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Cutting v. 2

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FictitiousThinking said:
whenever i cut myself part of the rush for me is definately the pain. but then afterwards i take a spray with alcohol in it and drown it and i enjoy that even more. im a little confused at this point with myself.
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Yeah it is confusing huh.
But it's all part of self-harm I guess, a lot of aspects of it are confusing.
How often do you do it? Do you see yourself stopping cutting sometime soon?
 
FictitiousThinking said:
I just started again but based on lack of availability of other drugs i think it is going to rage out of control
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Ahhh I see.
You should maybe try to limit how much you do it though, keep some control. I'm not saying you should stop doing it because like a lot of us here you obviously get something out of doing it. But as with everything else in life, all is good in moderation :)
 
In my opinion, everything people say to do to stop you from cutting is a complete waste of time and they make me feel like an idiot. There is nothing that can replace the release of frustration and anger like damaging yourself and leaving scars. I'm definitely a self-mutilation addict, its sick
 
A non-cutter, definitely not here to troll, but to ask a question. I've seen a lot of analysis of what leads to relapse in drugs and alcohol. Are those things similar for cutters? Like the HALT thing with alcoholics to be weary of being hungry, angry, tired and lonely cause those are relapse prone periods.

Second question which was my actual intent in posting. When I've seen evidence of cutting on casual friends and inquired if they are OK, it seemed I was really offending. Would people who have been cutters tell me if they think I ought ignore such things unless I'm really close. When I was younger I may have reacted a little to emotionally. What support can non-cutters offer?
 
^this i want to know too
i hav had 2 friends who cut, and i always wanted to help but wasnt sure how
is there any way? how do cutters feel wen approached about something so personal by someone who doesnt cut?
 
Enki said:
A non-cutter, definitely not here to troll, but to ask a question. I've seen a lot of analysis of what leads to relapse in drugs and alcohol. Are those things similar for cutters? Like the HALT thing with alcoholics to be weary of being hungry, angry, tired and lonely cause those are relapse prone periods.

Second question which was my actual intent in posting. When I've seen evidence of cutting on casual friends and inquired if they are OK, it seemed I was really offending. Would people who have been cutters tell me if they think I ought ignore such things unless I'm really close. When I was younger I may have reacted a little to emotionally. What support can non-cutters offer?
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drug_wench said:
^this i want to know too
i hav had 2 friends who cut, and i always wanted to help but wasnt sure how
is there any way? how do cutters feel wen approached about something so personal by someone who doesnt cut?
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Very good questions guys. I have no idea how someone could successfully approach a cutter...

As I've said before, 3 of my immediate family members have asked me about my scars at some point, and I always said they were animal scratches. They have never asked since.

I've got a big keloid one on my right arm and if I'm ever asked about it I tell people it's a burn.

When I was still at high school my best friends sat me down and asked me about it, and I was absolutely mortified that they had noticed the scars. I always thought no-one could see/notice them. :\

The stars I cut into my foot have star tattoos over them now. And I've got a big deep star cut into my left leg, but no-one ever asks about that! I guess it's so obvious that it's self-induced.
 
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i talked to one of my friends about it at a high school party - i took her aside wen we were having a joint and asked her about it and she broke down and started to tell me how she just cudnt stop so i put my arm around her and from there she got angry at me and told me not to talk to her about it again
i dont think its something u shud b ashamed of - i didnt see my friends as weak ppl because they cut, i just saw them as dealing with their issues in a diffrent way to the way i dealt with mine
i think we all use coping mechanisms that not evryone is going to see as healthy
 
drug_wench said:
i talked to one of my friends about it at a high school party - i took her aside wen we were having a joint and asked her about it and she broke down and started to tell me how she just cudnt stop so i put my arm around her and from there she got angry at me and told me not to talk to her about it again
i dont think its something u shud b ashamed of - i didnt see my friends as weak ppl because they cut, i just saw them as dealing with their issues in a diffrent way to the way i dealt with mine
i think we all use coping mechanisms that not evryone is going to see as healthy
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I can definitely empathise with how your friend reacted! But that's really good that you approached her in that way, she would have appreciated your concern even though she didn't react very well :)

You're right DW, everyone has their own coping mechanisms. Some are more or less "harmful" than others, but everyone's different.

This discussion has actually reminded me of something else that happened at high school. I used to be friends with this horrible BITCH of a girl, who no-one else liked because she was so manipulative and so horrible to everyone so I befriended her cos I felt sorry for her. Big mistake! She used me and manipulated me, and once when she was picking a fight with me she yelled out "You only cut yourself for attention!" really loud so everyone around could hear. And it was lunch time so there were many people within earshot...
It still hurts to think about that!! It was so horrible.
Lucky everyone just turned a blind eye, so to speak, as everyone understood that she was just a bitch.
 
drug_wench said:
i talked to one of my friends about it at a high school party - i took her aside wen we were having a joint and asked her about it and she broke down and started to tell me how she just cudnt stop so i put my arm around her and from there she got angry at me and told me not to talk to her about it again
i dont think its something u shud b ashamed of - i didnt see my friends as weak ppl because they cut, i just saw them as dealing with their issues in a diffrent way to the way i dealt with mine
i think we all use coping mechanisms that not evryone is going to see as healthy
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Is that really in the best interest of harm reduction, however? Isn't the general consensus one should work on moving away from cutting practices? It seems like most people are in turmoil and suffering revolving their cutting habits- I think your 'different coping mechanisms that not everyone is going to see as healthy' is bad advice imo. That is, when the coping mechanism is cutting, scarring and injuring oneself rather than addressing your problem.

