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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

Cutting v. 2

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I cut my arm up pretty bad earlier this week and it looked awful. Thankfully the razor blade was dull so it didnt cut too deep so there where maybe only 3 slashes that required stitches which i didnt get because the last place i wanted to be was in a hospital. Over 20 cuts on my arm all due to a real bad stupid manic episode i had during opiate withdrawals.

I hadent cut since june prior to this and im not a cutter by nature. Well thats a lie really its just that sometimes im in so much mental pain that i need to get it out somehow.
 
Big hugs PA <3
Take care of those cuts so they heal well okay?
It's hard to resist cutting when we're in a bad state of mind but do you have any methods of avoiding cutting when/if this happens next time??

Oh, and throw out the razor blades hun. You don't need them.
 
Aww thanks big hugs back <3. Im making sure they don't get infected or anything thats the last thing i need. I gotta invest in a punching bag i think cause that will help. My punching bag is usually a brick or concreate wall hence why my knuckles are scar tissue and ive never even broken one though i did drive my pinky back abit. A punching bag would be a safe way of getting that mental pain out.

As for the razor blades i kinda need em for shaving ;). Could grow a beard again i suppose lol.
 
Ahhhh but of course...shaving...

Yeah grow a beard! Beard's are cool :)
Or get an electric shaver??

We've got a punching bag and it's great. I know what you mean about scar tissue on your hands, my hands are completely fucked from punching walls :(
Especially in cold weather, it's like arthritis or something? Can that happen from repeated trauma?
 
^ Don't punch walls! :(

I used to do that alot when I was a dickhead speed freak and one day, after my doctor telling me i would, i broke my hand. *sigh* Worst stupidest thing I've ever fucking done. More than TWO years later, and two surgeries on it, I get pain every single day. Why? Because the muscle has collapsed. :| I can barely even write in class without it stiffening up and hurting like hell. I have to do hand exercises now to try and build it back up but its looking pretty bad.

Get a punching bag. If you must punch, and look after your hands. <3
 
n3ophy7e said:
Ahhhh but of course...shaving...

Yeah grow a beard! Beard's are cool :)
Or get an electric shaver??

We've got a punching bag and it's great. I know what you mean about scar tissue on your hands, my hands are completely fucked from punching walls :(
Especially in cold weather, it's like arthritis or something? Can that happen from repeated trauma?
Click to expand...

It can damage yer bones for sure and cause arthritis. Mine don't hurt at all but ive ripped the skin right off my knuckles more then a few times. Probably the only reason i never broke bones is because i used to work out doing knuckle pushups which really toughens up your knuckles and is a excellent way to get yer aggression out.

And ya i might go back to the long hair and beard hippie look i had goin years back :\.
 
^^ I'm so sorry to hear about your break-up, it will hurt a bit less each day <3
But please don't cut. It will only lengthen the pain.

I'm at a real crossroad in my life and it's scary and confusing. Why is it that cutting is so forefront in my mind??? An automatic coping mechanism.
But actually doing it would make everything so much worse!
I haven't done it for months, and I can't do it again.
 
does anyone know of some methods to help with scars?
i haven't cut myself in over five years, however, i have some scars on my thighs (curse words) that i have never been able to get rid off... makes me uncomforable to wear a bikini and whatnot. i've tried coco butter and mederma and whatnot, doesn't help...
 
opsite.jpg


This will only work *best* on new, ie a few day old scars. I highly recommend this.
 
Dangerously dangerously close to giving in.

My own scars are a trigger.

I just have to keep distracting myself in all ways possible...
 
Thanks for the support mate <3

*edit*
Sorry, I'm kinda using this as a journal...

I'm sitting here, alone, in the dark, bottle of red wine in hand, obsessive thoughts of cutting.
Just that adrenaline rush....
The knife is in the drawer only 3 metres away. It seems to be beckoning me. Taunting me.
It would feel so fucking good.

Thankfully I have the sensibility realise that it will not solve any problems, and the strength to not give in...
 
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N30phy7e, I hope you feel better. And I am so proud of you for not cutting, you should be proud too! I know what you mean about having it call to you. It's almost unbearable, and relentless. BUt you can def. do it. <3
 
^^ I won't <3

xxi135 said:
N30phy7e, I hope you feel better. And I am so proud of you for not cutting, you should be proud too! I know what you mean about having it call to you. It's almost unbearable, and relentless. BUt you can def. do it. <3
Click to expand...

Thanks so much hun <3

I know I can get through the night without doing it.
 
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