddy bear" so to speak... LOL most people are awestruck when they get to know the uncontained me. :p
 
i scare more people than i'm actually comfortable with.


i'm not angry..... i'm passionate, bitches!
 
No, they percieve you through the filter of themselves. The important part is, do YOU percieve yourself as you actually are? Sorry if that sounds quasi-preachy, but I think it holds water- or piss.
 
I'm very real....what you see is what you get . But the overwhelming first impression I give IRL (as I'm told by all my friends, acquaintances, and everybody else who has gotten to know me ) is that I am very intimidating and snobby. The intimidating part can be true if I don't like you...but I am the complete opposite of a snob and am in fact very down to earth and like being inconspicuous.
I also get " i didn't know you were fucking CRAZY!" all the time ;)
 
i don't really care. i wouldn't want to acknowledge someone who would judge the shit out of me before we even get a chance to talk. ah well, they're missing out on a fun drunk with some great drug stories :D
 
but nobody else can objectively perceive you either so is there a "true perception" of a person at all?
 
I think that the judgments others make of you as a person and the judgments you make of yourself as a person are all subjective, based on an individual morality.

By extension, the judgment itself, from one concerning another, is more of a reflection of the judge than the judged.

“There are three things extremely hard: steel, a diamond, and to know one's self. - Benjamin Franklin”
 
Objectivity is overrated. I say if a tree falls in the woods and no one hears it, it makes no sound.

If I can be very Taoist about the matter, the perception of you by other sentient beings is an ingredient in the creation of 'who you are'. Each individual's perception of you, (especially) including your own perception of yourself, will lend its own unique flavor to the final product called your identity.
 
mdoa, how do the sum of the fleeting perceptions from others weigh up against a lifetime of self perception?

from a zen-ish standpoint, i'd argue that one is more oneself when not in a state of self reflection, but more in a state of one being.

although self reflective practices stimulate and steer intellectual growth (so to speak), they also hinder spiritual development. so i guess there is something to buddha claiming that the middle stance is best.
 
No doubt someone's own biases will influence the way they perceive you..

Guess you'd know yourself and your own short comings..Unless your head was completely encased in your ass. Whether willing to accept that though?? Depends on the person. Everyone is different, hell I love confrontations (shit-stirring, bantering), but then everyone with the same personality of a wet sponge (or spiteful, or a territorial 2 year old, or even pinchy grandma's with false teeth; whatever you want) would get boring quickly.

But if you're uncomfortable with someones personality, I don't think it is something you can change, they have to want that for themselves, so just begone with it, fuck them, easy to make new friends, unless you are an actual sponge. Or just grow a backbone. Either way should theoretically work, but since I have no friends outside the internet, I could just assuming here???? Or more then likely just talking complete shit. Your choice.
 
or if you are actually interested in the subject try a book of some sort

carnegie.jpg


I'd probably recommend this version though

NSFW:
influenceik6.jpg
 
aanallein said:
^ everybody judges everybody else. its human nature.

that's why i said judge the SHIT out of me :D i kno people are gonna judge me preliminarily, i just have a problem with people who judge so absolutely that they will decide whether they wanna kno me or not before i even get a chance to say hello.

to me, that just demonstrates a person who has a very limited life experience because their paradigms are so narrowed that they have no other criteria to judge me with than how my clothes look or other superficial shit. i have nothing to gain by trying to be friends with a person like that anyway, because there's probably not a lot i could learn from them
 
If you meet me and get to know me then what you see is what you get. I'm an open person and i find people "get me" quite well in real life.

Here however is another story. I still feel that what you "see" is what you get as i'm open here as well but i must just suck at communicating in written form cos people seem to not really see who i am at all here (mostly anyway)
 
Short answer is no people don't perceive me the way I am, I have a complex personality, and a lot of issues so there misjudgement is sometimes my using one of my many masks to not display who I really am.

All said, and done I don't let a lot of people get as close to me as they otherwise might that's mostly because i've been hurt by a lot of people in my life, and I don't have a lot to give if I get hurt again.

It's the poker chip theory in action.

I have have 1000 chips you have 3 Stacks of High Society who will play more conservatively?

If I lose 2 bets of 500 I'm out of the game you can lose 500 chips 60 times before I’m out so I’m gonna take less risks because I can't afford to take the losses.

People get scared off by me, and see me as being weird, these are mostly the people who don't take the time to get to know me.

I am probably one of the most compassionate people in the world, and if you take the time to know me am probably one the best friends you could have.

Trouble is people get scared off of me because sometimes I'm a little reserved... it's something I'm working on, but it still happens
 
I think so. But in considering my answer I went on an internal monologue about percieving oneself, then controlling what image you project. I thought of how some people 'simply exist' and care neither how they appear nor what others think. Then there are those that are only concerned with what others think and bend themselves to appear better in other people's eyes. And still others that accept themselves, regardless of other people's views. But I got lost in the conversation and just now came back to the thread.

So, to answer the question, I think a lot of people 'get me' from the start. I don't have time to waste with 'impressions' or 'innuendo'. This is me, simple and honest - lets move on.
 
many people assume i am not american when they first meet me, which i find really odd since i have lived in ohio my entire life.
 
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