Sorry DW, all respect but i think this kind of condones it in some way.
 
BeenArrested4Pot said:
Isn't the general consensus one should work on moving away from cutting practices? It seems like most people are in turmoil and suffering revolving their cutting habits- I think your 'different coping mechanisms that not everyone is going to see as healthy' is bad advice imo. That is, when the coping mechanism is cutting, scarring and injuring oneself rather than addressing your problem.

Sorry DW, all respect but i think this kind of condones it in some way.
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You know i had a discomfort with transsexuals I couldn't quite bring to the surface. I realized that having a penis sliced off seemed a horrible mutilation. I had to decide that it was their body to do with as they like. I can not speak for cutters but fully showing it is their body might be a part of cutting for some.

Anyway DW and others who show compassion first, while waiting to understand, have a foundation on which to promote harm reduction later on.
 
If anybody ever approached me about it I ran like hell the other way. I don't talk about it. I'm more willing to talk about drugs than cutting. I don't know why, just is. I can't deal with people's strong opinions very well. Plus alot of people wouldn't agree with the rest of the ways I live, I don't want any part of their self righteous bullshit. If they wanna talk about it in a more civil way then fine, but that's not how most conversations turn out.
 
n3ophy7e said:
Yep I feel this way about the cutting that I do at the moment (see my post towards the top of the page). I'm not sure how to think about it actually! Is it good that I don't feel bad about doing it, or is it worse because I don't care about what I'm doing to myself?? Confusing! :\
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Its an addiction. Lots and lots of drug addicts don't feel bad about it. It is a way to relieve themselves- for them it is getting high. For you it is cutting yourself.
 
beenarrestedforpot - i am merely trying to understand rather than condone
but im sorry if it came across that way
this is a sensitive subject and im hardly going to come out and say 'stop cutting' cos i hav never desired to do it myself and therefore cant understand it
 
"Stop cutting" will work for some, but not all.

I think Enki makes a good point regarding transexuals. Circumcision (if, and only if it were performed exclusively on adults who could decide for themselves), tatooing, and ear (and other) piercing are also examples of socially accepted forms of self-mutilation.

I certainly don't think any of these things ought to be illegal, provided the person having the mutilating done (by self or assisted) is an adult.

As I've stated before, I think this is mostly about garnering attention. This is because the fad has become particularly popular with youths. Please understand that I refer to it as a fad because twenty years ago, cutting was practically unheard of. The main reason people are doing it is because they hear about other people doing it.

I think the appeal lies in that it's a dark, scary thing to do. It's an inexpensive way of making a pseudo-martyr of the cutter - it helps to paint him or her as a "tortured soul", which - for a young person - can seem pretty cool (a la "The Crow", Marilyn Manson, etc).

Some self-mutilation is relatively harmless (as a kid, I used to bite off the skin around my fingernails). Whether it's seriously damaging or not, I think the decision ought to be left to the individual - unless he or she is a minor.

For minors, I think they need to be loved, but also kept from badly injuring themselves. I'd say, if they keep it up beyond one or two instances and it seems to be a serious health risk, they ought to be institutionalized.

I think this would actually aid the cutter in projecting the "tortured soul" image upon release. With good fortune, having stayed in an asylum like Hannibal Lector and other dark, tortured characters, will take the place of recreational self-mutilation.

Peacelove,
Aldousage
 
^i gather from most of the posts in this thread, if not all, its not for attention or a 'tortured soul' look - in fact there r ppl covering their scars
why wud they do that if they wanted attention?
forgive me again if im wrong - i dont know enough about it, but the 2 ppl i knew who were cutters did not seem to b out to get attention
 
from what ive gathered, its about endorphins, the need to FEEL something, and impulsions OCD, self hatred, and attention in some cases. but not attention alone, thats a deep subject, and a simple generalization.

ive never done it, but i dont gamble either(another impulsive behavior), i have my many other share of problems.
 
Aldousage said:
As I've stated before, I think this is mostly about garnering attention. This is because the fad has become particularly popular with youths. Please understand that I refer to it as a fad because twenty years ago, cutting was practically unheard of. The main reason people are doing it is because they hear about other people doing it.

I think the appeal lies in that it's a dark, scary thing to do. It's an inexpensive way of making a pseudo-martyr of the cutter - it helps to paint him or her as a "tortured soul", which - for a young person - can seem pretty cool (a la "The Crow", Marilyn Manson, etc).
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Interesting perspective.
But I am going to have to agree with drug_wench on this one and say that I suspect most people in this forum do not fall in to the category of "doing it for attention". I can certainly vouch for myself and say that it never has been and never will be about getting attention for me.
 
Ive only slashed myself up a few times usually when i was suffering a mixed state episode and/or drunk. I always covered my scars up and wore long sleaves till my arms healed up. I hate the fact that it's almost a fad now. I only do it when im really low as fuck and im certainly not proud of it nor do i look for attention.
 
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