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Bluelight Singles - from begining to end! don't we love the merge feature!

Thanks guys!

(Me sends happy thoughts boy's way - i'm impatient and impulsive at the best of times, so calling sooner rather than later will not be misconstued as being desperate in any way!)
 
Hmmm... numbers... there's always a bit of confusion about this...

I met a great guy the other night and he asked for my number, so i gave it to him. He messaged me that night to tell me about one of our mutual friends, and thus i now have his number. Is it wrong for me to ring it though, seeing as he didn't actually give it to me?
My thoughts are that if he sent me the message, then he couldn't mind me having the number, however some of my friends disagree... 8)

Thoughts anyone?
 
His SMS was to start the ball rolling with the least discomfort to both parties. As he SMS'd you that quickly, he must be keen. Call him. He'll be stoked! :)

At the very least, SMS him!
 
^^^ just been thinking how stupid the dating game is.... haha like if he sms' u then its not as if he has rung u therefore its kinda like a gday without having to commit to that whole telephone convo next big conversation where u can see whether he likes u and wants to continue... u would be seen as rather forward to ring his number when all he has done has smsed u.... but would not by returning the sms... thereby putting the needle back towards him to take this dance to the next stage... but u dont want this to become an sms situation so a firm stance must be taken at some point....

arghhh technology at last its giving guys loopholes in the dating game...

my opinion?.... sorry i just talk on tangents :D
 
just ring him cosmic! go 4 it!! why not! u go grl and show him some pussy power go ricki go ricki its ya bday... hmmm i think im going nuts after my pc has fucked up again after only having it back for 5 days *cries* wait i think i was nuts b4 that...
 
A number is like a victory medal. After you have slaughtered the giant beast you cut its head off and stuff it, creating a romantic addition to your wall of death. Getting a girls number is the modern equivalent of this medievil act.

;)
 
^^^LOL!! Well, in that case i will call him when i get back from europe (next weekend.) He knows i'm going away for a little while, so it's all good... :)

Heh heh, yay for free airport internet! Without it i would have died of boredom. Singapore here i come!! =D
 
I gotta say, that technology is making the "dating game" so much easier. For all partys involved.

/ Like person
You can send random SMS throughout the week, and stay in contact easily.

If your nervous about asking a question, you can just SMS it.


/ Dislike person
If you don't want to speak to the person, just let the voicemail take it.

You can reject an invitation over an SMS, and don't have to worry about any talkback.

If the above, messages back.. You can just ignore it !

You dont have to reply to an SMS!
 
still here...

i've learned a lot, and its very hard to be all alone again, when i felt so ALIVE for a short time. i had a small taste, a very unsure and special taste, and i know now for sure that i cannot live without love. i need it.

but i'm not strong enuff to pretend to myself that i can be happy without it. i keep wondering what i have done wrong, and how i can improve myself to make people like me. its like ive back-tracked to where i was this time last year, back when i was fat and had bad skin and low self-esteem. i'm a lot more open now, but its like i've still got so far to go, and i am beginning to believe that i've missed the boat when it comes to love.

maybe there is nobody out there for me... i don't want to believe it, but today at work i had an awful knot in my chest, a feeling of panic and worry, that i would be left behind and never ever find the person for me.

people keep saying to "hold on" and "wait" as if things will just happen, but this is not my character. i have always been a person who MAKES THINGS HAPPEN. i don't like to sit around and just let the world go by, but i feel hopeless, as if there is nothing worth living for.

i miss my family, i am all alone in sydney... on wednesday i was at a party surrounded by beautiful girls and i even spoke to a few of them, but i was too drunk to be myself and i missed out on a girl who was so beautiful... and i blew it!!!

sometimes i wish i could be a different person.

NB : after writing this i scrolled back a bit and read some of the other posts, and even the one i posted last week... i guess i'm just feeling lonely now... not having people around you, even your family, does get to you after a while. well, i'm going out tonight and maybe i'll meet somebody... but yeah... i doubt it... everybody tells me that "don't try as hard and you'll meet somebody", well if that's the case then i'm never gonna meet somebody, because i always try, and i never give up... i don't want to quit and accept my fate, but by not accepting my fate, i'm producing it and dooming myself to the fate that i sooooo don't want...

c'mon, i'm here, find me! PLEASE!!!

Cohaa.
 
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miss slingshot said:
While I normally forget about any number i may have given out within a good 10 minutes of doing so, when someone makes a big deal out of it, i stupidly assume this is indictive of an increased likelyhood of them calling and stupidly again start to get my hopes up.

I just want people to be upfront and honest, i know its unrealistic, but when you have conversastions about this very topic, you'd hope this would be one instance in which they would be.
Click to expand...

why can't the girl call the guy? i seem to get lots of numbers from girls when i go to parties... they don't seem to mind giving them to me, and one or two have led to friendships, but generally i get knocked back when i try to ring a girl who i've got a number off... once i was given the wrong number, once i was told "why did you ring me?" in a rude way... i'm at the stage where i just don't think that i am what girls want.

can any girl here please tell me what they want from a guy? i mean, i just want to know if i stand a chance in this world. i want to be able to be myself, but if nobody wants ME then why shouldn't i change?

its always friendship, but never love... why never love? why?

Cohaa.
 
