I've heard of heroin addicts who go and get a little heroin because they don't want to take too much, but that never works because once they run out, they go right back and get more. I don't know, it's just addict's logic to think having a little at a time will help. You'll only just go back for more and more if you're truly hooked.
A lot more difficult with benzos, people don't sell benzos like they sell other drugs out there, you usually need friends who are also scripted some like I did with a couple girls, one with 2mg ativans and the other with 30mg serax, we would help each other in case of no benzos. Thing is, benz wd can kill. Not opiate wd, had I known all the shit methadone and bupe gave me, I would have enduredthe 11 days my cousin did after he went to Montreal hitch hiking with 3000 bucks in his wallet only to find some H and get wasted, he came back, was lucky to have bus money to come back home, he almost lost it, and was sick for 11 days and never shot up again. Only reason I went to ORT was to save my money and get a painkiller without too many questions (methadone works well for pain), although it made me gain 100 pounds..would they script the pills for pain that go 1,5,10,25mg, I could have went much lower than 65mg. Plus I always questioned how (not anymore) but at first when I had to switch pharmacy because not all of them do the methadone in orange juice in the brown bottle hydrocodone and codeine syrup (pure) comes in thing, they get government monies to do so and they were the only ones in my area of town. I'm sure one of the bitch who looked at me like if I was some kind of monster when I look like a jock or whatever, no typical junkie signs, that if she prepared, and its the technicians who did, doses at night when they closed, shorted you with the liquid, the 10mg/ml and the 1mg/ml to give you the dose you need, as I was going 2-3mg per month, I was taking stuff like 57mg etc., not hard to understand. Well I should have continued with methadone, when I reached 39mg, the scheduled 2 days with nothing then outpatient, well, I was in a room only for suboxone induction and if all was well, came in the next day, and left with a dose I felt was ok. But when I was at 39mg of methadone, it was like, I got zero pain, my pain issue is totally in control yet I don't feel high at all (unlike when I reached 40mg the first time, a 10mg jump, I remember feeling it hard then), could have continued tapering that easily, if it was still 2-3mg per month. But no, now I have 26 fillings after 2 years thanks to the lemon-lime suboxone pills, fuck. I know I could have manned up and just endured it, had 2 benzo scripts, clonidine, immodium, benadryl, when I was shooting up 32-64mg dillies a day. I kicked it a couple times myself, easily, but the prospect of having to do it yet another time was way too hard mentally to accept.
Well I should have. With benzos well, I was put on clonazepam first for seizure control, psychiatrist was told I was on it, just raised the dose for the GAD.
Librium is the first benzo
Valium came a little after. They mostly give it to people who are detoxing from massive alcohol abuse these days, although, I find it great for sleep compared to even 30mg temazepam, at 75mg though sure, hehe, 3x25mg. Which, depending on what you take, you could be taking a hundred milligram+ for a week at first if switching to Librium.
