plazma's insight into his experience with interactions between his mind and the female mind (As demonstrated by BopGirl)
1. Does my bum look big in this? *He better say no!*
Honey, if yo ass looks big, I'm gonna tell you the truth, it looks big. But more importantly than whether it looks big, is whether I LIKE IT, if I like it, the size don't matter. If I didn't like it, then you probably wouldn't have hung around me long enough for you to ask me whether I thought yo ass looked big in what you're wearing.
2. No honey, I'm exhausted!
Hey, guys get tired too, the difference is, we make the effort in terms of getting laid. And, unless you're one of those fanatical 'woman on top' types, then odds are, I'm doing most of the work, so I mean, meet me halfway here!
3. I wish he'd help more around the house!
I'm actually one of those guys who does know how to cook more than fried eggs, secondly, I know the precise way that a scrubbing brush should interact with the pan, in order for them to result in a solution known as 'clean'.
4. No honey, I've got a headache
Headache schmeadake, sex IS the best painkiller there is, and even if it isn't, it should work along the lines of smacking yourself on the toe to cure toothache, sure it won't stop the pain, but it'll stop you thinking about it. Right?
On that note, I'd like to relay a joke.
Mr Jones gets home from the pub, pissed as fuck, and his wife wakes up to him cramming panadol into her mouth. She spits them out and screams.
Mrs Jones - "what the FUCK do you think you're doing?"
Mr Jones - "Don't you have a headache?"
Mrs Jones - "No I bloody well don't!"
Mr Jones - "Great, let's fuck!"
:D
5. Shopping
I like shopping, its just that my credit card is a shy, retiring little thing, and does not always perform on demand. If you can't deal with it, lump it.
6. No honey, it's that time of the month!
To quote raverdave - "Wade through mud, fuck through blood". And if that grosses you out, then why is anal so socially acceptable?
7. Bitch about new neighbours
I HATE TV!
8. No honey, the kids are awake!
See *Contraception.
9. New cleo is out!
DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!
10. Baby, we're home alone ... do you wanna ???
Please baby, please, say "fuck" and you'll have all the oral sex you can handle!!!!
Anyway, reading through that explains the vast majority of my incompatibility with the female of the species.
-plaz out-