First reply for me in this thread but I have been in this "situation" for quite a while now (2.5yrs). I have just about given up attempting anything serious with females because Iam just sick and tired of being put through the emotional grinder. Now I don't seem to have any problems when going out and having some "fun" (especialy lately) but when it comes to meeting someone where it's not just based solely on the lust factor and I want to pursue it further then just a root it ALWAYS fucks up. Now you might be sitting there reading this thinking well maybe the issue/problem lies squarely with me. In some instances it most likely has and I have acknowledged this? Maybe I have been too pushy? So what do I do, I back off and be all chilled about it but do you think that works... NO, then iam accused of not showing enough interest. The line is so damn fine with you girls!

Here's my reason for needing to vent my spleen....

Meet what seems to be a nice girl at St.Kilda Festival in Febuary, have a chat for about half hour and there seems to be a friendly connection. She gives me her number and tells me it's her birthday the next w/end and iam invited if I want to come. I don't end up going on her advice that there is someone there that iam not exactly too friendly with. All Good. That Sunday night SHE sends me an SMS saying she had a huge birthday and would like to catch up during the week for Dinner. Obviously I accept. Had dinner and drinks and got along like a house on fire, couldn't shut us both up. Great! Sends me an SMS afterwards saying she had a really nice night, hope to catch up soon. I organise Dinner the following week, pay for her meal... she even opens up to me about personal stuff about family trauma when growing up etc. which seems to show a great deal of trust in me already.

Afterwards she hopes I can come out to where she was going on that Friday night but I already had plans. Oh well no biggie I think. Have dinner again following week and have another nice in depth chat. This was over 2 weeks.... this was the last time I have seen her. Afterwards I said lets catch up on the w/end, says she is too busy with Grandparents coming down. No problems will organise to catch up soon. The next week says she is busy with heaps of stuff, so I said ok then you give me a call and let me know when YOU do have the time to catch up. No call for a week, so I SMS saying hey how was your week, what you up to? Lets catch up soon. It's now a week later and NOTHING :\

Now girls I want to know WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I DONE WRONG??!! Seriously. This girl seems to have her shit together. 26, holds down a corporate job, has travelled, easy going etc. I swear I have said nothing wrong to scare her (I was deliberatly careful in what I said as sick of being fucked around in the past), I didn't push her we just kissed each other on the cheek at beginning and end of each "date". It was just carefree and relaxed. I just wanted to get to know her better and I was... until now. Maybe she is really busy, ok, accepted but SO AM I and it's not hard to make a bloody phone call is it??

I know I shouldn't generalise but you girls are a VERY strange breed. Either I just know how to pick the wrong ones.... getting close to double figure attempts in terms of pursuing something serious in the past 2.5 years. Or iam doing something seriously wrong. Surely the law of averages would say iam due... *sigh" I dunno :\
 
Cohaagen said:

i keep wondering what i have done wrong, and how i can improve myself to make people like me.
Click to expand...

I think you have your answer right there Cohaa... you can't make people like you, no matter how hard you try. Improving yourself so YOU like yourself better is great, but you can never have an honest relationship with someone if you are just trying to fit the mould of what you think they will like.

I know you are probably tired of hearing it, but be yourself. If you meet someone who likes you for who you are, can there be any better basis for a r'ship?
 
Cohaagen said:
people keep saying to "hold on" and "wait" as if things will just happen, but this is not my character. i have always been a person who MAKES THINGS HAPPEN.
Click to expand...
This is the most frustrating thing about being single....that there's nothing you can do to meet someone. Everything else in your life you can 'make things happen' but this is one thing we have no control over. Sucks but that's life.

Originally posted by katmeow
I think you have your answer right there Cohaa... you can't make people like you, no matter how hard you try.
Click to expand...
I agree with her Cohaa. It sounds corny but when you accept yourself and have confidence in yourself, you won't need to 'make' people like you. People like people who like themselves. I learnt that the long, hard way.

It's a hard road but it can be done. Good luck :)


Originally posted by E^lEctric
Now girls I want to know WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I DONE WRONG??!!
Click to expand...
Doesn't sound like you did anything wrong. She probably just met someone else. Move onwards and upwards....
 
E^lEctric said:
Now girls I want to know WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I DONE WRONG??!! Seriously.

I know I shouldn't generalise but you girls are a VERY strange breed.
Click to expand...

Yep!!! They sure are! :)

well, that's 1/2 the fun i guess... but i do feel happy for the people who have met girls/guys who they are able to be comfortable with, love, have good sex with and have a good friendship with too. That is what i want eventually, but i think it will take a while to happen. I mean, i'm comfortable with not too many people, but that is mainly my own fault, i've always been very shy and introverted, but that is changing and i'm making it happen. its my own fault... but i'm correcting it. :)

on the weekend i met a beautiful girl. she is french/canadian, a model, and she is pure and has a beautiful soul, and all i did with her was just snuggle up to her and talk to her for about 90 minutes. she is only going to be in australia for a short while, but the time i spent with her was beautiful. and she didn't pull away, she accepted me for who i am, and i think she liked me too :) but i don't want to pursue it, if i see her again then its meant to be but there is more to love than just sex and physical attraction, but that part of it is important. i would much rather be in love with somebody who i find sexually attractive and who i desire physically, but that sort of thing does grow on you the more you get to know people.

you have done nothing wrong, its not your fault. if you try your best then thats good... :)

her loss mate! :)

Cohaa.
 
*sigh* same :(

singledome is fun and this thread makes it seem depressing...even tho it can be lonely at times despite who u haqve around or whatever...u dont have to be alone to be lonely hey?
 
what? what'd i say now? why dosent anyone understand me? *sigh* oh come on u know i go off in my own ramblings all the time... 8)
 
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